What the Lyric

Episode 6 - Party Anthems.  This episode Becky and Matthew talk about what makes a Party Anthem.  Is it the repetitive lyrics?  A good dance beat?  Or perhaps just a call to get drunk and rowdy.  One song is from the 1987 (guess who's pick that was) and the other song is from 2009.

 

                                                                               PARTY ANTHEMS

BECKY 0:07 

Welcome to what the lyric, the podcast that confirms Yeah, that actually made it to radio.

 

BECKY 0:22 

Well hello everybody welcome to what the lyric, today we're talking party anthems. Again I took that to mean any song that everyone will sing along to. Or like the end all be all karaoke because there's always those karaoke songs that everyone busts out or the end of the night the drunkies all sing together slurred speech and all

 

MATTHEW 0:50 

Now tell me what is your familiarity with parties slash karaoke?

 

BECKY 0:56 

Uh, not really karaoke so much but I have I've been to a number of parties in my day, mostly in my younger days. I don't do like the parties, you know, much.

 

MATTHEW 1:07

You don’t get swasted?

 

BECKY 1:09

Oh god, no. If I get wasted now it takes me like a week to recover. We went to go, a friend of mine and I went to go see a show. We each had one drink. The show is on a Thursday night when it was like a beer because we're not that kind of people. Show is on a Thursday night, we both walked into work the next day, and we're like, we should have taken today off.

 

BECKY 1:31 

That's how bad it was. So yeah,

 

MATTHEW 1:35 

Well, well done

 

BECKY 1:37 

 Back in the day. I did. I did boot and rally once.

 

MATTHEW 1:41 

No idea what that means.

 

BECKY 1:43 

Oh, so when you boot and rally means you've thrown up. And then you just get right back on the horse and start drinking again.

 

MATTHEW 1:50 

Oh, I see the horse boots ya and you rally,

 

BECKY 1:55 

You boot as in throw up and then you rally and you go back party. That was also the same time that I said, I could totally do a triathlon and then ended up doing having to do a triathlon. Not that same day, but like two years later I yeah.

 

MATTHEW 2:13 

That’s pretty rough.

 

BECKY 2:16 

Yeah, that was about 10 years ago.

 

MATTHEW 2:23 

Nope I’m not a party-er I’m a big old square generally. I just value sleep entirely too much. I love the taste alcohol. And like I'm a generally fun drunk, but my God, that for sleeping is like totally the worst. I'm trying to think of like the worst drunk I've ever been. Well, couple events.

 

BECKY 2:46 

I know. I was like, oh I got a few.

 

MATTHEW 2:49 

I think the dumbest one. I think the one that really encapsulates how I party may actually shape the song that I've chosen is the fact that I got horrifically drunk at Fourth of July like a couple of years ago, also is very stupid.

 

BECKY 3:04 

Please tell me Star Spangled Banner is your song?

 

MATTHEW 3:06 

Yes. No, it's what's the one that everyone has to listen to every Fourth of July. Born in the USA?

 

BECKY 3:13 

Yeah. Oh, fabulous.

 

MATTHEW 3:14

Born in the USA. But really what happened, I am incredibly pale. I lose water like nobody's business there was a rooftop party. They had no water, just alcohol. So for the entire day, I had no water and was only drinking alcohol until like midnight and I'm like, Why do I feel so ill? That's weird. Oh, I'm incredibly dehydrated. And you know, thank God, but I really, as I laid on that cold bathroom tile floor. I was like, I'm going to die here.

 

BECKY 3:50 

Ah, that was me with kidney stones. So I know is the cold floor. And I'm going to die here. But yes, I feel you.

 

BECKY 3:59 

 I feel very sane and I appreciate.

 

BECKY 4:02 

Similar pain Yeah.Oh God never kidney stones.

 

BECKY 4:09 

 I know I have gone last time so I’m very curious to know.

 

BECKY 4:15 

So I will say aside from the signing up for a triathlon drunk, the boot and rally drunk, probably the second most popular time is when I said we were in Australia. I'm totally naming my first kid after this club and the night we were there was kinky disco, which is now I have a cat by the name of kinky disco.

 

MATTHEW 4:39 

I had no idea.

 

BECKY 4:41 

You did not know that. Yes, I my I'd gone with a friend of mine who eventually became my roommate. And we, I had said, Oh my God, this place is so great. I'm totally naming my first kid after that, and then we got a cat, Jimbo. And then she said Jimbo was lonely. And somehow convinced me to go to one of those pet adoption things and then she said you can name it whatever you want. And she picked out Kinks original name was pumpkin. blech, well Yeah. And so we get her in the car and she goes, what are you going to name her? And I was like, you know what's coming and she said, “No I don't know.. oh shit.” and I went kinky disco. And so for roughly 16 years kinky disco has been and she's lived up to her name. So that's, that's probably the two times the two really good times I've been.

 

MATTHEW 5:41 

Then I cannot wait to know what song you chose based purely on the times that you've been schwasted.

 

BECKY 5:48 

So I picked I'm going to just start reading the lyrics it’s from eighty eight.

 

MATTHEW 5:54 

Oh, again preconception for me.

 

BECKY 5:56 

You might know it from the movie. It was in a movie

 

MATTHEW 6:00 

Would giving me the movie title give it away.

 

BECKY 6:02 

It might

 

MATTHEW 6:02 

 Okay then don’t

 

BECKY 6:03 

But you might have also not seen it because you're young enough where you might - Footloose which I saw so many times in theatre. When I wake up well, I know I'm going to be I'm going to be the man who wakes up next to you.

 

MATTHEW 6:18 

Yep. Now oh wait is it I forgot where the are there parentheses in the title?

 

BECKY 6:27 

there are.  When I go out yeah I know I'm going to be I'm going to be a man who goes along with you

 

MATTHEW 6:33 

The proclaimers

 

BECKY 6:34 

Yes

 

MATTHEW 6:36 

I'm like is it I’m gonna be in parentheses 500 miles. 

 

BECKY 6:37 

I'm going to be 500 miles Yeah, yeah. And I love this song mainly because it only came to me like at 5pm last night and we are recording at 3:30pm I was driving from doing my errands and this song came on and I first outing do when I wake up will I’m going to be I'm going to be the body's waked up a few because everyone does a shitty Scottish accent. And then

 

BECKY 7:09 

Once it gets to the chorus it's the but I would walk 500 miles, you know, however, I did every version of that accent through the entire song the whole drive home. I'm sure people were like what is happening in that car?

 

MATTHEW 7:29 

That woman is having a stroke

 

BECKY 7:32 

But I would walk 500 miles. I love it. I love that. I can't you can't not do it. I also again, I'm going to when I'm,  if I get drunk Well, I know I'm going to be the man who gets drunk next to you. You won’t . I'm going to say it right now. You won't. I don't even know what haver up is. I have to look that up. Peter. I wish I could call you right now, but that would be rude to ask what haver up is because I know,

 

MATTHEW 8:05 

He probably knows.

 

BECKY 8:06 

 I know he told me one time. And then you know he’d  walk 500 miles and he'd walked 500 more, just to be the man who'd walk 1000 miles. Why don't you just go with I would walk 1000 miles to be the man why’d you have to add the 500? Maybe because they were twins and there were two of them.

 

MATTHEW 8:27 

Ah, that's true. Or did they know that, was it Vanessa Carlton was going to come along with 1000 miles?

 

BECKY 8:34 

 I have some issue with that song. That’s a personal issue that can be discussed off mic. Yeah, I uh oh, god, it just that song in a song just makes me happy. Oh, it's talking, haver is talking foolishly or babbling. So if you're talking nonsense, I'm going to be the man talking nonsense next to you. You're Scottish I can't understand a lick of what you're saying anyways, so it doesn't really matter.

 

BECKY 9:10 

I also like that when he says to fall down at your door so he's walked 1000 miles

 

MATTHEW 9:16

and died

 

BECKY 9:17 

and then just dropped because walking 1000 miles is a is a good distance. But I also like that he says when I'm working Yeah, I know I'm going to be I'm going to be the man who's working hard for you. And when the money comes in for the work, I do all pass almost every penny on to you.

 

MATTHEW 9:40 

Okay, well that's just being smart.

 

BECKY 9:41 

 Just got to buy new shoes. If he's walking 500 miles you got to replace those things every so often.

 

MATTHEW 9:46 

I think that is reasonable...

 

BECKY 9:48 

Yep But I honestly, I spent the whole song doing But I would walk 500 miles. And I would walk 500 more. And then I would also duh duh duh da myself so the car doing a call repeat to myself so I'd be like duh duh duh da and then I kind of lean over a little bit further and be like duh duh duh da in my car while driving, so yes,

 

MATTHEW 10:27 

This one's going to be hard to rate just because it's like, I can't hate this song.

 

BECKY 10:31 

You can't cause everyone sings it. Everybody's going to wake up.

 

BECKY 10:36 

No I’m going to be, I’m gonna be the man next to you. It’s the way that they sing it. And I love it so much and every time that I hear it

 

MATTHEW 10:47 

I mean, there are some bad lyrics that I have just so much tremendous goodwill toward it.

 

BECKY 10:51 

It’s so it's so good. And then that the whole head bob thing. They're like chickens pecking at the ground the way they're

 

MATTHEW 10:59 

Like Scottish

 

BECKY 11:00 

Just furiously moving their necks and no, maybe it's a Scottish thing. I don't know.

 

MATTHEW 11:06 

One can assume.

 

BECKY 11:07 

Oh my god, I just it makes me happy.

 

MATTHEW 11:12 

I love that pick.

 

BECKY 11:14 

I also like, I just saw this one and if I grow old and then in parentheses, apparently the other brothers correcting the one when I grow old.

 

MATTHEW 11:23 

Oh, wow.

 

BECKY 11:24 

Well I know I'm going to be I'm going to be the man who's growing old with you. Cute.

 

MATTHEW 11:29 

Yeah, but he's going to die by the time he gets there.

 

BECKY 11:31 

 I know he's fall down at your door. Uh, yeah. duh duh duh da

 

BECKY 11:39 

You know, if you were to just yell that out the window. Somebody else would be like duh duh duh da

 

MATTHEW 11:46 

They think they're a wedding. They feel like for whatever reason. Oh, yeah, this is another wedding song.

 

BECKY 11:52 

This is Benny. This is from Benny in June. That's where I remember seeing it. When it became really big. I bet you also if I yelled when I wake up

 

MATTHEW 11:53

Oh yeah,

 

BECKY 11:57

somebody else would be like, Well, I know I'm going to be. Yeah. Well, I know I'm going to be I'm going to be the man who wakes up next to you.

 

MATTHEW 12:11 

Oh, that's phenomenal.

 

BECKY 12:13 

That’s why I'm not an actor. I can't do accents at all

 

MATTHEW 12:16 

I disagree. I think that's one hell of an accent.

 

BECKY 12:22 

But I would walk … All comes from back in the throat.

 

MATTHEW 12:25 

I think the Scots would be inclined to agree.

 

BECKY 12:29 

It's almost like I'm about to throw up but I'm choking it back.

 

MATTHEW 12:34 

From all the drinking you did.

 

BECKY 12:36 

Yeah. And if I haver up, which I would assume is throw up but apparently it's talked gibberish.

 

MATTHEW 12:46 

Not as well don't. Well, but if you haver up, doesn't that mean that you're

 

BECKY 12:53 

Drunk?

 

MATTHEW 12:54 

Yeah, I was like, you're just spewing nonsense. I was like, that just sounds like you drunk.

 

BECKY 12:59 

He already starting with the drunk he's said when I wake up and then when he goes out,

 

MATTHEW 13:04 

Oh yeah,

 

BECKY 13:05 

 I'm going to be drunk and then he's haver and

 

MATTHEW 13:08 

I mean that makes sense is a logical progression.

 

BECKY 13:10 

It was I mean they at least work that one out pretty good yeah da da dun da da dun da dun dun dun dun dun

 

MATTHEW 13:17 

I would, I give this a four. If I was like the least this is a four. You didn't try but then again my god you didn't need to.  you have solved…

 

BECKY 13:30 

It’s really right there because everyone does this shitty Scottish accent but is nothing like these guys. Maybe this is my Halloween costume.

 

MATTHEW 13:39

Oh please do.

 

Last year's was hard to be beat. Oh, oh, I could probably I could figure it out. I mean, I did big ang last year. That's a tough one to beat. Yeah, I don't have to. I would have to answer the phone at work. That accent? When I wake up.  I can't even do it. I got to listen to them sing it.

 

MATTHEW 14:06 

You can do it to the beat.

 

BECKY 14:07 

 And only do it to this song. That would be hilarious. Can I help you - duh duh duh da?

 

MATTHEW 14:15 

And the other person's like, yes duh duh duh da.

 

BECKY 14:18 

I will only help you if you can answer this duh duh duh da

 

MATTHEW 14:23 

Here's a riddle when I wake up, and they just pause and wait for them to see a can answer.

 

BECKY 14:29 

Well, I know I'm going to be?  I can't help you. I cannot help you. If you don't get this duh duh duh da Click.

 

MATTHEW 14:39 

That'll have to be a ringtone.

 

BECKY 14:40 

Oh my god. It might I might make it my ringtone now cut I honestly entertained myself for I don't know the songs. What? Three and a half minutes.

 

MATTHEW 14:50 

Oh, well, it's perfect. It's also an I don't know if this is a decent segue, but this it will be a segue nonetheleast. I see the repetition between ours is like a good match. Yeah. And what is slightly infuriating is like last time did MacArthur Park broke out of the 2008? Till, like, 2008 streak back in 2009.

 

 

BECKY 15:10 

Oh, right. Okay.

 

MATTHEW 15:11 

Very slight distinction.

 

BECKY 15:20 

All right. Well, I broke out of the me to movement.

 

MATTHEW 15:23 

That is true.

 

BECKY 15:25 

I mean, he just got drunk and was little, like, was a little stalker-y

 

MATTHEW 15:27 

but that maybe they were in a long term relationship and already ready. He doesn't have any miles. he did walk there.

 

BECKY 15:36 

That could be it.

 

MATTHEW 15:37 

 So I chose one. And the title is the chorus. And its one word, which I feel like is unfair, and potentially too many clues. But I've tried to find lyrics that are not

 

BECKY 15:52 

2009

 

MATTHEW 15:53

Yeah.

 

BECKY 15:55 

 Is that a band or just a singer?

 

MATTHEW 15:57 

Band?

 

BECKY 15:58 

Okay. All right.

 

MATTHEW 16:01 

And featuring someone but honestly I didn't realize who is featuring. It starts off with if you not drunk ladies and gentlemen get ready to get fucked up.

 

BECKY 16:13 

2009?

 

MATTHEW 16:16 

Yes, and I can't say the next line because includes the band's name

 

BECKY 16:18 

okay?

 

MATTHEW 16:19 

But the person who's featuring his little john so then they say, you know what, lil’ john Yeah.

 

BECKY 16:27 

Get down for what is it that like turned out for what? No.

 

MATTHEW 16:32 

No,  All of the alcoholics were you at let's go

 

BECKY 16:38 

Oh so good so far

 

MATTHEW 16:40 

right? So it's fantastic. When I walk in the club, all eyes on me. I'm with the party rock crew.

 

BECKY 16:48

Oh, is it the...

 

MATTHEW 16:50 

All drinks are free

 

BECKY 16:51 

It the father son duo a… Why can't I think of the name of them?

 

MATTHEW 16:57 

 I don't think their father son.

 

BECKY 17:00 

 Oh god, why can't I think of who they are? They had the party anthem Song.

 

MATTHEW 16:57 

Yes.

 

BECKY 17:00 

Sexy and you know it? Yeah, it’s a father song I believe.

 

MATTHEW 17:11 

Are you serious?

 

BECKY 17:12 

I will look it up while you're while you're continuing.

 

MATTHEW 17:14

You're correct. It is LMFAO,

 

BECKY 17:15

yep.

 

MATTHEW 17:18 

And what I thought about going with, Party Rock Anthem, but I was like, No, no, if we're talking party rock anthems or party anthems, that's just too That's too on the nose. So I went with the one that goes Shot shot shot shots shot shot shots. Yeah.

 

BECKY 17:38 

Oh, it's an uncle and a nephew.

 

MATTHEW 17:41

Okay, well, that's basically

 

 BECKY 17:42 

a little better. Yeah. Yeah.

 

MATTHEW 17:45 

And I mean, it is a party song everyone's trying to get wasted.

 

BECKY 17:50

Oh, yeah

 

MATTHEW 17:51 

everyone, easily you sing along party for your drunk. All you have to do is yell there are no music to it. You just yell shot, shot, shot, shot, shot, and shot, shot.

 

BECKY 18:00 

 I also like when I called them up the first photo is the one guy's wearing a shirt that says I'm in Miami bitch. But then it says performing in Fort Wayne, Indiana.

 

MATTHEW 18:11 

You know what's to say? Like dress for the job you want? Yeah, for the job.

 

BECKY 18:15 

Here we go.

 

MATTHEW 18:16 

He wants to be in Miami.

 

BECKY 18:17 

Oh my god. Yeah.

 

BECKY 18:19 

 Probably.

 

BECKY 18:20 

Oh my god. Yeah. Who else was in this who?

 

MATTHEW 18:23 

Well, little john is featured but I just love that. Like they lean in hard to all this. all of the alcoholics Where are you at? They know their audience got to love that. And also, they're already saying like, even if you're not an alcoholic, if you're not drunk, ladies and gentlemen, get ready to get fucked up. And I'm like,

 

BECKY 18:41 

Yeah, this is happening.

 

MATTHEW 18:43 

All drinks are free with the party rock crew, which I'm like, that’s very kind of you. Then they go into the first round of shots, shots. Shots, so, perfect. But then it starts to get you know where Becky didn't Wade into the me to movement. Yeah, this one certainly does because the next round says are you ready? Are you ready? Oh, they stopped us for us. Okay,

 

BECKY 19:13 

Thank you Seattle PD.

 

MATTHEW 19:17 

The ladies...

 

BECKY 19:18 

Probably arresting someone outside the building. It’s fine.

 

MATTHEW 19:20 

They're already here. The ladies love us when we pour shots and I was like, Yeah, they're for free. That's fine. They need an excuse to suck our cocks

 

BECKY 19:37 

also probably true. I was like

Can I just say me, written with his nephew? That's all I'm saying. Like

 

MATTHEW 19:43 

That really changes the song for me. Well, actually, I mean, yeah, honestly, I didn't realize that was lyric. So this is this was a transformative experience for me. Because I'm like, they need an excuse to suck our cocks and I was like I don't know many men, but I don't think there was there ever is a man who needs an excuse from one to be like, Can I suck your dick?I think that if...

 

BECKY 20:14 

I won't I don't know anyone who turned that down.

 

MATTHEW 20:16 

Straight forward was like, hey, put this out here,

 

BECKY 20:20 

Like a little attraction maybe didn't have to be fully attracted to you may be like, yeah, okay,

 

MATTHEW 20:26 

Fair. Yeah, I'll take it anyway,

 

BECKY 20:28 

You’re right. Yep. Sure.

 

MATTHEW 20:30 

But then they don't answer whether or not they accept it. They just say we came to get drunk. How about you? I'm like, ooh, well, all are drunk. Why are you giving them...?

 

BECKY 20:40 

Probably safe to assume accepted. I’m just saying.

 

MATTHEW 20:43 

I think that's

 

BECKY 20:44 

Safe to assume

 

MATTHEW 20:45 

Accurate

 

BECKY 20:46 

Yeah.

 

MATTHEW 20:46 

Ah. And then it's so you know, now where am I alcoholics Let me see a hands up and I was like, fair, anyone who's here probably schwasted particularly if it's at a wedding

 

BECKY 20:58 

And then this way, they can pick their pockets. to pay for the booze

 

MATTHEW 21:03 

Oh, absolutely. Oh, wait, also. I mean, it's more just like I love giving people drinks and like, that's a very sweet sentence.

 

BECKY 21:12

Yeah.  That’s lovely of you.

 

MATTHEW 21:13 

Also benefit oral from them being wasted. Yeah, which is uncomfortable. And then even worse, but very much on par is that the women come around every time I'm pouring. Well, that just seems accurate. I'd want a free drink. Their panties hit the ground every time I give them shots.

 

BECKY 21:34 

It could just be that by some weird kind of odd universe thing. That that's the only place that elastic just breaks and like that’s why  their panties. Like the trees of mystery, or you go to one of those places. Yeah. Yeah, maybe that's what it is. It's like the club version of like, the trees of mystery. That's the only place where everyone's like elastic breaks in there. Yeah,

 

MATTHEW 22:06 

 Which I think it's true. And then you know, it. Shots I thought it was just an up heart like upbeat song about people wanting to get drunk. I think that's true. But then the final some of the final lines are now Sam fucked up and then responses. I'm fucked up. Fantastic. But then they're saying, I'm fucked up. I and then response I'm fucked up. So you're like I get I get the gist here and then they say I'm trying to fuck. Everyone responds I'm trying to fuck. I'm trying to fuck. I'm trying to fuck.

 

BECKY 22:42 

So you picked the me to movement song

 

MATTHEW 22:45 

I did. I Sheryl Sandberg’d it? Where was she the one who leaned in?

 

BECKY 22:48 

 I can't remember.

