Letter to the Producer — Winds of W Mountain🪶 Lake Correspondence • 🌲 Chateaugay Lake Dispatch • 📻 ON AIRThe Gitaskog’s Little Nippers (Toe-Nibblers in the Narrows) 🐍🦶📅 December 29, 2024📍 Chateaugay Lake Narrows🎙️ Winds of W Mountain
Dear Sir,
I’ve got a bone to pick with you—respectfully, begrudgingly, and with my hat still on 🎩—about your latest Winds of W Mountain episode, “The Gitaskog’s Little Nippers.” The show warms a winter night fine enough, but you handed the tale to Roy Cootey like he was a courthouse stenographer instead of the North Country’s reigning chaos engine 😏.
Roy can spin, I’ll grant it. He likely polished up half-heard Banner House yarns over a sarsaparilla, then let ’em loose louder than a loon 🦆. But the true Chateaugay Lake way was never one voice—it was a whole room: Delroy roaring “fire and brimstone,” Aunt Ida correcting him mid-sentence, Pa pretending skepticism while grinning through it all. That squabble-and-chorus is the music of the legend.
What you missed, dear producer, was the glorious pile-up: interruptions, arguments, and embellishments—each teller trying to outdo the last—until the story collapses under its own splendid weight 🎭.
Now—Roy’s toe-nibbling baby serpents in the Narrows? Nearly made me laugh. Nearly 😤. But it barely scratches what the old folks swore. I recall a Banner House night when Uncle Chester insisted the brood sabotaged a whole steamboat—nibbled the wooden hull till it leaked like a sieve 🚢🪵.
Worse, Roy made the Gitaskog sound like a cheeky prankster. The creature’s supposed to be an awe-maker—lake-deep, wind-driven, and big enough to rearrange a man’s certainty 🌊👀—at least, depending on which liar you trust.
So here’s my proposition: dedicate an episode to Banner House nights—the true format. Bring on the cross-talk. Let voices overlap. Let the tale argue with itself. I’ll bring notes (napkins, envelopes, whatever survived the stove heat) so no detail gets lost ✉️📝.
Tell Roy his version has merit, but the truth—or our local version of it—is stranger than fiction. And you, sir: keep the episodes coming. Just remember… you ain’t heard nothin’ yet 🔥.
With begrudging approval and stiff compliments,
Alonzo Bellows
Rt. 2, Chateaugay, NY
P.S. If you need a guest who can outspin Roy any day of the week, you know where to find me 😉.
