Sometimes, when our spouse does something unexpected or something we preferred they didn't do, we can get thrown off.  We may start to think something has gone terribly wrong.  And since our brain likes to be dramatic at times, this situation can create a little storm that starts to stir things up in a negative way.

If our spouse takes some time for some much needed self-care, like if they go fishing or motorcycle riding for the weekend, our brain will sometimes "horrible-ize" them, and make them out to be something they are not: selfish, inconsiderate, and mean... on purpose.  When we ask ourselves the question "What kind of spouse would do that?" it is often a sign that we are in this state of mind.

In today's episode, we will explore this topic in more detail, discussing what we can do about it when we get there.  And it will be important to realize that often when we are thinking something along these lines, that there can also be a masked component of jealousy, where we realize that we have not met our own self-care needs, and can feel both exhausted from not doing so and mad at ourselves that we haven't.