Which is the best?

A tail (A sort of flappy spine arm) or a tale ("..as old as time, do-de-do-de-dee Beauty and the Beast.")

It's the question on everyone's mind as we hit the summer holidays.

Luckily, the podcast that was invented to deal with these very issues has stepped in to decide, so join Lee Kyle (If Plato was from Jarrow and markedly less bright) and Sammy Dobson (The Seghill Letitia Dean) as they do just that.

By the way, the offer to pimp Sammy out at the end definitely stands.