The Relationship Maze

When Attachment Styles Collide


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What might a relationship with two partners who are avoidant-dismissive look like? Or two people who are anxious-preoccupied?  In today's episode we look at the combinations of (insecure) attachment styles in relationships.

We discuss the dynamics of relationships where one partner is secure and the other isn't and look in more detail at the impact of having the same or opposite insecure attachment than your partner. While there is no clear prediction whether a relationship with two insecurely attached partner will last or not, there is more likelihood that some insecure combination of attachment are going to run into trouble.

In couples therapy the most common presentation is one where one partner is avoidant-dismissive and the other is anxious-preoccupied. Both partners have similar wounding but opposite defenses.

Related Relationship Maze podcast episodes:
7 Signs You Might Have an Anxious-Preoccupied Attachment Style
7 Signs You Might Have an Avoidant Attachment Style

The Relationship Maze courses:
What is your argument style? Find out in our short quiz. You can find a link on our website: https://therelationshipmaze.com.

Struggling with a lot of conflict and arguments in your relationship? Learn about communicating effectively and addressing common relationship problems in our Stop Arguing, Start Loving mini course:  https://therelationshipmaze.com/relationshipconflictvsl2.

Learn everything you always wanted to know about building and maintaining  loving relationships in our comprehensive course The Relationship Maze, starting with understanding yourself in relationships to understanding your partner and understanding what makes for a successful relationship. We look at common causes of relationship problems and offer solutions. Learn how to address relationship problems and questions without breaking up.

Contact us for information about individual counselling/psychotherapy, couples therapy, clinical supervision or CPD training.
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Struggling with a lot of conflict and arguments in your relationship? Learn about communicating effectively and addressing common relationship problems in our Stop Arguing, Start Loving mini course.

Learn everything you always wanted to know about building and maintaining loving relationships in our comprehensive course The Relationship Maze, starting with understanding yourself in relationships to understanding your partner and understanding what makes for a successful relationship. We look at common causes of relationship problems and offer solutions. Learn how to address relationship problems and questions without breaking up.

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