Here's Valentines day tip: demonstrate your love. Do you demonstrate your love for your spouse? Most of us feel love towards the person we are married to. But do you consistently demonstrate that love? How do you know if someone means what they say? It's when they follow up their words with their actions.   

God did that for us. Romans 5:8 says that God demonstrated his own love for us in this, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. He didn't just say it, he demonstrated his love for us by his actions. We need to do the same for our spouses.   

One of the problems I help couples solve in my marriage coaching is the wife not feeling loved or special. Her husband loves her but he doesn't know how to express that or demonstrate that. Because he doesn't know how, most of the time he doesn't do anything. And when he does do something, it usually fails.   

How do you demonstrate your love? Here's a suggestion - spend a few moments thinking about what your spouse likes and then get him/her that. It's not rocket science! But we often wait until the last minute and then scramble to do something that will send the right message. My suggestion is to think about it beforehand, make a plan and then execute the plan.   

Recently my wife and I went away for a few days to celebrate our anniversary. In addition to getting her a card and a gift, I also bought her flowers, bought a special scented candle and packed our bluetooth speaker so we could have some music. She loved these extra things and I could tell that my demonstration of love for her made her feel special.   

For more suggestions, I wrote an entire chapter about this in my book, Turn it Up! - how to have the lifelong marriage you really want.  You can get a copy at turnitup.coach/book.   Also check out the free video course and other marriage resources at https://turnitup.coach/helpful-tools/