 

MATTHEW 22:50 

I think its Sandberg San something. It's a Sheryl. It's not the one who wrote into the wild or whatever. Oh,

 

BECKY 23:01 

Yeah, see, they're calling response isn't nearly as good as duh duh duh da .

 

 MATTHEW 23.10 

Yeah, no, I'm inclined agree with you.

 

 BECKY 23:12 

you can get better than duh duh duh da or a really awful Scottish accent.

 

MATTHEW 23:15 

But I would argue that if outside this one day you were to yell Shots, shots, shots.

 

BECKY 23:19 

Oh, yeah. Especially outside this window, because there's a bar right downstairs.

 

MATTHEW 23:24 

Everyone would can either chime in, or when you stop them go everybody.

 

BECKY 23:31 

Yeah. Yeah.

 

BECKY 23:33 

But again, there is a bar downstairs

 

MATTHEW 23:36 

It’s a biased sample.

 

BECKY 23:37 

Yeah. Yeah, I bet you we probably could. I bet you. Yeah. Yeah,

 

MATTHEW 23:43 

 That’s what I'm thinking. So I mean...

 

BECKY 23:46 

 I think we're both equally good. I say mine's more a little bit on the fun, wholesome side of things. So it's less on the yuck scale for me.

 

MATTHEW 23:58 

I agree. I mean, there both probably I would even bump mine to a three.

 

BECKY 24:05 

Yeah,

 

MATTHEW 24:05 

It’s it. It cannot be a four. Yeah, I'm trying to fuck and also women need an excuse to suck my cock.

 

BECKY 24:13 

 I think what makes mine on the yuck scale is the people who sing along like I did with the shitty shitty accent along with it. So the I would walk 500 miles and I would walk that makes it shitty? or yucky, but really, it makes it a whole lot fun. So I would say this is like a one depending on which drunk tries to do there

 

MATTHEW 24:47 

Oh wait...

 

BECKY 24:48 

There accent

 

MATTHEW 24:49 

As our scale change,

 

BECKY 24:50 

I can't remember now where I'm with. It's low. It's a low Yeah, factor.

 

MATTHEW 24:57 

Like Yeah, low Yikes. Lower Yeah.

 

BECKY 25:01 

Yikes Yeah. Oh my god.

 

MATTHEW 25:04 

We haven't had caffeine okay. Yeah, that's

 

BECKY 25:06 

That’s exactly what's happened I just realized I have not had caffeine all day. Geez No wonder.

 

MATTHEW 25:12 

How are you alive? It's nearly 4pm

 

BECKY 25:15 

Considering at work I drink death wish coffee. It is difficult.

 

MATTHEW 25:22 

You're going to crash at 6pm.

 

BECKY 25:24 

I probably will in the middle of that opera.

 

BECKY 25:27 

Please watch it please watch....

 

BECKY 25:28 

 Paris Hilton.

 

BECKY 25:31 

Yeah, uh, yeah. Oh my god. That's why I was like, why am I yawning? No death wish.

 

BECKY 25:39 

Oh death wish coffee. If you want to sponsor us too, I'd really appreciate that. Oh, because I tots love your coffee. And I'm from the same area. So let's chat death wish

 

SPEAKER  25:53 

Give us a call. You don't know our number. But you know our website.

 

BECKY 25:56 

You've got the website, which is whatthelyric.com

 

MATTHEW 26:02 

Fantastic Yeah,

 

BECKY 26:03 

Now do we know do we know what...?

 

BECKY 26:05 

 I can't remember what it was next time? That's awful

 

MATTHEW 26:10 

So TB TBD

 

BECKY 26:12

I left the house clearly no death wish Coffee, no headphones,  I don't even know what happened how I got here .Yeah, so......

 

MATTHEW 26:22 

We’re hoping you're not having a collective stroke like we are but

 

BECKY 26:25 

You might be

 

MATTHEW 26:26 

But if you are hopefully you're enjoying it. We will have more episodes to come.

 

BECKY 26:31 

 I think we have what three left that we decided.

 

MATTHEW 26:35 

Yes.

 

BECKY 26:35 

Oh boy.

 

MATTHEW 26:36 

 Let's take a look. Well we'll post it on the web.

 

BECKY 26:39 

Yes. Well I’ll all up? I still have to put the picture up of the rock aka.

 

MATTHEW 26:45 

I did look that up and can confirm it is you’re....

 

BECKY 26:51 

Yeah. I almost want to shout out to the rock and say are you guys related?  Could you confirm or deny Please.

 

MATTHEW 27:01 

 I think he'd appreciate it. If he ever saw....

 

BECKY 27:02 

 I think he went to he seems like a guy's got a good sense of humour about himself. I mean, you'd have to if you work for the WWE/F, whatever they are now, says the girl who went when one year for Valentine's Day. So amazing. It was the best Valentine's Day I've ever had. So that has to tell you about my dating life. And I was not seeing anyone at the time. My friend Ken took me. Thank you, Ken. You are the best ever. Yeah, we had seats that were like two rows back from the actual ring.Epic.

 

MATTHEW 27:36 

 That is phenomenal.

 

BECKY 27:38 

 It was amazing. I yeah. Again, haven't had a better Valentine's Day.

 

MATTHEW 27:45 

And never will. And would argue that you can't top up.

 

BECKY 27:49 

Now. You really can't. It's

 

BECKY 27:51 

It was your top.

 

BECKY 27:54 

Yeah. And on that note,

 

MATTHEW 27:56 

Well, thank you all.

 

BECKY 27:58 

We will talk to you again. Soon

 

Episode 5 - Podcasters Choice - Anything goes on this edition of What the Lyric. Becky and Matthew choose their favorite bad lyrics from any decade and and genre. One is from 2016 and the other is from 1978. Who will be victorious?

Podcasters Choice

 

[Start 00:00:00]

 

[Music playing 00:00:06]

 

Becky: Welcome. To What he Lyric? the podcast that confirms, yeah, that actually made it to radio.

 

Hello and welcome to What the Lyric? Today and What the Lyric? podcasters choice, we pick apart whatever song we want, it's a free for all. And I have picked something recent.

 

Matthew: Oh.

 

Becky: I think it still fits into the me-too movement theme I got going on.

 

Matthew: I do have to ask first though. Most hated bands…

 

Becky: These guys.

 

Matthew: Across the board…

 

Becky: Yes.

 

Matthew: Do not tell me yet. But any others like…

 

Becky: These guys.

 

Matthew: Was it an easy choice for you to make?

 

Becky: Yes. It was so… The first song that James Arthur, horrific train wreck of a wedding song that people are using. That one and I think this one are the reason that this podcast exists.

 

Matthew: Wow.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: There was no other song. That popped into your head?

 

Becky: Nope. This one. I was like and this is it. There are a couple others. That I thought of because they were funny, but I was like, no, I hate this one immensely. Like. So much, so much

 

Matthew: Fascinating. See! Mine was less generated by hatred and more confusion. Because I do have… This is again a favourite song of mine.

 

Becky: Kind of how bizarre confusion?

 

Matthew: Yes.

 

Becky: Okay.

 

Matthew: It is precisely how bizarre. I think everyone has heard the song and everyone has been like the fuck. I am excited to get into that.

 

Becky: Then I am going to let you go first, because…

 

Matthew: Really?

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: End on the hatred note but start with confusion.

 

Becky: I have got a heavy dissertation going on over here.

 

Matthew: I mean, it is going to take, you no time to get…

 

Becky: Okay.

 

Matthew: What this song is. I am trying to think. Let me find. Oh, the songwriter is Jimmy Webb. And you know what…

 

Becky: Jimmy Webb?

 

Matthew: You’re going to have to think of more of the 70s. This is coming out of the 70s. I am breaking my millennial streak and also my 2008 streak.

 

Becky: Does it have to do with pina colada?

 

Matthew: It does not, although that is a fantastic song and I will not hear a word about those lyrics. I am going to skip the part where the song title is. Well, let's just start at the beginning. Spring was never waiting for us, dear. It ran one-step ahead as we followed in the dance.

Blank is melting in the dark. There is your first clue.

 

Becky: Is this MacArthur Park?

 

Matthew: Yes, and I…

 

Becky: And I can't tell you how much I love this song for craziness of it.

 

Matthew: Right, but precisely right. If you look at the lyrics and this is a fantastic song by Donna Summer.

 

Becky: Oh, no. It is not, have you read the history of this?

 

Matthew: I have read a part of it. I don't know all of it. I love the Donna Summer version.

 

Becky: Oh, that is the classic. That one. Yes. Then Anthony Clark, a comedian, did a version. Well, he did a part about this song and his bit, which always made me giggle.  We used to play this at work, I looked it up, and there was somebody that did a cover of it. That we then spent a good half an hour trying to find so that we could play it. Now I get to look it up. But yes, MacArthur Park, genius.

 

Matthew: So I already knew off the bat, like, this is going to be low on the yikes scale. because…

 

Becky: Oh, it is so good.

 

Matthew: It is a phenomenal song if you have not heard it. But again, the entire thing is about MacArthur Park.

 

Becky: Cake out in the rain.

 

Matthew: And supposedly, it is supposed to be about the park because it says MacArthur's park is melting in the dark.

 

Becky: Yep.

 

Matthew: All the sweet green icing flowing down, presumably foliage.

 

Becky: Yep.

 

Matthew: And then it just goes off the fucking rails and it is like someone left the cake out in the rain. I don't think that I can take it. Cause it took so long to bake it.

 

Becky: Oh, my God.

 

Matthew: And I will never have that…

 

Becky: Here is when I hear the disco [Making noise 00:4:48] noise, yeah.

 

Matthew: There is so much going on in the song and this person is lamenting it took so long to bake it and I will never have that recipe again. And the series of oh no. Like you cannot describe the depth of emotion captured by that no.

 

Becky: So good. It is so good. And it's a seven minute long song. Also my favourite, it was Waylon Jennings.

Matthew: I did not know Waylon Jennings.

 

Becky: Including a 1969 Grammy winning version by Waylon Jennings. And you can hear how pissed off he was singing that. Like he's fuckin lyrics don't mean shit. He was probably drunk or stone or whatever.

 

Matthew: [Inaudible 00:5:30]

 

Becky: Yeah. Oh, amazing. Waylon Jennings, Grammy won a Grammy.

 

Matthew: Did not know that. Also, I apologize, it was not in the 70s but it was in the 60s.

 

Becky: Yeah, 69. Yeah. I had to look it up.

 

Matthew: General area.

 

Becky: 68 was when it was first recorded. But you were close. It is a known area for the Donna Summer one.

 

Matthew: Right.

 

Becky: My mom had that album by the way.

 

Matthew: I mean it is phenomenal. And the thing is, there aren't many lyrics here. And I would argue that none of them are terrible. It is just so fucking weird. Like I recall the yellow cotton dress. Okay, that makes sense presumably someone wearing it, foaming like a wave. That makes absolutely no sense. And the ground beneath your knees, even less sense. Like how do you track and create lyrics that make absolute zero sense when you take three sentences together.

 

Becky: Let's be honest. Late 60s, the whole summer of love coming up soon.

 

Matthew: Wholesome non-drug usage

 

Becky: Probably a lot of drugs happening. Why is there a cake reference? What the whole cake reference?

Matthew: Like looks at a park and says, you know, I really want to go to the cake.

 

Becky: It looks like a cake.

 

Matthew: Everything that I walk around this park screams cake.

 

Becky: I have never had a park look like a cake. Yeah,

 

Matthew: I would want to go the park more if it did.

 

Becky: That's again, that's an acid trip. And I may or may not have seen things that looked unlike that.

 

Matthew: It’s just like so weird because someone… Interesting fact, though, if you look at the lyrics, the first time you hear about the cake. It says someone left the cake out in the rain. She says it again; someone left the cake out in the rain. A little bit later on the song, the final stanza…

 

Becky: Does it becomes her cake?

 

Matthew: It does. It said someone left my cake out in the rain. And I don't think that I can take it because it took so long to bake it. And I'll never have that recipe again.

 

Becky: I will tell you what. After the whole cake off that we had at work, I understand that layer…  

 

Matthew: There was a cake off?

 

Becky: We had the cake off. The Halloween theme, Friday the 13th, cake off.

 

Matthew: Well, we should clarify that this cake off was not for October Friday the 13th. It was a September Friday.

 

Becky: Yeah it was September, Friday 13th, a Halloween. It was more horror Friday 13th inspired cake off that we did it work. And yeah, I get that. I get that. The It cake I did was rough. I will never do that one again. And I hope I never remember that recipe because it did take so long to bake it.

 

Matthew: And you will never do that recipe again.

 

Becky: And I will never do that recipe again. Yeah. So yeah, I get it. I understand where she's coming from on that. I mean, I get it. I am with her.

 

Matthew: I know. All of them get it. I mean I personally don't understand the analogy of a park to a cake.

 

Becky: So good.

 

Matthew: The emotion in it, regardless of how…

 

Becky: She is good.

 

Matthew: batshit crazy the lyric are.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: I honestly give this zero yikes. Because it is, weird but I just wanted to bring it because it is a favourite song.

 

Becky: It is so good.

 

Matthew: And it make so a little sense.

 

Becky: Yeah. It makes no sense whatsoever. It is so good. So good. All right. So mine.

 

Matthew: Who do you hate? Oh, it might be recent. I might get it.

 

Becky: It is from 2016.

 

Matthew: Ariana Grande?

 

Becky: Oh, no, it’s a group and then another singer. These guys are known also for being producers, but they do all these collabs, as the kids say. And this was the first time that I heard them. At first I was like, well, this is kind of bland. Then I start listening to lyrics and I wanted to punch them in the face.

 

Matthew: I am intrigued.

 

Becky: Okay let me read some of the lyrics. Here is how it starts. Hey, I was doing just fine before I met you. I drink too much and that is an issue, but I am okay. No. hey! tell your friends it was nice to meet them, but I hope I never see them again. I know it breaks your heart. Moved to the city in a broke down car. In 4 years, no calls. Now you are looking pretty in a hotel bar.

And I can't stop. No, I can't stop.

 

Matthew: I remember vaguely the song and I would not remember it if I had not heard you. Months ago talking about how much you hate this band.

 

Becky: Eviscerate this band. Yeah.

 

Matthew: I forget what the song is called, but is it The Chainsmokers?

 

Becky: Oh, it is.

 

Both Speakers: And Halsey.

 

Matthew: That is it.

 

Becky: I necessarily have issue with Halsey. I have a lot of issues with the fucking Chainsmokers. First off, let us just start with. I drink too much and that is an issue, but I am okay. No, clearly you are not. This is what AA is.

 

Matthew: I have issue but I am okay.

 

Becky: I'm okay. No, it is intervention time. Then like he sees you looking pretty good in a hotel bar? This is the dude that broke up with you because you got fat. Then comes back and is like, whoa! Somebody lost some weight. And wants to get back in on it. No, and then it goes in to baby pull me closer in the backseat of your rover that I know you can't afford. Come on. You don't know that. You have been away from her for four years. She could be doing well because  she did not have that frickin rock of an ex hanging around her.

 

Matthew: Dragging her down.

 

Becky: Yeah. Pull the sheets right off the corner of the mattress you stole from the roommate back in Boulder. There are several issues here. First off, bed bugs.

 

Matthew: Absolutely riddled with them. There is no way she is not.

 

Becky: God knows what else is on that mattress. Or has been on that mattress. There is not enough steam cleaning. or defogging or what you do with a mattress to kill anything that is on it. You should have just left that out in the backyard or on the side of the street somehow. No, gross. So gross. I can’t even.  How is that a lyric in a song way?

 

Matthew: Wait, pause because technically wait. Not only bed bugs would be a concern, but she…

 

Both Speakers: Stole it.

 

Becky: From her roommate.

 

Matthew: Yeah, at what point…

 

Becky: We don’t know.

 

Matthew: Did she just decide to up and leave while the like roommate was at work. Oh, shit this is a nice like Caspar mattress. Caspar if you would like to sponsor this podcast.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Please contact us.

 

Becky: I picture like the tablecloth trick. Roommate sleeping whip the mattress out from underneath there. Drops 0n the box spring and runs.

 

Matthew: Done, love it.

 

Becky: That is what I am picturing. Gross, cooties. You don't know what that roommate's done on that mattress. What if that roommate blacked out, drunk, peed on the bed or…

 

Matthew: Worse?

 

Becky: Worse or, you know, maybe…

 

Matthew: There are so many imagination.

 

Becky: There is so, many fluids that could be on that bed.

 

Matthew: And likely are.

 

Becky: Again, not enough steam cleaning or de-fogging or whatever you could do.

                                     

Matthew: When they say get a new mattress every eight years, they mean get a new mattress from the factory, not a new mattress to you. So don't steal your roommates mattress.

 

Becky: Yeah and no amount of mattress bag or pads could get me further away. I am like the princess and the pea. I would be like, I still now that there is pee there.

 

Matthew: Wow! Again, well done.

 

Becky: Yeah. Then he just like we ain’t ever getting older. You are, you are, you are, you turd, you are, you are. I can't stand these guys. Then now all of a sudden he is like, you look as good as the day I met you. I forgot just why I left you. Cause you are a turd. I think we have established you are an alcoholic turd. Because you have a drinking problem, but you are okay with it. The first reason to leave the guy, I don't know why you even went back. I mean, granted, maybe your whole revenge plot was the mattress did have some sort of cooties and you put him down there first was like, I will be right back.

 

Matthew: Good lie.

Becky: While all the bugs jump on him.

 

Matthew: Abandon ship.

 

Becky: Yeah, I mean, I can't. I would not. Then he says, stay and play that Blink-182 song, right there

 

Matthew: Yeah, which is it...That one?

 

Becky: I’m out.  Blink-182. Are we that old?

 

Matthew: Wait, which one is it?

 

Becky: Blink-182. There is so many. Oh, it's the one that they beat to death in Tucson. Did they beat the Blink-182 to death?

 

Matthew: Blink-182 death.

 

Becky: Then it just goes the course. I know I broke your heart. I know it breaks your heart. Moved to a city in a broke down car and four years later didn't call. I don't know why? Why?

 

Matthew: This go back into your craw.

 

Becky: I was like, what the…This is bull shit. You don't know I can't afford a Rover. I am paying for your sad ass. And not four years later I've been able to save up for a Rover and then bite the tattoo on your shoulder. No, you ain’t touching me.

 

Matthew: Gross don't?

 

Becky: Get your get your shit away. Get your…

 

Matthew: Bed bug infested.

 

Becky: You need to get back to the hole. Just get on track. Now I am looking pretty in a hotel bar.

 

Matthew: Wait, he is saying that?

 

Becky: That is her singing it now.

 

Matthew: Oh, yikes.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: No.

 

Becky: I mean. I am sure you are Halsey. You are a good looking gal. But…And I and I can't stop. No, I can't stop. Yeah. It is called self-control.

 

Matthew: Yeah. No, I have…

 

Becky: I can’t stand this, I can’t… everything.

 

Matthew: What I love about this. Going back to the we ain't ever getting older because I'm like, wait. You already admitting you have a drinking problem. So like, that is for sure. Aging your liver.

 

Becky: You are going to get aged quick.

 

Matthew: But your band is The Chainsmokers. Yeah, like all are 100 percent getting old just because you are going to die young. Does that mean you are not getting older?

 

Becky: Yeah. Then they have a collab with Coldplay that I just hear everywhere. Is that I want something just like this. Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo. I can't.

 

Mathew: Oh, I never heard it.

 

Becky: Oh, you have.

 

Matthew: Have I?

 

Becky: You have. Yeah, it is fucking everywhere. That one, they have another one, and I was like, oh, this sounds like…oh it is The Chainsmokers. This feeling maybe. I don't know. I can't. They just need to stop. They need to really take stock of what, the hell they are doing. I am sure they are great producers. I don't give a shit. Just don't sing anymore. Don't write any more lyrics. Just produce the music. Be happy with making that money. You are good looking guys. You get whatever you want.

 

Matthew: You will be fine.

 

Becky: You will be giving the ladies. It is not a big deal. Just stop singing and putting out this piece of crap.

 

Matthew: Now the question I have. Is, how many yikes you assigning it? One is the worst. Are you going for one?

 

Becky: There are a big fat one for me, across the board. You could go, hey, The Chainsmokers. Nope. one. I don't like it. I don't like it. They could do something with Pavarotti. And I'm still like, no. They could bring Elvis back from the dead. And I will still say, no. Beatles back from the dead. Nope, nothing. There is nothing. Yeah.

 

Matthew: What, if they cured cancer?

 

Becky: Maybe

 

Matthew: That is hard maybe.

 

Becky: Maybe if they cured cancer and never recorded again…

 

Matthew: Deal.

 

Becky: I would pump it up to two. But they won't stop producing crap.

 

Matthew: No.

 

Becky: It is in their blood now. They have had like two or three hits. So now they're like, yeah,

 

Matthew: We are band.

 

Becky: We fucking rock. Everything we touch turns to gold bitches. Yeah. No.

 

Matthew: Yikes.

 

Becky: I hate them. I hate them. Oh, my God, they make my skin crawl. I hate so much.

 

Matthew: It is important to have that. I was like, okay, this is good, you know. James Arthur,

 

Becky: James Arthur and The Chainsmokers.

 

Matthew: Wait for that collab. When that does inevitably happen. We will have to talk about it here.

 

Becky: Oh, it is going to happen. You know it is going to happen.

 

Matthew: If it has not already.

