Utah's Hope

You picked your person. So why are the dishes, in-laws, money, and one badly timed comment enough to make you wonder what happened? Why is marriage so hard? Counselor Debra Fileta joins Dave and Ann Wilson on FamilyLife Today to unpack the expectations and baggage we drag to the altar—and why hard doesn’t necessarily mean you married wrong.

Show Notes and Resources

• Choosing Marriage: Why It Has to Start With We > Me.
• Debra Fileta.
• Weekend to Remember.

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Proverbs 18:11 says, “The wealth of the rich is their fortified city; they imagine it a wall too high to scale.” Money can provide real protection—but it can also give us a false sense of security. In 1 Samuel 25, a wealthy man named Nabal learned just how dangerous that can be. On the next Faith & Finance Live, Rob West discusses this further. Then, it’s on to calls. That’s Faith and Finance Live . . . biblical wisdom for your financial decisions. That’s weekdays at 4pm Eastern/3pm Central on Moody Radio.

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“The wealth of the rich is their fortified city; they imagine it a wall too high to scale.” — Proverbs 18:11 (NIV)

Money can provide real protection, but it can also create a dangerous illusion of security. We may begin to believe that enough savings, investments, or possessions can shield us from whatever life brings.

In 1 Samuel 25, we encounter a wealthy man named Nabal whose story illustrates the danger of placing too much confidence in earthly riches. His experience reminds us that while financial resources are valuable tools, they can never provide the ultimate security our hearts desire.

Nabal was an extremely wealthy man, owning 3,000 sheep and 1,000 goats. His wife, Abigail, is described as intelligent and discerning, but Nabal himself was harsh and badly behaved.

At the time, David was fleeing from King Saul. While David and his men lived in the wilderness, they spent time near Nabal's shepherds. Rather than taking advantage of them, David's men helped protect them and their livestock.

One of Nabal's servants later described David's men as a wall around them, both day and night. Their presence had provided genuine protection.

When sheep-shearing season arrived—a time of celebration and abundance—David sent several young men to Nabal with a respectful request for provisions. Considering the protection David's men had provided, the request was reasonable. But Nabal responded with contempt.

“Who is David? Who is the son of Jesse?” he asked (1 Samuel 25:10).

Rather than acknowledging the help he had received or sharing from his abundance, Nabal dismissed David entirely. His wealth had not made him generous or grateful. Instead, his response revealed a troubling arrogance.

Nabal's story brings Proverbs 18:11 into focus:

“The wealth of the rich is their fortified city; they imagine it a wall too high to scale.”

Notice that last phrase: “They imagine it.” Wealth really can provide a measure of protection. Savings create financial margin. Insurance helps manage risk. Wise planning prepares us for unexpected challenges. Scripture consistently commends prudence and diligence.

The danger comes when practical security becomes ultimate security.

Nabal seems to have believed his wealth, position, and possessions put him beyond the reach of trouble. But while he enjoyed his abundance, David was preparing to retaliate against him with armed men.

The wall of security Nabal imagined was far weaker than he thought.

This story offers an interesting contrast. David's men had served as a real wall of protection for Nabal's household, yet Nabal's arrogance threatened to destroy the very security he enjoyed.

He had considerable wealth, but he lacked the wisdom to recognize his vulnerability.

When Abigail learned what had happened, she acted quickly.

She gathered provisions, went out to meet David, and approached him with remarkable humility and discernment. She acknowledged the danger, urged David not to take vengeance, and reminded him of God's promises concerning his future.

Her intervention prevented unnecessary bloodshed and restrained David from responding to Nabal's foolishness with violence.

The contrast between husband and wife could hardly be sharper. Nabal possessed tremendous wealth but lacked wisdom. Abigail demonstrated humility, discernment, and an awareness that their household was not beyond danger.

Their story illustrates an important truth: Financial resources are valuable, but they cannot replace godly wisdom.

A person can have considerable wealth and still make decisions that threaten everything they've accumulated. Likewise, someone with fewer resources may demonstrate the wisdom, humility, and prudence that lead

Campers who like to go out into the boondocks to find a remote campsite sometimes fly drones to look ahead at what’s around the next bend. They can make better decisions with a bird’s eye view. Well, we’ll make better decisions about our lives if we trust God’s view . . . the one that sees around the bend and well into the future. Today on A NEW BEGINNING, Pastor Greg Laurie brings some encouraging insights about the will of God and how it’ll keep us from being spiritually stranded in the boondocks.

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Marriage is such a special bond, and a beautiful gift from God. But it doesn’t come without its challenges. Dr. Dan Allender teaches how you can work with your spouse to achieve true healing from past trauma to help strengthen your marriage.

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Healing Begins Here: Trauma has a way of lingering, not just in memory, but in the body, in patterns of thought, and sometimes even in the way we relate to God. And yet, what has shaped you does not have to define you.

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