In episode 46, we welcome back returning guest Hilary Buckwalter-Wilde for an essential and deeply impactful conversation. A must-listen for anyone committed to healing, telling the truth, and building safer relational futures.
Listeners may remember Hilary from Episode 5, where she courageously shared her story of surviving narcissistic abuse within an intimate partner relationship. Since then, she has continued to transform her lived experience into meaningful action—flipping the script in an incredible way.
Hilary is the Founder and Executive Director of Healing Hearts, a survivor-led nonprofit dedicated to creating safer healing spaces, healthier dating ecosystems, and systemic accountability for intimate partner violence and narcissistic abuse. A trauma-informed practitioner with more than two decades of experience, she brings a rare blend of scholarly depth, lived expertise, and visionary leadership to the movement for relational safety.
Together, we explore the traits of the larger system of harm our society has been steeped in for centuries. As Hilary powerfully names, this is “trauma we call culture.” It feels familiar because it’s everywhere—even in spaces we label as safe or growth-oriented: families of origin, churches, yoga studios, therapy offices, healing communities, and dating platforms. When harm hides in plain sight, it can be difficult to name. This conversation helps us do exactly that.
Hilary’s soon-to-be-launched organization seeks to protect, advocate, educate, and support those who are ready to tell the truth about patterns of harm—especially when those truths are inconvenient or disruptive. We discuss what it takes to move from silence to clarity, from isolation to collective support.
This episode is the epitome of heavy to hopeful. It was an honor to celebrate Hilary and witness this brilliant, necessary work being birthed into the world. This is survivorship 101 and she wrote the code.