Now, I'm not known for doing political songs but when Lauren Loomer called the new pope, Pope Leo XVI, a "WOKE MARXIST POPE", and then several people online (most notably Schmoyoho on Twitter and LouisaTheLast on BlueSky) said you could sing that phrase to the tune of "Pink Pony Club" by Chappell Roan, I knew what had to be done. Originally released as a shorter version on my TikTok, YouTube, and Instagram channels (as well as my Patreon), after popular demand I now present you all with the full version. Enjoy.