The Accountabilityy Hour with Ashley Reilly

The World WE Live in.

I am surprised about Dolly Parton’s recent passing this week. Mostly because I personally think it’s unfortunate the public couldn’t have the benefit of mourning Dolly while she was here (like how we got a Farewell Tour with Ozzy Osbourne).

Especially because she had had a long, unique career in the spotlight coming from originally, humble beginnings “A Coat of Many Colors”.

I can understand Dolly Parton probably was not interested in being bothered or marketed off of while she was dying, but I feel you can set that boundary with not doing tours or events while being transparent with where you are actually at instead of lying about future events you are never going to be able to attend. However, celebrities and their teams make their own personal private choices.🤷🏼‍♀️

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To Be or To Not Be Vulnerable…

Though we all have the right to share or hide our vulnerabilities, I personally value transparency so individuals can properly relate to you and where you’re at.

And most importantly, so we can go through this crazy human experience and learn and lean on each other together.

If you’ve seen any interviews of Hayden Panettiere in recent years, she’s definitely struggling and it’s an extremely unfortunate and public example of how struggling alone can be detrimental. (my memory of course also goes to Amy Winehouse OD, and how her team encouraged her to keep performing but didn’t seem to get her any help.)

Being human is so hard.

We are all struggling and we should not have to do it alone. No one can manage or take our pain away from us, but it makes a world of a difference to connect and speak with people who understand where you’re at and empathize with you.

Famous people and celebrities are in the same boat as us regular folks: it’s just a larger often shinier faster yacht.

And maybe while our small boat takes 40 long years to sink or to look crappy, celebrity boats fall apart MUCH FASTER.

I think people watching and connecting with influencers or other’s on the globe a because we see them go through struggles and WE are also going through struggles! They are at a grander scale, however, they are being vulnerable (well, theyre filming lol) with their life and I think we ALL need more of that.

🤔We need more filming and celebrities??

Well we certainly need more vulnerability. Celebrities are an example of how we see so much of their lives and we appreciate it because IT’S REAL.

And I think it is pointing at a issue where maybe we are not so real in our lives typically, or we walk around with these masks and these shields we don’t let down til we are in our own home.

We Need Less Masks. 🎭

We need less fear. It’s easy to say, but not always so simple to do. If we feel there are repercussions for being ourself, why would we be ourself??

So you have to ask yourself, what kind of repercussions would I face for being who I want to be and why? what would happen if I followed my passions? is failure an absolute guarantee (which it never is) or something I strongly believe will happen?

I often think of David Burns book for anxiety and fear (When Panic Attacks) and so much of anxiety is putting off something we can do and worries are taking over our behavior.

But once we go up the a ladder, once we face our fears, we learn in our nervous system with enough time doing the activity that it’s not so scary or detrimental because we ARE STILL HERE, we are JUST FINE during and after.

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So.

What would you do, who would you be, how would you dress if you were honoring your inner child?

You won’t fail you because look how far you have gotten yourself!!

YOU can trust that your inner child. YOUR inner desires and dreams are meant for you.

They’re just waiting for you to participate and to notice your passions and current desires.

Thank you for being here!

Ashley Reilly

YOU make the Rules.

The only things impossible are the things you wont try or won’t allow yourself to have.

Rules are in place to keep people safe, but are the rules keeping you in a self-made box?

If you don’t like the position of the things in your life, the great news is YOU have ALL the power to change them.

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The Only Thing Impossible is What You Don’t Try.

Do you ever feel like a life you want to live is VERY FAR from the life you CURRENTLY have??

Do you ever feel like you leave things unsaid or you never speak your mind because it would make things messy?

DO you ever feel like everything you do is for… everybody else EXCEPT yourself??

You may want to consider taking a break of carrying the rules and limitations this world, society, and other people put on you, and screw it.

Do things that make YOU happy, first and foremost.

It’s YOUR LIFE: live it how YOU want. ❤️

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Listen and Ask Questions.

