Wilderness Wanderings

***Our apologies for the delay in posting this past Sunday's sermon: here it is!***

An extended Sunday Sermon edition of Wilderness Wanderings! The texts come from Matthew 3:13-17, from the New International Version of the Bible. Dive In discussion questions are below for further reflection! To see this sermon in the context of the worship service it comes from, find it here on YouTube. Or, head to our website to connect with the worshiping community of Immanuel CRC: immanuelministries.ca

DIVE IN QUESTIONS

1. What stands out to you from hearing these verses? Is God offering an invitation or a challenge to you through those words? Take time to pray about it.

2. What might have been some of John's problems with baptizing Jesus (why didn't he want to do it)?

3. In what ways did Jesus humble himself to identify with us? How deep did it go? What were the limits to Jesus' identification with us?

4. What were the three gifts that Jesus received as he went up out of the waters?

5. What hangs ups might we have with hearing and receiving these words and gifts of Jesus' baptism as our own?

6. How will you live in light of your baptismal identity in Jesus this week, knowing that you are a child of God who has a place of home and belonging with him? How might it change your interactions with yourself, your day, and with others?

Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace (Ephesians 6:14-15).

Imagine a soldier with the best weapons, the warmest clothing, and the safest helmet. Now you look down…barefoot! How effective will she be in battle? How many miles can he march? In the rough conditions of the battle, feet will be bleeding and sore too soon.

In ancient days a variety of footwear was used by soldiers. Most common were something called greaves. These protected the legs and feet against cold and injury. Soldiers used half-boots or sandals that were hobnailed, spiked, giving traction.

Our text is not concerned with the type of footwear, but on the preparation of the feet. We are encouraged to lay aside every hindrance and to be prepared both for journey and war. By nature, many of us dislike exertion, especially of the spiritual kind. Rough roads and other obstacles slow our progress, and we are discouraged by the smallest annoyance. Thus, Paul holds out the 'gospel of peace' as essential for the Christian life.

How do feet "fitted with the readiness that comes from gospel of peace" help us to stand against the attacks of the devil? Paul takes his cue from Isaiah 52:7, "How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news, who proclaim peace, who brings good tidings, who proclaim salvation, who say to Zion, 'Your God reigns.'" Paul suggests that there is more to this than just proclamation.

"Readiness" suggests all of life. Knowledge of the gospel should make us alert (6:18) and ready for life. Since we have been taught in the school of Christ, we are careful about our speech and actions. We do not live in the dark. We live wisely, redeeming the time and understanding the will of the Lord, not only sharing the good news, but also being agents of peace and love, ready to do the whole will of God.

What is the gospel of peace? It is the message that we are reconciled to God through Jesus Christ. Nothing else gives peace to the conscience. Christ is our peace (2:14). Without Christ we are separated from God because of our sin. But now, through Christ, we are united with God and with each other, a new humanity. God has made peace with us through the blood of Christ. This is the peace of the gospel, God's gift.

Cosmic peace, global harmony is God's pledge to the world (1:10; 3:10). When it is realized in the Church, the death knell sounds for the cosmic powers opposing God. Yet, when we demonstrate the peace of God these forces intensify their opposition. Our preparation for standing firm against the fragmenting powers of evil is the harmony produced by the gospel. We become the world's peacemakers.

Peace with God results in peace on earth. That's what the angels said, "Glory to God in the highest and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests" (Luke 2:14). Only the lowly shepherds knew that Jesus had come and already the angels declared peace on earth. Especially in the Church we need to live that peace. One of the devil's most effective means of neutralizing a church or a Christian is to get a fight going! Think about it! How well do you pray when you're fighting with your spouse? How many people are attracted to a church at war? Do we take every concern prayerfully to God when our minds are not at peace?

When we are ready to fight, ready to turn viciously on each other...let's turn instead to Jesus with a plea for His peace (James 4:1-7). Elsewhere, Paul tells us how people whose feet are fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace act: Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful (Colossians 3:13-15).

Is that asking too much? Not at all, since we live under this blessing:

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. (Ephesians 3:17-21).

Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place… (Ephesians 6:14)

In Isaiah 59, an important background to Ephesians 6 emerges. The whole chapter is worth a read (and is, I think, an excellent description of the "powers and principalities" of evil Paul has in mind in this section). Here's an excerpt—this is Isaiah describing the state of affairs among God's people:

"…justice is driven back, and righteousness stands at a distance; truth has stumbled in the streets, honesty cannot enter. Truth is nowhere to be found, and whoever shuns evil becomes a prey. The Lord looked and was displeased that there was no justice. He saw that there was no one, he was appalled that there was no one to intervene; so his own arm achieved salvation for him, and his own righteousness sustained him. He put on righteousness as his breastplate, and the helmet of salvation on his head…" (Is. 59:14-17).

When Paul talks about the armor of God, he is quite literally speaking of God's own armor. Think back to our series of 1 Samuel and David's journey of growing up to be king. In both the chapter 17 Goliath episode and the running-from-Saul episode of chapter 21, David is confronted with a question: will he fight the Lord's battles in Saul's armor, or in God's (i.e. nothing but trust in God's own deliverance)? In the first case, David chooses God's armor with childlike faith. But in the second instance, David is quite open to whatever armor will get the job done—any means necessary. He is in the wilderness of the "the devil's schemes" where "truth is nowhere to be found and whoever shuns evil becomes a prey." But in this wilderness it proves to be true that the one who asks, receives. When David asks for armor in the house of God—God's armor is what he receives there. It is a gift.

You will notice that in both the context of Isaiah and the life of David, the sort of truth we're talking about is the sort of honesty and integrity of character that Pastor Michael spoke of yesterday. The same is true of righteousness. In Isaiah, righteousness is said to "stand at a distance," because "whoever shuns evil becomes a prey," a target. The Lord is appalled at this—that no righteous person can be found to intervene against injustice and dishonesty. All the righteous have shrunk back from the fight. They have not stood their ground.

Notice again that doctrinal truth and personal, ethical righteousness is not the issue here. If these were the issues at stake, then "any means necessary" to hold up the doctrine or our own reputation would be perfectly justified, even if it means running roughshod over others causing pain, mistrust, and material hardship. But in fact, the "means" do matter, because honesty and the failure to stand for what is right when neighbours are being unjustly treated is the problem.

Thankfully, God himself comes to do what his people will not. He comes as the righteous one who stands for the right and who achieves salvation. And so come the familiar words of Isaiah 60:1, "Arise, shine, for your light has come." We are the ones now standing in the light of Christ, the very Lord of Isaiah who strapped on the breastplate of righteousness. He has won the salvation. Both forgiveness for the perpetual dishonesty and failures to stand up for what's right of his people, but also the setting right of injustices so that honesty and righteousness might flourish among people.

When we "put on Christ" in our baptism, his armor becomes our own. He has won for us this ground on which we stand. He arms us with his own armor. He commands us not to advance, nor to retreat, nor to give up the fight and throw his armor on the floor. All we must do is stand firm where we are, in his armor.

In practice, this means quite a simple thing, I think. It means a willingness to be the odd one out when someone is being picked on, when a "coarse joke" is being told, or when some injustice, cruel action, or power grab is being perpetrated whether in a committee, in a group of friends or colleagues, or on the street. Very often, doing nothing more than standing firm and saying: "I can't go along with this," is this righteousness of God's armor that stands firm in justice and truth.

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. (Ephesians 3:17-21).

Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist… (Ephesians 6:14).

Having planted our feet firmly on the ground, aware that we are in Christ, the Lord—surrounded and guarded not by our own might, but by His mighty power, let us get dressed up in the armour that our Father so gracious provides for us. And let us stand against the attacks of our enemy.

The first piece armour is the belt of truth which we buckle around our waists.

"Having girded your middles with truth" is a more accurate rendering of the Greek. It shows a deliberate action we must take. We must put the armour on; it does not appear on us by magic. As Pastor Anthony said yesterday, standing in not loitering. Paul says we must equip ourselves so that we can stand. If we don't get our minds involved, we will fail. Spiritual battle is not done simply by attending worship or by claiming we are Christians. Unless we personally put on the armour, we will not stand firm.

Before the armour can be put on, the garments underneath must be bound together. The metaphor of girding describes fastening loose fitting clothing securely around the waist. This made rapid movement easier and was vital preparation for any vigorous activity, such as running a race or fighting a battle. The most famous Biblical example is the Israelites leaving Egypt; God told them to tuck their cloaks into their belts (Exodus 12:11).