 

Becky: The sweet, sweet dulcet tones of James Arthur followed by the. I don't even know what the producing style of the…

 

Matthew: The Chainsmokers

 

Becky: The Chainsmokers.

 

Matthew: We know that there singing style will be slurred because both of them have drinking problem.

 

Becky: Yes. It is all about alcohol, and I am pretty sure it'll take forever because I have to keep stopping for a smoke break, run out side. Then come back in and be like, all right, let's do it.

 

Matthew: Ah, the wheeze.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Just wait for the smokers hack.

 

Becky: Before, okay. Let me just clears out. [Making coughing hacking sound 00:19:20] All right I am ready, and then…

 

Both speakers:  That is the dulcet of James Arthur.

 

Becky: Yeah. Oh, yeah.

 

Matthew: Wow! Cause there, you know. Puff, huffing and puffing.

 

Becky: I am trying to think. They don't even really singing that song. It is like doing just fine before. Like mumbling of, yeah.

 

Matthew: [Inaudible 00:19:40-45]

 

Becky: Yeah. It is like a teenager who's doesn't want to talk to his parents. That is what it is like. That is how they sound to me.

 

Matthew: They just get close to the microphone [Inaudible 00:19:57].

 

Becky: I am pretty sure that's how they do it.

 

Matthew: You know the mumblers.

 

Becky: Yeah. Oh my God. Oh…

 

Matthew: Mumble core.

 

Becky: I dislike…the mattress you stole from…What is wrong with you people? Have we not heard of hygiene? I mean.

 

Matthew: They, no.

 

Becky: Bleach? anything. Please, dear God.

 

Matthew: You have the money. Please buy a new mattress.

 

Becky: Yeah. You could buy 50 or 40, however.

 

Matthew: I think we should make several pleas here. The first is please send us pizza or cake whenever you so desire. Check out the Website.

 

Becky: Oh, yes.

 

Matthew: whatthelyrics.com.

 

Becky: Nice one. I am glad you pulled that one because I didn’t. I was not even thinking about it.

 

Matthew: And specifically, we are going to make a plead directly to The Chainsmokers to use their money, put their money to good use and buy a new mattress. You deserve it, Casper mattresses.

 

Becky: Just buy a new mattress every year because if this song is any indication of what you are going through and doing. Maybe even every six months.

 

Matthew: Wait; was the name of the song? Remind me.

 

Becky: Closer.

 

Matthew: That is a closer. Well, that will be.

 

Becky: I don't want to get closer. I don't want to get closer to that mattress. I don't want to get closer to them. I don't want to get closer to anything in this song. I don't understand. Why are we just glossing over your alcoholism? That is like a one-liner. Like yeah! I know I drink too much. It is all right.

 

Matthew: No, it is not a problem.

 

Becky: I am a throw up on that mattress you stole from your roommate. Then I am going to pass out, blackout and pee on it like…

 

Matthew: You are going to love it.

 

Becky: Oh and why do you want to take that back?

 

Matthew: No, instead of closer. That was will be our closer.

 

Becky: Oh, I like it.

 

Matthew: Well, what will we be talking about next time?

 

Becky: Next time. Its party anthems.

 

Matthew: What kind of party anthems?

 

Becky: Yeah, it’s kinda open… children's birthday party. So party anthems I took to mean a song that everyone sings along to has their own kind of version of it when they sing. Or is like the go to karaoke one or like the end of the night drunky song that everybody sings drunk to. That is what I kind of took as the party anthem.

 

Matthew: I have mine. I don't know if it's from 2008, but it's probably close.

 

Becky: Minds of course, from the 80s. This I believe, is the first one that does not fit into the me too movement theme. I finally found one.

 

Matthew: We’re doing good work.

 

Becky: Maybe I can work it there. I got to look at the lyrics again, but I'm pretty sure it's not really, me too. It is more stalker-y.

 

Matthew: Okay, in the family of but not directly under the category.

 

Becky: Yeah, there is no overt booty references.

 

Matthew: Mambo number 5?

 

Becky: There is no donkey… ass

 

Matthew: With a monkey

 

Becky: Yeah, no big old butt kind of thing.

 

Matthew: Not yet.

 

Becky: Not yet. Although I don't know. It would be hilarious to have this. Yes next time. Party anthems. I cannot wait for mine.

 

Matthew: Well, I am excited and we will talk ‘atcha then?

 

Becky: Yes. Talk to you soon.

 

[Music playing]

 

[End 00:24:00]

In this episode Becky and Matthew delve deep into the late 80s and the early 2000s hip hop.  Will it be a hip hop battle to end all battles?

 

What the Lyric?

Rap/Hip-Hop

 

[Start 00:00:00]

 

Music: [00:00:07]

 

Becky: Welcome to What the Lyric?, the podcast that confirms. Yeah, that actually made it to radio.

 

Welcome to What the Lyric? Today we are talking about hip-hop, the rap. I don't know what else I'd call it.

 

Matthew: The rap.

 

Becky: The rap.

 

Matthew: I mean you are talking to the two white people in the room talking about hip-hop. That is what this episode is.

 

Becky: I know. Oh, this is going to go down horribly. Although I do love my 80s, rap and I love the old Run DMC stuff before Aerosmith. Who else is in there? I am trying to think. A tribe called Quest. Although I cannot remember if they were 80s or not. It all runs together now for me. Then, of course, Public Enemy. I don't think that was 80s. Maybe they were 80s. Oh, my God. Yeah. Oh, there is a lot in there. 3rd Bass. That is right; I pull out 3rd Base, which you will never know. But the one guy in 3rd Base, a white guy is now like a baseball historian at Cooperstown, if I remember correctly.

 

Matthew: That is a turn career.

 

Becky: Yeah, Pete Nice. Was it Pete Nice? Oh I don't think it was Pete Nice. I cannot remember who it was now.

 

Matthew: Was it was not Pete Townsend?

Becky: No, now I am going to have to look it up. Who were the members of 3rd Base? Yeah, so that is where I am coming from.

 

Matthew: Interesting. Mine, you know. Like, that is all I really need to say. We actually had a very interesting discussion at the end of the last episode talking about where does R&B begin versus hip-hop specifically.

 

Becky: Yes.

 

Matthew: I approach hip-hop from the more R&B side. So I am thinking Beyoncé, Lemonade.

 

Becky: All right, okay.

 

Matthew: To an extent, Drake, although he is not my favourite.

 

Becky: Oh God!

 

Matthew: And then smaller artists, particularly from the HBO show Insecure, has some very good hip-hop…

 

Becky: See I don’t know that.

 

Matthew: References. TT the artists. What is the name of the song? Is featured in it. She is great. Now I will have to introduce you to it. Then, of course, where would we be? But two people, two white people talking about hip hop. Also, listen to the entirety of Hamilton and needed to get said. There it is. It has been said we can now glaze past it.

 

Becky: I only know the Alexander Hamilton [Making sound 00:2:56]. I don't know anything else.

 

Matthew: That is all you need to know. That is what the musical is.

 

Becky: Yeah, I. Oh, man. I think I was right with Pete Nice. What did I say? Oh, my God.

 

Matthew: You did say Pete Nice.

 

Becky: Yeah. There is MC Serch and Pete Nice, but I feel like. Yeah. Pete Nice. Baseball historian, I had it right the first time.

 

Matthew: Well, with a band name like 3rd Base, you kind of have to.

 

Becky: They had a song called The Cactus.

 

Matthew: Why?

 

Becky: I can't even remember. I just remember The Cactus. I am sure I still have that CD somewhere. But yeah, The Cactus.

 

Matthew: I love.

 

Becky: I cannot even remember. It is all gone. It is so bad; they did have a big hit. What was their big hit?

 

Matthew: Was, it baseball related?

 

Becky: No, surprisingly. You would think with a name like 3rd Base. Pop goes the weasel.

 

Matthew: Oh.

 

Becky: From 1991. I remember that. That sounds like a hit. I did not have that one. I had the Cactus album and that was eighty-nine derelicts of dialect, which had the pop, goes the weasel.

Yep, that was ninety-one. That was when I graduated high school.

 

Matthew: I won't say where I was at the time.

 

Becky: And a hoodie [Laughing], moving on. All right. I am going to let you go first this time.

 

Matthew: All right. So like I said, my primary job on this podcast is to serve as millennial ambassador.

 

Becky: And I am the only.

 

Matthew: There is a generation, obviously listen to this podcast. Who is waiting for your songs, too?

 

Becky: I am sure.

 

Matthew: But I want to bring them up to speed in case they hopefully missed it.

 

Becky: I would also like to point out I am representing old school with my older school tortoiseshell old schools.

 

Matthew: Wow! Well done. Actually…

 

Becky: I did not even think about that. I just put them on this morning.

 

Matthew: I should as a side note, give Becky more credit for being much more fashionable than me. I mean, because I have just got like these shitty Nike…

 

Becky: No

 

Matthew: Running shoes and blue jeans.

 

Becky: It is Old Navy jeans and Adidas. It is not really fashionable, it is just comfortable.

 

Matthew: As we should.

 

Becky: As my vsco [Inaudible 00:5:26] said.

 

Matthew: Oh, I forgot the vsco queen of this podcast.

 

Becky: Yeah, the old lady vsco queen.

 

Matthew: So really, this song I remember driving to high school, I think senior year of high school.

 

Becky: Okay.

 

Matthew: This song is being played a lot.

 

Becky: 2008?

 

Matthew: 2008

 

Becky: Okay.

 

Matthew: Right. I was graduating high school that year.

 

Becky: Lord, have mercy, okay.

 

Matthew: And more specifically, I am trying to think. Where do I go with this? I am not really sure, but let me just say…

 

Becky: 2008 [Inaudible 00:6:09]

 

Matthew: There you go. Very fluent in Spanish.

 

Becky: Is he like Pitbull?

 

Matthew: Oh, nailed it, yes. And it was his first song. Because I was going to say, like oh! He is like…

 

Becky: The one with Robin Thicke?

 

Matthew: I did not know there was one, but that really disturbs me.

 

Becky: Where he sing I don't like it. I love it, love it, love it. Oh, is that Pitbull? That is Pitbull.

 

Matthew: Probably.

 

Becky: yeah, oh boy.

 

Matthew: This is his first one. He speaks a lot of Spanish and again, since I am incredibly white. Even though I grew up in Texas, I know no Spanish. Because I took French in high school for whatever…

 

Becky: Yeah, I took German.

 

Matthew: For whatever godforsaken reason. But my favourite my favourite thing about Pitbull is the fact that he can't decide on a nickname. He is either Mr. 305 or he is Mr. Worldwide, which therefore implies that the entirety of the 305 area code is actually the world to either him, which could either be very sweet, or the fact that he doesn't travel a lot.

 

Becky: 305, Miami, I am assuming?

 

Matthew: Yes.

 

Becky: Yeah, okay.

 

Mathew: So that is where he is from. I am assuming he is Cuban. No offense to Mr. Pitbull, if he eventually listens to this podcast…

 

Becky: I think he is.

 

Matthew: Which I highly doubt.

 

Becky: I am sure he is a big fan.

 

Matthew: Obviously.

 

Becky: Can't wait to get fan mail about that one.

 

Matthew: So really, the song that he chose was I know you want me.

Becky: Mm hmm.

 

Matthew: Which makes several assumptions that I think Pitbull has not quite figured out. I am not sure there, is a huge audience who is craving his music, but nonetheless, he still posits that people do want him. Again, most of it is in Spanish. So I will skip those parts because quite simply, I just did not take the time to Google translate any of it. The bad lyrics for it. I give it minus one point for repetitiveness…

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Because some of it is simply. I know you want me, want me. Then it is like…

 

Becky: oh, God, I don't remember.

 

Matthew: You know I want you, want you. Then it just repeats multiple times. I will not go into that. There is a lot of just, word association.

 

Becky: Yeah, okay.

 

Matthew: I know that Good hip-hop. You can do word association. And it makes sense and it flows. Pitbull just being like, oh, shit. Got it right. Like you can you can hear him like a train barrels towards the end.

 

Becky: Those are make the favourite raps. Post Malone, I hate that guy so much for this. At one point, he says something. He is trying to rhyme something. Instead of saying Luck Roy, he is says Lecroy, so he can rhyme it. First off, I hate that damn drink anyways. Second, you cannot even pronounce it right. Why? Just so you can fit in your little rap. Mr. Syracuse? I don't think so.

 

Matthew: Oh, he is from Syracuse.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Congrats. Another New York native like Becky.

 

Becky: Yeah. I did not get all the face tats, though.

 

Matthew: Not yet, you are young.

 

Becky: Working on it. I am working on it.

 

Matthew: Pitbull goes on to say, you know, stick to the clock on my way to the top, which I am like, okay. He is being timed. One assumes.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: I do not think that is necessarily a bad lyric. Then there is just a weird word association, so like Pit got it locked from Bruce to the lock her. The bruise, b-r-e-w-u-s according to the lyrics, I find that amusing. RIP so rest in peace…

 

Becky: Yeah.  

 

Matthew: Huh, Big and PAC. P-A-C, I don't know if that's like the…

 

Becky: Biggie and Pac? Biggie and 2Pac

 

Matthew: That is what I am assuming, right?

 

Becky: Yeah, okay.

 

Matthew: So it is like ok, he is doing due diligence as one does in hip-hop by making references.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: So far he has not necessarily run afoul of anything, he said premise.

 

Becky: He is also hitting both coasts like he's trying and play Sweden…

 

Matthew: Right?

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Even though he very clearly raps the east coast by being like Mr 305 checking in for the Remix.

 

Becky: Yet it is also Miami like it's not New York vs LA…

 

Matthew: You can calm down.  

 

Becky: Hip-hop, yeah.

 

Matthew: He extends his condolences to both of them, and then disses himself.

 

Becky: Many years kind of late too, by the way.

 

Matthew: This is where I started to get concerned. As far as bad lyrics and also his self-esteem, because he immediately feels like R.I.P too Bigg and Pac. That he is not, but damn, he is hot. So what that implies to me is, Pitbull is actually saying that, oh, actually I'm not nearly as talented as Bigg and Pac, which I was like…

 

Becky: Truth,

 

Matthew: Which is just truth.

 

Becky: Truth.

 

Matthew: I do appreciate it. Then he has to saddle himself like, you know, I can never be them, but I am attractive. And that's still a stretch.

 

Becky: Yeah, I would say to 2Pac is probably better looking than him in my opinion.

 

Matthew: I would agree.  I am inclined to agree. Pitbull, He has a face like a pit bull.

 

Becky: He does, there is a reason he have that name. Yeah.

 

Matthew: I don't know what it is, but I can assume it's his face.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: And so continuing. What is even weirder is that he is like the label flop. So he's already saying that like whatever label he's on is going to flop presumably because of his songs like that doesn't inspire confidence. So it's like again, a diss at the start. Then he says, but Pitt won't stop. Label flop, but Pitt won't stop.

 

Becky: Wait a minute. Maybe what he is saying is, you know, I like when you would be like, oh, my God, I am totally failing this test. Then you nail it like he's psyching himself out, like I am the shittiest rapper. Then boom! Platinum.

 

Matthew: Huge fame. I don’t know if this ever went platinum. I would be surprised, but also not surprised if that were to happen.

 

Becky: You never know.

 

Matthew: But he is always starting with the dislike that he is not. But damn, he's hot. Label flop. But Pitt won't stop. And I'm like, ok. Then very left turn. Got her in the car playing with his como. And that's where he answered Spanish. Oh, wait, why are you having sex in a car? I am not surprised.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: But he was like, I am going to be an amazing rapper. Oh no, getting my dick sucked in a car.

 

Becky: Well, all right. I mean, you know, to each his own is all I am saying. You granted it back in the day…

 

Matthew: So, we should let Pitbull have his own.

 

Becky: Whatever makes him happy? You do you. Live your best life.

 

Matthew: Right. And this is where the associations continue because right. In two lines, He has gone from being like, I am sorry that Biggie died…

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: And Tupac died. The label is going to flop. I mean, but I am going to keep making music. I am receiving oral in our car. Then he says, watch him make a movie like Alfred Hitchcock. Ha! Enjoy me.

 

Becky: Has, he made a movie?

 

Matthew: No, not at all. None. I don't think he's directed his own music videos. If he has, I can tell you the music one for this one. Looks like it was directed by…

 

Becky: I might know somebody who has done a video with him.

 

Matthew: Did they direct it?

 

Becky: No. He is a cinematographer. Curious at least he picked a good director.

 

Matthew: Right.

 

Becky: Alfred Hitchcock.

 

Matthew: He was not choosing…

 

Becky: One of my favourites.

 

Matthew: I am trying to think of who would be a bad director.

 

Becky: Well, the guy did. Oh, God. What is that movie that? James Franco did a movie about him that won an award, but he did not.

 

Matthew: Tommy Wiseau.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Watch him make a movie like Tommy Wiseau. Huh! Enjoy me.

 

Becky: See, that works a little better for this.

 

Matthew: It actually does.

 

Becky: If he could have just let us edit his words, he would be spot on. Yeah, either him. I am trying to think Ed Wood.

 

Matthew: What does he do? I don't think I know, Ed Wood.

 

Becky: Oh, you have to go back and watch an Ed Wood movie. I think one of my favourites, which is called Jail Bait. And there's this weird 1950s. There is this weird, depending on which version you get. There is this weird kind of like guitar piece in it that keeps showing up randomly throughout and you think it is there to like build tension, but you are like, [Inaudible 00:15:01] just threw that guitar riff in there for no real reason. It is like you have flamenco, kind of. I don't know how to describe it, but it's hilarious. Johnny Depp actually starred is him in a movie called Ed Wood. He was pretty epic at making like B movies where you're like, what! is going on here? Plan 9 from outer space, I think is him…

 

Matthew: Oh! Okay,

 

Becky: Yes. Jailbait is probably my favourite.

 

Matthew: I will have to check these out. Thank you for the movie recommendation. The last time I recommended Repo the Genetic Opera.

 

Becky: Yeah. Plan 9 from outer space…

 

Matthew: Jailbait first.

 

Becky: Jailbait though is my favourite and I used to own it on VHS. That is how old I am.

 

Matthew: Oh yeah. If it makes you feel any better. I was acquainted with VHS.

 

Becky: Yeah. I am the VHS. Oh God! That movie was so good. So bad, it was so good. I am sure it is him, Jailbait. It has to be. He has done so many, and I think he did with like Vampira. Yeah, that is Ed Wood. Oh, so many. Oh, yeah. Glen or Glenda? Also a classic. Mm hmm. Genius of a man.

 

Matthew: That is incredible.

 

Becky: I wish there were more like him out there that could do these kinds of movies.

 

Matthew: We can only aspire too. But I mean, also Pittbull could aspire to, be the Ed Wood but currently he wants to be Alfred Hitchcock.

 

Becky: That is not happening.

 

Matthew: But when I was really thinking about this, I was like, what? You know, in my limited experience with hip-hop, what lyric stand out to me is like the worst things I can think of.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: And this one stood out in my brain, has not left my brain for the past eleven years, and presumably will not be my brain until I die. It is this line.

 

Becky: Okay.

 

Matthew: Because remember, the rest is repetitive. Mommy got an ass like a donkey with a monkey look like King Kong. Welcome to the crib. Now, granted, also, I do need to…

 

Becky: Okay.

 

Matthew: Make a very specific point that when I say mommy, it sounds like I am talking about…

 

Becky: Mom.

Matthew: Right.

 

Becky: And actual Mom

 

Matthew: Its spell M-A-M-I. It is Spanish. I am incredibly white. I cannot make this work. I need you to know...

 

Becky: Mommy and Pappy.

 

Matthew: Yes. Exactly. Like he is clearly talking about an attractive young woman.

 

Becky: A lady friend.

 

Matthew: Quite honestly, does not make me feel any better about it because he's dancing. She has an ass like a donkey, which I do. I will give him credit for the association…

 

Becky: That is good little…

 

Matthew: Word played.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: It is like saying like, oh, hurray. I can do this wordplay. But I forgot that this is implying that I would fuck a duck.

 

Becky: Yeah. Yeah, like a donkey got a sweet booty. Yeah…ewe.

 

Matthew: An ass like a donkey and he says monkey. Like a donkey with a monkey. Then why with a monkey? She specifically has an ass like a donkey that has a monkey. Look like King Kong. Now, does he mean the woman? Does he mean the monkey? Or does he mean the donkey?

 

Becky: It is all very offensive. However, you look at it, every part of that is offensive. Like there is not a moment where you go, well, that is very flattering. I appreciate that. No, nothing like. Where does the monkey come in? That is just to make the rhyme, clearly.

 

Matthew: Now, would you be flattered if a man would actually say you have an ass like a donkey.

 

Becky: That is like Sisqo she got dumps like a truck, truck, truck.

 

Mathew: Okay I did forget about that.

 

Becky: The Thong Song, and then there is Wreckx-n-Effect with the rump shaker. There is another one, actually. This is a perfect lead in mine.

 

Matthew: Done, I was like, honestly, that I just want to say for the audience at home, that lyric haunts me to this day and I truly wish that it haunts you as well.

 

Becky: Great. Okay and mine is from 1989.

 

Matthew: That was prior to around the time of conception but definitely not [Inaudible 00:19:48].

