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Ep14 What…me stressed? Where is my oxygen mask?

Hello and Welcome to the Way of the Emotional Warrior Podcast. My name is Kai Ehnes and today we will be answering the question of What…me stressed?

Stress overload.

There are certainly times where the stress simply piles up and creates such an incredible pressure that you simply want to lose it. There simply don't seem to be enough hours to get the demands of those above you, met. They make decisions without any regard as to whether you can complete them or even have any ability to do the task. To be fair, sometimes those directly above you are getting slammed with a healthy dose of crazytown from a level higher than themselves. Trickle-down worked so well in the ‘80s, let’s just keep on using itJ

How can you be held accountable for something that you can not do because the internet meeting you are supposed to have at 10 does not happen because Zoom crashes or your internet is down. Yet, you were supposed to have it done. That is all before lunch and then come the next demands. You give 10 to 12 hours 7 days a week to a job that pays you for 37.5 hours.

So it is for many of us. You can't quit because you have built a life based on your salary and other jobs or careers are not easy substitutes. There must be something in your toolkit that you can use, right?

Before we can go there though there is plenty of time to stress out more. So we do it another day, maybe have a drink every evening, try to go to sleep and then find yourself not being able to get any rejuvenation. Next morning, coffee starts your day, your phone is blowing up, already stacked with new demands. At least you feel vindicated that your new office is your dining room table, couch, or even your bed. You put on your remote work uniform which is a nice shirt and sweat pants. Everyone does it and knows it but no one sees it on our new ZOOM screen frame of reality. That is your victory. Then the emails crank up. The ding sound followed by "you will." Quick, run for your third round of coffee. Damn did the dog get to go out?

Certainly this will lighten up tomorrow, is your mantra. In a moment of pause you ponder…Of course THEY don't want us this stressed. They don't want us to feel this way. They surely want us to be happy and fulfilled at the workplace.

But it just keeps going, day after day.

So what do you do? You have to look and dig deep inside.

For what you ask? Your humanity, your soul.

For me, I had to simply put everything on hold and spend some time with family. Realizing their honest and loving support allowed me to get out of my own way and get centered. I went outside and just practiced being present.

Next, Prioritizing became the next step.

Using the analogy of an oxygen mask on an airplane and that you would have to use it first in order to be able to help someone else, I realized it was time to grab my own oxygen mask. For me I practice coherence. I talked about this in the last episode. Heart-mind coherence is easy and fast. You breathe in 5 seconds and out 5 seconds. While you breathe you immerse yourself in the words: Gratitude, compassion, thanks, and Love. I word for each 10 second round. You quickly get your heart and mind to sync up.

Next comes the prioritizing piece. What actually is important. I use kaizen principles which means taking small steps towards a goal. Through continuous improvement which is what kaizen means, you make overall progress towards the larger goal one small step at a time.

Maybe things will work out in your job. Maybe they don't and you have to make some hard decisions. They key is to put yourself first. Of course there are family considerations and being a good person. You do have to put that oxygen mask on first though. If you don't you really can't be any good to anyone else.

Stress is part of your alert system. Reach out to others for help. If you never say anything and just bottle it up then no one can help. Also, be...