Mostly likely, Paul had Isaiah 11:5 in mind when he wrote our text. Isaiah says this about our Messiah-King, the shoot of Jesse, "Righteousness will be his belt and faithfulness the sash around his waist". Thus, it is not doctrinal truths that Paul is referring to, but truth in the sense of integrity, truth in the inward being. The belt of truth suggests that our character and activities are shaped by the gospel. If we claim to be a Christian, we will desire to live as Jesus lives.

He has already instructed us "to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness" (4:25) and told us that "the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth" (5:9). If this sounds too difficult, fear not, Jesus prays for us, "protect them from the evil one...Sanctify them by the truth; your word is truth" (John 17:15, 17). While we are fastening our spiritual belt, the Spirit is simultaneously teaching and training us.

Committing to living in the truth will probably mean facing some unpleasant, even ugly moments. It might mean opening to the light of Christ some dark secrets we've carefully hidden away and making them right. Satan loves the secret sins that we ignore. In those dark corners of our minds, he causes awful rot and infections that can affect our spiritual health, weakening us. For over a year, King David lied about his sin with Bathsheba and his murder of Uriah. Psalms 32 tells of the price he paid, "When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy on me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer" (3,4).

With the belt of truth buckled firmly in place, we seek to live by the light and in the light. We desire to grow up into Christ, putting away the deeds of darkness – anger, fighting, envy, lusts. It means following God's example, walking in the way of love, seeking out the will of God. Our goal is to allow all our words and actions to flow from the goodness, righteous and truth of Jesus.

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. (Ephesians 3:17-21).

For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. (Ephesians 6:12-13)

As Pastor Michael mentioned yesterday, the command we're given in the Armor of God passage of Ephesians 6 is not to go marching or retreating, but rather, to stand. That word "stand" is repeated again here—twice. And it will not be the last time you hear it.

In this, Paul is echoing Jesus himself, who in the great end-times passage of Matthew 24 speaks of all sorts of terrible things: "wars and rumors of wars," "famines and earthquakes," persecution, and death. At that times, he says "many will turn away from the faith and will betray and hate each other." Indeed, "the love of most will grow cold, but the one who stands firm to the end will be saved." (See Mt. 24:4-13)

The question naturally arises: if all we're to do is stand—why does Paul resort to battle imagery like armor to describe our stand? I think the battle imagery keeps us alert to the fact that we had better have our wicks trimmed and lamps lit. That there is an urgency to our standing. A preparedness that comes with it. We're not loitering. There's an enemy prowling around like a lion, looking for someone to devour. There is evil crouching at our door. The battle is real, even if our only orders are to stand. Who is this enemy? In a word: evil. Not sin, but evil. And we can very quickly stumble down an endless trail of speculation should we attempt to surmise much more than that. But that's not the point. Notice that what Paul displays most of all here, is restraint. He does not indulge our curiosities on evil. He mostly seems interested in making one, single distinction by telling us what the enemy is not: the enemy is not the flesh and blood people with names and faces around us. Those people we are called to love. They may sin, they may even by vectors of some of the evil we experience—but they are not themselves the enemy. And in standing against the day of evil, our love for them is not to grow cold.

We hold two things in tension then: firstly, that our enemy is disembodied and mostly beyond our perception, but secondly, that the battle is nevertheless still real. That's all the more we get from Paul on the subject in this letter. Paul does not give us the tools for deciphering the cryptic work of evil. Instead, he gives us the armor of God. And what are we to do with this armor in the battle against the enemy? We could go on the offensive, crusading against evil and defining ourselves by what we're against. We could go on the defensive, cowering in fear and paranoia of not knowing where evil will come from or how it will show itself. We could also plug our ears, stick our heads in the sand and ignore it altogether, living with Laodicean lukewarmness. But all of these miss the call of Ephesians 6. Which is not a call to retreat, nor a call to advance onward, nor a call to loiter—it is instead, simply a call to stand firm where we are. And where we are, is not in the clutches of evil. Where we are is in Christ, the Lord—surrounded and guarded not by our own might, but by His mighty power.

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. (Ephesians 3:17-21).

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes (Ephesians 6:11-12).

We come now to the ending of Paul's little letter to the Ephesians. There is one more major topic he wants to address. It's a passage that often comes up in conversations and sermons on 'spiritual warfare'. Since the term remains largely undefined, I do not find it very useful. Further, this passage does not deal with 'warfare'. It does deal with armour and thus it is easy to slip into military language.

