We Nurture

Why Learning Through Imitation is Significant to Child Development

Episode S3E14: Show Notes.

Learning through imitation is significant to childhood development, but children don’t choose which examples to imitate, which can create challenges for parents and teachers. Today we sit with Stephen Spiltany, an influential teacher and author in the Waldorf education space. In this episode Stephen serves as a guiding voice, sharing details on why children imitate, how their imitations aren’t based on virtue but rather the result, and ways parents and teachers can cultivate methods that’ll lead to constructive imitation. We begin the show by hearing why it is crucial to understand the role of imitation for young children. After understanding that imitation is the primary way young children learn, Stephen tells us why children sometimes imitate the worst parts of their parents. Although adults can make themselves into better humans through their own decision-making processes and efforts, children don’t have the neurological development to achieve this. Stephen tells us that it’s the mindfulness and awareness of teachers and parents that can help children imitate positively. He goes on to detail how teachers and parents can create change in the imitation habits of children, but reminds listeners that change is an eventual outcome and cannot be made after one lesson. To hear more about child development through imitation, tune in with us today!

Key Points From This Episode:

• Introducing our returning guest, Stephen Spiltany.
• Why it is crucial to understand the role of imitation for young children.
• How seeing children imitate the worst parts of a parent can be triggering for the parent.
• Why “autopilot” mode is often the example parents offer to their children.
• The importance of developing yourself as a parent or teacher.
• Why imitation is so significant from a developmental perspective.
• How habits become ingrained in children.
• Why children can’t learn a new habit the first time around.
• How to cultivate better practices to encourage new, better imitations from children.

    Stephen Spitalny's Books
 -Conscious Parenting: A Guide to Living with Young Children
- Connecting with Young Children: Educating the Will
- What's the Story? Storytelling with Young Children as a Path Toward Living Happily Ever  
    After

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

We Nurture Collective

We Nurture on Instagram

We Nurture on Facebook

LifeWays North America

Stephen Spiltany

Stephen Spiltqny on Twitter

Santa Cruz Waldorf School

Books by Stephen Spitalny

Conscious Parenting: A Guide to Living with Young Children on Amazon

Once upon a time, long long ago in China there was a boy named Ping. Ping loved flowers and anything he planted would bloom.

The Emperor of the land loved flowers too. The time came when the Emperor had to choose an heir and this was a difficult choice. The Emperor gave a flower seed to each child and “said “Whoever can show me their best in a year's time," he proclaimed, "shall succeed me to the throne!"

Ping plants his seed and takes care of it every day. Month after month passes, and nothing grows and when the time comes, Ping must go to the Emperor with nothing but an empty pot.

Story adapted from original ‘The Empty Pot’ by Demi

Ages 3 to 7

To discover more about please visit wenurturecollective.com/stories-for-children

Today’s guest, Stephen Spiltany, has taught at the Santa Cruz Waldorf School since 1990. He offers courses and workshops worldwide, especially in Asia. He is also a parent and a grandparent and he has written three books and numerous articles about early childhood. In today’s episode, we go further into the development of young children as they discover and explore their awareness of self. Stephen takes us through what an undeveloped awareness of self is, with a comparison between that of an adult and that of a young child we broach the topic of the development of self, how we can recognize the sure signs of our child’s journey of discovering their sense of self, and he explains the concept of interoception. Stephen also shares with listeners about finding the balance between loving firmness and the appropriate distribution of autonomy, and the reasons why a developing child is unable to self-direct. Tune in today for all this and so much more, as we dive into this big topic on the essential aspects in creating connection and supportive development for our child. 

Key Points From This Episode:

• Stephen describes an undeveloped awareness of self in the adult versus the young child.
• What helps us recognize that our child's sense of self is burgeoning: the arc of development.
• How to consciously and kindly nurture your child's developing sense of self.
• How the adult state of consciousness differs from that of a child; the dream consciousness.
• Developing the sense of self and giving your child the option to “choose.
• Stephen shares some insights into finding the balance of loving firmness.
• How developing yourself as an adult will flow over and benefit your child.
• How being mindful and present is an important practice as you observe your child develop.

 Stephen Spitalny's Books
- Conscious Parenting: A Guide to Living with Young Children
- Connecting with Young Children: Educating the Will
- What's the Story? Storytelling with Young Children as a Path Toward Living Happily Ever After

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

We Nurture Collective

We Nurture on Instagram

We Nurture on Facebook

Stephen Spiltany

Stephen Spiltany on Twitter

Santa Cruz Waldorf School

Connecting With Young Children

Conscious Parenting

This Chinese folktale has been adapted and retold from the book 'Chinese Children's Favorite Stories' by storyteller and artist, Mingmei Yip.  The story is about a frog who lived in a well. The frog thought that he knew everything about the world but when a turtle visits one day, they have a conversation and the frog comes out of his well and discovers that the world is much bigger than his well!

