Childhood Classroom Beliefs

Let’s talk about….

* how shame creeps up in seemingly harmless experiences

* how it shaped my school experiences, attitudes and beliefs about myself

* Also, how casually I absorbed negative beliefs about the effects of crying

* and most importantly, how I let go of the belief in present time and detached it from my identity.✨

The Many Layers of Shame

There’s so many situations where shame can be created and it will be unique to you, your feelings, your experiences.

What damages one may not damage another: we all have different needs and desires and issues to repair, so it’s important to think of your own personal experiences where words or actions had really hurt or upset you.

“Rewiring” aka Creating Positive Beliefs about Ourselves

Rewiring the brain, Healing ourselves, is faster and easier than it sounds.

It’s looking at how badly experiences have truly damaged us so we can move on and take the good from the situation.

It sounds a bit strange: the pain fades away if you look and admit how bad it was? Absolutely.

(This is a common CBT Therapy concept: Dr. David Burns (I love the book When Panic Attacks) is my favorite for this work: especially anxiety, depression, fears… he has a podcast and free tools here) (I love the book When Panic Attacks; his books are thick but extremely thorough)

Treating Sickness so it Doesn’t Get Worse

The same idea that applies when you’re sick, you probably treat yourself for not feeling well, applies here! ❤️‍🩹

Emotional and psychological pain is no different. (this concept applies to many situations: dont avoid things you want and need to change in order to make yourself happy🎈)

When old negative beliefs come to mind and we start to shame, we can pause on our thoughts, because we are:

* breathing deeply & moving slow🧘

* aware of our thoughts🧠

* asking if these thoughts are true or helpful or generous

* (if the answer is no, it’s time to toss it 🗑️)

The negativity fog can start to lift of “Im not treating myself nicely, and it’s time to be kind to myself.” Sometimes that means I need to cry and really grieve this belief of myself that I have been carrying around which I am letting go of.

All this to say, you can create positive beliefs any time shame or negative thoughts come up for you.🤍

Thanks for reading The Accountabilityy Hour! Share & Subscribe to support my work.

The Best Way to Heal is the Way you Feel is Best

Give yourself grace. 🕊️

This is a basic personal reflection, and I want to address not all things can be healed in the same ways or needs more serious work, and healing is normally emotionally exhausting.

If you don’t feel you can apply these steps and feel like you’re suffering with negative and persistent thoughts, it’s important to reach out to loved ones, doctors, care team, healers and therapy you trust so you are receiving all the care and support you require and would like to have, because you are the most important.

Healing is a complex process and however feels best to you is the best way to go about it, and issues often need multiple tools to heal.🩵

Give yourself Grace, this winter, and everyday. 🤍

Much Love,

Ashley

Get full access to Ashley Reilly's: The Accountabilityy Hour at daydreamslowlyy.substack.com/subscribe