When I don’t understand something, I try to slow down my listening and my reacting. If I am more present, I am more likely to listen clearly and people don’t always need our reactions, just our presence and active listening.🩵

AND the SAME is great when you don’t know how you feel, or don’t understand where someone else is at.

Slowing down, listening to their words and the emotions in their voice or opinion, and asking questions is a great start.

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Thank you for being here!

Ashley Reilly

Master Manifestation.

Life is what you make it. Whatever you want, you create it IF YOU allow yourself to. Sometimes we (me, I) sit around and we wait for signs, for the right rules or for the right advice on the situation we are going through, but what if you have your own idea of what is right for you and it doesn’t fit the mold for everybody else?

Would it sound selfish if you made decisions on a whim based on what feels right? or does that sound like a typical, chill Wednesday evening?

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions...

should not have the weight of the guillitoine. Decisions, of course, can hold a ton of consequences and side-effects to our lives.

But not taking the time during life to get to know ourselves… may be an even larger karmic mistake as a whole.

Personally, I feel the people I look up to the most are not perfect- they’re themselves. They’re messy, they’re authentic, they often aren’t apologizing for their choices... They’re Cher. another fellow Taurus lol

Seriously Though.

Whenever we take time with ourselves and listen to our little intuition whispering, decisions becomes inspired actions that are authentic and more intertwined with our personality because it fits our desires, our values, and brings passion and clarity to our lives. Our decisions mirror back to us who we are.

Moving Forward.

Soo many times when we put off making decisions, the decision is made for us inevitably.

If we have excuses on why we can’t begin a goal, why we can’t be happy in a relationship, or why things cannot work out: we procrastinate decisions into oblivion… ➡️ until the decision is made for us because we never started or we couldn’t persevere beyond our fears.

And that is the book of our life.

Isn’t it better to write life on your own terms, your own choices, and shaping your own path that works for your enjoyment and your passions?

Be Uncomfortable.

Try atleast 1 new thing a week that’s out of your comfort… whether that is talking to the grocery store clerk and having a real conversation and actually caring about what they say, or if that’s actually trying to get to know your boss on a personal level, or writing in your journal about a situation that makes you uncomfortable or doesn’t sit right with you, and what you ideally would like to picture or have.

And of course, treat yourself after- make a cup of tea before bedtime, talk on the phone with you favorite cousin who lifts you up, or take your daughter to her favorite park to read a book together.

What’s something you’re struggling to do or consistently have a hard time doing? What would make it more bearable or what could you focus on to change the perception while you do something uncomfortable?

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Thank you for being here, listening and sharing your thoughts! 🩵

Ashley Reilly

Feeling Inspired? Or Feeling Forced?

It’s pretty interesting to me how the self-help industry is growing, and growing, and growing…

But….

* do you think relationships or behavioral issues are improving for people?

* Books line the shelves with every way to think of a solution to a possible problem but is it actually making us happier or giving us better relationships?

* Why is it that a new, tremendous, one-trick idea you need to IMMEDIATELY implement on how to make more time or have better energy pops up nearly every day on a new podcast? (*cough-cough-Mel Robbins- cough*)

All I’m Saying Is….

Books and podcasts are great things, great tools.

Information is an incredible resource to steer our own personal compass.

Though podcasts, youtube videos, and social media are not ways to pressure yourself on how living your life is supposed to look.

It’s suppose to inspire you of what you can do with the things accessible to you and what would best suite yourself in your current situations. (aka: take what applies, and toss the rest!)

And if that is a nap with your cat in the afternoon or playing a game with your pet turtle, that is being present in the moment.

The Small Moments Make Up the Special Memories.

Doing what presents itself and feels right for the moment is the extraordinary parts in life, not always accomplishments themselves or fancy work titles that tell us who we are and how we are useful to others.

(life goes by quickly, and although career and money is vital to live, I am almost positive no one passes on from their death bed saying “I wish I had been more quiet with my opinions, more meek in my desires, and more limited with my access to happiness and the ability to share it with others”. but what do youu think?)

Thank you for reading, I appreciate you sharing this space with me!🩵

Ashley Reilly

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Dreams are MORE than Dreams.

