April 16, 2023

What's in a good attitude?

8 minutes

A mindset that is determined to have an impact on the good of one's self and others. It is not the size of the impact that matters, it’s the effect it has so that the ripples of our actions are felt positively through time. I believe that if we remain humble and realise how small we are in the universe and on this planet and in time, rather than being a demotivator I think it’s a great motivator. What if we live more carefully in how we affect the small reach that we have to make a positive impact on the circle close to us and build a life with people who know from our attitude and actions that we have a strong view on what really matters to us. I refer to “us” because everyone values things differently and imposing our values on others is a poor attitude in itself. I think one of the dangers of the internet where too many people fed on algorithms want the world to live and think like they do, with everything outside of their belief system seen as wrong.

If our passion or creativity reaches a little further out or a long way out that’s wonderful but not essential. Einstein and Stalin both achieved and are remembered for vastly different reasons. I can only but wander what Stalin thought of himself as a person and whether he reflected on a life well lived having made a positive contribution? The older I get the more I realise how few people we can know very well and how careful I must be to not spread myself too thin, which always impacts those closest.

So, onto a few ideas of what contributes to a good attitude:

Show up each day the same. Moods are an awful manipulation of others.

Self-confidence needs to come from within and if our intentions are good most of the time then the feedback we get will be good most of the time and this is a positive circle. What I have learnt is that every person on the planet struggles in some area of their life to make sense of what it’s all about and no person has it all together all of the time. I venture to say even half the time.

We can control is our attitude to ourselves and to others and fundamentally if we are less judgemental and have greater empathy relationships get better.

Know yourself and your strengths and weaknesses. What is amazingly powerful is understanding how a weakness can be a strength, and vice versa. Remember, it is the effectiveness of the whole package that counts.

There is one strength that is non-negotiable and universal. We must be brave - we must have the courage to take the risks necessary to know ourselves in order to become a better people.

Do the work, often for longer than we think, and good things will happen, we just never know when. Pass the tests that life repeatedly throws at us until we learn the lesson.

Believe that we can improve anything we focus on. Understand that we cannot have self-assurance until we have achieved something. Initially, belief is more important than confidence. Trust that the confidence will come as you progress. This mindset alone will give you conviction.

Take action. Find a mentor or coach who can help us apply what we learn. Pay attention to the details of application. It is not the ‘what’ but rather the ‘how’ that is vital.

There are two attitudes. The attitude of perseverance to achieve. A second attitude is how do we behave once we get whatever relative success we wanted? I favour someone who lives in a way that shows appreciation by facilitating others to succeed.

As always I’m keen to stress that these are nuggets that help me. My personal favourite attitude is the belief that no one knows better for themselves than each person, which is why good coaching helps people work things out for themselves. If you are interested in working with me email me with the word INTERESTED

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By David Sammel