Whataboutism is the practice – or even a single act – of responding to a criticism or accusation by claiming that a supposed offense committed by someone else is just as bad or worse. In the interest of promoting rational conversation…

 Let’s assume for a moment, that you hear something that prompts you to want to respond with whataboutism.  Try to resist that temptation. 

  Instead of “what about …?” try something less likely to ignite anger. Even “what do you think about …?”   “How might they be similar?” 

On the flip side, what works best if the “what about” is thrown at you? You could say “well, let’s talk about that.”  “Tell me more about what you are thinking.”  Or some other words that can lead to a continuing dialogue.

And, of course, tone matters, too.

Do you have comments or suggestions about a topic or guest? An idea or question about conflict management or conflict resolution? Let me know at [email protected]! And you can learn more about me and my work as a mediator and a Certified CINERGY® Conflict Coach at www.dovetailresolutions.com and https://www.linkedin.com/in/janebeddall/.

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