Whole Phil

Welcome to The Whole Phil podcast, I am your host, Phil Reese, the DJ, that's my Facebook name, Really Phil Reese, that's my Twitter, Phillip J Reese, that's my Instagram, my dot com and my real life. This is the podcast where you get your whole Phil. I talk about whatever I want, with whomever I want, and do whatever I want, because there's no rules, no format, and no fucking censors (sorry Mom).

Thanks for joining me today, Monday, November 25th. Let me tell you a little about me, I'm a loving, lovable, fat, hairy, queer, inked, sober, spiritual, vegetarian, feminist radical leftist web developer, video producer and deejay in DC. Now that you know a little about me and where we are, let me know a little about you. Tweet me, at reallyphilreese, I'd love to meet you. Let's start the show.

Today's topic is DJing

I've been DJing professionally for 5 years now at bars, clubs and parties around DC. When I first started, I was not very good, but by plugging away at it, I learned some secrets to success, and today I'm going to discuss just a few of those secrets.

What's the difference between having a DJ and just having a preselected playlist or a jukebox at an event? A DJ is a curator, and can inject human judgement into selecting the music for the event. So to be a DJ you have to be discerning and responsive. That's what differentiates paying you to be there rather than just plugging in an iPod and hitting shuffle. You need to read the room and be willing and able to change the direction of your set on a dime based on the crowd feedback you're getting. This isn't feedback like comment cards, but crowd energy.

Why was I bad when I started DJing? It wasn't because I was messing up the fades between the songs or had lots of goofs. I got a lot of the technical tricks very quickly. But I tried to impose my taste on the audience, rather than being responsive to the crowd. I mean, every DJ imposes their tastes on their set, you'd just be an internet jukebox if you didn't. But I would go in with a set playlist of things I wanted to hear, and play through it regardless of how the crowd reacted. A better DJ connects with their crowd and the set becomes a conversation between them. Remember, when you're a DJ, you're there for them, they're not there for you, unless you're also a producer playing your own work.

And that's why most people wouldn't make good DJs right off the bat. While having an incredibly deep knowledge of music is a requirement for all DJs, the irony is that this can also be an Achilles heel. Most of us with deep knowledge and interest in music tend to also be music snobs, and a stubborn music snob can't connect with their audience. I love deep house music, but it's not everyone's cup of tea. It's not that I no longer have strong opinions about the music I like best, I'm still quite discerning, but I had to develop a little humility and open-mindedness in order to get better. Just because I think I know more about good music than these Queens, doesn't mean I can tyrannically impose myself on their good time. I'm there to serve them. So I need to be open minded about what I'm playing --to a point at least. If you're someone who dislikes more music that you encounter than you like, you probably won't make a good DJ.

Conversely, though, a DJ should never play a song they dislike or are unfamiliar with. Again, you are not a jukebox. Only play what's in your collection, and only add to your collection music you enjoy. I prefer disco, house and electro influenced tunes, and I tend to dislike the most stereotypical elements of trap, dubstep and Big Room, so my collection is tailored to that. That doesn't mean I have NO trap in my collection, I'm just discerning about what I add. And just because you get a request, doesn't necessarily mean it's a good idea to play it, even if it's in your collection. Again, read the room. What gives a DJ set the human element is the discretion the DJ has about what to play in what order. But you must be flexible in terms of artist, type, genre, and era, depending on the mood of the room. So you need to have a deep catalog to select from, which means, you have to tone down your snobbery a bit. There are billions of hours of recorded music in the world. There is no way you can't find any common ground between your tastes and your audience's. But that means you gotta open up your tastes beyond your all time faves.

In terms of getting the mood right, this is an artform, not a science by any means. It takes a lot of practice. At the beginning of a set, I really like to play some very diverse tunes in terms of genre, era, sound, and mood. I pay close attention to the audience and see if I can catch some people's attention. If the mood is dropping in the bar when I'm playing something, I try to avoid playing anything like it again. When I find a group within the audience really responding to something I'm playing, I try to elicit a bigger and bigger response from them, based on the music they initially reacted to. If I'm successful, that mood becomes contagious. Usually a great party starts out with just one person having a good time, and the good time spreads out from them.