 

Becky: Okay. So mine is from 1989 and I remember this song so I'm going to read the first part of it. I was at the mall sipping on a milkshake, playing the wall, taking a break. Admiring the girls with the bamboo earrings, baby hair and bodies built to swing. That is when I seen her. Name was Tina. Grace and Poise, kind of like a ballerina. I say how you doing? My name's big L don't ask me how I'm living because yo, I'm live in swell. But then again, I am living kind of foul because my girl don't know that I'm out on the prowl. To make a long story short, I got the digits.  Calls, one that drives me crazy. Calls her on my car phone and paid her a visit. I was spanking her, thanking her, chewing her, and doing her. Land like a king and sat on sheets of Satin. Well, that is what time it is. You know what is happening? She had a big old booty, and I am doing my duty.

 

I mean, yo, I admit that girls cutie. But Tina was erratic, Earl is my witness with the kind of legs that put stockings out of business. I went home. I kissed my girl on the cheek, but in the back of my mind was this big butt freak. I fat my girl down. I could not hold it in, and that is when I said to her, with a devilish grin. Tina got a big old butt.

Matthew: That was a perfect Segway.

Becky: Yeah, then it goes on. I know I told you I would be true. But Tina got a big old butt, so I'm leaving you. So this is LL Cool J, big old butt.

 

Matthew: This is LL Cool J?

 

Becky: Oh, my God. He has another one called Backseat in my Jeep, which is another one of my favourites, one of the lyrics said. It is like backseat of my Jeep. We swing an ep. So you could not say episode, he had to shorten it down to ep to sound hard.

 

Matthew: Wow

 

Becky: But yes, the whole song has him bouncing around from girl to girl with big old butts. So then, he moves on to I believe it is Brenda. Who he met at high school. Mm hmm.

 

Matthew: That's, you know, usually where this occurs.

 

Becky: Then he goes to Red Lop, so he started at the mall. Then he goes to the high school.

 

Matthew: Have we confirmed that he too is in high school?

 

Becky: Oh, I don't think so at this time.

 

Matthew: Oh, yikes.

 

Becky: Yeah. Mm hmm. He went to the high school about three o'clock. So clearly, he is not in high school.

 

Matthew: Oh.

 

Becky: To try and catch cutie. Riding my jock.

 

Matthew: That is a popular line.

 

Becky: I have not heard that a long time. She had that kind of booty that I always remember. I would say to my man, stop the jeep. She is only 17, but yo, don't sleep. So again, I have a theme for this series, apparently.

 

Matthew: You sure you do. I like 2008. You like rape song.

 

Becky: Yeah. I don't know what it is. Then he put the big booty on a bearskin rug.

 

Matthew: Wow! Why the fuck does, he have a bearskin rug?

 

Becky: He got satin sheets and a bearskin rug. LL…

 

Matthew: He just fuck so much.

 

Becky: He is on point as far as like 70s porn house.

 

Matthew: Easily. He call Hugh Hefner and I was like, can I fuck as many girls in your house as possible?

 

Becky: Yeah. I like I scope the booty like a big game hunter. I said to the girl, you, you look tired. Let's go get some rest. Relax by the fire.

 

Matthew: Oh, okay. Naked.

 

Becky: Apparently.

 

Matthew: But that is a terrible way to lay naked, because let us all remember that fires only come in one direction.

 

Becky: Yes, so half of you is sweating to death. The other half is freezing and you are on a bearskin rug. So now, half of you is sweating with bear fur stuck to you. Everything about this is wrong.

 

Matthew: That is so erotic.

Becky: Then if you move to like the satin she. She just like right off. like nothing about it is good. Yeah. Oh, he also grabbed a pack of bullets and pulled out the steel. So how about that?

 

Matthew: The steel?

 

Becky? How about that for slang for putting a condom on?

 

Matthew: Okay.

 

Becky: Yep. Then he gets back, and he goes to Tina. I am going with Brenda now because she got a big old butt. So he's leaving you.

 

Matthew: Wow!

 

Becky: Later on, he goes to Red Lobster. For shrimp and steak, as it says, it must be the next day because we are at lunchtime now, because this is around the time when the waitresses are on lunch break. You know, he is hanging his bro, then he meet Lisa, one thing leads to another. And he's got to tell Brenda.

 

Matthew: It is time for her to go.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Wait! What is the name of the song? Remind me.

 

Becky: Big ole butt.

 

Matthew: Big ole butt. It is just butt?

 

Becky: This was on the radio.

 

Matthew: Constantly.

 

Becky: Yeah, I remember this. Yeah.

 

Matthew: This is…

 

Becky: Big ole butt.

 

Matthew: Fascinating.

 

Becky: Hmmm. LL Cool J 1989.

 

Matthew: Assinating that is what I am going to call it.

 

Becky: It is assinating. I mean, he just. You know, I out and about. Maybe pulled in the parking lot, and parked his car. Somebody shouted out. I don't care who you are, I pay no attention. I walk inside because Brian had a nine and he was chilling in the ride. I got to be honest, I don't know what the hell that means.

 

Matthew: That is so weird.

 

Becky: Shrimp and Steak was not the only thing cooking.

 

Matthew: What?

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Although this does make you feel better that like consistently hip-hop artist, do you go to Red Lobster after they are fucking because, you know, Beyoncé is like… like,

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Fuck him so good. I don’t remember.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Basically the sex so good that she's like, I take his ass to Red Lobster and now turns out LL Cool J originated the like lets go to lobster.

 

Becky: I feel Beyoncé is lying on this one.

 

Matthew: She would never…

 

Becky: Jay Z…..Red Lobster.

 

Matthew: There are multiple things like really…

 

Becky: For reals, yeah. But this girl Lisa was like, you got a girl and it don't matter. You are looking tastier than a piping hot pizza. Then he of course, I don't know why this was something he thought the ladies are going to enjoy this line. When she walked out the door, I threw my tongue down her throat.

 

Matthew: Ewe.

 

Becky: No.

 

Matthew: Also, that is a terrible verb for it. Like I threw it down her throat.

 

Becky: I don't want you touching my tonsils. The doctor is the old one who should be touching my tonsils and my uvula, and I love that term uvula.

 

Matthew: Even there on him fucking ice when they touch your tonsils.

 

Becky: Yeah. Dentist if necessary. No. And of course, this is the 80s. Late 80s after he has done his business. He grabs his pants and put on his kangol.

 

Matthew: Wow. It is the 80s.

 

Becky: Yeah. Then who did I see? Oh, yow it was Brenda. Yow, she worked at Red Lobster but I did not remember.

 

Matthew: Wow!

 

Becky: Lisa got a big ole butt.

Matthew: Wait, he bring Lisa to Red Lobster.

 

Becky: He picked up Lisa a Red Lobster, but forgot Brenda also worked at Red Lobster.

 

Mathew: LL Cool J, what the hell are you doing.

 

Becky: I mean you just getting yourself into a train wreck. Yeah-Big Ole Butt.

 

Matthew: Wow! That is…

 

Becky: I can still hear the whole thing in my head. Brenda got a big ole butt it is awesome. I will listen to it tomorrow at work.

 

Matthew: See what I appreciate. I feel like with very few exceptions, most of the songs that we choose are so lovable.

 

Becky: Oh, I am still going to listen to him.

 

Matthew: In spite of the bad lyrics.

 

Becky: Except for two. The first one we did. Which is that James Arthur piece of trash.

 

Matthew: Yes.

 

Becky: That one, never. Like I will listen to it because I am being forced to. Because somebody wants to see me go what the fuck is? Does anyone not listen to this.

 

Matthew: Is anyone hearing this?

 

Becky: Yeah. Then there is another song. That is right up there for me. That every time it comes on I am like no. There is no way, no how, nope.

 

Matthew: What is it?

 

Becky: Oh, you will find out because it is going to be, I think, on our next episode.

 

Matthew: Oh, this will be interesting.

 

Becky: Yeah, yes.

 

Matthew: Actually. You know what. I realized we mistakenly forgot to do for our last episode.  We need to give…

 

Becky: We keep doing this.

 

Matthew: We have to assign a yikes.

 

Becky: We did not assign a yikes. Then we also forgot that we do have a Web site.

 

Matthew: You, know what? People who are bingeing this up.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: You will been binge these episode…

 

Becky: And you will know. It is just whatthelyric.com. I mean, really make sense.

 

Matthew: Exactly.

 

Becky: The yikes factor on this one for me. Oh God. I love it.

 

Matthew: Yeah. That is the thing where it is like honestly.

 

Becky: Hmm.

 

Matthew: Well, it depends. Right. Because it is like infidelity.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: That is not pleasant. But lyrics purely on lyrics alone. I think that is where we have to go with.

 

Becky: It is a little like that holiday song. Baby its cold outside where people like, oh, my God, that is awful.

 

Matthew: Oh, yes.

 

Becky: We should never play it again, but we remove it out of the context of the time that it was done in. And granted, it's never okay to be pushy with a woman at the same time. Is 1940s much like shipoopi with 1950s. It is not like somebody is writing up, redoing shipoopi.

 

Matthew: To make it…

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Hip and also consensual.

 

Becky: Though maybe I will give it a go.

 

Matthew: I hope you do.

 

Becky: I am going to do the female version of it.

 

Matthew: He poufy?

 

Becky: What would that be? Oh, no.

 

Matthew: He is shitty.

 

Becky: Oh that, I am writing it down. He is shitty. Okay I am writing down he is shitty, and then this is my assignment. Okay, it is going to take a while, but I will come up with something.

 

Matthew: Love it. That should be the season finally.

 

Becky: [Inaudible 00:30:35] shitty.

Matthew: Debuting.

 

Becky: Oh, if only I knew someone who could get like Peter Griffin to read it. It would be amazing. Yeah, so on the yike scale. For me, I just…sigh, [Inaudible 00:30:56] is a tough one for me because I have seen interviews and he's just Mr. Positive.

 

Matthew: I know.

 

Becky: So you cant really hate him, but God. His lyrics are awful.

 

Matthew: The lyrics are bad. I give it, trying to be unbiased, but I can't.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Like I would say a solid 3, I'm almost out of 4. But the positivity and honestly the rest of it is like huh! Most of this is in Spanish. You just mistakenly said that you wanted to fuck a donkey with a monkey around or on the donkey.

 

Becky: Yeah, Maybe it is just the setting. He did not express what the setting was. Like they are out on a beach, some tropical beach where there is wild animals.

 

Matthew: That is true, and also, I feel like it's one of those things where it's like Pitbull is the Tobias Funke of hip hop.

 

Becky: Really? He is.

 

Matthew: Because he said shit where he is like, oh, I want it. It sounds like he wants to fuck this animal. But really, it's like I just blow myself.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: That is the equivalent.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: I just blew myself.

 

Becky: Yeah, I think you are right. I think he is. Yeah.

Matthew: So I will give it a three.

 

Becky: See, I am going four. I feel like he's never really offended, like he's not. There is nothing super offensive about it. Like the donkey, butt thing is probably the worst. But that kind of rolls back on him,

I mean.

 

Matthew: He did let these lyrics…..he both…

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Helped write and perform these lyrics.

 

Becky: Yeah. I am going with a four on that one.

 

Matthew: [Inaudible 00:32:30]

 

Becky: LL Cool J on the other hand. He is like right up there. I am going with like one is like the end all be all the yuck factor. Is that what we said before? I probably do it all around.

 

Matthew: No. I forget… honestly I do also forget what the scale is. For the purposes of this podcast and moving forward.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: One is the worst. Five is the least offensive.

 

Becky: I am saying Pitbull is low grade offensive.

 

Matthew: Yes, okay. I would agree.

 

Becky: Yeah. On the scale, he is low grade. LL Cool J In the 80s, full on offensive like that whole song is epically like wow! In every way. I feel like I need a crying game shower after listening that. Also same deal with backseat of my jeep. But I still listen to them.

 

Matthew: You got to love them.

 

Becky: Kind of Religiously. Yeah, so I would give them. Backseat of my jeep, which I really wish I had kind of done too. And big ole butt more like two for me.

Matthew: Okay, see I was leaning much more toward four for with this.

 

Becky: Oh!

 

Matthew: I will say I am a product if nothing but of my generation.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: You have to remember, like, boom. Twenty-three. Robin Thicke Blurred Lines come out.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Suddenly someone being like I am having sex with a lot of these women and in really inconvenient places. But I'm only referring to their butt, I'm referring to their butts as butts and not like she's got a fine ass on her like a donkey.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: So I am kind of like this is heart-warming. He is only calling it a butt. And, you know, it's like he is problematic in different ways, but not as bad as…

 

Becky: Oh.

 

Matthew: You know, raping people, raping and pillaging.

 

Becky: Yeah, he was definitely rapey. Yeah, I'm going…  

 

Matthew: I like spread, though.

 

Becky: Apparently so did LL Cool J. Seems to be a common theme in the rap.

 

Matthew: They all like the spread.

 

Becky: Even some of the ladies. Yeah. God, I am trying to think who is the one. There was one Lil Kim who you can't even… doesn't even look like she used to. I was like that's not a Lil Kim. Oh, my God, it is. Yeah, she liked the spread, so to speak.

 

Matthew: Oh, I agree. But I feel like this is product. I feel like we hit some high notes in hip-hop.

Becky: Yes. We went with the tried and true. The old school, like one of the godfathers of hip-hop, sort of. More popular hip-hop.

 

Matthew: And one of the parasite's.

 

Becky: Yes. Exactly I mean, God love your Pitbull.

 

Matthew: But is he even making music? I am sure he is.

 

Becky: Guarantee tomorrow we will be like, oh…

 

Matthew: The newest Pitbull song.  

 

Becky: He just drop the deuce, so to speak.  That is kind of wrapping it up on the hip-hop. Oh, I pull a dad joke. Next time, we are just going rogue and we are picking whatever, the hell we want. And I will tell you, I have a doozy.

 

Matthew: I have no doubts. Oh, I should have thought of No Doubt.

 

Becky: No

 

Matthew: [Inaudible 00:36:06] hole But we will save that for next.

 

Becky: Oh, all right. So next time it is our free for all. And we will talk to you guys then.

 

[Music playing]

 

[End 00:36:35]

Join Becky and Matthew as they turn their attention to musicals - both the broadway kind and the movie musical kind.  One is from the golden age of Broadway.  The other is from a little know movie opera from 2008.  Both deserve to be skewered.

 

What the Lyrics?

Musicals

[Start 00:00:00]

 

Becky: Hey, guys, just a quick note. When we went to record this, I left my headphones at home so I couldn't hear the funky noises that were happening when I was banging on the table during this discussion because I was so excited and heated about this discussion of musical songs. I apologize for that. Hopefully doesn't interfere with you loving the episode and liking us a million times and telling your friends about how awesome we are. With that said, I hope you enjoy it, and next time I will remember my headphones.

 

Music playing [00:00:38-00:00:45]

 

Becky: Welcome to What the Lyric? The podcast that confirms, yeah, that actually made it to radio. Welcome to Episode 3 of What the Lyric? Today we are talking musicals. How are you doing Matt?

 

Matthew: I am doing pretty well considering how much research I had to do into bad musicals, of which there are many.

 

Becky: There are a lot and a lot have made money, which is the part that I don't quite get. I am not sure how they made money because they were so bad.

 

Matthew: Agreed, and I took a broad stance on the definition of musicals. So thinking more along the lines of not just Broadway musicals, but off Broadway and basically movie musicals.

 

Becky: It was the movie ones that I was kind of like, do I go Disney? Because Disney has some crap lyrics, or I could go to all the stuff, we did when I was in high school. What did we do? We did Grease, but we had to change the lyrics on some of the stuff because it was too racy.

 

Matthew: Such as?  

 

Becky: In one of the songs about him meeting. It was some weird slang for condom, but we could use it.

Matthew: Was it rubber?

 

Becky: It was not using. I don't think it was. I would have to look it up but I think it was rubber. I feel like it was something like balloon or something. But you knew what it was when he was thinking about it. So we had to kind of do like the radio edit and go [sound 00:2:30] or something in it so that you filled in the blank.

 

Matthew: Which teenager does not know about condoms?

 

Becky: Oh my god. It was in the 1990s.

 

Matthew: Oh, they really did not know about condom.  

 

Becky: 1991, so we should have. I mean it was all coming up then so we should have left it in there but no.

 

Matthew: I mean our high school did Wizard of Oz. That is very wholesome to an extent considering the fans, I don’t know, destruction.

 

Becky: Yeah. The Wizard of Oz. What else do we do? Of course, there is always music Man Fiddler on the Roof.

 

Matthew: South Pacific.

 

Becky: You guys had some serious production.

 

Matthew: I did not say it was good.

 

Becky: High school musicals are very rarely good. I mean, let us be realistic on that one. I went back to my high school musical roots for mine.

 

Matthew: I think that is a perfect segue way into me asking

 

Becky: Okay.

 

Matthew: Where did you go?

 

Becky: All right.

 

Matthew: Take us back.

 

Becky: We are going back to and in the movie sung by Buddy Hackett, who I remember from when I was younger and he was an older man who I have this vague recollection of him being like a dirty old man kind of guy.

 

Matthew: I mean he was way. Wait, when was this made?

 

Becky: 60-65, let us say. I want to say 65. No, Sorry. Well, the musical was 57; 62 was the movie.

 

Matthew: That was a generation of dirty old men.

 

Becky: Yeah, yeah. Also covered by the Family Guy and several other outlets. I am just in a dive right into it. You ready?

 

Matthew: I don't believe so, but I'm willing to listen.

 

Becky: I think this first group, set it up nicely. Well, a woman who will kiss you on the very first date is usually a hussy and a woman who will kiss you on the second time out is anything but fussy. But a woman who will wait till the third time around. Head in the cloud, feet on the ground. She is your girl. You are glad you found. She is your shipoopi, shipoopi, shipoopi. The girl who is hard to get shipoopi, shipoopi. shipoopi, but you can winner yet. Mm hmm. That is shipoopi from the Music Man.

 

Matthew: Wow.

 

Becky: The whole thing is yet again a me-too movement in song form.

 

Matthew: Do we have any historical context for, is shipoopi slang for anything. Do we..

 

Becky: I don't think so. When I was doing the research for this. I just typed in worst song in a musical ever, and it brought up like some sort of forum for Broadway musicals. And everybody was writing these dissertations and one person just wrote shipoopi. And that's really all you need because shipoopi, I mean you can't say without giggling either, before, after, during and it shipoopi. What is that?

 

Matthew: And they don't explain it? That is why I love that. He does not need to explain it. He is just like.

 

Becky: No.

 

Matthew: So she is playing hard to get or presumably saying no. But it was like men who are super into...

 

Becky: My guess is she probably hates this guy. Thinks he is a total dill hole, but yet he just keeps breaking her down by saying shipoopi in front of her. Like a playground thing. He just keeps calling her shipoopi. And eventually she breaks out and goes, okay, I guess that's the guy.

 

Matthew: That is the guy from me. You know, I was not going to have sex with him the first day. Then he said shipoopi about 17 more times.

 

Becky: You know when I met your father.

 

Matthew: [Laughing] he had cutest name for me.

 

Becky: All he said was shipoopi. He did not say anything. He just said shipoopi over and over and over again. And we thought he had been dropped on his head, but apparently not. And that's when I fell in love.

 

Matthew: I knew he was the one.

 

Becky: By the third day of shipoopi. That is when I knew.

 

Matthew: Wait. What is the bumper sticker slogan that is like? Sorry, like not having to say sorry.

 

Becky: Oh, I cannot. Yeah, I know the one you are talking about.

 

Matthew: I think it is from a movie. Something means not having to say you are sorry.

 

Becky: Yeah, shipoopi mean.

 

Becky and Matthew: Not having to say that you are sorry.

 

Becky: I'm going to just start filling in shipoopi when I can't remember the words, which is a lot of times now that we've found out we have Alzheimer's and dementia in the family. So now, all of us are forgetting everything. So we are just going to be like, you know, that time shipoopi, you know? Right. shipoopi and see, who knows. But yeah, I mean and it continues on in the kind of abusive way with squeezer once when she isn't looking.

 

Matthew: Who!

 

Becky: Who does that?

 

Matthew: Apparently Buddy Hackett.

 

Becky: I like if you get a squeeze back that is fancy cooking. I don't know anyone, any woman who would get squeezed and be like oh, oh well hello. Then squeeze back and mean it.

 

Matthew: It brings up a very viable point. Of where on the spectrum of being touched does being slapped follow like is it technically a squeeze?

 

Becky: It could be. Or she might have just grabbed him by his junk and was like, never do that again, if you want to keep this and then he said once more for a pepper upper, she'll never get sore on her way to supper. So all this is happening, I presumably on the first date?

 

Matthew: No, because then she will be a hussy. So would it be…?

 

Becky: Well, no. If you kissed her on the first date, is she is usually a hussy.

 

Matthew: I see.

 

Becky: The second date it is your borderline because a woman who you kiss the second time out is anything but fussy. She is, you know, almost out to pasture. Then the third time around, that is the gal.

 

Matthew: Okay, got you.

 

Becky: If on the third day you squeeze her and she squeezes you back, home run.

 

Matthew: Fancy cooking.

 

Becky: Yeah, It is fancy cooking and a home run. Then once more up for a pepper upper. If you do it again and she is game, then you have just won the World Series, I guess.

 

Matthew: Marry this woman.

 

Becky: Yeah. Yeah. I cannot even.

