Women Rewriting the Rules

It’s the holidays and you know what that means…Time to get your buttons pushed. I mean, if that’s not your experience, that’s AWESOME for you… Really, you should join a raffle or something because you’re definitely one of the lucky ones. 

For the rest of us, chances are that this holiday season, we will find ourselves reverting to habits we thought we had already moved past just because of the way our families get under our skin. That’s normal. And that’s where boundaries come into play.

But because the boundaries we set might be counter to our family's expectations, it can be tough to find the balance between being flexible and maintaining healthy boundaries. This holiday season, position yourself for success by listening to this episode.

To celebrate the launch of the Women Rewriting the Rules podcast, we want to pamper you with the BEST holiday giveaway we could think of! Click here to join.

"In the long run, if we allow our boundaries to be stepped on and feel bad about that, it’s going to reduce the amount of joy we feel in that experience."  ~  Ashley Baxter

In This Episode:

- Types of boundaries and their benefits

- 3 Tactical strategies to help you communicate and honor your boundaries

- Get clear on what you want ahead of time

- You can be flexible but still maintain your habits

- Avoid resentment and bitterness

- Useful tip to reset your relationship – in just one question

- Why empathy is required

- Manage expectations - It’s not one and done!

Connect with Sumi Krishnan:

- Instagram

Connect with Ashley Baxter:

- Website

These stats made me sad recently. Did you know that 38% of women are anxious about the cost of the holidays?

This is probably one of the biggest reasons that 33% of Americans go into debt for the holiday season. Going into debt over things that aren’t even really necessities is kind of crazy, isn’t it?

Ensure that you’re not part of this statistic by listening to this episode for tips and tricks on how to avoid overspending AND how to make more money.

To celebrate the launch of the Women Rewriting the Rules podcast, we want to pamper you with the BEST holiday giveaway we could think of! Click here to join.

"Whether you’re trying to save money or make more money, just being more thoughtful in your finances around the holidays is something you want to dedicate time to."  ~  Ashley Baxter

In This Episode:

- Reviewing expenses during the holidays can help you avoid needless spending

- Free apps and sites that could be useful for saving money

- Use credit cards that will give you perks that fit your unique needs at this moment

- What to do if you realize you don’t have enough money coming in

- Side hustles galore – BUT make sure it won’t drain you!

- Take advantage of opportunities that aren’t a trade of time for dollars

Resources:

- Truebill, now called Rocket Money

- Honey Coupons

Connect with Sumi Krishnan:

- Instagram

Connect with Ashley Baxter:

- Website

Thanksgiving has passed but hold on, don’t stop giving thanks just yet.

It’s the holiday season, so you’ve probably seen a thousand cheesy posts on the internet, by now, about choosing gratitude or having a grateful heart and the like. Sometimes that does feel like a lot of woo-woo talk when you’re facing the daily difficulties of life, doesn’t it? But guys, we’re here to tell you, those cheesy posts are actually on to something.

Science backs this up so roll with us for a moment. This isn’t about some fake sense of positivity. We don’t want you to go about life NOT feeling what you experience. BUT, here’s why gratitude is so important:

 It actually HELPS you deal with the negative.

Here’s the thing: we go through life picking and choosing what we notice and what we take in. Once you start noticing what you want to be grateful for, you'll start noticing more and more of them. It’s like this upward spiral that you create for your brain. And guess what? When you are living that way, you have more capacity to deal with the negative things that DO hit you in life.

When you’re aligned with all the good that's happening in your life, when something bad happens, you're just starting at a point that's so much stronger and so much higher up than if you were constantly focused only on the negative. Listen to this episode for more on the science—and the balance between feeling what you feel but shifting towards gratitude anyway.

To celebrate the launch of the Women Rewriting the Rules podcast, we want to pamper you with the BEST holiday giveaway we could think of! Click here to join.

"Give yourself the grace and space to sit in the reality of life and to fully express it and not force yourself to be grateful or feel happy. But then, with time, look for ways that you can potentially turn some of those negatives into a positive."  ~  Sumi Krishnan

In This Episode:

- Don’t just feel your gratitude; express it

- We give negative feedback and reviews so easily but rarely speak about the good

- Gratitude takes intentional effort; it’s not just a feeling that happens

- How Oprah’s gratitude journal is backed by science

- Bad things do happen, and there is no denying that. Feel it. But there’s a way to find gratitude through it

- Find, Remind, Bind

- Habits we perform to practice gratitude

- When things get tough, use these tips to remind yourself about gratitude

Resources:

- The study on Gratitude Ashley mentioned -  Counting Blessings Versus Burdens: An Experimental Investigation of Gratitude and Subjective Well-Being in Daily Life

Connect with Sumi Krishnan:

- Instagram

Connect with Ashley Baxter:

- Website

Did you know that in 2020 the average consumer spent $850 on Christmas gifts? If you're earning the average women's salary of around $36000 per year, that's more than 2% of your annual salary on gifts for the Christmas season.