Therefore you have to have a deep bench of music to play. Again, a DJ is not a jukebox or an iPod so you should come prepared. But you also don't come prepared with a complete playlist you are married to. When preparing for a gig, you should pick 2-4 times enough music to fill the time you're playing. It helps if you've been to this venue or party before, and experienced a successful set there, so you have some parameters to work with.

More than 2-4 times is too much, and you'll end up overwhelmed, but less than 2xs, your bench is not deep enough. With every track, make sure you've listened to closely for quality, for spots where you can transition, and have thought about other tracks that would pair well with it. And of course, the music you pull for your gig must be diverse, but all must be music you like!

In terms of technique, that's really all learned in person and can't be taught in a podcast. But it's important that if you want to be a DJ, even moreso than your techniques, having the ability to respond to an audience's mood is the most critical factor in your success.

That's it for today. I hope you're enjoying the show. If you like what you hear, please subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts, just search Whole Phil, and drop me a rating on Apple podcasts or Google podcasts if you want me to keep this going. Tweet me at reallyphilreese with topic ideas you think I should cover. Thursday is Thanksgiving! If you're in DC, come see me DJ Thursday for a special Thanksgiving party at JR's bar on 17th Street NW No cover, ever. Learn more about my upcoming DJ gigs at my website phillipjreese.com. Next week I will have a special co-host for a very special episode! Watch out for that. And remember, be good to yourself, love yourself, and we're all in this together.

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Welcome to The Whole Phil podcast, I am your host, Phil Reese, the DJ, that's my Facebook name, Really Phil Reese, that's my Twitter, Phillip J Reese, that's my Instagram, my dot com and my real life. This is the podcast where you get your whole Phil. I talk about whatever I want, with whomever I want, and do whatever I want, because there's no rules, no format, and no bleeping censors (sorry Mom).

Thanks for joining me today, November 17. Let me tell you a little about me, I'm a loving, lovable, fat, hairy, queer, inked, sober, spiritual, vegetarian, feminist radical leftist web developer, video producer and deejay in DC. Now that you know a little about me and where we are, let me know a little about you. Tweet me, at reallyphilreese, I'd love to meet you. Let's start the show.

Today am going to talk about procrastination.

I WANTED to talk about it tomorrow, but I promised you an episode today, and I guess I better stick to it.

I am a natural procrastinator. Why do today what you can put off until ... infinity?

Procrastination isn't just about putting something off. We have to reprioritize and rearrange our schedules sometimes. Just the other day I was planning to get a haircut, but I ran out of time because the very pressing priority of playing with my cats came up. Then just this morning I was going to go to the internet store and return a router that I'm not even using anymore and paying rent on, but then my bed was very warm and comfortable. Then there's the blankets I really need to take to the laundromat.

I will find any excuse to procrastinate. And it's a real problem. Most people wouldn't call me lazy, though.

That's because procrastination isn't about laziness it's about fear and anxiety. We put off those things we aren't sure we're prepared to deal with yet. Almost all the tasks I procrastinate on deal with having to leave my apartment, lug a bunch of stuff around town by myself on public transit, deal with strangers, and be unsure about how much time the task will take. My anxiety over these things lead me to want to banish the thought of the task from my consciousness so I can think of something more pleasant.

We often use these anxieties to give us an excuse to then be lazy instead, but the laziness is a byproduct of the anxieties and procrastination, not the cause of it.

What can I do to combat this then.

Sometimes I use other anxieties as a motivator. In the case of my haircut, I may tell my DJ partner, Ben I'm going to get a fresh cut before our party on Friday. The anxiety of then showing up and looking like a liar Friday will overpower my anxiety about sitting around in the barber shop for God knows how long.

In other cases I may seek out encouragement from someone with more experience. In the case of dealing with my internet company, I have a neighbor who deals with them frequently. I may ask him what his experience at their office was like, so I know a little better what to expect.

