In the aftermath of the Lions win over the Washington Conquistadors, Uncle Brother Ted, Deano Blandino, and Impossible Lomas are perplexed as to how to proceed. Well, not so much Blandino, who has the Wallbrook staff on high alert as they prepare his room and favorite snacks. We indulge in a review of the Lions' seemingly potent offense. Lomas lavishes praise on the O-line, as is his wont. Aidan Hutchinson receives his due after a 3-sack performance--the most ever by a rookie Lion. As Deuce Staley decreed in Hard Knocks, D'Andre Swift might actually be a top-tier running back. And Amon-Ra is on the verge of setting a record for the most games in a row with at least 8 catches. What the fuck is going on? Could the Lions' offense actually be ... y'know ... good? At least the defense still sucks massive donkey balls, Hutch's heroics aside. However many points the offense puts up, the defense is sure to yield on the other side of the ball, and so we're still likely looking at 5-6 wins, max. 

Still, for the first time in a while, there seems to be reason to hope that the Roar are actually on the right track. Which, for Roaraholics Nation, is a time of immense danger. If the Lions win next week on the road against the Vikings ... We'll cross that incredibly alarming bridge if/when we have to. Good Lord. Deep breath, people. Work the steps. Recite the serenity prayer. Stay close to family and friends. And in the worst case scenario, Wallbrook is only a call away, where you can join Deano in the rec room for a game of checkers.