Voice Is

Julie and Casey sit down with San Francisco actor (and Julie's fellow MFA alumni) Rotimi Agbabiaka to talk about his journey as an actor who never fit into anyone's idea of what he should be.  Along the way, they talk about visibility, claiming space, how what is "true" isn't necessarily what is "realistic" what it's like to develop the character of "God", and owning your strut.

Rotimi Agbabiaka is an actor, writer, director, and teacher who uses humor, glamor, and drama to challenge the status quo. Most recently, Rotimi originated the role of Salima in House of Joy (California Shakespeare Theatre) and the role of Cellphone in If Pretty Hurts Ugly Must Be a Muhfucka (Playwrights Horizons, NYC). Other acting credits includeFather Comes Home From The Wars … (Yale Rep, American Conservatory Theatre) Tom Waits’ Black Rider (Shotgun Players), Bootycandy (Brava Theater, Theatre Bay Area award), originating the role of Boy in runboyrun (Magic Theatre), and several shows with the Tony Award-winning San Francisco Mime Troupe. Rotimi's solo play, Homeless, won Best Solo Performance at the SF Fringe Festival and Type/Caste, Rotimi's next solo, premiered at the National Queer Arts Festival and received the Theatre Bay Area award for Outstanding Solo Production. Rotimi's latest solo, MANIFESTO, plays San Francisco's Brava Theater in February 2020. Rotimi also cowrote the play, Seeing Red, with Joan Holden and Ira Marlowe, receiving a TBA award nomination for Outstanding World Premiere Musical. Rotimi teaches acting, movement, and play creation to students from pre-school through college and has presented work at museums (the deYoung), in parks (with We Players), on street corners (with Jess Curtis’ GRAVITY), and on nightlife stages around the world. www.rotimionline.com

Julie and Casey head out to Oakland to sit down with Maya Borgueta, founder of Stella Nova Psychology - they dive into emotional labor, how diversity movements in the workplace might be set up to fail, imposter syndrome, self-care, Chopin, and why beating yourself up is NOT, in fact, the secret to productivity. 

TOP TAKEAWAYS FROM THIS EPISODE:

• It’s important to separate “shame” (“I am bad”) from “guilt” (“I did a bad thing”), particularly in thorny conversations about racism and diversity/inclusion.  (Thanks Brene Brown)
• If you’re asking your employees to do the work of helping your workplace be more diverse and inclusive, you may be preventing them from doing their ACTUAL job, and asking them to perform a ton of emotional labor.  Instead, hire an expert and give them the power to change things.
• Define your core values - both general and for communication - to give your life a north star.  They should be a little aspirational, and you won’t nail it 100% of the time.
• Imposter syndrome is pervasive, and connected to some really unhelpful ideas about what “confidence” looks like.  You don’t have to feel like a Boss Bitch 100% of the time - and if you do, maybe you aren’t being very self-reflective.
• Research says that people who are self-compassionate get more done and are more able to problem-solve than people who are self-critical . . . which might seem obvious, but is really hard in practice, especially for high achievers. 
• Self-care is a critical component of self-compassion, and it doesn’t always looks like bubble baths and face masks.  Sometimes the mundane stuff is way more crucial to taking good care of yourself.
• Power = the ability to enact your agenda

Maya Borgueta, PsyD, is a licensed clinical psychologist, a passionate lifelong feminist, and the founder of Stella Nova Psychology, Inc., a therapy clinic for women and non-binary professionals in downtown San Francisco. Her professional mission is to help women to live their most powerful and fulfilled lives at work and at home. Her personal mission is to pet as many cats as humanly possible. You can find Maya's work online at www.stellanovawomen.com, or by following Stella Nova on Facebook or Instagram @stellanovawomen.

Julie and Casey sit down remotely with Christina Blacken (founder of The New Quo) to talk about the power of story - telling your own story, and how organizations can use storytelling to "convey their unique purpose, navigate change, gain buy-in, and create status-quo breaking communications that shift hearts, mindsets, and culture for the better." 

TOP TAKEAWAYS FROM THIS EPISODE

• Sometimes growing up as an outsider can become a superpower - as in "I can't care what people thought"
• Living your life in order to be invisible MAY protect you from judgement (although it probably won't) - but what it will definitely do is keep you from realizing your full creativity and the impact you can have on the world.
• Storytelling is a powerful medium for communication - 65% of our daily communication is via storytelling.