Do you ever have life-like conversations in your dreams or dreams that feel real?

Do you have dreams you do not remember but remember later on your day or during activities in your week? Do you even remember your dreams at all or do you know if you dream?

So many people do not remember their dreams, or even remember if they have dreams, and typically feel dreaming is basically meaningless. What could scenarios playing out while we are sleeping possibly mean to our lives?

Dream, Dream, Dream….

I’ve been having transformational dreams for as long as I can remember. When I was a kid I would dream of Jesus making pancakes and showing me how to create internal peace even if your external world is a literal lost desert. I wasn’t scared of an afterlife, I was inspired by it.

I don’t dream of Jesus so often now, but I have had a couple handful of dreams, typically transformational conversations, that I dreamed of before they happened. Sometimes it’s with individuals who are acquaintances or sometimes someone more connected to me.

Dreaming Years in Advance.

Now Dreaming of something peaceful like flipping pancakes in a lowly desert is not exactly the same as dreaming of conversations or knowledge you gain later on in the future.

When I first started becoming more aware, my dreams would come as instant information, like seeing someone in a dream and knowing they had passed (then learning they had actually passed away before my dream) or gaining knowledge about friendships appearing in my dreams that werent working for me anymore.

THEN, it transformed into dreams that were longer, more conversational, and then the conversations would happen. YEARS later after the dreams.

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Let me make myself clear.

I did not believe these dreams would happen, I just thought they were dreams! Though they felt pretty emotionally charged from the people in them, or very real kinda like they already happened.

And this most recent event in May this year: this event was not my idea, I just wanted to go to the concert once I heard about it! And then, the next day after the concert, we go to a mall I’ve already been to in my dream.

I don’t understand what dreams are exactly, but I know they can be extremely informational about the trajectory we are going towards if we are willing to take a good look. Of course I do not believe all dreams will come true, but I do feel journaling on your dreams helps decipher what your subconscious is picking up on before you ever consciously realize anything.

Do you ever have premonitions about situations in your life or deja-vu? Or do you ever dream of things that end up happening or do you hardly remember dreaming at all?

Thank you so much for being here in this space with me and sharing your thoughts!

Ashley Reilly

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Making Adjustments as We Go.

The story I have heard of the Titanic, is the ship was receiving tons of messages and warnings about the iceberg that scraped the ship and they ignored it because they were preoccupied partying and did not feel it was a serious issue for a massive new ship.

Of course we all know the aftermath was a much different reality than what the captains were expecting. This is an extreme magnitude where errors made some massive catastrophe, however it often happens in life when we go through something awful and there were signs when we reflect back that maybe things weren’t as smooth sailing as we had first believed.

Energy For Others is Energy for Ourselves

When we feel like we have no energy, we have put ourselves unintentionally on a back-burner and we literally burn ourselves out, we fry our emotional bandwidth.

We put tasks, activities, obligations, other people’s feelings, etc. first instead of taking care of ourselves; and it will NEVER make up the difference or make you feel satisfied, about abandoning your own needs.

It keeps us in a perpetuating cycle where we feel if we keep getting take-out, we will feel taken care of, nourished and feel like we have more time to do something we enjoy, but what if you really enjoy cooking, what if the take-out is creating lack of freedom in your finances and activities, and you’re taking the ability to enjoy something fulfilling out of your day?

Forget about Upsetting People.

When we think about other people’s perspectives and controlling outcomes, we end up like the Titanic sinking. We end up in situations where we are trying not to draw concern or attention to our needs, we are trying to keep things comfortable for others or their perspectives, continue to drink our champagne and then we head right into catastrophe somehow trying to keep things quiet.

Isn’t is funny how the harder something is avoided the more outwardly it comes out in our behavior that we need to pay more attention to our feelings and what we want?

If we slow down, try not to rush, and remind ourselves this will not be the last opportunity to have fun we won’t feel pressured to finish the bottle of champagne while we are jumping off the ship: we may not even get on the ship in the first place because we needed a not-so-glamorous nap after work. The point is, more champagne is always coming, so forget honoring the champagne while the ship is sinking and focus on honoring your simple needs.