For Ashley, this brings up feelings of guilt and obligation around gifting during the Christmas season. And she's alongside Sumi to unpack these feelings and explore ways in which women can rewrite the gifting rules this Christmas. 

There's practical advice on what to give children, when to make something yourself, and how to become more savvy with your finances when it comes to gift-buying over the festive season. Ashley and Sumi agree to disagree about Secret Santa, proving that everyone has their own unique approach to gifting at Christmas. And with this episode to listen to, you'll be sure to make smarter gifting purchases going forward!

To celebrate the launch of the Women Rewriting the Rules podcast, we want to pamper you with the BEST holiday giveaway we could think of! Click here to join.

"I like Secret Santa (and/or White Elephant) if money is a concern for you. It's a great way to have fun with the experience..."  ~  Sumi Krishnan

In This Episode:

- Looking at what's behind the meaning of giving someone a gift 

- Becoming more savvy with your finances

- Making homemade cookies (with brown butter)

- Setting up an investment account for nieces and nephews

- Sending small gifts throughout the year to deepen your connection

- Not feeling obligated to give in to gift-giving pressure

- Exploring the adage 'Never show up to someone's house empty-handed'

- What about Secret Santa? Is it about the laughs, or is it about the gifts?

And so much more!

Resources:

The Sociology study Sumi mentions -  It Is My Turn Now: How and Why ‘Single’ Women Complain about Non-Reciprocal Gift-Giving

Connect with Sumi Krishnan:

- Instagram

Connect with Ashley Baxter:

- Website

Are you ready for increased intimacy with a loved one during the holidays? We're not just talking about physical intimacy. There's experiential intimacy, spiritual intimacy, intellectual intimacy, and many other ways that we can make ourselves vulnerable to the moment as we explore a greater depth with those we love (including ourselves).

Ashley and Sumi tenderly share their practical tips on cultivating deeper intimacy with your loved ones. This heart-opening episode offers advice on how to shift your language to create more space for intimacy and how to take ownership of your own feelings. It's about saying the thing you're not supposed to say, to let out your authentic truth.

This episode is also just the tonic single women out there will need to remind them that intimacy comes in so many beautiful forms. Please join us on this loving episode of Women Rewriting the Rules that is softly spoken yet deserving to be heard. 

To celebrate the launch of the Women Rewriting the Rules podcast, we want to pamper you with the BEST holiday giveaway we could think of! Click here to join.

"There's also intellectual intimacy, so what is the depth of conversation you can have with the people in your life on a variety of different topics? You have those conversations that go beyond the surface and into being vulnerable and sharing your innermost thoughts, and being open and honest in your views and how you look at things."  ~ Ashley Baxter

In This Episode:

- How are you connected to spirit?

- Getting outside and thinking about something greater than you

- How to cultivate deeper intimacy

- How to set up your environment so that it leads to greater intimacy

- Creative ways to gather people: specific people for a specific need

- Opening the door for your parent to tell you how they feel

- Turn your 'you’ statements into 'I’ statements

- Hold space for the discomfort that comes when you're trying to build intimacy

- Having an openness in your heart while dropping expectations

And so much more!

Resources:

- Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life: Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships (Nonviolent Communication Guides)

- 36 Questions for Increasing Closeness

- The Art of Gathering

Connect with Sumi Krishnan:

- Instagram

Connect with Ashley Baxter:

- Website

Are you taking the time to reflect on what is important to you during the holiday season? How much are you going along with family traditions that don't serve you anymore? And have you given any thought to creating new holiday traditions that empower you as a single woman?

Sumi and Ashley are together again, reflecting on their traditions growing up, and how they've created their own as they've evolved away from the pressure of family activities and endless travel that doesn't serve them anymore. 

This episode is an encouragement to give yourself permission to do less. It's the chance to take ownership of the connections you want to nurture as you let go of the people-pleasing and grab hold of new opportunities. Why not start a holiday tradition of your own? Why not invite friends over to your place instead of feeling obligated to spend time with other families and all their kids? Better still, why not take a vacation?

Sumi and Ashley tenderly reflect on what is needed to step up over the holidays in this delightful episode that will surely resonate with many single women of color.

To celebrate the launch of the Women Rewriting the Rules podcast, we want to pamper you with the BEST holiday giveaway we could think of! Click here to join.

"There's so much joy and value to be had in creating traditions." ~ Sumi Krishnan

In This Episode:

- Do your traditions make sense anymore? Are they built on the right foundations?

- Allowing yourself to go with the flow but still doing what makes sense for you

- Starting a 5Km Turkey Trot

- Recognizing internalized racism toward your own culture

- The value of leaning into the traditions from your cultural background

- Asking for friends and loved ones to come and see you over the holidays

- Having your own personal traditions around yourself (holiday meals and activities)

- Remembering that you're complete right now as you are

And so much more!