Yet, we will notice repeatedly as we ponder these closing verses that Paul does not tell us to engage the enemy. His repeated instruction is "to stand." The devil is still trying to take us down, but rather than go on the offensive against him, we are to stand, deflecting his attacks with the armour of the gospel and the strength of our God.

It would be very odd for Paul to end his letter with instructions on how to fight against the devil, since throughout he has argued that the battle is already accomplished, the victory is secure. Let us review a few things so that we land firmly on our feet.

First, Jesus is introduced as Lord (1:3). In fact, Paul uses "Lord" twenty-six times in this letter to refer to Jesus. Our God and Father has appointed Jesus as the supreme Lord of the universe, the head of all of creation, and he has authority over all things in heaven and on earth (Matthew 28:16-20). Further, all of history is moving towards the goal of bringing "unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ" (1:10). Satan and his armies are simply incapable of hindering the purposes of God.

Second, in his exaltation to the heavenly realms, Jesus overcame the most powerful enemies in creation: death and the spiritual powers. Jesus is seated at the right hand of God "far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every name that is invoked, not only in the present age but also in the one to come" (1:21). All things have been placed under his feet (1:22), including Satan and his schemes. There is no need to fret.

Third, God has manifested his extraordinary power in the church, giving life to those he has resurrected from death (2:1, 4-5), and delivering them from the extraordinary powers that had dominion over creation: the world, the Devil, and our fallen sinful nature (2:1-3). The church already participates in Christ's victory, although not fully, and has received the Spirit as first fruits and guarantee (1:13-14) of our final and complete redemption.

Fourth, the head and Lord of all creation, Jesus Christ, is now the head of the church and fills his bride with his incomparable great power, through his Spirit (1:18-19, 23; 2:21-22).

Fifth, the church is God's poem (2:10) and the first fruits of his new creation; we are God's new humanity (2:15) that has been elected, called, and sanctified to live for his glory (1:6, 12, 14).

Shalom (2:14, 15, 16, 17), unity (1:10; 2:14-17) and holiness (1:1,4; 2:21; 3:18; 5:3) are the main manifestations of this new society. By God's grace and power (2:4-7), the church is now composed of peoples from all the nations. We are called to live a life worthy of our calling, in unity, with behaviour characterized by truth, justice, and love. These are the virtues that make it possible in everyday communal life to "keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace" (Eph. 4:1-3). We are to walk in the way of love (5:1-2) which expresses itself in mutual submission and service in the church (4:1-16) and family life (5:18-6:9).

We are called to live in this world as a testimony and manifestation of God's gracious love, redemption and shalom to all peoples (2:11-22), including the rulers and authorities in the heavenly places (3:10). The devil does all in his power to undermine the unity of the church and lure us into unholiness. It is against such schemes that we are called to stand. And to stand, we are equipped with the armour God himself gives us, while he infuses us with his own power.

Paul laid the groundwork for all of this when he wrote,

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. (Ephesians 3:17-21).

Slaves, obey your earthly masters with respect and fear, and with sincerity of heart, just as you would obey Christ. Obey them not only to win their favor when their eye is on you, but as slaves of Christ, doing the will of God from your heart. Serve wholeheartedly, as if you were serving the Lord, not people, because you know that the Lord will reward each one for whatever good they do, whether they are slave or free. And masters, treat your slaves in the same way. Do not threaten them, since you know that he who is both their Master and yours is in heaven, and there is no favoritism with him. (Ephesians 6:5-9)

In this section on marriage, parenting, and now workplace relations—Paul has kept the "household code" of the Roman culture in tact. The Roman "Household Code," which is essentially what we find here in Ephesians 5:22-6:9, was a pretty commonly agreed upon organizational chart for how a household was to be run. You can find the same set of relationships and regulations in Xenophon, who had written one of the more prominent codes, but Aristotle and other notable ancients had also contributed.

The ancients believed that the household was an essential building block and a microcosm of the wider society. They believed that however it went with the household determined how it would go with the city and the state. They were keen, therefore, to organize it well. Households in this system were not just family homes as they are for us: they were also the place of business. Commerce and family were tied up into one. The head of the household was not just head of the family, but also of the business, trades, and agriculture carried out under the roof, within the courts, and on the land that constituted the household's property. In this day, everyone "worked from home."

