Who Gets the China?

When you’re estranged or out of contact with an aging parent, caregiving and grief take on a very different shape. Kirsten hosts a candid conversation with Jacqueline Hargest to share her experience with estrangement from her parents. Jacqueline openly shares how she’s navigated loss, self-compassion, and the unique challenges that come with distance—both emotional and physical. They explore topics like facing ambiguous grief, getting health updates from afar, and how friends can offer meaningful support. It’s an honest, empathetic look at a rarely discussed experience shared by many.

Follow Who Gets the China? on https://www.whogetsthechina.substack.com

Credits:

In this archival essay, Kirsten reflects on another set of mementos from childhood–her collection of glass animals. Once a precious collection shared with her mother, now another collection in storage. What’s the best course of action for an old trend, significantly reduced in monetary value, but not in personal value?

To read the original essay, check out the substack post: https://open.substack.com/pub/whogetsthechina/p/the-glass-animal-collection?r=59cxnp&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=false 

Credits:

Kirsten sits down with occupational therapist and driving rehabilitation specialist, Denise Kaplan, for an insightful conversation about driving as we age—when to start talking about giving up the keys, how to assess driving abilities, and ways to safely extend time on the road. Together, they explore the emotional and practical sides of this major life transition, offering guidance for families navigating one of the toughest conversations around aging.

Visit https://adaptivedrivinglittleton.com/ to learn more about Denise's work.

Resources mentioned in this episode:

CarFit: https://car-fit.org/

The Hartford: https://www.thehartford.com/resources/mature-market-excellence/driving-safety

Additional Resources:

AAA's Articles on Vulnerable Road Users: https://aaafoundation.org/category/vulnerable-road-users/

National Highway Traffic Safety Administration's Guide to Assessing and Counseling Older Drivers: https://www.nhtsa.gov/sites/nhtsa.gov/files/812228_cliniciansguidetoolderdrivers.pdf 

Follow Who Gets the China? on https://www.whogetsthechina.substack.com

This week, Kirsten takes a look back at our favorite moments and pieces of advice from our expert interviews.

Don't forget to check out the full versions of each interview wherever you get your podcasts for more insights and expert advice on navigating life with aging parents.

Follow Who Gets the China? on www.whogetsthechina.substack.com

If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with someone who might appreciate the conversation.

Please rate, review, and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.

Credits:

Produced by Aaron Bryce @ https://www.bluogden.com/ 

Theme music composed by Greg Fellman @ https://www.windsandproductions.com/ 

Graphic design by Jenn Beam @ http://www.jigawattsstudio.com/

Do you provide care for aging parents? Then you may have felt what I felt after a recent visit to help them out. I'm calling this phenomenon the "Caregiving Vortex."

Maybe you have also felt a little crazy for feeling burnt out, tired and overwhelmed after a phase of caregiving for your aging parents. 

Listen this week as I share and explore my experience emerging from what I think of as the "Caregiving Vortex."

This week's episode reflects on the experience of caregiving for one's aging parents but it applies to any intense caregiving. Sometimes caring for aging parents can feel like living a double life between your "caregiving" self and your "everyday" self. You may struggle to manage your own responsibilities and the responsibilities that come with caregiving. It can be a roller coaster of emotion from joy to frustration in a matter of minutes.  Listen along as I share my version of  the "caregiving vortex."

If this feels familiar, please share with someone who can relate.

Follow Who Gets the China? for more essays on www.whogetsthechina.substack.com

If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with someone who might appreciate the conversation. And don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.

Credits:

Produced by Aaron Bryce @ www.bluogden.com

Theme music composed by Greg Fellman @ www.windsandproductions.com

Graphic design by Jenn Beam @ www.jigawattsstudio.com

This week, Kirsten talks with physical therapist Kristin Zeid about how physical therapy supports older adults in staying mobile, recovering from injuries, and aging well. They explore the physical and social benefits of therapy, how families can stay attentive to their parents’ health, and the importance of working with providers who truly understand the needs of older adults.