We recommend this story for ages 3 to 7

To discover more about please visit wenurturecollective.com/stories-for-children

A child’s development is an intricate process that has been refined through millions of years of evolution. Being present during developmental years is a major responsibility for a parent or caregiver, and understanding how one can guide the process is key to a healthy, growing child. Today I sit with Stephen Spiltany, who has taught at Santa Cruz Waldorf School since 1990. I open my conversation with Stephen by discovering the nuances of the child’s brain. Stephen talks about why children don’t have complex decision-making and planning skills, and he touches on the different systems of the brain, namely the Reptilian brain and the Limbic system. Following this, Stephen digs deeper as we explore the limbic system a little further. Through this, listeners will hear how they can adjust their parenting and caring styles. According to Stephen, a child’s job is to explore and try things out, while a parent’s job is to create loving boundaries. He continues this exploration by sharing ways you can approach children who struggle to receive instruction. To find out how you can lead through example, and much, much more, be sure to join us today!

In today's episode, you'll discover;

• Why children don’t have complex decision-making and planning skills.
• Stephen explains the three systems of the human brain.
• Hear about how the prefrontal cortex has evolved over millions of years.
• How an understanding of limbic system development can influence our parenting styles.
• Ways parents and carers can meet the development needs of young children.
• Approaching a child that dismisses your behavior as a good example.
• Why children aren’t malicious but are rather looking for the adult’s attention.
• Proactive things to say when disciplining a child.
• Why it is best to wait for intellectual activity.
• Stephen explains what intellectual activity is.

We Nurture Collective

We Nurture on Instagram

We Nurture on Facebook

LifeWays North America

Stephen Spiltany

Santa Cruz Waldorf School

Conscious Parenting: A Guide to Living with Young Children on Amazon

Paul MacLean

National Institutes of Health

Gray’s Anatomy on Amazon

A Japanese Folktale

In Japan, there once lived an old man and old woman who had no food to eat one cold, cold winter. The old man went to the market to sell the old woman’s kimono so they could buy food and on the way he meets three statues.

We recommend this story for ages 3 to 7

To discover more about please visit wenurturecollective.com/stories-for-children

Today I sit down with Stephen Spitalny to talk about parenting with greater consciousness. As an early childhood educator, author, lecturer, and consultant, Stephen walks us through each layer of greater consciousness using his book Conscious Parenting: A guide to living with young children, as a reference. We begin our conversation by finding out more about Stephen and his background. Following this, we turn our focus toward the introduction of Stephen’s book and his intentions for writing it. He touches on why the essential gesture of the human being is the activity of connecting before telling us all the ways we can connect with ourselves. Stephen continues by sharing what inspired him to spread his message, as he refers to a powerful anecdote and how his experience inspired him to help adults discover effective and supportive ways of communicating with children. In the latter half of the episode, Stephen talks about connecting with your own consciousness and how being mindful or present is a pathway to cultivating this connection. To find out more about Stephen’s thoughts on parenting with greater consciousness, be sure to tune!  

You can find more about Stephen and the books he has published at chamakanda.com
Conscious Parenting: A Guide to Living with Young Children
Connecting with Young Childen: Educating the Will
What's the Story? Storytelling with Young Children as a Path Toward Living Happily Ever After

 Stephen Spitalny's Books
- Conscious Parenting: A Guide to Living with Young Children
- Connecting with Young Children: Educating the Will
- What's the Story? Storytelling with Young Children as a Path Toward Living Happily Ever After

We Nurture Collective

We Nurture on Instagram

We Nurture on Facebook

Stephen Spitalny

Stephen Spitalny on Twitter

Conscious Parenting: A guide to living with young children on Amazon
Speaking with the Young Child Through the Kindergarten Years

Wynstones Press

Adapted by Sharifa Oppenheimer from a story by Olive Beaupre Miller, My Book House, Vol. 1.

Join little Robin as he sets off on a journey to the palace to sing for the King.

We recommend this story for ages 2 to 7

To discover more about please visit wenurturecollective.com/stories-for-children

Today we are talking with Renita Livolsi about embracing our differences and how to cultivate inclusive communities in Waldorf Education.

Renita is the Director of Admissions at the San Francisco Waldorf High School. She is a Waldorf graduate and holds degrees in European History and Literature, French Language and Culture, Teaching English to English Language Learners, and a Juris Doctor degree! 

Renita is committed to Equity, Inclusion and Social Justice work and serves on Diversity, Equity and Inclusion committees at San Francisco Waldorf School. You can read more about the San Francisco Waldorf High School here.

• Introducing today’s Q&A topic: Tantrums - Nurturing ways to help your child.
• Why tantrums are normal.
• What tantrums actually mean and when they can manifest.
• What happens when we engage our children or contemplation or conversation.
• Finding a balance with your child and the way they use tantrums.
• Understanding the role of the parent and brain development.
• The prefrontal cortex and its purpose.
• Why rhythm is good for young children.
• Why healthy boundaries are necessary.
• Listening with compassion is a skill.
• Why empathy is a useful tool.

We Nurture Collective

We Nurture on Instagram

We Nurture on Facebook