How does a couple rebuild their relationship after betrayal?
What happens if you have kids or maybe your lives are completely intertwined? You're facing the impossible choice: do I stay or do I go? And choosing to stay and rebuild after infidelity is as valid and dignified as choosing to leave. And it takes real work.
In this episode, I walk you through what actually happens after betrayal: the crisis stage, the shame that isolates you, that intense re-bonding phase. We will dive into why that closeness after “re-bonding” can't be where you land. Real trust builds when you re-individuate, when there's separateness again, when your partner can tolerate disappointing you instead of being conflict-avoidant.
I share the resources that actually help (and when to use them), why this process takes years not months, and how to navigate the scary work of building a relationship that can tolerate honesty. If you're wondering how couples actually make it to the other side of betrayal, this one's for you.
So, if you also have a question about this or any other topic you can submit your anonymous relationship questions through our website: http://www.welcometobeingalive.com
Welcome to Being Alive is a podcast about the messy, beautiful, and occasionally heartbreaking world of relationships. Couples therapist, Inez Cordoba, LICSW, CST has spent thousands of hours helping couples and now gets to be in conversation with you.
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The show is brought to you by Cordoba Couples Therapy: www.cordobacouplestherapy.com
Sponsored by the Northampton Center for Couples Therapy, where loving well is an art, and getting there is a science. Visit http://www.northamptoncouplestherapy.com to learn more.
And a big thank you to From the Woods for our theme song: Apple Bottom Boogaloo. Check out: www.fromthewoodsmusic.com
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