Finally, necessity can take care of others. It's getting cold. I need clean blankets. So it's either freeze to death or buck up and haul my stuff to the boring laundromat. In this case, maybe I can ask a friend to join me to make it a little less unpleasant and pass the time.

Knowing your procrastination's source is actually specific anxieties and not just laziness can help you conquer it. What are you procrastinating on? And what fears or anxieties might be behind that? Is there anyone you can talk to to help you alleviate that fear?

So knock something out today you've been procrastinating on!

That's it for today. I hope you're enjoying the show. If you like what you hear, please subscribe wherever you listen to podcasts, just search Whole Phil, and drop me a rating on Apple podcasts or Google podcasts if you want me to keep this going. Tweet me at reallyphilreese with topic ideas you think I should cover. If you're in DC, come see me Monday for Showtunes Sing-A-Long and Thursday for the weekly Top 10 countdown following the Drag Race UK finale, both at JR's. Then Friday, the 22nd, join me and Ben for Kicks & Giggles Go POP! at the Green Lantern. All of this info can be found on my website phillipjreese.com. And remember, be good to yourself, love yourself, and we're all in this together.

Support Whole Phil by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/whole-phil

Find out more at https://whole-phil.pinecast.co

This podcast is powered by Pinecast.

Welcome to The Whole Phil podcast, I am your host, Phil Reese, the DJ, that's my Facebook name, ReallyPhilReese, that's my Twitter, Phillip J Reese, that's my Instagram, my dot com and my real life. This is the podcast where you get your whole Phil. I talk about whatever I want, with whomever I want, and do whatever I want, because there's no rules, no format, and no bleeping censors (sorry Mom).

Thanks for joining me today, Sunday, November 10. Let me tell you a little about me, I'm a loving, lovable, fat, hairy, queer, inked, sober, spiritual, vegetarian, feminist radical leftist web developer, video producer and deejay in DC. Now that you know a little about me and where we are, let me know a little about you. Tweet me, at reallyphilreese, I'd love to meet you. Let's start the show.

Today I want to talk about one of my favorite topics: self care! Self care isn't just about putting mud on your face and cucumbers over your eyes and splurging on fine leather goods -- which, as an ethical vegetarian I never do anyway, but you have your own values.

Self care tracks back to a fundamentally important piece of what I believe the meaning of life is and why I believe we're here. So let me start there.

I believe the meaning of life is to serve others, and I believe we're on this planet -- or if you're listening from Nebulon 16, in this Universe -- to leave it better off than we found it. The reason we exist is to improve the reality we have contact with, for the other beings in it.

So, how could self care possibly fit into that? Self care seems selfish on the surface, right? Well, you may know that the theory of the mind is that the mind is theoretically split into 3 parts: the id, the ego and the superego. The id is our basest instincts, the most selfish, self-serving proclivities we have. Immediate gratification and crass consumerism comes from here. The ego is the part of our mind that deals with rational thought, socializing, moderating ourselves, judgement, and so on. The superego is basically our conscience, the part of our psyche that acts as the counterbalance to our id.

Usually when people are talking trash about someone else's ego, they're really talking about their id. Or at least implying their ego is out of balance and leaning too much toward the id. These all-id people lack empathy and are completely self-serving. I would say our President is all id. Kanye is all id. Martin Shkreli is all id. Jeffrey Epstein was all id. Most internet trolls are all id. Cult leaders are all id.

On the opposite side, being biased too far toward the superego is not good either. Being all superego means being full of guilt, regret, anxiety, trauma, resentments, lacking self-confidence, and self-esteem. It's paralyzing.

A healthy ego is balanced between; making sure that the person is tending to themselves and their well being without being selfish.

A healthy psyche makes for a better performing mind. Someone with a fucked up psyche cannot function well in the real world. If you're paralyzed with doubt, fear and anxiety, how can you make the world better? How can you serve others.