Thanks for joining me here! Feel free to comment, share your thoughts.

Ashley Reilly

Give Yourself Grace.

We are not machines, we are humans with feelings and circumstances that motivate and effect us.

Being successful, financially or otherwise, has nothing to do with being emotionally secure or having internal peace or understanding within ourselves.

Thank you for being here🤎 This post is public so feel free to share it.🌿

Emotional security comes from meeting yourself where you are at, acknowledging it, accepting it and spending the time with the energy. Throw down a blanket and a pick-nick-basket because we may be here for a while and that’s okay, that’s healthy. To sit with emotions, and not change them, not fight them and allow them to happen is absolutely normal. It’s human to have emotions and to be unhappy, miserable, upset, uncomfortable, angry, dissapointed or forlorn and not have to turn our frown upside down if we just don’t freaking want to.

Stop Doing Things You Don’t Want to Do.

Healthy relationships don’t come from us trying to make everyone else comfortable or putting others before our own needs but flow naturally when we can show up as ourself or honor what feels right to in the present time.

It’s important to ask ourselves why we are doing something and what do we want? Is it to gain a new experience or learn or does it feel like we feel we have to behave a certain way in order to be loved or we are chasing something?

This doesn’t mean don’t walk your dog this evening, or do not ever take the trash out again because you hate doing it, but it means why do you not have the capacity to do the task? Are you worried about your neighbors large Doberman that lunges at other dogs and you need more information or a strategy to walk your dog at separate time or walk in another area so you’re more comfortable?

There’s reasons why

we don’t enjoy our lives or don’t have positive connotations with doing things and it often goes back to us being our own worst critic or being too hard on ourselves or just being plain exhausted. OR we are going through our own personal version of jumping through hoops where we feel we need to live or do things in a certain way in order to succeed or be comfortable with things. While we would rather be sitting on a beach in Mexico.

If You Can’t Go on a Vacation, Create Your Vacation.

A lot of times we don’t necessarily wish to be somewhere else, but we wish to have less to do. Or maybe wish we had a slower routine, a more thoughtful meal-plan. Or more time in the sunshine.

What would you like to try if you did not have to do your work, take care of your home or you weren’t burnt out from life?

There’s a big difference between being busy, and being productive. There’s also a big difference between being content and fulfilled or being a drained overstimulated zombie about to snap at the next inconvenience. None of us are at are best 100% of the time and we are not supposed to be.

Things are supposed to be messy, confusing, strange, expansive, and most importantly helping you get to know or be better intuned or connected with yourself. Sometimes thats just going outside, spending time with friends, or drawing for the first time.

So if you cannot fly on a plane to Rome or Spain today, it doesn’t mean you cannot bring your idea of Spain to your home immediately. Bring the elements you want of your vacation to your environment, your routine. What’s something you feel you’d like more of in your life??

Thank you for being here!

Ashley Reilly

Breathe in, and Breathe Out.

Here we are.

We are in the social media age. 🤖 All together. 🕹️

🗣️ So it is most important now than ever to have open-hearted conversations and close relationships. 💛

Connecting with your Dental Hygienist, the person who cuts your hair, or the servers at your favorite breakfast or dinner spot is possibly the most important relationships to have. 🍳

When did we become obsessed with everything looking perfect and neglecting our emotions, getting to know others? Or has it always been this way? What do you think? 🤔

Life Has it’s Own Beautiful Ways of Working Out

Surrendering to faith is challenging.

To believe things are going to work out in life when you’ve tripped in the mud and practically knocked yourself out is like a sick joke and more like a good opportunity to cry than to feel inspired.

It’s annoying to hear people tell us we have control over our outcomes or what we are doing when we feel like things are so far from working out or far from us feeling comfortable.

But what if…

… instead of focusing on the things you don’t like in your life you focus on the things you love in your life?

