Whiskey Bros Around The Table

EPISODE SUMMARY: The Bros break from their usual level of unprofessionalism and hit new heights—literally sniffing ammonia straight into their brains while debating whether 3I Atlas is a rock, a mothership, or just a government psyop to cover up Charlie Kirk’s assassination. Between nasal assaults, joiner jokes, and alien whiskey diplomacy, they still find time to discuss dead bodies, dental records, and why Jesus was probably just a carpenter with better tools.

1. Savage brings out something not alcoholic for the first time ever.
2. The “world’s strongest smelling salts” nearly kill everyone.
3. Discussion: is 3I Atlas a comet, a rock, or aliens slowing down for a sip of Longbranch?
4. Multiple traumatic flashbacks to childhood whippings with fly swatters, mini-blind rods, and one guy’s dad’s

boot.

• Discussion of the body found near the high school leads to a forensic free-for-all.
  

• “If you find bones and hair, maybe check for buried treasure.”
  

Drink of the week:  Larceny Bourbon - Barrel Proof; We like our bourbon like we like our Judges!

The Whiskey Bros get historical—like, 1895 courthouse historical. We sit down with Wise County Judge, JD Clark, who somehow still has energy after wrangling the restoration of the Wise County Courthouse, now shining in all its granite-and-copper glory.

Between sips of barrel-proof Larceny, we climb the spiral stairs, ring a 130-year-old bell, and debate whether the courthouse qualifies as a castle (spoiler: the kids are right, it does). There’s laughter, a few architectural tangents, and maybe one too many jokes about bird poop and government drones—but beneath the whiskey haze is genuine civic pride.

This one matters. The courthouse isn’t just a building—it’s a living symbol of craftsmanship, community, and the kind of Texas history that deserves more than a passing glance. Our hope is that this episode gets folks out to see it, admire it, and remember that local heritage still has heartbeat—and a bell that rings on the hour.

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Guest: Reinaldo “Ray” Medina — physics teacher, theologian, and proud Texas RicanDrink of the Night: Homemade Coquito — Puerto Rican holiday coconut cream and whiskey blend (Ray’s twist on the classic rum recipe)

Ray Medina, a physics teacher originally from Cayey, Puerto Rico, joins the Whiskey Bros at the table for a night of laughter, deep thought, and Coquito. The conversation opens lightheartedly –  cigars lit, whiskey poured – but quickly moves into the meaningful terrain that defines a true Bros episode. Ray shares his journey from the mountains of Puerto Rico to the classrooms of North Texas, weaving a story of perseverance, faith, and cultural pride.

The group dives into Ray’s unique philosophy of teaching physics: that conceptual understanding must come before calculation. For him, math is not the purpose of learning but the language through which we express the truths of the physical world. His reflections on how math connects to thinking – and how students learn to “translate” ideas through it – become one of the evening’s highlights.

From there, the Bros and Ray explore Puerto Rico’s history and the island’s complicated relationship with the United States. Ray describes a nation both vibrant and restrained — culturally rich, but politically caught between dependence and autonomy. His firsthand account of bureaucracy, corruption, and the lingering colonial hangover contrasts beautifully with his love for Puerto Rican food, family, and music.

Ray’s storytelling opens windows into island life – from the sound of Caribbean rhythms and the smell of roasting pork to the political lessons written into its soil. Between sips of Coquito, the conversation ranges from theology to colonial policy, from salsa to Pentecostalism, from hurricanes to independence. By the time the glasses empty, the listener feels they’ve traveled – not just to Puerto Rico, but through the living philosophy of a man who bridges science, spirit, and soul.

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Drink of the Week:  Bad Bitch Rum from the #Unprofessionals

The OG Whiskey Bros are back—no guests this week, just the three of them with a hefty sack of gifts from listeners. They crack into bottles of Bad Bitch Rum from Key West, swap stories about Spanish Marie, and argue whether it smells more like Sharpies or super glue.

From there, the conversation spirals: Michigan church shootings, Iraqi war vets, and the “degrees of horrific” when violence escalates. They debate conspiracies around Charlie Kirk, question official narratives, and invent the codeword “cookie butter” for a certain country. Occam’s Razor makes a cameo, but so do poop knives, Trader Joe’s cookie butter, and why dippers use paper towels in their spit cups.

Somewhere between speculating on drones at rallies and laughing about knives made for slicing turds, the bros reflect on whether the world is safer now than ever, or just more exposed.

