Most of us were taught to believe love is something that happens to us—intense, emotional, and often unpredictable. But what if real love isn’t a feeling at all… what if it’s a conscious, daily choice?

In this powerful episode of Strong Her Sessions, Vanessa and Kate dismantle the myths surrounding love and expose how love is often distorted into control, manipulation, or emotional leverage—especially in romantic and family relationships. Together, they explore how to tell the difference between love that supports your growth and love that quietly erodes your sense of self.

Vanessa shares her journey of redefining love across friendships, family, and romantic relationships—learning what love truly looks, sounds, and feels like when it’s rooted in safety and respect. Kate opens up about how betrayal and painful endings sharpened her ability to recognize genuine connection versus control disguised as care.

This episode invites you to rethink everything you’ve been taught about love—and to ask the more empowering question:
Is the love in my life helping me become more myself… or less?

Whether you’re healing from a toxic relationship, navigating dating, or reassessing a long-term partnership, this conversation will challenge you to choose love consciously—without abandoning yourself.

In This Episode, We Explore:

• Why love is not a fleeting emotion, but an active commitment

• How love is weaponized through guilt, silence, and emotional control

• The difference between healthy connection and codependency

• Why intensity is often mistaken for intimacy

• What real love feels like in your body and nervous system

• How to set boundaries that protect your growth

• Why safety, trust, and consistency matter more than passion alone

  
  

  Key Takeaways

• Love is a choice, not a reward.
  Real love is consistent and present—it doesn’t disappear when it’s inconvenient.

• Love should expand you, not shrink you.
  If you have to silence yourself to keep someone, it isn’t love—it’s control.

• Intensity isn’t intimacy.
  Chaos doesn’t equal chemistry. Safety creates connection.

• Manipulation often masquerades as care.
  Guilt, emotional withdrawal, and conditional affection are red flags.

• Self-awareness is the turning point.
  Understanding how love has shown up before helps you choose differently now.

  
  

  Who This Episode Is For

• Anyone healing from toxic or manipulative relationships

• Women questioning whether the love in their life is truly supportive

• Those unlearning people-pleasing or codependency

• Listeners seeking healthier boundaries and deeper self-trust

• Anyone ready to redefine love on their own terms

Love isn’t meant to trap you.
It’s meant to free you.

The journey to real love starts from within—and we’re here to guide you there.

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