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Somewhere along the way I learned to wait. Not for anything specific, just in general. To wait my turn, for the right moment, wait until things settled down, wait until someone somewhere decided it was finally time for me.
What I didn't realize until recently was that this wasn't patience. It was a belief I had picked up somewhere and never questioned, that my time was somehow less valuable than the time of the people around me. That everyone else's needs, schedules, dreams, and urgencies belonged at the front of the line. And that mine would come eventually. Just not right now. Never quite right now.
In this episode I'm sitting with where that belief came from, how long it has been running quietly in the background of my life, and what it has cost me to keep waiting for a permission slip that was never coming.
Because here's what I've been learning, permission is not something anyone else can give you. Not your boss, not your partner, not your family, not the version of your life that finally looks the way you thought it was supposed to look. The waiting room doesn't have a door that someone else opens from the outside. You have to open it yourself, the hardest part is realizing that you always could have.
This episode is for anyone who has been sitting in that waiting room a little too long.