One thing’s for sure: whether it’s rum, whiskey, or conspiracy fuel, this episode is equal parts hilarious, irreverent, and unsettlingly deep.

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Drink of the evening: Cabresto Canyon Agave Spirit by Red River Distillery 

Shout out: Wendell Wiggins for the Awesome shirts! Our Unprofessionals love us!

The WhiskeyBros roll into this one already half-fixed and fully feral, welcoming the “Meggins”—Nichols and Golden (aka Ponyboy)—to the table. Between fertility jokes, shoutouts to fan-made shirts, and a crash course on how not to Google “donkey punch,” the crew stumbles into the weirdly wholesome origin of Ponyboy’s name, the messy brilliance of The Edge of Okay podcast, and why external validation is a hell of a drug.

Shots of tequila and moonshine keep the honesty flowing: we get tales of dream jobs hawking luggage on QVC, picking up women in farm trucks, testosterone pellets in asses (and why that clip alone belongs on social media), and a very graphic crash course in “gentleman vs. mama’s boy alpha male.” By the time they’re debating whether chivalry is dead, the bros are half-convinced that being a “f-ckable Ms. Frizzle” might actually be a viable brand strategy.

Somewhere between finance hacks, parenting wisdom, and suicidal Shania Twain karaoke flashbacks, the WhiskeyBros prove—once again—that nothing is off limits when whiskey, women, and wild honesty are on the table.

The Bros come in hot on this one—FireBro, SavageBro, The Chief, and Dark Doc wrestle with the biggest themes yet: good, evil, submission, and how all of it bleeds into marriage, politics, and spiritual life.

They kick off with some banter about recording mishaps and Doc’s sun-soaked arrival fresh off a cruise, then dive headfirst into the heavy stuff. The assassination of Charlie Kirk serves as a flashpoint, sparking raw reflections on political violence, cancel culture flipping back on itself, and the unsettling loss of respect for human life.

The Chief frames it as a moral and spiritual war—values being murdered alongside the man. SavageBro and FireBro point out the dangers of censorship, mob celebration of violence, and how ideologies can become “possessions” that blind people to basic humanity. Reuben brings a global perspective, noting that political violence is nothing new in places like Africa but raises the concern: is America heading down the same path?

The Bros don’t shy away from cultural flashpoints—gender ideology, family structure, free speech, and faith all get laid bare. The tone is fiery but heartfelt: an urgent plea not to grow numb, not to let evil slide in by small degrees, and not to let the war for souls be mistaken for just politics.

By the end, the conversation circles back to the home front—how husbands and wives navigate submission, strength, and spiritual leadership in marriage. It’s messy, it’s real, and it’s the Bros at their rawest: calling out darkness while wrestling with their own role in fighting for the good.

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This episode marks a sincere turn for the Whiskey Bros. We sat down once again with Lane Akin—retired Wise County Sheriff, lifelong lawman, and now author of The Point. Unlike our usual antics, this conversation leans heavy, and for good reason.

Lane joined us to reflect on a career spanning more than fifty years, the community that stood with him through both triumph and tragedy, and the personal journey of turning field notes and undercover experiences into a book that’s already become a part of local history. We also celebrated the release of the audiobook—months in the making—produced right here with the Bros.

In this episode, you’ll hear:

• How Lane’s undercover narcotics work in the 1980s laid the groundwork for The Point.
• Why he says the story is “about 75% true,” and how fiction weaves the real cases together.
• What retirement looks like for a man who’s never gone without a job.
• Why the Athena Strand case still defines his view of Wise County’s citizens.
• How reading aloud—an unexpected habit born from audiobook prep—can change the way we engage with stories.

This isn’t comedy hour. It’s a chance to honor a man, his work, and the State that shaped him. Pull up a chair, pour something strong, and sit with us as we go deeper into The Point.

#WhiskeyBros #WhiskeyBrosPodcast #TheUnprofessionals #Unprofessionals #CertifiedUnprofessional #MarkerCellars #WineNotWhiskey #ClydeMystery #SchoolRants #HomeschoolHacks #PetersonAcademy #ChatGPTChallenge #AudiobookWars #TexasPodcasts #WiseCountyTalk #Atrantil #AtrantilAdventures #FoundersBrewery #HighWest #StillAustin #WhistlePig #EvanWilliams #BuffaloTrace #MarkerCellars #ThePoint #LaneAkin #WiseCounty #AudiobookRelease #TrueCrimeStories #MethWars #WhiskeyBrosPodcast #EuphonyProductions

#AthenaStrand Athena Strand #TannerHorner Tanner Horner #murder #deathpenalty Death Penalty #justiceforathena

Whiskey of the Week: Balcones True Blue (Blue Corn Whiskey) — butterscotch, vanilla tasting notes. Firebro pours his out in disgust. Also sampled – Red River Distillery’s Vermejo Añejo agave spirit (aka “not-tequila tequila”).

