This is part 1 of 2 with Sarah Siegert. Sarah Siegert is an expert friendship coach for expats, and recent speaker at the Expat Women’s Conference. I believe she is handling the challenge of this era .. loneliness.

What’s new with Sarah? (4:40). She spills the beans on an exciting new chapter of her life. Mike had an underwhelming Winter himself (5:40).

They get into the 'Ridiculous Question' of course (8:05) and what compelled her to move to London .. Was it love? Was it work? (11:40)

“I didn’t think anything of it. I just went for it.”

Sarah’s story resonates with Mike and his story as well. What made the difference for them (14:20)?

Mike finds one more plug for his book :D (13:50). 

Mike asks Sarah how her speaking engagement went at the Expat Women’s Summit (15:30).

They get into her expertise by talking about the pros and cons of big city life and building friendships (18:40). This segues nicely into a discussion about Expats hanging out only with people in their own crowd and the frustration they have, which is what Sarah is all about solving.

Stay tuned for Episode 46 .. Sarah's Bonus Round, as we get more in the weeds of the solutions to solve lonliness.

You can contact Sarah through the following links:

Mike's Book!! Click the link here!

There are reason why Mike keeps the record button pressed throughout his time with these amazing guests. There might be something that puts the cherry on the top of the ice cream sundae .. in this case .. quite a few cherries. Karina or should I say Kalimba, drops another treasure chest and talks about her real name and challenges growing up with it. There is definitely a multitude around the world that can relate!

(2:00) Karina and Mike were all but done with their talk, when she divulged a personal story of her real name and the troubles that ensued as she navigated her TCK world.

She shares  a stunning story that reveals how sad and broken our world is (5:00), and the demands people make in knowing why she has the name she has. She feels safe enough to unravel the mystery for listeners and talks about how parents should think about the impact it has on children when naming them (12:35).

Mike tells his wife’s name story (17:00), and they trade a few more name stories and talk about how we feel safe among TCK’s where we accept all our odd names without judgment (20:30).

Karina's services are available on her website here:

https://expatworldpsychologist.com/en/home/

Mike can be contacted here, and would love it if you signe up to get access to early bird rewards on his Kickstarter campaign starting in less than a month:

https://sullyworks.com/

In this episode, Karina Lagarrigue and I talk about sensory processing sensitivity and highly sensitive people. It's in her wheel house for sure and specifically the area of her recent research.

Mike and Karina jump into the deep end on sensory processing sensitivity and highly sensitive people (2:40). Mike chastises himself for assuming it is a disorder or disease. Karina provides beautiful explanation of polarity in the field that exists and talks about the healthy place in the middle—That this can look very different from person to person (8:50).

Mike tries to avoid soliciting any simplistic observations but looks for information helpful for teachers in the classroom to know if some children are highly sensitive. Karina talks about her own children as examples (12:00).

Mike and Karina discuss her personal experiences as a highly sensitive person (19:30), and how she managed it growing up. This segues into the diversity among highly sensitive people depending on many factors such as extroversion, introversion, and the pension for thrill seeking (24:00) as an HSP.

Mike talks about his own experience feeling like there was something wrong with him (27:24), and how its often a picture of society's view of the unique traits we have.

Karina talks about the dehumanizing effects of labeling someone due to our complexities (29:45).

Mike relates this to grading systems in the arts and how unimaginative it is to measure the heights students climb to overcome unique challenges for each of them (33:00). 

Watch out on social media and Karina's websit for her workshop for Highly Sensitive TCK (34:30) with Michael Pollack coming out in April.

Karina gives 3 pieces of advice (34:00) to parents. "We are not raising little clones of ourselves, we are raising human beings (39:55)."

(40:20) The ‘museums’ .. Mike inquires about Karina’s involvement in designing spaces that contain a healthy amount of stimuli for all. Karina divulges that designing a space for highly sensitive people is good for everyone (44:00).

You can connect with Karina here on her website:

https://expatworldpsychologist.com/en/home/

You can find the test for SPS (sensory processing sensitivity) here on Dr. Elaine Aron's website:

https://hsperson.com/

If you ARE a TCK and wondering if you have it Karina would greatly appreciate it if you could fill out this survey.

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeCtUL5h_11s0Tm852vxWYpWEgzLTdPtkycfuMWun8qP6Fd0A/viewform

Of course!! If you are interested in my book and want to get in on it early, PLEASE sign up on my website here:

https://sullyworks.com/

Karina Lagarrigue graces the podcast in a 3 part series. She is a sexologist and couples therapist, mainly with expats and shares with us her journey toward her doctorate, her TCK experience, and the “dance”.

Mike stumbles over another name .. :D (3:40).

Karina discusses the final road she is on with her thesis and publishing her fascinating findings in a series of articles more palatable to the audience (3:50).

Mike weighs in on the complexity of psychology and Karina responds with her experience in the field (7:30). 