What if instead of organizing all those photos you do not want to organize, you pass them along to family or friends who value them or just throw them out? Forget the photo albums, forget the agreements you have long surpassed the energy for. That stuff does not matter, certainly not as valuable as you enjoying your a short-lived life.

Throw the Crap out the Window.

If you don’t like what you’re doing, what if you literally just stopped doing it? 🚧 What if you started focusing on things you like to do?🦉

💚Instead of trying to fix everything or making things perfect, what if you threw all those expectations out the window and just enjoyed the day, today.🌍

💫What would happen? What would you do? Where would you go?

This is Your Life:

Today.

If you don’t like how it is going, if you don’t like the energy around now is the time you change it. Right now. No better time than the present.✨

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📣 Have any comments or topics to discuss? 🗣️

🌿Thank you for reading and being here, take care!

Ashley Reilly♥️

Welcome to my Soapbox for Heartbreak🤍

I am talking today about moving out of relationships when they’re not in alignment, how anxiety comes up when new transformations are going to happen, and how when we can honor our own feelings we can also honor someone else’s highest good even when you benefit from the connection.

I am also talking a little about my own ego’s beliefs: how I was feeling invincible in the feeling department, and had the false belief I couldn’t get deeply hurt unless I was in a relationship.

The Truth is…🩵

Relationships and heartache come with hurt no matter how old, secure, or comfortable with your needs you become. We are only human and it’s natural to care about one another, become attached to people who make us feel great and add to our lives, and to get hurt along the way.

Healing is not Linear.

Healing and doing the right thing can be confusing, foreign, and unnatural. Life is not a perfect learning environment for how to respect one another or each other’s life path’s.

Feeling Good Feels Nice🌺

Just like in most things, we want a surplus of good feelings and connection in life, in relationships. We enjoy adding cheese to our pasta, flavor and bubbles to our water, and watching exciting, captivating entertainment. That is natural, that is human, that isn’t something we have to learn to be creative, to want to connect and be a part and do interesting things.

It is certainly a learning-opportunity, a skill, to be able to think of other’s interest’s, their life’s journey (not the journey we want them on, but the journey they are ACTUALLY on), and to put their interest’s before our own and support them in that journey whether or not we get to be by their side during the process.

Thank you for reading!

Ashley Reilly

Hello, hello, hello.

I am so glad you’re here on this planet with me at this period of time- what a blessing this is in and of itself. 🌻

I have been inspired by and listening to the audiobook Detached recommended by a beautiful wise soul, and I highly recommend it for a fresh perspective on unhealthy dynamics we pick up along the way of life and adapt to society for our survival on this Earth. 🌿

I have also been reading Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis— in my view, it’s a relaxed exploration on religious denominations similarities and the egotistical identity we often have of “God”, the universe, life and why so many people hate religion or feel they’re agnostic…🦋

And since I enjoy fiction and have never read the Chronicle’s of Narnia, I ordered an old set of the books since I liked them in certain color palette and older books have more character, so I’m very excited for them to get here. 🪄(And obviously with my whole decluttering frenzy that means there are books I have that will go on to a new adventure, too…🌝 Is there anything you specifically struggle to get rid of??)

I have never read Chronicles of Narnia but I loved the movies growing up so I can only imagine the books are better. I have never read Harry Potter so that is probably going to be the next set, eventually.📚 Summertime is one of my favorite times to read- especially fiction. Do you have a favorite season or time to read?🙃

💫Of course I typically have to put a cautionary note as always since we often make things literal- soo, talk to individuals you trust and confide in and feel in alignment with for your best life decisions with where you’re currently at. When you feel you need support and that you are drowning in your issues, reach out to trained professionals or support systems and see how you feel as you are connecting with them and what kind of guidance and new solutions individuals can offer you. Great support is out there, but you have to be willing to search and not settle for less when you find something isn’t working for you and you know it in your gut- when you’ve dug yourself into a hole, stop digging.🌳

Thank you for reading this article, supporting my Substack, and opening your perspectives and mind to this podcast. But most of all, thank you very much for growing here with me in real time and I am sending you my prayers and healing energy.🦉🩵

Ashley