So here's the problem. These slaves, masters, spouses, and children all start attending a house church in their household together (or in someone else's). Paul begins to preach that "Christ has broken down the dividing walls" and that there is "freedom in Christ" where "there is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female." After such rousing sermons, how should these household members now relate? Is it a free-for-all where everyone goes their own way and does what they want?

No, says Paul. Don't start a revolution in Rome by overthrowing the household. Keep the household code. Keep the roles and station that you were in when Christ found you. But do it now for a different reason: out of reverence for Christ. Of course, in the long haul, this minor tweak proved no small thing at all. It took a long time, but it was out of reverence for Christ that slavery would eventually be abolished in the Christian West. Out of reverence for Christ, women received the ability to vote. Out of reverence for Christ, laws to protect children from exasperation were put in place. Out of reverence for Christ, the curse of Genesis 3 has even begun to experience its reversal in Christ as husband no longer rules over wife in this increasingly egalitarian society.

All the same, we will never be free of culturally defined social roles in society. To get to the point of today's passage, we no longer relate as slaves and masters, but now as employers and employees. But the principle remains.

Do you work as an employee as if Christ himself were your boss. Do your best work—not for the sake of an inept, corrupt, or broken institution, nor for a paycheck, nor for the benefits. Do your best work for Christ, out of reverence for him. He'll reward the good that you do and the gifts that you use, regardless of what your company does.

Same thing for bosses. Doesn't matter how lazy, inept, or selfish your team or employees are: do not resort to the lesser threats and cut-throat tactics that mark the rest of the workplace. Give them your best work—care for them and manage well as if Christ himself had entrusted them to you. Don't use your power to your own advantage, because you have none over Christ. He doesn't pick favorites or defer to seniority—so be humble and give them your best.

In all these things: in our homes and our work, may our lives in this world and culture be marked by our reverence for Christ. And, may the world see it, rejoice because of it, and be perhaps even been attracted enough to wonder about this Jesus we revere.

A Sunday Sermon edition of Wilderness Wanderings! The text of Matthew 3:1-12. Dive In discussion questions are below for further reflection!

To see this sermon in the context of the worship service it comes from, find it here on YouTube. Or, head to our website to connect with the worshiping community of Immanuel CRC: immanuelministries.ca

1. What images do you have of 'rolling out the red carpet'? How well does that compare with John's ministry?
2. What does it mean to repent? How does the Law help? What is our preferred response to our own sin?
3. What does John's baptism symbolize?
4. What does John say about his message and ministry?
5. We cannot avoid the kingdom's coming. It comes with fire. Is it a promise or a threat to you?

Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ… Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. "Honor your father and mother"—which is the first commandment with a promise— "so that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth." Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord (Ephesians 5:21, 6:1-4).

Did you know children play "catch" with their parents all day long? Children spend their lives catching how parents live, catching how they talk, catching their ways of responding, and catching their walk with God - or lack thereof. Faith is contagious. So is apathy. Since parents set the patterns, I will reflect mostly on parenting here.

According to historical sources, a Roman father had absolute power over his family. He could sell them as slaves, make them work his fields in chains, punish as he liked, he could even inflict the death penalty on his child. Children were a nuisance; unwanted babies were abandoned, the deformed and sick were killed; children were ignored or used for parental purposes.

In contrast, Jesus said, 'Let the little children come to me' and 'to such belongs the kingdom of God.' We notice that Paul follows Jesus rather than the culture of the Roman Empire. The Christian family, like the church, is lived under this rubric, 'submit to each other out of reverence for Christ'. In the marriage relationship, Paul calls us to a better way. Here too.

But we are far removed from Roman culture. The world has many cultures, and each has its own patterns of family life. Paul is not giving us a manual on the parent child relationship that is transcultural, nor a textbook for successful Christian parenting. Parenting will look different in each culture. We are not instructed to abandon our cultural patterns. Rather, we are to engage with them out of "reverence for Christ" while learning "mutual submission."

If I may say it, we are not used to this. Ours is an aggressively competitive culture, in which we measure ourselves against one another: educational credentials, athletic competition, salary, popularity, fashion, appearance, or performance. Competition is bred into us. We evaluate the people around us as winners and losers. We want to win, in family life too.