Follow Who Gets the China? on www.whogetsthechina.substack.com

If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with someone who might appreciate the conversation. And don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.

Credits:

Produced by Aaron Bryce @ https://www.bluogden.com/

Theme music composed by Greg Fellman @ https://www.windsandproductions.com/

Graphic design by Jenn Beam @ http://www.jigawattsstudio.com/

Leaving this world—and the belongings we accumulate—is inevitable, and those we love are left to navigate the memories, the closets, and the goodbyes. In this heartfelt episode, Jennifer David and Kirsten share both tears and laughter as we reflect on a loved one’s passing and the small steps that can make the process a little easier. They explore the practical and sentimental challenges of letting go, talk about when to call in reinforcements, how to support those grieving, and the delicate balance between preparing and simply being present.

Follow Who Gets the China? on www.whogetsthechina.substack.com

If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with someone who might appreciate the conversation. And don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.

Credits:

Produced by Aaron Bryce @ www.bluogden.com

Theme music composed by Greg Fellman @ www.windsandproductions.com

Graphic design by Jenn Beam @ www.jigawattsstudio.com

This week, we are joined by Danielle Schulz, Associate Director of Lifelong Learning and Accessibility at the Denver Art Museum, to explore how art can make the aging process a more enjoyable experience. Danielle and Kirsten discuss the benefits of creative aging--a fun way to create new neural pathways, promote healthy aging, and combat social isolation. Get useful and specific tips on how you and your aging parent or loved one can be creative, whether individually or in group, at home or at a local venue. Creativity at every age enhances mental and emotional well-being, particularly for caregivers who often prioritize others' needs over their own.

Resources mentioned in this episode:

Denver Art Museum Art at Hand Program

Museum of Modern Art, NYC

Meet Me at MoMA for adults with dementia

Creative Aging at the Frye Museum in Seattle 

Metropolitan Museum of Art 360 video series

Memory Cafe Directory

Craftsy.com

Follow Who Gets the China? on www.whogetsthechina.substack.com

If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with someone who might appreciate the conversation. And don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.

Credits:

Produced by Aaron Bryce @ www.bluogden.com

Theme music composed by Greg Fellman @ www.windsandproductions.com

Graphic design by Jenn Beam @ www.jigawattsstudio.com

This mini episode features a very special guest: my mom! 

Together, we share the funny, at times frustrating, and surprisingly emotional journey of trying to downsize the family dollhouse. Join us as we take a stroll or two down memory lane and explore why it’s so hard to let go of items that you have such an emotional connection to.  

To read this essay, and see photos(!), visit www.whogetsthechina.substack.com

If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with someone who might appreciate the conversation. And don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.

Follow us on Spotify or Apple podcasts

Credits:

Produced by Aaron Bryce @ www.bluogden.com

Theme music composed by Greg Fellman @ www.windsandproductions.com

Graphic design by Jenn Beam @ www.jigawattsstudio.com

I often find that every visit to my parents seems to become more of a mission to tackle an endless checklist than an opportunity to spend time with family and build memories in the time we're lucky to have. It's so easy to focus on the to-do list that you lose sight of creating quality time.

I've worked with a range of experts to create my list of Top Ten Strategies to Maximize Quality Time - without sacrificing getting things done, perhaps even by combining the two in unexpected ways.

If there's something I left out, I'd love to hear about it! Maybe we'll do a future episode featuring the best tips I receive.

You can also read this essay as an article on Substack at www.substack.com/whogetsthechina?

If you enjoyed this episode, please share it with someone who might appreciate the conversation. And don’t forget to rate, review, and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.

Follow us on Spotify or Apple podcasts

Email us at [email protected]

Credits:

Produced by Aaron Bryce @ www.bluogden.com 

Theme music composed by Greg Fellman @ www.windsandproductions.com 

Graphic design by Jenn Beam @ www.jigawattsstudio.com