In Alcoholics Anonymous we talk sometimes about keeping your side of the street clean. That is, to say, before you can effectively help someone else you have to get things in order with yourself first. That's why self care is CRITICAL for being of service to others. If you're taking care of yourself you can be fully present for others and their needs. Self care is actually step 1 to saving the world.

So what is self care, and what isn't self care?

Self care is about putting your important needs first, but not about putting everything you want first. It's not about feeling happy; it's about feeling safe, secure and at peace, and that feeling can make you happy.

If you're sick, tired, hungry, irritated, emotionally hurting or physically in pain, you can't be present for the needs of others. Getting enough rest, staying hydrated, eating well, seeing doctors, taking your medications, and extricating from your life people and things that take advantage of you, disrespect you, or hurt you is fundamental self care.

The news is terrible to read these days, and we can get caught going down a rabbithole of despair when we're too exposed to it. And if I'm in a rabbithole of despair, I'm paralyzed. I can't do the stuff I need to do.

While it's important we don’t just stick our fingers in our ears, cover our eyes and pretend bad stuff isn't happening -- that's id right there -- you need to taper your news diet so that it's helping to keep you energized for the fight, not overwhelming you with disillusionment. When the news is starting to make you feel irritable, turn it off. Close Facebook or Twitter, and go consume some content that makes you feel less anxious instead. Or better yet, turn it off, and go volunteer for something worthwhile.

Every day take time to make sure your needs are met: you're rested, you're fed, your bills are paid. And also try to work meditation into your day. I recommend meditating a little in the morning to help you start the day with a peaceful, happy mind, and at night, but I also stop and take small meditation breaks during the day when the stress and anxiety are getting to me. And I'm finding the more I commit to my meditation practice, the more dividends it pays. I'm less anxious, less reactivate and more pleasant to those around me.

And sometimes I just play a quick game on my phone, or do a little Sudoku, and concentrate on slowing my breathing down. Anything to get me back to that peaceful but energized feeling that I need to be at my best.

And of course having routines, especially when you wake up, and before bed, is critical to regulating that psyche and feeling secure. I recently blogged on phillipjreese.com about night rituals, you should check it out for more on that.

Having a psyche that is in the right state helps me do the work I believe in doing: making life better for other beings.

That's it for now. Thanks for joining me today. I'm probably going to be releasing these episodes only once a week at first until I really get going. So for the next few months, I'll probably be dropping them on Sundays or early in the week once a week. But someday I hope to be releasing them more rapidly.

If you're in the DC area, I hope you can join me at one of my upcoming DJ gigs! I'll be at JR's on 17th Street for Showtunes Sing-A-Long, tomorrow night the 11th starting at 8:30pm, get there early and plan to stick around a while if you plan on making any requests, because there's always way more requests than I have time to play, and I generally stop even accepting requests by 10:30 or 11, because by then the list is always full. On Thursday come for our watch party for RuPaul's Drag Race UK at 8 hosted by the one and only Vagenesis of the Haus of Stone, followed by my weekly all request top 10 Music video countdown. Vote for your favorite new music videos at bit.ly/JRsThursTop10VOTE, and I'll be accepting your votes all the way til the lip sync on drag race, and you can vote as often as you want, so vote every day and see your favorite rise to the top! I've got another party at The Green Lantern with my friend Ben -- together we are Kicks and Giggles -- coming up Friday, November 22, Kicks and Giggles Go Pop, an all inclusive queer underwear dance party! All genders, gender expressions and body types are welcomed and encouraged, it's a safe space to wear whatever you want and dance however you want to our funky house music. No cover at ANY of those events. I hope to see you there. Tweet me about your self care routines at reallyphilreese and like me on Facebook just search Phil Reese the DJ. Thanks for listening and I'll be back very soon. Take care of yourself, love yourself and remember we're all in this together.

Support Whole Phil by donating to their Tip Jar: https://tips.pinecast.com/jar/whole-phil

Find out more at https://whole-phil.pinecast.co

This podcast is powered by Pinecast.

What the Whole Phil podcast is all about.

Find out more at https://whole-phil.pinecast.co

This podcast is powered by Pinecast.