The ridiculous question of course is asked. It is as uncomfortable for Karina as it is for any of us (12:10).

Mike gets into the weeds of asking about discrimination sounding like (17:25) the colonies rather than from Spain. He then starts to nerd out about what he’d like to study for his PhD (19:00).

Karina shares how she became the “Dance Therapist”   (21:00) as a sexologist and couples therapist, helping them reconnect with their bodies. Mike (28:30) suddenly wonders about the gender dynamic with leading and its connection with ‘dance’ in the bedroom. Do we do what makes everyone else comfortable or ourselves? How does that work?

Karina’s answer dives into their TCK upbringing and the dynamics around the expat parent’s lives and THEIR needs (30:30).

Karina's website can be found here:

https://expatworldpsychologist.com/en/home/

Don't forget to sign up to gain access to Mike's early bird rewards for his Kickstarter campaign for his book here:

https://sullyworks.com/

Doreen has recently retired and rewired to Mexico but hasn't stopped. She is releasing her third book soon, and it has been amazing having the host of 'Nomadic Diaries' on the other side of the microphone.

Glad to have her on the other side of the microphone.

Doreen’s quest for coffee is a priority (3:00), and this spurs a conversation about the difficulty of getting Americans to imagine the rest of the world (4:00). Then suddenly, they discover an overlap in engagement ring stories (6:30). 

The ridiculous question (8:00) gets an interesting reaction from Doreen. Mike asks Doreen for the “short” rundown and she gladly obliges to provide the two minute version of her amazing journey as an expat.

Doreen mentions marrying a TCK, which prompts Mike to ask about his background (13:00), and finds out its it goes back much further. Doreen articulates the shift recently within the TCK community (14:20) to understand the difficulties of being a TCK, and how her daughter is actively overcoming them (17:30). Mike opens up about his ‘kryptonite’    as a TCK and a significant story from his book (18:45) that exemplifies our super weaknesses along with our super power.

This provides a segue to Doreen’s upcoming book about repatriation (20:50) and the balancing act it becomes in fitting in and standing out. She talks about her own repatriation experiences (23:00), and corresponding advice. For example how do we  deal with estrangement (27:00)? 

Mike talks about the possibility of repatriating back to the US (29:00), and his associated goals (32:00). Doreen drops more precious tips for those of us considering such a transition regarding bringing kids (35:00) and visioning with them (38:45) of what our future will look like.

Doreen ends the podcast by leaving us with some final challenges for those of us in the global ‘heartedness web’ and the impact we can have to bring peace in this world (43:00).

Check Doreen's stuff out here:

Her books: Arriving Well Life in the Camel Lane

Her Podcast: https://www.nomadicdiariespodcast.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doreenexpathub/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/doreenmcumberford/

Of course if you are interested in connecting with Mike or supporting his book effort you can find it all here:

https://sullyworks.com/

In this bonus round, Jacob introduces the five milestones of identity construction theory (5:30), which include a sense of stability, belonging, and direction.

He also shares his project called 'Stuff,' which aims to collect stories about the mementos and objects that hold significance for TCKs (14:40). This triggers Mike to tears and he shares a story of loss and how Jacob and others have helped unravel the mystery of his emotional baggage around lossing a seemlingly useless set of momentos in his life (18:15). Jacob formally invites Mike and others to share these stories (20:00), and multiple submission are welcome (23:35). Of course the link is here just below:

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSegv0BtIxt9dMiJ1TnODCxHrtbRnNEJ4RVm_6xqFQbGyqV8uw/viewform

Feel free to reach out to Mike, the host of the podcast here:

https://sullyworks.com/

Dr. Jacob Daniel Huff is a TCK researcher and career international school principal who shares with us, his TCK past and research into the world of TCK identity from from the perspective of international school educators.

What's in a title? Mike and Jacob get into awkward titles we've come acrossed around the world and some of the ickiness involved in some of them (3:30).

Mike spends some time discussing Jacob as a bit of a unicorn on the podcast and why (10:00).

Jacob then answers the ridiculous question giving us a rich backstory between two different worlds, one in the farmlands of Kansas and then in the densely populated cities of Vietnam (16:30). It covers his time as an "international" teen in Hanoi and his return to Vietnam as a young adult where he meets his Korean wife. They are currently in Kansas (22:00), raising a TCK who has forgotten more languages than most people will ever learn.

They dive into his research starting with his connection with Dr. Lijadi and her work in idenity formation, and his time as FIGT's David C. Pollock Scholar (25:30). They spent the most time discussing the suprising outcome of his research in regards to inclusion. He talks about the challenges in a post colonial age in international eduation when it comes staff diversity vs. student diversity (37:00). Mike challenges this with the idea that parents are often guilty of pushing these uninclusive norms along (39:00). Dr. Huff finishes up by suggesting that this is a cop out for administrators and lists a number of important steps needed to create a more inclusive internation education system (40:00).

