What You Didn't Expect in Fertility, Pregnancy & Birth: Real Stories & Expert Insights

Today we hear part two of my conversation with Diana about her experiences with pregnancy and delivery. Last week, our conversation ended with Diana 41 weeks pregnant, partially dilated, stomping around in the hall of the hospital trying to get her baby to move into a better position for birth. When all of a sudden she loses her sight. We'll pick up the conversation where we left off in this part of the episode I also include the insights of a doctor training in ophthalmology and neuro ophthalmology.

This is a weekly show that highlights real pregnancy, birth & postpartum stories.

Today's guest grew up with a mother who is something of an earth goddess, meaning that she was involved in a movement toward empowered birthing long before it's a main cultural current. So the seeds of an idea of what a birth should look like were planted early in my guests life. In the course of her first delivery, preeclampsia fell on her out of a clear blue pregnancy–one that was normal and healthy up to that point. This condition can come with insults to any number of organs, and in her case it dramatically affected her vision. She was struck by blindness.  Her story of coming to terms with the differences between her image of this process and the actual process is inspiring and so too was the way she and her husband managed the large number of obstacles they met along the way to creating their family. What follows is part one of her story. In part two, which will be released next Friday, the ninth we're joined by a neuro ophthalmologist who explains what's going on physically when preeclampsia includes blindness.

This is a weekly show that highlights real pregnancy, birth & postpartum stories.

 Today’s show shares the conclusion of Nina's experience as a pregnant 40 year old, trained in psychiatric nursing. She experiences many challenges, some unexpected, and other's that are less surprising. She talks about navigating an unwanted C section and peripartum and postpartum depression.  

This is a weekly show that highlights real pregnancy, birth & postpartum stories.

Today’s show features a guest that can give us some perspective on the current climate around two important topics: abortion and postpartum depression. She’s a psychiatric nurse practitioner, who experienced an abortion in the 1970s and peripartum and postpartum depression in the 1990s. She’s written about her experience. In a piece, titled “No Stranger”. Here are some excerpts from her writing. First, she writes:

“How do you know?” the patient might ask. I lean forward a bit in my

office chair, a magic mix of science and empathy, or so I would like to

think. The woman sitting across from me may be dabbing at her eyes

with her fingers. If her nails are chewed to bloody shreds, I will fold my

own more tightly in my lap.

“I’ve been a nurse practitioner for a long time,” I will say. “More

women than you think go through this. It’s hormonal…”

And a little later in the piece she writes:

Early on I figured that postpartum depression was

a risk for me, but expected I could balance my emotional happiness and

stability against my physiological tendency towards clinical depression,

if I was ever so lucky as to get pregnant. And besides, I was a

professional. With training and resources.

So here’s the thing with training and resources: Depression robs

you of the clarity to use any of those skills or supports.

Let's get to her story
For extended show notes, see: https://warstoriesfromthewomb.com/

This is a weekly show that highlights real pregnancy, birth & postpartum stories.

Today's episode features the story of an extremely challenging pregnancy that ended in a late term abortion, which was difficult for many reasons, and made more so by the politics and legal apparatus around abortion. My guest was well into a pregnancy that felt off to her in ways she could describe, but which didn't trigger any particular medical action, because first, the diagnosis when it came was for a very rare condition, and secondly, she made it past the 20 week screen with no visible issues on ultrasound. That my guests first pregnancy was visited by a significant hemorrhage and was By comparison, the easier pregnancy gives you some sense. One thing she says that I think bears repeating upfront is that extreme circumstances sometimes lead to extreme actions. 

This is a weekly show that highlights real pregnancy, birth & postpartum stories.

Today's guest had a pregnancy marked by extremely easy things and significantly hard things. Getting pregnant was consistent with the kind of fertility you see in a romantic comedy instantaneous, but the first trimester morning sickness was more like a sci fi thriller, totally extreme and requiring all kinds of medical help. And after a pretty challenging pregnancy, she ran into postpartum depression after the birth but her’s is a story of overcoming. She found help and recovered and she's deeply immersed in the joy only a five year old child can bring. I also include the insights of Dr. Samantha Meltzer Brody, a psychiatrist who’s the director of the UNC Center for Women’s mood disorder, and the author of many, many scientific papers on the topic of perinatal, and postpartum depression

for extended show notes, see: https://warstoriesfromthewomb.com/

This is a weekly show that highlights real pregnancy, birth & postpartum stories.

Today's episode features a moving story from a woman who recalls her first pregnancy in the late 1960s. The pregnancy was unintended. She was 18. Her parents, her social setting, and the cultural expectations of the time suggested that she had two options: either to marry her then boyfriend and start a family or have the baby in secret and surrender the newborn to the social workers who vaguely tended to her in the Home for Unwed mothers where she spent the end of her pregnancy and birth. Raised in the catholic faith to strict parents, abortion was not something she'd think to pursue, and it wasn't legal or easily accessed, especially for a women who wasn't married.  My guest reflects on how dramatically cultural views of sex and marriage have changed since she was first pregnant, and how her feelings about these topics have changed as well.

for extended show notes, see: http://warstoriesfromthewomb.com/

This is a weekly show that highlights real pregnancy, birth & postpartum stories.

In general all the stories women shared on the show reflect on Roe in part because they show how challenging pregnancy can be both physically and mentally even when pregnancy is highly sought after. That's one of the major take homes from this podcast real women sharing their actual experiences and hopefully contributing to a more realistic narrative around pregnancy and birth. And today's story is very much in this vein. My guest today walked into pregnancy unsure about whether she wanted to have a child. Ultimately she and her partner decided they did. She ran into gestational diabetes which effected how she felt about the pregnancy and her ability to control her blood sugar, and had a significant impact on the delivery, which happened in late fall of 2019, so she also had to contend with a six month old when the first lockdown happened. She and her partner managed it all and now are enjoying their 2 and a half year old.

This is a weekly show that highlights real pregnancy, birth & postpartum stories.

Today's episode features a difficult but important story. It’s the kind of story we avoid in part because it involves difficult emotional topics—sexual assault and unintended teenage pregnancy—topics that society does not handle gracefully. My guest today was sexually assaulted by her partner as a teenager, and carried this unintended pregnancy to term, at which point she put the baby up for adoption.  More than two decades have passed since these events transpired, but we talk about how every element of this challenging situation has impacted my guest's life, and continues to affect her deeply, and likely always will. Now that Roe v Wade is under such direct threat, and there are calls for women to "just carry out the pregnancy and put the baby up for adoption", what all this does to the woman forced to undergo this experience is more often buried than shared. I am grateful to my guest today for sharing her story.

This is a weekly show that highlights real pregnancy, birth & postpartum stories.

These days the word mother can mean a lot of different things. As today's guest shares, she sought out the birth of her first child, but the second pregnancy was unintended. Her preference for family size clashed with her partners, Although she may have been open to terminating the pregnancy, her partner was not; she was living in a state whose majority is not particularly supportive of a woman's right to choose, and she was brought up in a religion in which abortion is not considered a reasonable choice. and so began a very emotionally taxing pregnancy and birth. She shares how she managed these challenging circumstances which I think is an important story to share, especially right now when such black and white ideas about pregnancy and birth are in abundant circulation.

This is a weekly show that highlights real pregnancy, birth & postpartum stories.