I’d spend the summer of 1998 in chats dedicated to games, James Bond movies, baseball, and whatever else interested my ten-year-old mind. Each conversation was unique, but they always began the same way. I would say, “Hello.” And a strange somewhere across the world would respond, “a/s/l/. Age. Sex. Location.

“I am thirteen,” I’d explain. “Male, and from Missouri.” If they were my age, the conversation would continue. If they older, they’d disappear. As an adult, I now understand that while I was in AOL chats to talk about pop culture, a large chunk of the folks were just looking for digital hook-ups.

The range, scope, and prevalence of sex technology in 2015 makes the AOL chatrooms of 1997 seem quaint. Snapchat, Tinder, and even Facebook double as social networks, dating platforms, and subtle messaging systems for sexual missives.

This week, I invited sex tech consultant Lux Alptraum to explain the culture around digital sex, and how technology is influencing int

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