The family is the setting in which competition does the most damage. Whether it is between family members or against another family, competition undermines intimacy and hinders Christian maturity. Our goal is not to win, but to grow up in Christ by being "subject to one another," even in the family. But it doesn't come easy. It is an art form, best learned in the family setting.

Submission means that we set aside our own agendas for the sake of the other. Parents need to wrestle away the goals and dreams they have for their children. "Do not exasperate them." Even in parenting, we follow the way of Christ. The measuring stick for maturity for the Christian is the "measure of the full stature of Christ." We pay attention to the ways that Jesus forgave, loved, touched lepers, received outsiders, prayed for his friends.

Partnered with mutual submission is reverence for Christ. This is an attitude or disposition that acknowledges God's presence, recognizing that he is more and better than we are. It begins at the burning bush, as we remove our sandals. It permeates our relations as we recognize and reverence Christ in every person we meet, even our parents and children. Fear of the Lord opens our spirits, our souls, to become what we are not yet, growing up into Christ.

We play catch with our children all day long. What balls do we throw their way? If our children do not see us practicing submission, why should they obey us? If they do not see the 'fear of the Lord' in us, where will they see it? There is no manual for success here. Yet, the fear of the Lord includes a deep trust in God's baptismal promises. No matter what happens in life, he remains our faithful God. We entrust our parents and our children to him.

Let this blessing encourage both parent and child:

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen. (Ephesians 3:17-21).

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated their own body, but they feed and care for their body, just as Christ does the church—for we are members of his body. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:25-33)

In Russian novelist Dostoevsky's book, The Brothers Karamazov, there is a line that goes like this: "The more I love humanity in general, the less I love man in particular."

Many of us are full of great ideals of who and what a spouse should be and do—or the church, or humanity. We aspire for our society to be one of love for all instead of hate for any. We hold up ideals like a happy marriage where our spouse always has time and capacity for us and with whom we never fight. We seek a church where everyone gets along, holds the same beliefs, and serves shoulder to shoulder in common purpose. But, the more we love our ideals of what the church, society, marriage, or people ought to be, the less likely we are to love any particular person we meet in the church, society, or even our marriage. Frankly, none of them can possibly measure up.

A good example is the current claims flowing across the pages of the Banner and elsewhere in our denominational discourse that suggest that for the sake of our strong ideals on marriage, there is no possible way that we can remain together in the church with other Christians who accept same-sex marriage. This always strikes me as ironic in light of Ephesians 5. The mysterious one-flesh union Paul is ultimately alluding to is the union of Christ and his body, the church. "What God has joined together, let no one separate." But for the sake of our ideals on marriage, we are ready to tear apart the greater mystery-of-union that is the body of Christ, of which marriage at its best is only an image and foretaste. It seems to me that we have missed the point of this passage entirely.

Jesus came in the flesh so that all of these ethereal ideals about "God's love" and "holiness" might be made concrete and particular among real sin-broken persons with names and faces. Paul alludes to this loving way of Jesus as he invites us too, to make our love concrete and particular in what for many is the most basic, personal, and daily relationship of our lives: marriage.

Loving our neighbour—even our spouse—as our own self requires surrendering our selfishness and our ideals for who the other ought already to be. We have to get past these so that we can meet the person in front of us as they are: stained, wrinkled and blemished. I promise you: they are not ideal. But they are the concrete, personal, and particular one—wrinkles and all—to whom we have become united and through whom we will learn what it means to give ourselves up in love as Christ loved the church.

We err when we assume divorce or church division is the only way forward to the radiant ideals or holiness we seek. This would be as if Christ came to earth, saw our blemishes, and decided to turn right around and abandon us, keeping his holiness to himself because we just didn't meet the ideal. It doesn't work. The cart is on the wrong side of the horse.

Jesus's love reveals a better way—he kept his commitment to us in love, despite the blemishes inherent in his church: "while we were still sinners, he [gave himself up] for us" in love (Romans 5:8). It is the commitment—the mystery of union—practiced daily in love among the particular people we live and worship with that gives context to the feeding, care, and cleansing that slowly (and with much difficulty) brings forth the ideal within the body. Not the other way round.

I think then, rather than loving our ideals of a spouse or of the church, the call is to love instead what we have been given: a real spouse and a real church. Wrinkles and all. Trusting that in time, through the mystery of union in our church and in our marriage, "we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ. [For] from him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work" (Ephesians 4:15-16).