Many people are understandably confused about the relationship between sex and BDSM because... the relationship is very confusing. In this episode, Julie draws from the research she's conducted on the BDSM subculture as well as her extensive personal experience to try to answer the question "is BDSM about sex?" The short answer is, "ish, but you should never trust anyone who gives you a simple answer to this question, because it's extremely personal and subjective."

Referenced in this episode:

⁠Please Scream Quietly: A Story of Kink⁠, by Juile Fennell

⁠"The Prosocial Sadist,"⁠ by Jennifer Erickson and Brad Sagarin