Stay tuned for the BONUS round!

You can connect with Dr. Daniel Huff here:

https://www.linkedin.com/in/jacob-daniel-huff/

You can connect with Mike Sullivan and/or sign up to support his upcoming book here:

https://sullyworks.com/

This episode is a 'catch his breath' episode as Mike wrangles with the stress of life stacking up on his behalf. This is a recorded episoded from November that was supposed to be a replacement episode but was never aired.

In perspective of America's upcoming election it is always healthy to see how elections are run in other countries. Jen has always provided her husband, Mike with a tangible dose of the reality she and her family have lived their whole lives.

In the episode you get to hear a bit of their personal lives, values, along with a thorough destription of what politics are like in the Philippines. That might give Americans a sense of calm knowing they are much more broken elsewhere .. or a sense of urgency to restore the stability they have enjoyed for 200 years.

Happy Valentine's Day!

If you want to connect with Mike you find him through his books website and clicking on the contact links at the top:

https://sullyworks.com/

Andrea is a certified teen girls coach who works with primarily 11 to young adult girls of expats in 3 languages.

She starts out the podcast by taking a swipe at Apple products. It's ok. They don't sponsor the podcast .. yet (3:00). Mike adds an anecdotal daughter story involving another Apple product. Maybe they should sponsor the podcast.

Andrea answers the ridiculous question (6:00), and how she grew her wings and the expat journey that ensued and continues. Mike of course figures out a way to tell a sea story from his Navy days in Mallorca, Spain (10:30), and slips in mentioning his upcoming book as well .. twice! (11:20/13:00).

If you are suddenly curious you can find out more about it here:

https://sullyworks.com/

The conversation moves into the central theme of the podcast and that is the difficult decision they had to make for their daughter, Jessica (13:15). Jessica drops a bombshell solution of going to boarding school (17:00). Andrea delves into her reservations (18:00) and the experience looking for a boarding school they were comfortable with (20:00). She shares the challenges and adjustments Jessica had to make (22:00), and how Jessica surived the adaptation rollercoaster one more time.

The discussion moves into how all these experiences raising a daughter helped Andrea perpetuate a coaching career specializing in working with teen girls (22:25). Mike and Andrea really overlap in their gifts building trust with teens and young adults (28:00), and how their cross-cultural contexts in ESL lended to this direction for both of them.

She rounds out a wonderful discussion giving advice to parents sending their kids to boarding school (34:40) and it bunny trails into both of them talking about how they apply that advice in their own lives with their kids and parents (37:00). Finally she offers the specific resources she provides her clients (40:20).

Definitely reach out to her if you are looking for support for your precious teenager. It's a challenging time in their life!!

These are the places you can find Andrea:

Website: https://www.globalgirlcoach.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/globalgirlcoach/

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/andrea-schmitt-lozano-she-her-2527451a1/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/search/top/?q=globalgirlcoach

Dr. Ruth Van Reken shares why she resonates with Mike's book title .. Building Bridges: Can We Love & Relate in a Polarized World? She also talks about SPAN (Safe Passage Across Networks).

She talks of the commonalities, not the difference that give TCK's an edge in a diverse world (1:30). She talks of the world's toxic comfort in a 'negative identity' .. defining ourselves of who we are not (5:00). Mike of course brings up his book that comes out later this year, 'Building Bridges: Can We Love & Relate in a Polarized World?' (5:50). Ruth answers with her own background growing up 'Among Worlds' that spanned cuultuures and socio economic boundaries (7:35).

Ruth talks about the power of listening and understanding, knowing that people we are talking to didn't grow up the way we did (9:10). Mike says that people CAN change and adapt to others. He points to his parents as models (10:00).

They talk about privilege and how that creates a gap between us and others, as well meaning and broad as our experiences, we often don't get treated the same. Some of us simply had more (11:30). 'We aren't as global as we think we are.' (13:40) She talks about a valuable experience of suddenly being the odd one out (15:00), as others around her were 'having a ball' (16:27) in a language she didn't know. Mike rounds this discussion out (18:00) mentioning the education he has received from the love of his life, and how important that has been to see the gap between them on socio-economic terms. Ruth adds that it is abouut 'seeing others as human (20:00) because of proximity. TCK's often bring that valuable experience tothe world.

Finally, Mike asks Ruth to talk about SPAN (22:00), an organization started by Doug Ota. SPAN helps children transition across networks because of their familys' highly transient lives. It provides support for 'leavers' and 'stayers' alike.

Dr. Ruth Van Reken loves watching people add to the work she has done (29:00), and how it is changing lives.

You can discover more from Dr. Ruth Van Reken on her website here:

https://www.crossculturalkid.org/

You can find Doug Ota's work here: https://www.spanschools.org/

Aaaand if you'd like to track down the host of this podcast, Mike Sullivan for any reason, please find him here: https://sullyworks.com/