 

Matthew: I feel like this song is a good example of like, is it bad lyrics? Because in the 50s and 60s, you had no way of just saying like, oh, we are banging on the bathroom floor.

 

Becky: Yeah. I mean.

 

Matthew: There is a lot of euphemisms for sex here. Fancy Cook and Pepper upper.

 

Becky: Well, pepper upper. I think drugs. I think we are looking for like an upper. Like maybe, a little ecstasy or I don't know, special k. Do kids still do that? Is that even a drugs?

 

Matthew: I think I am sure. I am a square, you are talking to the wrong person. I am impressed. I am assuming that most of these are euphemisms for sex.

 

Becky: I don't know. I should have asked my mother and father and be like, hey, when you guys were kids and talking about slang for sex. Did you ever go shipoopi or fancy cooking or pepper upper?

 

Matthew: Actually, there is still time. So like the follow up to this episode will be the [Inaudible 00:10:37]

 

Becky: I will call my parents after this.

 

Matthew: We will record it.

 

Becky: Quick question. It would not be any worse than, some of the questions my mom woken me up with her asking to, tell her what some slang means because somebody's at work, young kids that work mentioned and she didn't want to seem like she was not cool.

 

Matthew: Uncool.

 

Becky: Yeah. Tea bagging was one of them.

 

Matthew: Perfect. Never forget where you were. The moment your mom asks you.

 

Becky: No, I was not. I will not. I just gotten to work. And my mom called and she said, hey, look, I got a question for you, can you. What is tea bagging? I just walked in the door. Can I call you back after I call my therapist and get some coffee? And apparently it was during the whole like…

 

Matthew: Tea Party moment?

 

Becky: Tea Party stuff. And mom, they were joking. It said something about Tea Bagging and I had to explain tea bagging. It went downhill from there. Years of therapy for that one.

 

Matthew: That is fancy cooking.

 

Becky: And a pepper upper in the morning if you have to answer that question, yeah.

 

Matthew: To say the least.

 

Becky: [Laughing] you have no idea. I was like I'm sorry, what now? did you just ask me. I got to go. I need to call my therapist. And I’m actually my therapist right now, and the siren. Oh, Seattle full moon weekend. You are the best.

 

Matthew: I should have curse a lot more. Just so, we can edit it out.

 

Becky: I know, oh well. All right. So Matt, what did you go with?

 

Matthew: Since we will be releasing the other music episode, we did.

 

Becky: Yes.

 

Matthew: This is actually a redo by my request. Upon reflection, realized that I feel like I had not done my due diligence. Right. Because the purpose of this podcast is to find bad lyrics and call them out as they happen, even in songs that we love. Upon reflection, I realize that rent, the reason why I called out rent the way I did is because I fucking hate that musical.

 

Becky: The musicals is awful.

 

Matthew: The lyrics were not necessarily the problem. The content of the entire musical is what really bothered me.

 

Becky: Yeah. That is a whole other episode. Like we could take down the entire musical in one episode. Maybe that would be a probably a two-parter.

 

Matthew: Yes just for me.

 

Becky: There is an intermission in that play.

 

Matthew: Forty-five minutes of me bitching about this movie because of how much, I fucking hate rent.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: But I was like, you know the lyrics were not necessarily bad. I just hated the content. So then, I dug deep and ended up watching a movie musical from 2008.

 

Becky: 2008.

 

Matthew: The two biggest names would have been Paris Hilton, and Sarah Brightman.

 

Becky: what?

 

Matthew: Who famously.

 

Becky: Was married. To Andrew Lloyd Webber.

 

Matthew: The best play write of a generation.

 

Becky: I dislike that guy and all, he's written so much. I cannot. I just cannot. I cannot.

 

Matthew: Surprisingly, though, he did not write. It feels like this would have been something he wrote.

 

Becky: Paris Hilton and Sarah Brightman.

 

Matthew: I think they were the two biggest names. Also, the guy who played well, he was on Buffy. I think he was British.

 

Becky: Oh, yeah. Who then married…

 

Matthew: Giles.

 

Becky: Yeah. Who then married one of the other characters in that.

 

Matthew: Did not realize that.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: But he is in this movie as well. I ended up watching.

 

Becky: 2008.

 

Matthew: Eleven years ago.

 

Becky: God. Okay, 2008. I don't even know what happened in 2008.

 

Matthew: Financial crisis.

 

Becky: Okay.

 

Matthew: Well actually, that could play into this story.

 

Becky: Please tell me, they did a musical, The Wolf of Wall Street.

 

Matthew: I think that on is still in the works.

 

Becky: probably. What the hell?

 

Matthew: I don't really have any hints, but I will say that it is. Repo, the genetic opera, which if you have heard of or have not heard of, rather, is a movie musical from 2008. The overall plot of which is that everyone is getting cancer. Everyone is dying in this dystopian land. As they are dying, there is this one capitalistic company that says, oh, well, we have organs essentially for rent. We will give you these organs to keep you alive. But if you miss any payments, the repo man will come take the organ and you will die.

 

Becky: This feel like that Tom Cruise movie. What was that one? Similar? I don't know if it was similar. It is probably not, I just see Tom Cruise and then I go to my happy place because I cannot stand him either. Oh, well that is gone now. I have to look at.

 

Matthew: I feel like…

 

Becky: It is shipoopi. It is shipoopi.

 

Mathew: Tom Cruise in shipoopi.

 

Becky: I would see that. Actually, that would be something I would see.

 

Matthew: His voice undoubtedly is terrible.

 

Becky: That laugh, I needed that laugh.

 

Matthew: That is the overall plot of it. There are a lot of twists and turns in it. It is a real weird movie musical. I am not sure if I recommend it, but I do recommend watching it just so that you get context for how bad the song is. One of the main characters is a girl who is told that she has this terrible condition. She basically can't go outside.

 

Becky: Oh, my God. Like bubble boy?

 

Matthew: Exactly. Spoiler alert. Full spoiler alert. It is not real. Her dad was just like I told you that so you wouldn't leave an entry this like dystopian land, whatever. But the entire movie is incredibly angst. The main character, this little girl named Shiloh is 16. Then she celebrates her 17th birthday and she has a song about turning 17. That, is the song that I have picked. It is called 17 and I chose it. Not only because of how terrible the lyrics are, but also it is precisely a Goth version of 16 going on 17…

 

Becky: Thank you.

                                                                                                         

Matthew: From sound of music.

 

Becky: I was going to ask is it? Please tell me that it has something to do with, I am 16, going on 17. Minority Report was the movie I was thinking.

 

Matthew: Yeah, okay. I could see that.

 

Becky: Yeah, sorry.

 

Matthew: Sound of music. Right. It is super cute. She is falling in love with the Nazi.

 

Becky: Sad note, I have never seen it.

 

Matthew: Oh. Spoiler alert. She fall in love with the Nazi.

 

Becky: Yeah. I have never seen it, but I know it. I know all the lyrics, to that frickin musical as well.

 

Matthew: She is 16

 

Matthew and Becky: Going on 17.

 

Matthew: It gets repeated a lot. It is very cute. I think she is like very excited about that.

 

Becky: She dating a Nazi, wait.

 

Matthew: Yes.

 

Becky: Okay. Yep, there we go.

 

Matthew: She is dancing on a gazebo with him and she is very happy to turns 17. Shiloh in this movie, however, is very displeased to be 17. And what I will pause it here. Is that Repo the genetic opera for all of the bad lyrics, in fact, actually nails were being 17 is like. Let's take a look at the lyrics.

 

Becky: The title of the movie makes me think a repo man like an opera of the Repo Man, which would be kind of awesome. I don't know if you can still get Emilio Estevez.

 

Matthew: Probably not, but this is like a much dumber version of it. I still recommend watching it. Only if you are inebriated in some way, but don’t do drugs kids.

 

Becky: Yeah, that will be later on today.

 

Matthew: Yes. Alcohol or weed. That is as strong as my recommendation get.

 

Becky: That will be today.

 

Matthew: It is very angst. She cries out 17. Momma drama has to go dad. 17, nothing is going to bring her back. Oh, her mom is dead. Also spoiled alert. Her mom's dad. Hence mama dramas.

 

Becky: I thought maybe he had a couple of ladies on the side and he didn't know which one was the actual mother of this kid.

 

Matthew: Oh, no, he is not dating. But the daughter is distraught. Her mom's dead, so 17. Nothing is going to bring her back. 17, experiment with something living. 17, cause I am sweeter than 16.

                            

Becky: That sounds like dad is hooking up with his daughter.

 

Matthew: The movie leaves that open. I mean, not really, but there are some weird things happening there.

 

Becky: Please tell me that this, character's played by Paris Hilton.

 

Matthew: No, sadly.

 

Becky: Damn it.

 

Matthew: But Paris Hilton's character is very on brand…. I will does not spoil that.

 

Becky: Does she sing?

 

Matthew:  Not well.

 

Becky: That is right. She did have an album out.

 

Matthew: She did. We all know she did not get many after or any Grammys.

 

Becky: Did she really mean to? She is loaded,

 

Matthew: Right. That ends up being the chorus. So I will stop yelling 17 at you, but just know that throughout this she got 17. Other choice lyrics, I would say. Again, I feel like this captures my experience being a 17 year old. I have always longed for true affection is one lyric. I am like, okay. Like, that is not a bad lyric.

 

Becky: No.

 

Matthew: But the next line after it is. But you compare me to a corpse.

 

Becky: What?

 

Matthew: And then the third lyric is Stay with the dead. I'm joining the living cause I'm freer than 16.

 

Becky: Huh? Okay.

 

Matthew: Right. It is teenage angst.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Specifically served up in teenage incomprehension.

 

Becky: Yep.

 

Matthew: Which I do appreciate. I don't know why 16 is the thing holding her back. Why she needs to be freer than 16. Also, I don't know why she got compared to a corpse.

 

Becky: Yeah, and I got to say, being 46 now. 16 looks awesome because nobody else is paying my goddamn bills.

 

Matthew: Doesn't it feel great?

 

Becky: And like my laundry was getting done? Like, yeah. Food was…

 

Matthew: Served.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: You did not have to cook. You did not have to clean.

 

Becky: No.

 

Matthew: Pay bills.

 

Becky: Nope.

 

Matthew: did not have to work.

 

Becky: I just had to be angst, and sit in my room and listen to music.

 

Matthew: Exactly.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: Music like 17 from repo the genetic opera.

 

Becky: Just like that.

 

Matthew: So it goes on because there are two more things that I really appreciate about this. Number one; there is a Joan Jett solo in this.

 

Becky: As in like the real Joan Jett?

 

Matthew: Yes. She makes an appearance in the movie.

 

Becky: Wow.

 

Matthew: Bless you Joan Jett. But you did not need that.

 

Becky: No, no, no, no, no, no.

 

Matthew: Joan Jett makes a very strange appearance. But the final lines, I just love because they're terrible. She goes something is changing. I can feel it building suspense. I am 17 now. Why can't you see it? 17 and you cannot stop me. 17 and you won't boss me. You cannot control me, father. Daddy's girl is a fucking monster and that is the end of the song. It is one of these that I am like, I know that they're bad lyrics, but deep down the very small angst part of me as a twenty nine year old is like, yeah, fuck em, fuck parents. Boom make money.

 

Becky: She is a monster. What? Please tell me. She turns into like some sort of weird. I don't know. I just picture like the Toxic Avenger. But a 16 oh 17 year old girl.

 

Matthew: Yeah. She is freer. She is sweeter and freer than 16.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: She did not turned into a monster. She ends up actually being. Actually, I think it is a very good metaphor for puberty because she is saying all these things in song form.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matthew: First of all, you took the time to create a song to convey your angst. That is a very teenage trait.

 

Becky: Oh, God, yes. Yeah.

 

Matthew: She does all of this. Then at the end of the movie, it turns out she is a big softie who like as her spoiler alert, dad dies. She is like, I love you, dad. I am sorry I was kind of an asshole. And I forgive you for lying to me about a debilitating condition that led you to lock me up for 16 years.

 

Becky: Okay, I have never been in that situation before, but clearly, the last time we heard about this, the girl killed her mother, just saying.

 

Matthew: That is true.

 

Becky: Yeah. Serving in time.

 

Matthew: Now, she is locked up in a different way.

 

Becky: Yeah. You are no longer free. So probably should have just left the house. Yeah. Okay, that is bad. Now I kind of want to see this at the same time.

 

Matthew: I do recommend it, but not because it is good.

 

Becky: Where did you see this? How did you see this?

 

Matthew: If anyone is interested in watching Amazon Prime, it is available. Just watch it.

 

Becky: Okay. Well, now I know what I am doing this week.

 

Matthew: Imagine if you really, really overfunded my chemical romance music video,

 

Becky: Oh God.

 

Matthew: So that is your aesthetic. Repo the genetic opera is absolutely the movie for you.

 

Becky: Oh, that is…

 

Matthew: Paris Hilton. Her best performance, arguably.

 

Becky: That is just awful. I cannot even like I bought this backpack. Then I realized, oh, my God, I am 46-year-old version of a vsco girl, unintentionally. Now I am, oh I kind of want to return.

 

Matthew: Wait, a what girl?

 

Becky: Vsco girl. Apparently, all these Instagram girls, it is a weird of crunchy, granola hippy kind of thing with really expensive accessories. Vsco is like a filter. You can run the photos through. Of course, all these girls do that.  It is like the backpack, like scrunches. Why? Anyone, want to bring that.

 

Matthew: [Inaudible 00:26:11]

 

Becky: I cannot even begin crocs in like Birkenstocks. It’s like, can we go in now on both of those? Sorry. No, no, no. No. Can do skis. What was the other thing? Oh, like a puka shell.

 

Matthew: Oh yeah.

 

Becky: Necklace kind of thing. I did not buy the $80 backpack. I went for the Chinese knockoff, but it is like that. Eighty-dollar Swedish backpack, which, by the way, somebody told me they got for their daughter. And she's like, and I looked inside. It is made in Vietnam. I was like, way to go, Sweden. Then I thought, well, had I known about that 6 years ago, I would have bought one when I was there. But no, no, no. I was like, oh, I am now this…

 

Mathew: Vsco girl.

 

Becky: Forty six year old vsco girl. I will put my hair up in a scrunches. Then there was some other accessories that I was like, Oh, sweet Jesus. There is one clothing company. That only makes one size. And it's like a size Barbie doll. I don't know. It is like a small. Then their clothes are like. It is like some Italian clothing company, Quartz.

 

Matthew: Yikes.

 

Becky: Which is funny because all the Italian ladies in my family were not Barbie size. But whatever, probably not their target market, but yeah, so.

 

Matthew: Wow. I mean, I, for one, am just grateful that I'm neither a vsco girl nor am 17 anymore.

 

Becky: Oh, thank God. Yeah, I don't even remember what… Oh, I do remember it as doing and it was not good. Properly better, pass that.

 

Matthew: You could have put all of your angst into a song and you would have felt properly much better.  

Becky: I would properly come up with shipoopi though, as opposed to that.

 

Matthew: I think we both are on par.

 

Becky: Yeah, we got it.

 

Matthew: We nailed what being 17 was like in two different decades.

 

Becky: Shipoopi. Oh, shipoopi. Yeah. All right. Well, I think that probably rounds out the old musicals. Thank God. So coming up next week, or next episode next week, episode, whatever. It all runs together right now.

 

Matthew: We will release it when we want.

 

Becky: When we feel like it. No pressure, please. So next time around, we are doing hip-hop.

 

Matthew: I am excited.

 

Becky: I had to kind of figure out what the definition really was, because for me, it was just straight up rap. But it's not cause I looked and Drake's in there and post Malone. I don't get that one at all. Beyoncé was in there, and like that's more like R&B stuff to me.

 

Matthew: Interesting.

 

Becky: R&B pop.

 

Matthew: I will be very curious to know what you choose.

 

Becky: Now, full disclosure, I do love me some Old-School Hip-Hop and by Old School, I mean like 80s. Cause I remember Fab 5 Freddy on MTV, which you have no idea who that is.

 

Matthew: I sure don’t.

 

Becky: Yeah, he was in Blondie video and she even mentioned him in it. Old school.

I can't remember, I think he was a rapper and M.C. but I can't remember it. Oh my god. My brain is fried and all of my friends who know are yelling right now. But yeah, I remember Fab 5, Freddy and then Yo!, MTV Raps and then it became the two Ed lover and Dr. Dre, but not the Dr. Dre we all know and love today. Yeah, so.

 

Matthew: This will be good because we are going to be getting that [Inaudible 00:30:14] and then I will be serving my purpose as the millennial on the podcast by bringing us back to 2008.

 

Becky: Oh, minus.  

 

Matthew: Wow. I just realized I am a 2008 freak.

 

Becky: Sticking with the year. I don’t even know when mine came out. I want to say it was late 80s, early 90s. So Yeah. All right. Well, that is something to look forward to, and I guess that is the end of this episode. And we will see you next time. When we ask What the Lyric?

 

[End 00:30:45]

 

In this episode, we bring our favorite bad lyrics from 1990 - 1999. One song from a group who don’t quite understand the meaning of bizarre.  And another from an artist who likes to rattle off a lot of ladies names in no particular order.

 

Episode2 What the Lyric – the 90s

 

[Start 00:00:00]

 

Becky Morrette and Matthew Seymour

 

[Music]

 

[Becky Morrette]: Welcome to what the lyric, the podcast that confirms, yeah, that actually made it to radio.

 

[Music]

 

[Becky Morrette]: Welcome to episode two of what the lyric where we dub into the really bad lyrics of the 90s. The 90s for me, that's when I graduated high school and went to college in San Francisco. So, let's see how much of the 90s I remember. How about you Matt?

 

[Matthew Seymour]: You know, I also don't remember much of the 90s, admittedly, for different reasons.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah

 

[Matthew Seymour]: Particularly since I was born in 1990.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh, Jesus.

 

[Matthew Seymour]: [Laugh] So I remember from about 95 on, and music was definitely not on my radar.

 

[Becky Morrette]: That's about when I remember it because I had stopped with the weed and the alcohol by then.

 

[Matthew Seymour]: You stopped? Once I found it. I never stopped.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh my God. That's another story. Off mic in case my parents are listening.

Yeah. My mother, side note, my mother, by the way, one time we were, she's going to love that I'm telling this. We were leaving a mall when I'd come home from school. And I looked over and I swear to God, the people in the car next to me were smoking a bowl. And my mom goes, I said, Dad, “are they smoking a bowl?” My father, being a high school teacher, knew the slang and my mom was like ´´smoking a bowl? How do you smoke out of a bowl? It's a bowl, I don't understand how you smoke out of this´´. And my father, very quietly said ´´You brought it up, you explain it´´.

[Matthew Seymour]: [Laughs]

 

 [Becky Morrette]: I didn't. I didn't at all.

 

[Matthew Seymour]: God bless your parents.

 

 [Becky Morrette]: A bowl? What? I don't understand how you smoke out of a bowl.

 

[Matthew Seymour]: How do you do something like that.

 

[Becky Morrette]: That is Ridiculous. What do mean? you can't. there is now to smoke it get something in a bowl. So, yeah, so that's enough about my mom.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: [laughs]

 

[Becky Morrette]: she's going to kill me. Yeah.

 

[00:02:12] inaudible

 

[Matthew Seymore]: What do you remember of the 90s music scene?

 

[Becky Morrette]: So at that point we, I, we I remember, Oh, this is a good one. I remember seeing I think it was house of pain and biohazard and somebody else on the same bill and that that was a big I don't know. That was early on in the night in the in the 90s.

I remember like Smashing Pumpkins. I remember Nirvana, all that all that stuff. Plus, I also remember In synch, the Backstreet Boys, the Brittany's. Oh, my God.

 

[00:02:53] inaudible

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Now you are talking my language.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh yeah. Oh, it's bad. It's just bad.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Who loves the 90s? We love.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I totally love the 90s and the 80s. There were a few in there that I was like, wow. I when doing the research for this, I was like, whoa, I forgot ice ice baby with ninety-one.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Wow.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I did not realize this.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. I mean. Hello. Talk about awful.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: [laughs]

 

[Becky Morrette]: But yet everybody knows it. And when that shit comes on everybody's up there dancing along.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I’m already dancing.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. You can’t not. You see you see the hair also M.C. Hammer.

 

 

[Matthew Seymore]: What? What?

 

 [Becky Morrette]: Yes. Can't touch this.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: As in Yeah. Which was why in I’m.

 

[Becky Morrette]: 90? I think. Right on there.

 

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Wow!

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. Yep. 90. I also saw him in San Francisco because he's an Oakland guy. It was right when he was kind of switching over to try and become hardcore. And then people were yelling. I felt so bad for the man. People were yelling stuff like You ain't shit. Ice-T is better. Like, whoever it was at the time, I can remember. And I was like, come on, man.

 

 

[Matthew Seymore]: It's M.C. Hammer, give him give him a break.

 

[Becky Morrette]: You had those hammer pants? We all had hammer pants.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: We all had photos of it.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh, my God. I still remember mine purple. Love those freaking pants.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: They looked comfortable.

 

 [Becky Morrette]: They were. I totally want some more now.I'm not going to lie because those things are great for Lounging. The Hammer, I'm trying to think who else was there? There was a bunch, but yeah those I was like, for real?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Oh yeah. The number one song when I was born was Sinead O'Connor’s,  Nothing compares to you.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Let me just say, but that's Prince.