"[Storytelling] is where the art comes in. As science fiction author Cassandra Clare writes, 'Fiction is truth, even if it is not fact.' This is what storytelling is for - and in fact research has found that people understood science better when it's communicated through storytelling...story goes where science can't." - Emily and Amelia Nagoski, Burnout

CHRISTINA'S BIO

1. I love cheese but its proven to not love me back. I also love stories. Why? They are the most powerful tools on the planet for connection and change. 65% of all daily communication is story.

2. My story starts with my family being part of the Great Migration from the South and landing in Utah, my childhood through teenage years home (questions about Mormons, being black in a place where about 3 other black people live, and the merits of Jello, are expected). My childhood of being an outsider religiously, politically, and racially taught me how powerful story can be for influencing how we treat one another.

3. I’ve used story to manage teams creating social movements in the non-profit world that inspired 300,000 young people to volunteer on various causes, and to connect brands to the communities they care about, helping secure 6.5M in profits for the companies and teams I've worked with and for along the way. I now teach the science and power of storytelling as a tool for creating deeper connection between people and creating influence and buy-in for bold ideas.

4. My mission is to flip the status-quo on leadership through story. Leadership isn’t an elitist and built-in trait — it’s the ability to inspire and move other people through your vision and the lessons you’ve gained across your life experiences. The New Quo is creating a new communication paradigm for a new generation of leadership, unleashing your potential to deeply connect, influence, and inspire others through your stories of change.

We will build stronger senses of self, create better products, service wider audiences, and solve seemingly insurmountable problems when we stand in our truths and share them authentically across diverse social lines.

Julie and Casey talk with Nicole Brewer, a thought leader and passionate activist for anti-racist theatre.  We talk racism, diversity and inclusion, owning your voice, and creating inclusive environments.  She shares with us both her personal and professional journey to the work she's doing today, and sets the house on fire with her truth bombs. Find more about Nicole and her work on her website.

Here is a bit more about Nicole:  

Nicole Brewer earned her M.F.A. in Acting from Northern Illinois University and her B.F.A. from Howard University. She's worked professionally as an actor, director and educator in the San Francisco Bay Area as well as in Washington DC.  Nicole has facilitated workshops in embodied acting techniques and disrupting traditional acting training programs at the 2017 and 2018 TCG conference, The Black Theatre Festival in Winston Salem, North Carolina, and internationally at Goldsmith’s University in London.  

She is a founding member of the HBC Playback Theatre Ensemble in Washington D.C. who at the time was the only all-female women of color playback ensemble in The United States.  She is the founder of Creative Acts Learning Center LLC in Washington DC which provided workshops and seminars to actors in the Nation’s Capital.  

In 2019, Nicole launched reportracisttheatre.com as tool for reporting racism when it occurs in theatre.  She authored two articles that outlined the need for the theatre industry to shift to being anti-racist; Why Equity Diversity and Inclusion Are Obsolete published by American Theatre and Playwrights of Color, White Directors and Exposing Racist Policy published by HowlRound.  Nicole has spent the last 5 years refining an inclusive method of theatre training and practices which she calls Conscientious Theatre Training.  Nicole’s article, “Training With A Difference” published in the January 2018 edition of American Theatre highlight the need for theatre training to adapt more inclusive models of instruction.  Nicole is invited all over the US to teach workshops on both conscientious theatre training and anti-racist theatre. 

Ms. Brewer has worked at Duke Ellington School of the Arts, a premier performing arts high school in Washington D.C. as visiting faculty (acting).  Nicole is visiting faculty at the National Theater Institute (NTI). She was on faculty for seven and half years at Howard University. Nicole has also worked as faculty at Northern Virginia Community College and Montgomery College teaching acting and introduction to communications courses.  

She is a member of the 2018 artEquity cohort, VASTA, and Black Theatre Network.  Directing credits: Milk Like Sugar at The Black Rep, Jonkonnu at Howard University, and Hair Chronicles DC Fringe Festival. Acting Theater Credits include: White Rabbit Red Rabbit Theater Alliance,  For Colored Girls Colored Peoples Theater, In The Blood The Hegira, Tartuffe & Taming of the Shrew African American Shakespeare Company, Anton in Show Business Spreckels, and Gypsy and the Bully Door by Nina Mercer.  Nicole currently resides in Washington D.C. with her husband and three imperfectly perfect kids. 

