Have you ever done something in a moment of pressure and thought — why did I just do that?

Checked your phone compulsively. Avoided a conversation you knew you needed to have. Reacted in a way that didn't reflect who you want to be.

Most of the time, those behaviors aren't random.

They're driven by two very powerful internal forces: craving and avoidance.

Craving pulls us toward what feels comfortable or pleasurable. Avoidance pushes us away from what feels uncomfortable or uncertain. And together, they quietly run a huge portion of our daily decisions without us even noticing.

In this episode, we go deeper into how the mind actually works, specifically the role that urges play in keeping us stuck in patterns we're trying to change.

Inside this conversation, I walk you through:

• What craving and avoidance are and how they drive most of our behaviors

• Why urges feel urgent and permanent, even when they're neither

• The urge wave concept taught inside the Cognitive Freedom Method™ and how it works

• Why most people act at the worst possible moment of an emotional wave

• What urge surfing is and how to use it as a practical skill

• Why the goal is never suppression, but building the capacity to choose

• How learning to sit with an urge builds the internal architecture of real confidence and self trust

When you stop reacting automatically to every urge, something shifts.

You create space. You build trust in yourself. And you begin to experience what cognitive freedom actually feels like in practice.

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Dr. Shyamala Kiru is a former psychotherapist of 20 years and the founder of Kiru Psychotherapy Clinic and the Cognitive Freedom Method™. Through her work in leadership development, practitioner training, and clinical practice (now retired), she teaches a structured framework for understanding and transforming the cognitive patterns that shape how we think, lead, and relate.

📘 The Emotionally Intelligent Woman Available on Amazon and Chapters Indigo

🎧 The Dr. Shyamala Show Listen on Apple Podcasts and Spotify

Learn more at

cognitive-freedom.com

kirupsychotherapy.com

Real freedom begins when you understand your mind.

Where to Connect:

• My Clinic: Kiru Psychotherapy: https://kirupsychotherapy.com

• Psychotherapy + Structured Support: Cognitive Freedom Method™: https://kirupsychotherapy.com/cognitive-freedom-program/

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• INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/iam.drshyam/