 

[Matthew Seymore]:Yeah but this was Sinead O'Connor's cover.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I now I know. It's Prince though. I love Prince. I can't help it.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: You are not feeling the Sinead O'Connor?

 

[Becky Morrette]: I do. You know, I have that album. She had a couple other good songs on that.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Didn’t realize it.

 

[Becky Morrette]: But I cannot remember. Yeah, I said album I actually have a CD. Album/Cd it's all the same to me.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: [Laughs]

 

[Becky Morrette]: So which way did you skip? Did you go like metalish, like nirvanai? Or did you go pop?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: So here is how things shake out for me. I basically grew up Amish, not actually, but very little musical knowledge.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh, my God. Please tell me you did some like sort of. Biblical church song.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I knew a lot of, oh my gosh, I could tell you so many Christian single, like Pop singles.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Strippers.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Savage Gardens.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Which I believe I saw in concert. I'm not sure, though, that's been a while.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Oh, I'm going to have to think it's Stacy. Oh, I need to think of. There were there are a lot of people who crossed over.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah, they were.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: from Christian Pop to

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: just General pop.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Creed.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Yes! There we go.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I don’t think there was a crossover at all.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: It was just.

 

 [Becky Morrette]: I think that guy was a horn dog working every angle to become a pop guy.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I mean, Katy Perry did the same.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh, my God. I didn't know that.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: But that was not in the 90s.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh my god.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: So my musical knowledge basically spanned from the Beatles to

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[00:06:16] inaudible

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Clearwater Revival. Those were my parents

 

[Becky Morrette]: classic years.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: the entire Gap of 80s and 90s up until my sister started driving, and that was when I got the taste of  In Synch, Backstreet Boys, Britney Spears, Savage Garden, 98 degrees.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh! yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: That grouping. She left.

 

[Becky Morrette]:Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]:Like graduated left town. Another gap, I started driving, and that was 2007 onwards, so.  

 

[laughing]

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh my God that's awesome.

 

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I had to do some research for this and I did choose one that like, was something I definitely encountered on the radio quite a bit,

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh my god.

 

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Everyone encountered on the radio.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I can't wait because I wonder if I'll get it because there's you know, some blacked out moments in that decade for me.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I Fully expect that within the first three lines you will know exactly what song this is.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh. Okay. You may get mine.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Oh, I hope so.

 

[Becky Morrette]: You may. I have two but, the one is really easy. And that was ninety-one. And I had to look back at my yearbook and I thought I think this was our song, like the song that we chose, which would have been frightening if it was, but it wasn't. It was just as bad, but it was not.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Wait, the song you chose for graduation?

 

[Becky Morrette]: No. For like you have like for our yearbook. And oddly enough, there is a yearbook back there. It's not my graduation year, but it's one. It's  hilarious, I think it's eighty nine, So it doesn't play well into the 90s. But you the senior class got to pick like favourite car, favourite colour, best song, their favourite song. And the one that I think we chose was I want your sex.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Amazing.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Why not? Why not? Why wouldn't a bunch of horny 17 & 18 year olds pick I Want Your Sex by George Michael, who at that point no one thought was gay, which is another, I don't know how we missed that one as well.

 

[00:08:24] inaudible

 

[Becky Morrette]: White kids in upstate New York. No one gay. What?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: This was a New York City for crisis sake.

 

[Becky Morrette]: No. No. We all thought RuPaul was a woman.

 

[laughter]

 

1. Some people did.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: [laughs]

 

[Becky Morrette]: So, Yeah. So, I don’t think I’m going to do that one. I think I'm going to do the other one.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: What’s the year?

 

[Becky Morrette]:This one's ninety five.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Ok.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Maybe. Maybe.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: ok I was aware.

 

[Becky Morrette]: You might. Ok.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I think I'm ready whenever you are.

 

[Becky Morrette]: There is a video. This might give it away, but I’m going to say it anyways. The singer looked a lot like The Rock with more hair. All right brother Palaye in the back. Sweet Xena in the front. Cruising down the freeway in the hot, hot sun. Suddenly red, blue lights, flash us from behind, loud voice booming. Please step out onto the line. Palaye preaches words of comfort. Xena just hides her eyes. Policeman taps his shades. Is that the Chevy 69?

How bizarre? how bizarre? how bizarre? Which is the name of the song? By the way.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Wait, I have not heard this song,

 

[Becky Morrette]: OK,

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Ever.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Just go ahead and look up the, Just look up, it's OMC, is the name of the band. How bizarre, is the name of the song? And you will know when I say he looks like The Rock, like he's related to The Rock, and he might be, Same eyebrows,

 

[Becky Morrette]: [Laughs]

 

[Becky Morrette]: Same build almost like, like The Rock with more hair. There is no way.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: This is unbelievable.

 

[Becky Morrette]: [Laughs]

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I, Yeah. Look it up.

 

[Becky Morrette]: It's The Rock.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: This is exactly The rock with more hair.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: New Zealand musical group.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. Yeah. I think they, I thought it said they got to like number 20 or number 11 on the Billboard chart, I can't remember.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: WOW!

 

[Becky Morrette]: Just for the record, the other song I picked was from ninety-one, I want to sex you up, colour me bad, with two Ds because they were that bad.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: [Laughs]

 

[Becky Morrette]: That one is a is a dateline episode waiting to happen.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I'm beginning to sense the theme of

 

[00:10:55] inaudible

 

[Matthew Seymore]: movements in your songs.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I haven't even, I didn't even realize it. This one not so much. This is just bizarre. Like in the title. OK, so we've got a brother Palaye in the back. Sweet Xena, Zena, I can't remember.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: It's New Zealand  

 

[Becky Morrette]: It’s in the front. Yeah. Cruising down the freeway in the hot, hot sun. Now we're starting off pretty good. It was a summer song. I think it was released in the summer.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Although I will happily say that I thought he was describing his haircut when he said that it’s like, what was it, Zena in the front,

 

[Becky Morrette]: [Laughs]

 

[Matthew Seymore]: [Becky Morrette]: Brother Palaye in the back.

 

[Becky Morrette]: So, I'm still curious. Is brother like a biological brother? or are we talking like a Christian brother?

 

[00:11:34] inaudible

 

[Becky Morrette]: Like a priest kind of, you know,

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Very buttoned up.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Franciscan monk kind of situation.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I’m still going with haircut.

 

[Becky Morrette]: It could be. Then suddenly red, blue lights, flash us from behind, so now they're getting pulled over.

 

[00:11:49] inaudible

 

[Becky Morrette]: Not so much a great summer song. And then they told them to step out of the car. Palaye preaches words of comfort, so he might be a priest or some sort of religious man. This is the one that gets me, Policeman taps his shades. How many police officers pull you over and go Tick, tick, tick, tick, tick? Right on their aviators. I don't know a whole lot.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I just bought them today. Please compliment.

 

[Becky Morrette]: These babies cost a lot. And that's why I'm pulling you over, because I still need to get paid. How many then? Then the policeman ask us “Is that a Chevy 69’’?  And then the, the whole chorus is how bizarre? How bizarre? It's not really bizarre at all. If you were driving, doing something illegal or quite honestly in this day and age driving while black.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I feel like, [laughs] I feel like this is their use of how bizarre is really akin to

 

[00:12:50] inaudible

 

[Becky Morrette]:Oh,

 

[Matthew Seymore]: [Becky Morrette]: isn't that ironic?

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: But you are like No, this really isn't it bizarre.

 

[Becky Morrette]: It’s not Ironic at all or bizarre.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Once again or coincidental?

 

[Becky Morrette]:Oh, it gets bizarre, though. I will say. So, yes. So how bizarre they've gotten pulled over. Now the cop asked him. “That's a 69 Chevy’’?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: All right.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Seems like a reasonable

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Question

 

[Becky Morrette]: Question while being pulled over, followed by “Can I see your license and registration”? And also maybe is using the word bizarre wrong. But they're from New Zealand, they still speak English, so that's the same word in either.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: They should know by now.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Their country. Yeah.

The next part is destination unknown as we pull in for some gas. Hey, back on track for a good summer song. Freshly pasted poster reveals a smile from the past. Ok.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Wait. What?

 

[Becky Morrette]: Still kind of nice.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Where is the poster?

 

[Becky Morrette]: I don't know. Gas station. Which seems a little weird because that could be a wanted poster.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: So we left the cop behind.

 

[Becky Morrette]: We've already dealt with the ticket or whatever it was.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I see.

 

[Becky Morrette]: The pat down, I don’t know. We’re past that. We're moving on. We're getting some gas at this point. Maybe that's why he was pulled over the cop thought you guys are getting low on gas pull on over there. So now we get a freshly pasted poster, reveals a smile from the past. Okay. Here's where it gets bizarre. Elephants and acrobats, Lions, snakes, monkeys.

What?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Wait.

 

[Becky Morrette]: That's , the bizarre part for me. You have just now all of a sudden that, that's what's making you smile. Now, are we nostalgic because we went to the circus when we were a kid with our parents and oh, isn't that lovely? Or were we a circus performer?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I'm inclined to believe circus performer.

 

[Becky Morrette]: So am I. Paylaye speaks righteous, sister Zena says funky. What?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Righteous? Oh, my gosh. So he is, he's probably a priest.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. Funky. I don't know if I'd say funky.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Funky.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Funky. When thinking about elephants, acrobats, lions, snakes. And it's not even plural monkeys. It's just monkey. Yeah. Now we're back to the. How bizarre. Which is just starting to worry me a bit and I'm slightly starting to get a little creeped out.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Someone's on a trip.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I'm starting to think this is like American Horror Story the circus version. Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: We could do another podcast series on.

 

[Becky Morrette]: We could on that creepiness. And then it goes, oh, baby, oh, baby. It's making me crazy. It's making me crazy. It's not just you. It's making , i'm crazy with this. What the hell is this song about? And then he goes there every time I look around. Every time I look around. Every time I look around, it's in my face. What is in your face? What I don't understand. What's in your face? Is it a bug? Is it? [Laughs]

 

[Becky Morrette]: Sunburn?

 

[Matthew Seymour]: I'm sensing an acid trip.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymour]: Like the cop saw some drugs, pulled him over. It was too late. They ingested all of the drugs on the car, pulled them over, and they were like “we should probably pull over, take care of some things”. And now he's like, “oh, my God, I'm going to die because im so fucking high”.

 

[Becky Morrette]:  Wasn’t that super Troopers? [laughs]

 

[Matthew Seymour]: “Because I’m so fucking high”.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Didn’t he do that in super Troopers? [Laughs]

 

[Becky Morrette]: With a funnier outcome. This? Not so much. Nobody's down. And things of maple syrup and this. There's just elephants and shit.

 

[Matthew Seymour]: Just a shit ton of LSD.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. And then it goes to so, ok It's in his face. My face says confusion. Ringmaster steps out and says the elephants left town, people jump and jive, but the clowns have stuck around TV news and cameras. There is choppers in the sky. Marines, police, reporters ask where, for and why. Palaye yells, We're out of here. Zena yells, Right on. We're making moves in start and grooves. Before they knew we were gone. Jumping into this Chevy headed for big lights. Okay. Now, where are the elephants? Is that the Ringmasters way? Polite, kind of calm way of saying the elephants are loose and they're stampeding through your village and town. What? What the fuck happened in here?

 

[Matthew Seymour]: See here again. I am going back to my drug theory and say that the Ringmaster is actually the poor gas station attendant who's like, “Sir, your card has been declined”. And the guys are Like, “Who are you”? Why are the elephants not here”?

 

[Becky Morrette]: Why is that pink elephant running around in a tutu? And what are those camera people doing? Okay, that's probably the best thing. Here is the last line before it goes back into how bizarre, how bizarre. It's making me crazy. Every time I look around, it's in my face. I'm crazy. The last line. Want to know the rest? Hey, buy the rights. Why? Why would I buy the rights to this pile of shit? This isn't even a good like treatment for a movie. I don't even know what. This isn't even a good poem. [Laughs]

 

[Matthew Seymour]: It barely qualifies as a song.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. Yeah. And you didn't get a second hit. So clearly, really no one wanted the first one, although we all listened to in numbers and be like “how bizarre”?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: How bizarre?

 

 

[Becky Morrette]: How bizarre? Doo doo doo doo doo, I think is how the bizarre? How bizarre? All right. Yeah, I know. And it's like I need to look it up. It might be The Rock.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I feel like I have to love the shameless plug there at the end, because I mean, you know, like it takes it takes true artists. No. No amendment.

 

[Becky Morrette]: [laughs]

 

[Matthew Seymore]: It takes an artist to write good lyrics and put it to good music.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: It takes a true artist to just make any music and then say “Buy the rights”.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Here's the thing now. “By the rights”, I've had to listen to this song for free for years. It's just on the radio. Why would I buy the rights?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: So what I'm hearing is it hasn't worked yet.

 

[Becky Morrette]: No.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Well, tell them to replay it.

 

[Becky Morrette]: And then one of my favorite lines that kind of relates to this is Dennis Miller. He used to say when he's talking about things or buy one, get one free and he said  “two of  shit is still shit. If they really want to screw you, they give you a three”. That's what I feel like this song is right there. They've just given us three for free and it's still shit.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: That is the highest level of praise

 

[Becky Morrette]: [Laughs]

 

[Matthew Seymore]:that we can give to OMC’s is how bizarre.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. Yeah, so that's my that's my 90s.Awful lyrics.

 

[Matthew Seymore]:I love it.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I mean I will say this is one of those cases where it's like I can project things upon it. So like on the yikes scale, I am giving it like a two.

 

[Becky Morrette]: It's like a choose your own adventure song.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Exactly.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I now, if there really are elephants am a little more disappointed, I just desperately want to see the music video in which he just high as fuck, walking in a gas station and then everyone else around him is like

 

[Becky Morrette]: I got to, oh man, I feel like the music videos I'm just driving around in a convertible. Well, that's boring. Yeah. Well, 90s videos. I yeah. I can't remember. I do, I do have a flash of The rock. It's The Rock's cousin. I don't know who he is, but I'm just going to continue to call him The Rock’s cousin.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I cannot reiterate to look at that it

 

[Becky Morrette]: [laughs] it really does.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: because there's no other description for it.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I will put it up on the blog, but like a picture of The Rock and the lead singer on these side by side. Back in the heyday. And you will see that they are either separated at birth or really closely related.

[Matthew Seymore]: Also this would be a great time to plug the blog.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh the blog? Yes, that would be at whatthelyric.com all spelled out and not. We'll go ahead and say that again at the end of the episode.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: That sounds lovely.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I'm so good at that. I forget to plug things. Yeah. So OMD, how bizarre. I've lived with it for well over 20 years now and it's still I still sing it in the car when it comes on.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: You still hear it?

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh, yeah, yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: OMC, I sit OMD. I keep doing that.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I don't.

 

[Becky Morrette]: OMD is another band, Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark is what that one stood for. Also, like 80s band, I think late 80s or early 90s.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Come on.

 

[Becky Morrette]: But, Yeah. OMC, as in crap.

 

[Matthew Seymore]:  OMG for OMC. Oh my crap.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh my crap I think is what it stood for. I don't know. 1995 yeah. Over 20 years I listen to this song and now I hear it come on I go “how bizarre”? 

 

[Matthew Seymore]: how bizarre?

 

[Becky Morrette]: How bizarre? And then that’s it.

 

 [Matthew Seymore]: So low on the yikes, but high on the bizarre.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: That is where I am feeling it.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I think you're right on that one. It's just weird. [laughs]

 

[Matthew Seymore]: It is. It is weird. I need to listen to this.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: And watch it.

 

[Becky Morrette]: You're going to go home and then you're going to be like is that How bizarre part gets stuck in your head with the little like hook that they have the doo doo doo doo doo doo, whatever it is. I can't I can't remember. But that will get in your head and it will burrow deep and will hop out at many different times. Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I’ll be calling you tomorrow to be like fuck you introducing this song

 

[Becky Morrette]: [Laughs] how dare you and I never want to speak to you again. Yeah. Yeah, I agree.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Amazing. Well, this is actually an excellent Segway.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yes

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Into my pick, because it's also an Earworm.

 

[Becky Morrette]: OK, I'm ready.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: And just a wild hit across the board. So in the US, the song reached number 3 on the Billboard Hot 100.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Ok

 

[Matthew Seymore]: It’s from 1999, specifically April 1999.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Not that that I'll give you much context, but what I found most interesting was that it topped almost every chart in continental Europe, and set a record by staying at number 1 in France for 20 weeks, longer than any stay at the top spot ever on the US or UK charts.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Ok. If the French liked it, I am worried it has got to be cheesy.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Well, then I feel like we need to we need to get started to this because I really do think that you're going to get this at a moment’s botice.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Ok, I’m ready.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I'm omitting the first line only because it says the name of the song.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yes. No, it's all right. That's fair play.

 

[Matthew Seymore]:One, two, three, four, five. Everybody in the car. So come on, let's ride.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh, my God. Is this Coolio?  

 

[Matthew Seymore]:No.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Wait

 

[Matthew Seymore]: But to the liquor store around the corner, the boys say they want some gin and juice, but I really don't want a beer bus like I had last week. I must stay deep because talk is cheap.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Is it gin and juice?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: No. I like Angela, Pamela, Sandra in Reno.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh, Oh, Mambo number five.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Yes.

 

[Becky Morrette]: [Matthew Seymore]: [Laughs]

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I can't believe I confuse that for Gin and Juice is the only because you said Gin and Juice. Oh, sweet Jesus. I'm so sorry. Oh.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: [laughs]

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh, Oh my God. Well, of course the French would like it.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: [laughs] Again the highest praise that we can give to Mambo number 5.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh,

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Of course, is the French liked it.

 

[Becky Morrette]: what is that guy's name?

 

[Matthew Seymore]:Oh, do you want me to tell you?

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah

 

 [Matthew Seymore]: It is Lou Bega.

 

[Becky Morrette]: That's right. Talk about a one hit Wonder.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: who is German apparently sold himself as

 

[00:24:39] inaudible

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah

 

 [Matthew Seymore]: But 100% German.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah, I believe he had like a zoot suit on in that

 

[Matthew Seymore]: He absolutely did.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh

 

[Matthew Seymore]: The entire thing.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh, I wonder if he had worn wearing it for the seagulls in San Francisco that's no longer the store fronts.  It’s no longer there. WOW!

 

[Matthew Seymore]: This is just a hit for everyone. I mean, I've heard it played at weddings. [Laughs]Yeah.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. You can't not move to it.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Exactly.

 

[Becky Morrette]: You hate it, but you're still going to swivel. Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Everyone Loves the song. It's terrible. None of the lyrics make sense. Actually, let's look. Let's go back.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Let's dub into it. Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: So first, proving that he is at least able to count to 5.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yep. That's good. In English, and he is German.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: It's not like he is Cuban.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Everybody in the car, so come on, let's ride. That sounds fine.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Still fun summer song.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: To the liquor store around the corner. I'm like, so you got into your car.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Listen, in his defense, when I was in high school, we lived not that far from the high school. Like I should have walked. Did I? When I got a car? No, I did not. I would shovel the car out because I grew up in upstate New York. Shovel the shit off my car and drive to school.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: How many blocks?

 

[Becky Morrette]: Five. Five or six. Maybe. I mean, they're not like city blocks because it was upstate New York, but still maybe a half a mile at best.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Follow up question.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Would it have taken you longer to walk to school?

 

[Becky Morrette]: No.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Versus shovelling?

 

[Becky Morrette]: Not at all. Side note, I never dry my hair because I have crazy ass curly hair and so my hair would freeze if I walked to school.

 

[Becky Morrette]: [Matthew Seymore]: [ Laughs]

 

[Matthew Seymore]: That is a good way to keep it in place.

 

[Becky Morrette]: And surprising, I never really got sick, but yeah, I don't know why. You know, if you had a car in high school, you were a bad ass. Mine was a 1980 Mustang, which was not a bad ass car. But, you know,

 

[Matthew Seymore]: you had it.

 

[Becky Morrette]: and I had it. So I drove. So in his defense, I get it.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: We’ll allow.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah

 

[Matthew Seymore]: This next part just baffles me. The boys say they want some gin and juice. Okay. You're going to a liquor store. That makes sense.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: But I really don't want to slash next line beer bust like I had last week.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Well, you're not, you're going gin and juice.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: But I'm like, I suppose but am like then are you just saying I'm not really feeling beer guys.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Maybe he's just the driver. He's the designated driver. He's the D.D. of this situation.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: But then he even goes on to say, I must stay deep because talk is cheap. Where does that fit in? Also, the hearing, hearing little Lou Bega say “I must stay deep” when he's about to lift a tremendous number of women.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I was about to question with the stay deep in reference to his buddies or like he's got to stay deep with his homies. He's got to get in.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Earn the trust.

 

[Becky Morrette]: You know, he's gotta be right there with him. Or is he talking about the ladies he's about to rattle off?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: [laughs]

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I'm inclined to think the latter. So this is my Hashtag

 

[Becky Morrette]: [Matthew Seymore]: Me too Moment. [Laughs]

 

[Matthew Seymore]: He likes apparently, Angela, Pamela, Sandra and Rita, which I will fully say those are not 90s names.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Angela is. I had a friend whose name is Angela. I have a couple I used to know a couple of Angela's.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I feel like there needed to be more Ashley and Britneys .