The Bros kicked things off with their usual mix of raunch and banter, warning listeners (again) not to look up “donkey punch.” They joked about becoming feminists with back-to-back female guests, then welcomed Amanda Black (returning) and Crystal Cardwell (mayor of Newark).

Conversation roamed through Boyd speed traps, regional quirks (is it “flip” or “flick” someone off?), and Florida vs Texas Gulf Coast beaches — with a joke that “Trump renamed it the Gulf of America.”

Big highlight: Camp Quit Your Bitchin’ — a new glamping resort on Lake Bridgeport with stagecoach cabins, futuristic vessels, saloon, beer garden, and tetherball. Its grand opening hits Labor Day weekend. Guest Crystal’s marketing firm Pugnacious drives their campaigns, with a fiery, media-savvy approach that could boost shows like Whiskey Bros.

Side trails included aviation streaming apps, small-plane claustrophobia, and fishing nostalgia. All delivered in the Bros’ trademark style: local politics + whiskey + unapologetic humor.

#WhiskeyBros #WhiskeyBrosPodcast #TheUnprofessionals #Unprofessionals #CertifiedUnprofessional #MarkerCellars #WineNotWhiskey #ClydeMystery #AudiobookWars #TexasPodcasts #WiseCounty #WiseCountyTalk #Atrantil #AtrantilAdventures #FoundersBrewery #HighWest #StillAustin #WhistlePig #EvanWilliams #BuffaloTrace #MarkerCellars #BalconesWhiskey #RedRiverDistillery #CampQuitYourBitchin

The Bros crack open another round of pure unprofessionalism with special guest Kristal Campbell (plus her husband, posted up on the infamous casting couch for protection).

In a fun-filled turn-around, Kristal is here armed and ready to interview the Whiskey Bros for a change!

Whiskey of the Week: Larceny Barrel Proof (Batch A125, 125 proof, because numbers matter when you’re slurring them).

Highlights include:

• Celebrating our massive climb to 26 listeners (and arguing the math like drunk accountants).
• Accidentally going viral with “gay meat in the mountains” — thank you hashtag ASMR.
• Teaching the world why “donkey punch” is a term of endearment (…please don’t Google it).
• Debating whether wine belongs in a Bigf**k cup and if you can drink bourbon from a stemmed glass without losing your man card.
• Kristal proving her fan cred while simultaneously failing to open a wine bottle on mic.
• Special surprise sack reveal: Jefferson’s Ocean, aka whiskey that literally went on a cruise around the world.
• Rabbit trails into Titanic sex scenes, Ghost pottery seduction, and Kevin Costner’s Bodyguard. (Fire Bro has never seen it, WTF!)

In short: wine was spilled, whiskey was worshipped, questions were asked, and dignity was lost. Just another week with the Whiskey Bros.

🥃 #WhiskeyLore

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Drink of the Night: Marker Cellars Red – deep ruby, caramel hints (fight over the pronunciation).

The Bros are back, sipping on Marker Cellars red (out of anything but wine glasses, of course) and catching up after a summer hiatus that may or may not have involved Clyde’s mysterious vacation. Doc starts slurring his words, one glass in. We wander from wine reviews to war games, from public school rants to homeschooling hacks, and somehow end up debating AI dance teachers and audiobook robot overlords.

Highlights in This Episode:

• 🔥 Studio sabotage & suspicious mic smells – Was Clyde here? WTF is Clyde?!
• 🍷 Wine time – Tasting notes without the pretension (pinky up optional).
• 🎯 Mock school shooter drills – When Whiskey Bros become the “Terrorist Unit.”
• 🏫 School schedules from hell – 12-hour days for the kids so parents can “enjoy” Fridays off.
• 📚 Doc’s homeschool plan – Peterson Academy, ChatGPT, and no mercy.
• 🤖 Will AI steal dance class? – Why your future teacher might be a robot doll.
• 🎤 Audiobook safeguards – Human voices still holding the line (for now).

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