Julie and Casey visit the offices of C.A. Goldberg Law to speak with actual superheroine Carrie Goldberg, victim’s rights attorney for people dealing with revenge porn, stalking and harassment, blackmail, sexual assault, etc.  Hear Carrie’s take on standing up to the powerful, getting over her fear of public speaking, embracing your inner f*ck you, and why sometimes the key to confidence is stabby accessories.

Content warning:  Discussion of Carrie’s cases, which involve victims of sexual assault, rape, and stalking, as well as some salty language.

TOP TAKEAWAYS FROM THIS EPISODE

• How you say your name is incredibly important - and worth working on.
• You are the only one who can tell your story - it’s not about you, it’s about the message
• You don’t need to feel combative with your audience, but you ALSO don’t need to coddle or accommodate them.
• Upping your tolerance for risk is a necessity for a big life - failures are raw material for the next level
• Imposter syndrome
• 24 hour rule: Celebrate the victories - and then move on so you can do the work
• Who gave you permission to take risks? Sometimes it comes from within, sometimes it’s from an important supporter in your life.  (Cultivate those supporters, and also cultivate your “inner f*ck you”.)
• What’s your superhero costume/armor?
• Imposter syndrome strikes even the most glamorous among us - and also maybe it’s a good thing.  It keeps us from wrecking the world, and it also leads us to prepare and do good work. 
• Have someone you can send a bat signal to when you’re scared.  Sharing fear helps us through it.  #neverworryalone
• You don’t have to be a perfect public speaker - ums and uhs aren’t the death of your gravitas.  
• You get to decide how (or whether to) use notes in your speech.
• “Play” = what’s left when you aren’t censoring yourself

Carrie Goldberg is a victims’ rights lawyer born and raised in Aberdeen, Washington. Her law firm, C.A. Goldberg, PLLC, is based in Brooklyn and litigates nationally for targets of online harassment, stalking, and sexual assault. Before starting her law firm, Carrie provided social services to Nazi victims and went on to become a lawyer for the Vera Institute of Justice. Her major litigations include Herrick v. Grindr, NNAF v. John Doe, Hadley v. City of Anaheim,L.W. as parent/guardian of K.M. v. New York City Department of Education. Her work was featured in the documentary Netizens. Carrie attended Vassar College and Brooklyn Law School. She resides in Brooklyn, New York. Carrie’s book Nobody’s Victim: Fighting Stalkers, Psychos, Pervs and Trolls was published by Penguin in August 2019.

Find Carrie Goldberg: website, twitter, instagram

Buy Carrie's book: Nobody’s Victim, Fighting Psychos, Stalkers, Pervs, and Trolls

Articles about cases mentioned:

Herrick vs Grinder

Craigslist case

Taking on the NYC Public School system

Julie joins Casey in NYC from San Francisco to talk all things Keynote, Panels and public speaking with the inimitable Kelly Hoey, author of “Build Your Dream Network” and all-around badass.

Follow Kelly on Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, YouTube, and Instagram and check out her fantastic podcast!

TOP TAKEAWAYS FROM THIS EPISODE

• Make your talk porous enough to allow for the unexpected
• Assume a benevolent audience (what’s the harm)
• Choose your most effective working style
• Instead of speeding up when time is short, slow down
• Leave people wanting more
• Find your foundation
• Build your speaking career before you need it
• Think how you can serve your audience instead of your audience serving you

Kelly Hoey is the author of Build Your Dream Network (January 2017 / Tarcher Perigee).

Kelly has been lauded from Forbes (“1 of 5 Women Changing the World of VC/Entrepreneurship”) to Fast Company (“1 of the 25 Smartest Women On Twitter”) to Business Insider (“1 of the 100 Most Influential Tech Women On Twitter”) and Inc. (“1 of the 10 Most Well-Connected People in New York City's Startup Scene”). EBW 2020 included her on their list of the “100 Most Influential Global Leaders Empowering Women Worldwide”.

Kelly’s career story is one of transformation – through networking. Her career started out with a law degree and a job in a big Toronto law firm. She continued along a predictable career path, until a chance opportunity landed in her lap in 2009 and she stopped playing it safe, leaping at the chance to work with a visionary leader of a global business network for women. Co-founding a startup accelerator then an interim CMO role with an emerging tech company are just part of her journey of reinvention as an author, writer, creator and investor. She has appeared on CNBC’s Power Pitch, moderated a speaker series at Apple, and contributed to publications such as The New York Times, Forbes.com, Fast Company, Inc. and more. Today, Kelly continues to spread her networking message as a sought-out speaker, and host of the Build Your Dream Network podcast.