 

[Becky Morrette]: Angela. What was the other one? Rita.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Rita.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Rita, I don't know who the hell, Rita. Now he's trying to take a spin on the Hispanic.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Yeah.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I'm Cuban.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Trust me yall.

 

 [Becky Morrette]: German\Cuban.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Pamela and Sandra?

 

[Becky Morrette]: No, I didn't, no that was a smith.  No, I don't know the other two.

[Matthew Seymore]: Yeah

 

[Becky Morrette]: I just had an Angela. That didn't sound right. I just knew an Angela.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Was she on your soccer team?

 

[Becky Morrette]: She was not. Not at all. I don't think. Oh, my God. I don't remember everybody on the soccer team that's really bad.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: And as I continue, you know, they're getting sweeter. In what capacity? gross.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I'm hoping he means in like personality, but I'm willing to doubt that. I'm willing.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: He is staying deep.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah, I'm willing to say the deep is in reference to the ladies. And eweh.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: so, what can I do? I really beg you, my lord.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Whoa, whoa.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Yeah.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Whoa.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Again, I think that's a call out to the Cuban community. I'm Catholic.

 

[Becky Morrette]: [laughs]

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Maybe

 

[Becky Morrette]: We could bring Brother Palaye back. [laughs]

 

[Becky Morrette]: Hold on, so now we're bringing in the Lord

 

[Matthew Seymore]: As the lady.

 

[Becky Morrette]: The lord as one of our priests used to say.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I mean, you have to bring him in because he wants to give the ladies enough time to sleep.

 

[Becky Morrette]: So, okay. Is he questioning like. Is he not gone for yet? Is he not done all these gone deep with all these ladies and he's like, please, lord, help me to remain the good man that I am and not take advantage of these ladies. [laughs]. I can't remember the rest of these lyrics.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Or is the Lord basically being like, I want you to bang as many of these dudes.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I’m out.

 

[Matthew Seymore]:  Well I guess they are not dudes they are ladies

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: because I don’t think Lou bega is swining that way.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I don't think, I mean, his 90s. That was on the cusp of when you were kind of like do we come out? I can't even. so, ok So he's not really into the beer

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Busts

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah

 

[Matthew Seymore]: No beer butst, No.

 

[Becky Morrette]: No.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: But apparently other busts

 

[Becky Morrette]: yeah

 

 [Matthew Seymore]: He’s very interested in.

 

[Becky Morrette]: And then he maybe that's his transition. And we just didn't get it quick enough.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Yeah, I still don’t get it.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. Yeah, I don't. Okay.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: It's been 20. No. Oh my God, it has been. Yeah, It's been 20 years. It has been 20 years since the song came out.

 

[Becky Morrette]: [laughs] And it's still on the radio from time to time.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Yeah

 

[Becky Morrette]: Okay. So we're not into the beer busts. we

 

[Matthew Seymore]: We are very into the ladies and staying deep in some capacity.

 

[Becky Morrette]: staying deep with the friends possibly, or the ladies maybe the friends are the ladies. That's why he's going.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Ohh

 

[Becky Morrette]: This could be all about the ladies.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: But he does say that the boys say they want some Gin and Juice.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh, well. So I had friends in college that I, it was a bunch of guys and my one friend would always call me bro because I had just become 

 

[Matthew Seymore]: A bro.

 

[Becky Morrette]: A bro to them at that point because I didn’t have boobs or anything they did, they looked at me as like one of them.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: One of them.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. I don't know.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I mean, it's totally fair. So he's brought in the Lord.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Either to remain celibate or to gain graces so that he can bang as many of these ladies as possible.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Does the lord work that way? I mean, would you pray and go, “you know what? God, I need your help getting some”.

 

[Matthew Seymore]:  And then the priest says, do 10 nail marys.

 

[Becky Morrette]: [laughs] I'm not going to lie. There is a priest we go up to camp, there was this cabin that my grandfather built. He had a really thick accent and he would he would say male Mary, full of grace or the Lord be with you. And of course, as kids, we'd all get laughing.

 So, yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I mean, that's hilarious. So I think he’s also,

 

[Becky Morrette]: You know, I think he's I don't think he meant it this way, though.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I think he's intending 10 Hail Marys in this. To me, so back to the lyrics.

 

[Becky Morrette]: yeah

 

[Matthew Seymore]: To me, it’s flirting, to me it’s flirting.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Ok

 

[Matthew Seymore]: So there is an adverb there

 

[Becky Morrette]: That’s where the English goes.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: It is just like sport, anything fly.

 

[Becky Morrette]: No. There is rules in sports.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Not when he's about to nail a bunch of ladies.

 

[Becky Morrette]: there's rules in sports. I mean, there is like red flags and yellow flags in all almost like football, in soccer.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I mean, this is a giant red flag.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: To me it’s flirting.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Well, again, English isn't his first language. Probably also why the French liked it so much. [laughs]

 

[Matthew Seymore]:  I apologize to like any other French people who listen to this song to learn English.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh my God, that is not. Yeah,

 

[Matthew Seymore]: It's all , It's all good. Let me dump it, please set in the trumpet, not send in the trumpet. Set. Please set in the trumpet.

 

[Becky Morrette]: So they left him a like a note for the mixers of this this song like hey, when you guys are mixing this down, set a trumpet in here.

 

[Matthew Seymore]:  Set it in the trumpet. Which for me I was like, let me dump it. Which I'm like, oh. Curious choice of words don't like that. Please set it on the trumpet. It sounds like he's also fucking the trumpet.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Actually, what I get from that, if you go back to the beer bust [laughs]is that  it's all in his stomach now.[laughs]  so he's literally, dumping it. And then the slang term for like the Cuban\Germans slang for toilet is trumpet. Maybe that's what I'm thinking.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: He as had too much gin and juice. He didn’t want a repeat on the beer busts.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yes.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: But now he is just puking away.

 

[Becky Morrette]: The beer bust has hit and he's got to find a bathroom Toot suite.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Oh, for a French

 

[Becky Morrette]: French.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: So maybe all the women are just the nurses [laughs]

 

[Becky Morrette]: could be

 

[Matthew Seymore]: who are caring for him.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: So I'll do the quiz.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Ok

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Do you do you remember who comes first?

 

[Becky Morrette]: It was Angela, Pamela. I can't remember the other Angela, Pamela. There was an S in there

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Think,

 

[Becky Morrette]: And then Rita.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Speed and Miss Congeniality.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh, Sandra.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Yes.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. Okay.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Now, funnily enough, in the actual chorus, only two of those ladies make it to the list of things he likes a little bit of.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Here's a thought. Could he be a pimp? [laughs]

 

[Matthew Seymore]: [gasps] That would make sense. He's driving the boys around being like, please survey the good.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Here's my ladies. [laughs]

 

[Matthew Seymore]: You know, that does kind of fit. And then it's like if they don't, you know, it's all good. He let me dump it and then he's like bye.

 

[Becky Morrette]: and then kick him out, they go with the lady.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: That's Angela. Angela did not make the cut.

 

[Becky Morrette]: She might have been off with one of his boys.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: And that showed, well, neither did Pamela. So apparently, Angela and Pamela are very popular.

 

[Becky Morrette]: They're either big winners or,

 

[Matthew Seymore]: or just they're off the payroll.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: So if the first one is a little bit of Monica.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh, that's right. He switches them again.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: A little bit of Erica. Where? By my side, a little bit of Rita is all he needs a little bit of Tina is what I see, which I find very interesting because he's seen so many women up to this point.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah

 

 [Matthew Seymore]: So Rita must be the big breadwinner.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Oh, yeah. She's raking it in.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. Monica, maybe they just changed their names to Monica and whatever the other one was because the other two names weren't really all that great.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Angela and Pamela.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: No offense to any Angela and Pamela.

 

[Becky Morrette]: But at that, you know, they're not like big moneymaking names probably.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Oh no.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah, No.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Now I'm thinking, you know who I really want to get with tonight?

 

[Becky Morrette]: Although,

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Pamela.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Pamela Anderson.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Oh shit, okay, fine.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Sorry. Pam.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: We will allow it. A little bit of Sandra in the sign. So she is only she is out of commission for the rest of the year.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Either that or she's just the billboard to bring them in.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Yeah. She is the pen out.

[Becky Morrette]: Yep.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: A little bit of Mary all night long. So has gotten the nail marries.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Here is where I am offended. That is my mom's name. How dare you?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Little a little bit of Mary all night long.

 

[Becky Morrette]: How dare you?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Even grosser. Because, like, why are you having all of Mary all night long?

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah, well, I have known men that cannot really handle all night long. You know, I am just saying.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: So maybe they should just go to be just in the sun.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Small, small time period.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Let it be a little bit of Jessica. Here I am. Which is weirder because that definitely feels like a sex.

 

[Becky Morrette]:  He just shows up. Hey Jessica. Here I am. That stalker.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Stalker Lubanga.

 

[Becky Morrette]:  Yeah, right.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: A little bit of you makes me your man.

 

[Becky Morrette]:  Now, this is problematic because you don't know who's listening to this on yet. Male. Female. I could have my cat listening.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: And he is bestiality. What we are learning from this song is that Lubanga will fucking anything with a pulse.

 

[Becky Morrette]:  It is what it sounds like, yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: And then and then it says mambo number five. And I think there is that. Yeah. With all the bap bap

 

[Becky Morrette]:  But he missed it with the trumpets because that is where the trumpets go.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Yeah, I now. But then he was like I'm going to plug momma number five. Very interesting fact. The sampling from the actual mambo number five gets played in the song and the person who actually wrote the original Motown number five was a co-writer of the song.

Co-author. Yes. Songwriters, it was Damaso Perez Prado.

 

[Becky Morrette]:  That is probably Lou.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I know, and then Lou Bega, they are two separate entities.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Are they?

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I mean, we can't prove it.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Are they now?

 

[Matthew Seymore]:  And then we go, back to you, John. Well, no, rather jump up and down and move it all around. So we're trying to dance. Shake your head to the sound. Put your hand on the ground. Take one step left and one step right. We are playing Twister.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah, I know.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: One to the front and one to the side. Clap your hand once and clap your hands twice, wow! I remind you, one hand out on the ground.

 

[Becky Morrette]: One hand out on the ground, and we have now answered the question. What's the sound of one hand clapping?

 

[Both Speakers]: It is mambo number 5.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: And I desperately wanna watch the video, because then the lyric says, and if it looks like this, then you're doing it right. Which means at some point in the video…

 

[Becky Morrette]: I don’t think he is doing anything. If I remember correctly, it is him. It's a white background and a whole bunch of ladies dancing around. I don't think there's a specific dance that they're doing, but I could be wrong.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Then Lou Bega has really fucked it up.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Well, I mean, clearly.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: So then. And speaking of fucking things, he goes back to going through. Monica. Erica. Rita, Tina, Sandra's, Mary, Jessica and a little bit of you makes me your man. Trumpet the trumpet, Mambo number five. Again, another instrumental break. And then he's like a little bit of Monica, Erica, Rita, Tina, Santa, Mary, Jessica, a little bit of you makes me your man. And lastly, but certainly not least, I do all to fall in love with a girl like you because you can't run and you can't hide. You and me going to touch the sky, Mambo number 5.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Okay, here is what I am sensing. We've only done two episodes. Very clearly. There is a me too movement situation that is happening in almost every shitty song that is popular.

 

[Matthew Seymore]:  Yeah. And I'll be honest. Like I knew this was skeezy going into it.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]:  But I have never once heard the lyrics cause you can't run and you can't hide. You and me are gonna touch the sky. Sounds like a murder suicide… No, it sounds like a stalker then a murder suicide.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Dateline. All of these songs like Colour Me Balance is a Dateline episode waiting to happen. How bazaar is just bizarre. These are all.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: So far you have had the only one that was not a hashtag me too moment.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Wait until next episode.

 

[Both Speakers]: Oh, that will be good one.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah. No, I can't even… Like they are all me too movement. I have not heard like the songs that I have found that I really like. These lyrics are shitty are typically because they're like borderline dateline.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Oh yeah. I'd like to catch a private.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Oh God. Yes. Yes.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Across the board.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Now we are on the on the yuck scale of things in the yikes scale.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Yuck would also work.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yuck / yikes on this one.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: The problem is like it is an earworm.

 

[Becky Morrette]: It is, and everybody will at a wedding be like one,

 

[Both Speakers]: two, three, four, five.

[Becky Morrette]:  Mom’s up there dancing. Grandma is up there, shimmy and shaken. And no one is really paying attention to how awful

 

[Matthew Seymore]: These lyrics are

 

[Becky Morrette]:  Yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Which is very interesting because it is a crowd favourite yet no one is paying attention to this dude is literally just naming any women he wants to have sex with

 

[Becky Morrette]: Now that makes me think that I would like to write a pop song and just start rattling off men's names.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Done.

 

[Becky Morrette]: I am going to work on that. That will be my next, you know,

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Next project.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Next project

 

[Matthew Seymore]:] join us for the next series.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Next podcast

 

[Matthew Seymore]: In which we collectively list the names of men you would like to have sex with.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Where we just start writing our own shitty lyrics.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: It cant be that hard.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Clearly not. Lee Croix I am looking at you post Malone. Sue, I'm going to say this is probably like a 3 for me.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I will say the only thing that tone that down from being a 4 is dance ability. Like not giving a pass on the grossness of it, but I will say have a dance to this. Yes, will continue to dance to it? Yeah. But the lyrics are just bad.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Well yeah. It's like the Robin Thicke one. The Blurred Lines. It's the same feel. Not as rapey but the same feeling.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: So again tagline for momma number five, Blurred Lines but less rapey.

 

[Becky Morrette]: The 90s version of Blurred Lines, which is a little less, rapey.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Have you wanted to listen to Blurred Lines but wanted to be less rapey? Have you tried Lou Bega.

 

[Becky Morrette]: But you did not want the over rapeyness of it.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Check out Lou Bega mambo number 5.

 

[Becky Morrette]: He is into Blurred Lines with mambo number 5, and then work your way up to, yeah.

 

[Matthew Seymore]:  I am inclined to agree. This is a middle of the road. Yikes.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Yeah, this was absolutely a total. Oh yeah. 3. Oh yeah. Oh, it is making my stomach a little queasy now, I am going to have to use trumpet for toilet, from now on. It is just gonna happen.

 

[Matthew Seymore]:  I have gotta go to the trumpet.

 

[Becky Morrette]: Kids going to the trumpet. I'll be right back. I am going to play a little solo. This is just going downward from here.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: Quality material.

 

[Becky Morrette]: And on that note, thank you for listening to Episode 2. Please stay tuned. We will have Episode 3, which will be musicals. We're going to go deep into musicals. That was the wrong word to use there. After mambo number five.

 

[Matthew Seymore]: I mean how do we solve that problem like Maria.

 

[Becky Morrette]:  Although Oh, God, never see Matt and I am not going to, But I still know all the words. Yes, we are going to look at musicals and it is going to be epic. So thanks for joining us and we will see you soon.

 

[End 00:44:37]

 

 Episode #1 Description

 

Welcome to “What the Lyric?!?” In this episode, we bring our favorite bad lyrics from Pop Music (c. 2016-2019). One song from an artist who desperately wants to fix her “Reputation” with some cringe-y spoken-word lyrics. And another from a Brit whose time would best be spent learning to “let go” of the booze.

 

Transcript of Episode #1

 

Becky: Welcome to What the Lyric?!? -- the podcast that confirms...yeah, that actually made it to radio.

 

Matt: Is it recording?

 

Becky: Oh now we’re recording. Oh fun!

 

Matt: Oh yay!

 

Becky: Hello everybody and welcome to What the Lyric?!? where we talk about how much we love awful, awful lyrics. A little bit about me: I’m Becky. I will listen to anything once, and over and over again if it’s really bad. And then there’s Matthew over here, my partner in crime…

 

Matt: You know, honestly, if you had to summarize my musical tastes, the best way to look at it would be to say that my go-to karaoke song is “Promiscuous” by Nelly Furtado ft. Timbaland.

 

Becky: So you know we have good taste. That goes without saying. How this whole podcast is going to work is...We have one song each that {...} we get to pick off the theme of the episode. Today’s theme is Pop Music from 2016 to 2019. We get to do a dramatic reading, and after the dramatic reading, we talk about why the lyrics are SO bad and why we had to call it out. All right, so starting first is...Matthew.

 

Matt: Okay.

 

Becky: Get ready.

 

Matt: Definitely get ready for this. So I chose a song...just to give you a little context for this: it comes from, I believe, August of 2017. So put yourself in that state of mind. It’s a year after the election; things are terrible...still.

 

Becky: I was probably high.

 

Matt: I mean, weren’t we all?

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matt: It is Seattle.

 

Becky: You’d have to be.

 

Matt: And so this person has decided to reshape their image and, you know, I’ll just let the lyrics speak for themselves:

 

“I don’t like your little games

Don’t like your tilted stage

The role you made me play

Of the fool, no, I don’t like you

I don’t like your perfect crime

How you laugh when you lie

You said the gun was mine

Isn’t cool, no, I don’t like you (oh!)”

 

Matt: And that’s the first stanza.

 

Becky: Okay, so I’m guessing… Who’d be packing heat in 2017, you said? August?

 

Matt: Uh huh. Changing the image!

 

Becky: Could be… Oh! Changing the image? Only because of the changing image thing, that would be Taylor Swift?

 

Matt: Correct.

 

Becky: Oh the Swifties.

 

Matt: But do you...do you know the song?

 

Becky: Oh Jesus! Is it that...It’s the one where she then breaks it down and says, “Oh, Taylor Swift isn’t here right now. Because she’s dead!” Something along those lines? *Laughs*

 

Matt: This would be “Look What You Made Me Do” by Taylor Swift.

 

Becky: Oh yes. *Repeats the phrase “Look What You Made Me Do” twice.* Or however the rest goes.

 

Matt: Exactly. And really, my choice for all of the songs in this podcast are based on what I like to call “Cringecore.”

 

Becky: I love that. We are going to copyright that.

 

Matt: *Laughs* Really any songs that have lyrics that [make you go] “Oh!” You’ve heard of cringe comedy; that’s kind of how I view these lyrics.

 

Becky: I like it.

 

Matt: And specifically the -- what makes this so cringey is what you already mentioned, the, let’s find it…”I’m sorry the old Taylor can’t come to the phone right now” set to the background music of, “Ooh, look what you made me do.” “Why?” “Oh ‘cause she’s dead!

Becky: The old Taylor is, like, what? 23? 24? I mean, she’s not old.

 

Matt: She’s got a guitar. I mean, her…

 

Becky: She’s country. Country Taylor.

 

Matt: She’s Country-Pop.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matt: Don’t you remember when it was just a love song, baby?

 

Becky: Oh man. Oh God. Ohh...Getting a little gag reflex going.

 

Matt: And don’t forget the “I knew you were trouble.”

 

Becky: Oh is that the one with the turtle sex noise meme?  *Laughs*

 

Matt: *Laughs* That is exactly what that is. *Laughs*

 

Becky: My favorite ever!

 

Matt: So really Taylor...I had a lot of options, just based on Taylor, but I have to admit, the lyrics are just...a mess. Let’s keep it going. I mean, we’ve already heard the first stanza.

 

Becky: Oh yeah.

 

Matt: But then she continues to say she doesn’t like being the fool, but “[she] got smarter, [she] got harder in the nick of time.”

 

Becky: How does one get harder when they’re carrying their cat around everywhere? I see a lot of photos of her with her cat. Don’t get me wrong, [I’m a] crazy cat lady, but I’m not taking Kink with me...My cat’s name is Kinky Disco. I’m not taking Kink with me to the grocery store, to the gym...Okay, I don’t go to the gym, but like, I’m not taking her out on a night on the town.

 

Matt: Unlike Taylor Swift, which I will also say I find it interesting that for a woman whose last name is Swift, she didn’t choose “faster” for the lyric. Like, that would have made AS much sense… “But I got smarter, I got faster in the nick of time.” Okay! I’ll still take that!

 

Becky: She got badder? I’ve never heard her swear! I’ve never seen her not smile.

 

Matt: She doesn’t swear in this song either. The real question, and we can answer this question at the end of the analysis, but what, what, WHAT did we make her do? I’m just very curious.

 

Becky: Maybe make her carry a cat around all the time. *Laughs*

 

Matt: *Laughs* We did this to ourselves.

 

Becky: Maybe she has to date all these DJs. Maybe we forced that on her with our expectations of her music and turtle sex noises.

 

Matt: And her Starbucks lovers!

 

Becky: Oh God, that’s right.

 

Matt: “But honey, I rose up from the dead. I do it all the time.” Necromancer, interesting. “I’ve got a list of names and yours is in red, underlined. I check it once, then I check it twice. Oh.”

 

Becky: Wait, what does that mean? What are you doing? You checked it. Yup, still there.

 

Matt: Based on the lyrics alone, we have realized that she has gotten harder in the nick of time and also, presumably, become an elf of the Santa variety. She’s making lists; she’s checking them twice. Don’t know why she’s using a red pen.

 

Becky: Well it is festive. Red -- Christmas-y.

Becky: See I can’t get past the “hard” part. She’s not like, all of a sudden, turned to Nicki Minaj-hard. Or like, back in the day, Lil Kim hard.

 

Matt: She’s not going to be Beyonce carrying around a baseball bat, breaking windows.

 

Becky: No, but she did bust out the band, the marching band.

 

Matt: Oh we can always get into that!

 

Becky: I saw that! I saw that!

 

Matt: But if that’s the case, then she still did not get harder in the nick of time because she’s still following Beyonce.

 

Becky: Yeah. And pink isn’t really a “hard” color for me. Like, it’s not a color I go, “Oh! I see Notorious B.I.G. is wearing pink. He’s hard.” That isn’t why I would have classified him as hard. I don’t think I’ve ever seen B.I.G. [in pink.] Maybe he did? I don’t know; I’d have to go back and look now.

 

Matt: *Laughs*

 

Becky: I feel like I’d have to look that up. *Laughs*

 

Matt: And then really, the rest is chorus, which in case you haven’t realized it, is just: “Ooh, look what you made me do. Look what you made me do. Look what you made me do. Look what you just made me...OOH, Look what…” Okay, I think we’ve got the idea.

 

Becky: I feel like someone got lazy. I feel like that happens a lot in lyrics. And that’s lazy.

 

Matt: Which part?

 

Becky: The just repeating the same line over and over and over again.

 

Matt: Yeah, it’s not a good look. And worse, is the next stanza:

 

“I don’t like your kingdom keys” Kingdom keys.

 

Becky: Keys? As in house keys? Car keys?

 

Matt: Yeah, apparently someone’s got a kingdom.

 

“They once belonged to me.”

 

Becky: Okay.

 

Matt: Uhhh, questions?

 

“You ask me for a place to sleep

Locked me out and threw a feast”

 

And the best part of this is at the very end of the line is, “What?!” So even Taylor looked at these lyrics, “Locked me out and threw a feast...WHAT?!” And they just included it.

 

Becky: Yeah, they said fuck it. It’s Taylor Swift; it’s going to be huge. That’s exactly how it happened.

 

Matt: And ultimately, it was.

 

Becky: I know!

 

Matt: “The world moves on, another day, another drama, drama

But not for me, not for me, all I think about is karma

And then the world moves on, but one thing’s for sure (sure)

Maybe I got mine, but you’ll all get yours.”

 

Becky: All of a sudden we’ve gone from one person to all?

 

Matt: Oh yeah. So whoever took her kingdom keys apparently stole her keys, stole her kingdom and was like, “No bitch, you don’t live here anymore.”

 

Becky: Could kingdom keys *laughs* be a metaphor for virginity, here?

 

Matt: But then which one? Which one of the Starbucks lovers is guilty of that.

 

Becky: *Laughs* I wish I had kids so that I could be like, “Kids, keep your kingdom keys as long as you can. Just lock them away.”

 

Matt: “Your chastity belts won’t rust. Don’t worry.”

 

Becky: “Just keep those kingdom keys to yourself and be sure to give them to the right person.”

 

Matt: Abstinence-only education.

 

Becky: “And if you are going to give them away, just keep them protected.”

 

Matt: Just keep them on a carabiner.

Becky: *Laughs* Those Schneider keys that had the chain you could just pull and snap back.

 

Matt: Exactly!

 

Becky: Keep them safe. You’ve got to know where they are at all times.

 

Matt: Taylor did not follow that advice. She is thinking about karma apparently. She’s not going to do anything about how angry she is, which again really contradicts the meaning of the song.

 

Becky: The “Look what you made me do”!

 

Matt: Exactly. She’s like, “Oh karma will take care of it. I won’t do anything about it except sulk.”

 

Becky: I’m going to sit and just bitch about it.

 

Matt: Yeah. And honestly, the rest of the song. A) It goes back to, “I got smarter, I got harder in the nick of time.” Return to that and then another amazing chorus of “Look what you made me do.” And the final, original set of lyrics is:

 

“I don’t trust nobody and nobody trusts me.

I’ll be the actress starring in your bad dreams.

I don’t trust nobody and nobody trusts me.

I’ll be the actress starring in your bad dreams.”

 

And it just repeats until it transitions flawlessly into “Ooh, look what you made me do.”

 

Becky: Taylor. Taylor, I get that you’re young, probably started partying, started drinking a little bit and that’s where this came from, maybe. I don’t know.

 

Matt: Girl’s nearly in her 30s.

 

Becky: Yeah, I don’t get it.

 

Matt: Britney had a weird stage; I’ll allow Taylor one, but this was a…

 

Becky: Britney had a good one because she shaved her head.

 

Matt: *Laughs* She put on a show!

 

Becky: *Laughs* She is a showman through and through. Like, she shaved her head, tried to attack somebody with an umbrella…

 

Matt: I don’t remember the umbrella…

Becky: Oh yeah, that was after she shaved her head. I think she went for somebody’s car window because they were taking photos of her in the car, so she went for that. Yeah. That’s a good photo to look up. It’s priceless.

 

Matt: That’s the next segment.

 

Becky: Yeah, that’s the second podcast. Photos of people going crazy.

 

Matt: That’s the first one!

 

Becky: Okay, so I think, universally, this song is incredibly awful. I think we can both agree.

 

Matt: Do we have a rating for this?

 

Becky: I would say she’s mild. Like, on a scale of 1 to 5 -- like, 5-star spicy crappy lyrics -- she’s probably right in the middle there.

 

Matt: I am inclined to agree.

 

Becky: It’s like a 3-4.

 

Matt: Right. It depends on your own taste buds, your ethnicity. Certainly when it comes to this song.

 

Becky: Oh god, yeah.

 

Matt: Honestly, on a scale of 1 to 5 yikes, I’m inclined to give it a 3. What nudges it toward 4 is the spoken lyrics...

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matt: “The old Taylor can’t come to the phone right now.” “Why?” “‘Cause she’s dead.” And then I just hear the teenager in me slam the door and yell, “You’re not my real mom and you never will be!”

 

Becky: *Laughs* I will say, also, [those lyrics are] my favorite part of the song.

 

Matt: It’s only the original part of the song!

 

Becky: It really is! It really is. That’s like her acting out. And you’re like, “Oh. Ohh. Taylor got edge.”

 

Matt: To be honest, what would have kept it at a 3, if they would have just deleted the spoken word portion. This would have been a goth “Call Me Maybe.”

 

Becky: Yeah. Ooh, yes! I like that. I agree with you on that one. So we’re going a solid 3 to 4 yikes on the awful lyrics scale.

 

Matt: I am inclined to agree. It’s not the worst. It’s certainly not the best lyrics.

 

Becky: It’s definitely not. *Noise of a truck* Sorry for the trucks in the background, people! This is what happens when you record in an old building. Alright, so mine...Honestly, I don’t know when it came out. This song is the reason this podcast is existing because my coworker heard me bashing these lyrics and said, “Oh my god, please record this.” So Ellen, here you go!

 

Oh God, how do I do this? Okay:

 

“I met you in the dark, you lit me up

You made me feel as though I was enough

We danced the night away, we drank too much

I held your hair back when

You were throwing up

 

Then you smiled over your shoulder

For a minute, I was stone-cold sober

I pulled you closer to my chest

And you asked me to stay over

I said, I already told ya

I think that you should get some rest”

 

Becky: And then it goes into the chorus. Go ahead, see if you can guess this one. Yeah.

 

Matt: I’m going to need some more lyrics.

 

Becky: I’m going to go into the chorus right now:

 

“I knew I loved you then

But you'd never know

'Cause I played it cool when I was scared of letting go

I know I needed you

But I never showed

But I wanna…”

 

Becky: I can’t even get to this part without laughing.

 

“But I wanna stay with you until we're grey and old

Just say you won't let go

Just say you won't let go”

 

Becky: ...Which is the name of the song.

 

Matt: Ohhhh my God.

 

Becky: That is James Arthur’s “Say You Won’t Let Go.” Now James Arthur, if I remember correctly won, like, X Factor, which is a British TV show like…

 

Matt: America’s Got Talent?

 

Becky: Yeah! I think it’s something similar.

 

Matt: Are there buttons?

 

Becky: There are people who are guest judges or whatnot. I think it might just be music, so it’d be like an American Idol situation. And [this song] is one of the more popular wedding songs, which I find offensive.

 

Matt: Oh no.

 

Becky: Yes! Yes, this is played at weddings. People pick this as their wedding song. So I’m going to go ahead and we’re just going to start again. So he starts with:

 

“I met you in the dark, you lit me up

You made me feel as though I was enough”

 

Sweet enough sentiment. Right?

 

Matt: I will say it sounds like they’re both getting high at a party, which I’m just like, “Oh okay.”

 

Becky: They’re young. They can do that. I mean, I don’t remember the last time we’d dance the night away. Here’s where I start to have some issues with this being at all a good song and even a wedding song, where he says:

 

“I held your hair back when

You were throwing up”

 

Now, there’s so many things here for me. You just met her and now you’re holding her hair back. While she’s puking.

 

Matt: Wow.

 

Becky: Do you want to be with a girl who can’t handle her booze is my number one question. *Laughs* Like, is that a thing?

 

Matt: I mean, I have to hand it to him. I can definitely see a couple of things wrong with the dating culture. Number one -- women who look at this song and think, “You know what? I’m just looking for a man who’s going to hold my hair back 30 minutes after I’ve met him.”

 

Becky: She’s gotten to that point. It’s like in Singles where she’s like, I was looking for all these things, and now I’m just looking for a man who says “God bless you” instead of “Gesundheit” when they sneeze. That’s where she’s at.

 

Matt: I mean, it’s a pretty low threshold.

 

Becky: Yeah.

 

Matt: But I also think it’s very much a critique on straight men who are like -- there’s no such thing as a red flag to me. She’s vomiting in a toilet? I bet I could get laid tonight!

 

Becky: She is so beyond her means; if anything, we’re going in for the kill. Okay, so now it says:

 

“You smiled over your shoulder”

 

Becky: All I can picture at this point is puke-face, which is puke stuck in the teeth, her make-up is now down around her cheeks, she’s got raccoon-face. She is that girl at the end of the night who is missing a shoe. And is holding the other one in somebody else’s shoe in her hand. Her purse is open; shit spilling out all over the place. That’s the girl I’m picturing, and you’re like…”Yeah.”

 

Matt: Say you won’t let go!

 

Becky: *Laughs* This is the girl for me. Forever. No. No, I can’t...And a wedding song! I’m going to keep saying this. This is a wedding song. People pick this for their freaking wedding.

 

Matt: See, what I love about that is that it explicitly gives the couple permission to drink too much, to dance the night away. And THEN, as she’s puking, he’s going to be like, “It’s like the first night we met!” *Laughs*

 

Becky: Open bar at this wedding! Very clearly. We’re not going to have food, just booze because we’re going to relive our first night. I can’t. And then he says:

 

“For a minute, I was stone-cold sober”

 

Becky: Now, when you sobered up for that second, did you go, “What the fuck am I doing?” Because that’s [when] I would have gone, “What am I doing? Why? This girl is puking and I’m holding her hair back and that’s the girl I think…”

 

But then he went, “Nope! We’re good. I don’t know what that was about. I’m pushing that to the back. Pushing it to the back. That is not a red flag in any way.” I don’t get it. And clearly, puke-face is a turn-on for this guy because then he pulls her close.

 

Matt: He’s got a thing.

 

Becky: *Gagging noises* It’s giving me the gag reflex thinking about it. Then he says:

 

“And you asked me to stay over

I said, I already told ya”

 

Classy. He’s good.

 

Matt: Wow.

 

Becky: Yeah:

 

“I said, I already told ya

I think that you should get some rest”

 

Becky: Now I’m not sure if he’s just being nice because she just lost the contents of her entire stomach in front of him and he doesn’t want to embarrass her any more or he’s like, “I’m going to go in for the kill even though I said ‘Let’s just get some rest.’”

 

Matt: He’s closing the deal. Honestly, if he cared, he’d be like, “We’re going to get you some water and medical attention.”

 

Becky: This is a “Me Too” movement issue.

 

Matt: Yeah, a #MeToo moment.

 

Becky: And then he goes on: “I knew I loved you then.” Got to be a fetish. Like, puke-face fetish. I don’t know. Not anything I go for. “But you’d never know.” Yeah because she’s black-out drunk. Who remembers during black-out drunk-ness? And then he says: 'Cause I played it cool when I was scared of letting go.” Yeah because she could die of alcohol poisoning. *Laughs* There could possibly be a death that your fingerprints are on the body now.

 

Matt: He’s scared of letting go and yet, at no point does he think, “You know, there are medical professionals who are paid to take care of this.”

Becky: Yeah, maybe urgent care. That’s all I’m saying.

 

Matt: She deserves better at this point.

 

Becky: Yeah, and then he goes into, “I know I needed you.” More like she needed you rather than the other way around?

 

Matt: Yeah, she needed you in the same sense that she needed to be hydrated.

 

Becky: Yeah, maybe needed to be told, “Maybe not that last drink.”

 

Matt: Exactly. And this is going to be a bad decision.

 

Becky: Stop spinning while you’re dancing. Doing that little spinny-dance. That hippie dance thing. I don’t know. I don’t dance. I have no idea what the kids do these days. So then we go into the he wants to stay with her when she’s gray and old.

 

When you’re gray and old and you’re still puking into a toilet, holding her hair back. That’s old.

 

Matt: My brain went the opposite direction. Of course he’s excited for her to get gray and old because then all sorts of bodily functions go haywire. He definitely has a kink for this.

 

Becky: He’s waiting for the diaper stage.

 

Matt: Yep. 100%.

 

Becky: So then we get to the next bit:

 

“I'll wake you up with some breakfast in bed

I'll bring you coffee with a kiss on your head”

 

This is an intervention. She’s daydrinking; she’s hungover. That’s what this has to be.

 

Matt: Too many damn mimosas.

 

Becky: “And I'll take the kids to school.” ...Because Mom’s had too much Mom-juice? What is happening here? Now we’ve established there’s a cycle. There’s a problem. “Wave them goodbye.” Because Mommy’s going to rehab and you’re not going to see her for a little while is what I’m getting. I could be wrong. “And I'll thank my lucky stars for that night.” The puke night? You’re thanking your stars because now you are having to take over care -- ALL the care of your kids -- because your wife can’t get out of bed because she’s been day-drinking and going on the Mom-juice.

 

Matt: Alright, two things. Well, actually, two kinks really come out of this. Number one, he definitely has a thing for girls who are messes. Like, full-on messes. Number two, the dude was playing long-game. If I can get with an alcoholic woman, enable it…

 

Becky: There will be diapers sooner [rather] than later!

 

Matt: Exactly. *Laughs* And I cannot wait to get custody of the kids who don’t exist yet. So...interesting, James Arthur.

 

Becky: Maybe that’s all he wanted was kids. And he just needed some drunk, crazy lady that would believe anything he said to her just to get those kids.

 

Matt: I hate to say it, but I know a fair number of straight women who, if a dude held their hair back, they’d be like, “Aw, he’s got a caring, tender soul.”

 

Becky: Yeah, I probably would have said that in my twenties. I’m also 45 now, so I’m like, “There’s something wrong with this guy.”

 

Matt: That’s because it’s amazing when you get out of your twenties...the clarity through which you can see the world!

 

Becky: Oh my God, yeah. Okay, so then we go back into the whole, “When you looked over your shoulder. For a minute, I forget that I'm older.” And here’s where I become an asshole for picking this song because the next line is, “Because you’ve been too busy hiding her alcoholism from the family.” The song’s about alcoholism! People are playing this for weddings! Again, top wedding song -- alcoholism is mentioned in the lyrics.

 

Matt: Wait, repeat that exact lyric.

 

Becky: “Because you’ve been too busy hiding her alcoholism from the family.”

 

Matt: Wait, who is? He is?

 

Becky: He is. His whole little stanza is:

 

“When you looked over your shoulder

For a minute, I forgot that I'm older

Too busy hiding her alcoholism from the family.”

 

Matt: This took a turn…

 

Becky: I know! I’ve never gotten past the first stanza where he’s holding her hair and she’s puking. No idea that they would all of a sudden mention alcoholism. THEY MENTION ALCOHOLISM. How is this a wedding song? You people have got to listen past the first stanza. And then it goes into, “I wanna dance with you right now.” I’m assuming now because shouldn’t she be in rehab? And then, “Oh, and you look as beautiful as ever. And I swear that everyday'll get better.” Everyday’ll. That’s everyday, apostrophe, L, L. Get better. “You make me feel this way somehow.” I don’t know. What would that way be? Afraid of drinking?

 

“I'm so in love with you

And I hope you know

Darling your love is more than worth its weight in gold.”

 

Now we’ve just completely gone past the alcoholism. That was just a little blip. Just a little mention.

 

Matt: Just going to drop that in as a reminder.

 

Becky: Yeah. Then this one gets me, “I wanna live with you/Even when we're ghosts.” Really?

 

Matt: That’s eternity.

 

Becky: That’s really...no.

 

Matt: I have yet to meet a single person in my living life who I would want to spend an actual eternity with.

 

Becky: I don’t want to spend that much time with my cat.

 

Matt: Ah! But see, that is the precise lyric that made that a wedding song.

 

Becky: Yeah. OR “I'm gonna love you till/My lungs give out.” Till my lungs give out?

 

Matt: But then he just literally contradicts what he’s just saying. He’s like, “I’m going to…” What?

 

Becky: Be with you even when we’re ghosts. But now it’s just till my lungs give out. He backed it up a bit. He was like, “Ooh…”

 

Matt: There was a rug that he pulled out from underneath her, which is that he doesn’t believe in ghosts.

 

Becky: OR he’s thinking he’s got a better shot in the afterlife of hooking up with, like, Anna Nicole Smith or something.

 

Matt: I’m guessing. But no one says what Anna Nicole Smith looks like after she died. What form of Anna Nicole?

Becky: He’s thinking ahead. FAR ahead since he cut it back down to just till my lungs give out. “I promise till death we part like in our vows”?

 

Matt: Yikes. That’s just poor sentence construction.

 

Becky: Well, again, this song is about alcoholism and it’s a top 10 wedding song.

 

Matt: That’s a winner.

 

Becky: I think it’s a top 10 wedding song mainly because he’s British and the Brits do love their booze. *Laughs* So I’m sure it hits home with a lot of Brits.

 

Matt: I’m going to give you the win on this one. It was never a competition. I’m giving you the win. That is a clusterfuck of a song.

 

Becky: That TOP hit...I don’t even know what it topped at, but it’s up there. Not only that...WEDDING SONG.

 

Matt: First of all, he didn’t just have a thing for ladies who were messes, he then also proceeds to move forward with it to be like, “You know what I really love about you? How you hide your debilitating substance use from your family. That’s a major turn-on for me.”

 

Becky: See? He gave us a little hint in the beginning, and we’re all like, “This guy’s just an idiot. They’re just young.” And then it’s, “Oh shit. They’re alcoholics.”

 

Matt: She’s got a problem! And then it should have just been, “I’ll love you until we’re ghosts, which will be soon because your liver won’t last much longer.”

 

Becky: Because cirrhosis is bad. I say this is right up there. I say this is a 4.5 on the yikes scale for me.

 

Matt: I was precisely thinking somewhere between 4 to 4.5, but I will give it credit. There’s no way it’s going to be a 5, only because there was an emotional journey there.

 

Becky: There was. He took you on a little bit of a ride, albeit a crazy rollercoaster of alcoholism clusterfucks.

 

Matt: I don’t think I would have ever..No, no no. AMENDMENT: I would have never guessed there was an actual major pop song that had the word alcoholism in it.

 

Becky: Now I feel like I’ve got to look it up, but he was up there. I can’t remember where it was, but it played a lot, and I was like, did anyone actually listen to these lyrics before it went anywhere outside of the recording studio?

 

Matt: I think they saw it and thought to themselves, “Oh my God -- the UK -- this is going to be relatable.”

 

Becky: *Laughs* These people drink like fish and they are going to love this song. Alright, let’s see if I can find it...where did this damn song hit. I can’t believe this song about alcoholism made the charts. Let’s see, Brit Awards...Video of the Year and Single of the Year in 2017. Also, Oh thank God, it wasn’t for Teen Choice Awards. Thank goodness!  He also won American New Artist of the Year that year!

 

Matt: No. This is #MeToo moment. First of all it was a #MeToo moment and then, following that, was alcoholism and neglect?

 

Becky: Peaked at number 11 on the Billboard Hot 100. In May 2018, it was reported that The Script, also another classic band, had launched legal proceedings against him due to alleged copyright infringement in regards to this song.

 

Matt & Becky: OHH!

 

Becky: It just got ugly.

 

Matt: Although now I’m intrigued at the title because...does the title, “Say You Won’t Let Go” refer to…

 

Becky: The booze?

 

Matt: ...a Jameson bottle? Or James Arthur?

 

Becky: I’d go with the bottle of booze. *Laughs*

 

Matt: I think she’s certainly loving that!

 

Becky: THAT is good when you’re a ghost.

 

Matt: You know what pairs best with cirrhosis? Jameson. Informal plug.

 

Becky: Jameson if you would like to sponsor us…

 

Matt: Please let us know!

 

Becky: Please!

 

Matt: Please get us out of this studio.

 

Becky: This studio is hot and there’s guns a-blazin’ probably somewhere in Seattle right now. Okay everybody, thanks so much for listening. Please join us next time when we take a peak at the riveting lyrics of songs from the ‘90s. That’s right. I’m Becky.

 

Matt: I’m Matt.

 

Becky: And this was…

 

Becky & Matt: WHAT THE LYRIC?!?