Resources:

- A Course in Miracles: Combined Volume: Foundation For Inner Peace

Connect with Sumi Krishnan:

- Instagram

Connect with Ashley Baxter:

- Website

Do you have a tendency to lean into the holiday stress? What if, instead, you leaned into the holiday glow-up? 

Women Rewriting the Rules are here today with their lists on how to live a better life during the holiday season, ensuring that you thrive during the stressful holiday season – and then go into the new year with new energy!

What are Sumi and Ashley's personal secrets for exquisite self-care? Please join them for this wonderful exchange of inspirational ideas and practical tips to Glow Up over the holidays. After all, if you're not relentless about living your best life, who else will be? Come on, ladies, it's time to glow up and show up!

To celebrate the launch of the Women Rewriting the Rules podcast, we want to pamper you with the BEST holiday giveaway we could think of! Click here to join.

"Taking the time to just be honest with myself (even when it's uncomfortable to do so) in how I'm feeling about how I'm spending my time... it gives me permission, in a way, to get rid of the things that don't feel good." – Ashley Baxter

In This Episode:

- A review of a Mount Sinai report on the effect of stress on women under 50 during the holidays

- How we make poor decisions while under stress (Brainwash, the book)

- The value of journaling for ten minutes in the morning

- Scheduling those doctor and dental appointments for the year ahead

- Ashley's 'HMU' method explained... Happy, Meh, Unhappy

- Do you feel as if the relationships with the top five people you've spent time with this year are reciprocal?

- Connecting with the people you love...

And so much more!

Resources:

- Mount Sinai South Nassau report - Women Under 50 Are Most Stressed Out as Holidays Approach, New ‘Truth in Medicine’ Poll Finds

- Brainwash (the book) - Brain Wash: Detox Your Mind for Clearer Thinking, Deeper Relationships, and Lasting Happiness by David and Austin Perlmutter

Connect with Sumi Krishnan:

- Instagram

Connect with Ashley Baxter:

- Website

Are you a single woman of color ready to level up and live an unapologetic life? If you’re looking for more community, more happiness, and more fulfillment with greater ease, then this is the show for you. 

Women Rewriting the Rules is here to help you take control of your story, figure out what’s holding you back, and set you up to fulfill your wildest (and most practical) dreams. 

Hosted by Sumi and Ashley, a Harvard grad and a USC professor with career successes and life experience galore, this inaugural episode offers you an inspiring insight into the hearts and minds of these two powerful women as they share their upbringings, their successes in life, and their very reasons for starting this show. 

Women Rewriting the Rules is tearing up the script of how women of color are meant to be portrayed, offering up new insights on how single women of color can navigate their way to financial freedom while also aging gracefully and living a life that isn’t just measured by marriage, children, and job success. Please join us on this exciting journey!

To celebrate the launch of the Women Rewriting the Rules podcast, we want to pamper you with the BEST holiday giveaway we could think of! Click here to join.

"So much of the content that's created for people of color is stereotypical to a certain extent. I know that as a black woman, a lot of the content that I see that would be relevant to me is around hair tutorials. That's great, but I also want to see people that look like me that are talking about other things, like finance, and love, and relationships, and careers." – Ashley Baxter

In This Episode:

- Redressing the balance of the representation of single women of color in the media

- How Sumi sped through childhood, attempting to live up to her parents’ expectations

- Sumi’s “success” of owning a government consulting firm 

- The search for self-discovery 

- The creative pursuit of launching a career as a recording artist

- Ashley’s story of growing up in a multi-generational household in East Texas

- How Ashley created her own job title as Digital PR Person 

- Ashley and Sumi set their intention for the show 

And so much more!

Connect with Sumi Krishnan:

- Instagram

Connect with Ashley Baxter:

- Website

What if you could step comfortably into your own unique identity, erase societal expectations that have conditioned you since birth, and love your life exactly as it is right now today while also confidently pursuing your audacious goals for the future?

You CAN. And Women Rewriting the Rules is going to show you how.

This is the podcast where we explore the rules and expectations that influence modern women. We help you feel confident in their independence, take control of your finances, set and achieve ambitious goals… and feel fabulous doing it.

Your hosts - women of color themselves - a USC Professor and a Harvard Grad have faced the same fears, challenges, and persevered as they’ve built ambitious lives and learned to love them exactly as they are

Ashley, born to a single mother in small town Texas, worked her way up the corporate ladder at Fortune 500 brands and eventually into academia as an adjunct professor and curriculum creator.. She’s your go-to when you need practical, insider tips & tricks. 

Sumi, the daughter of immigrants, was nudged down a traditional path by her parents, building her first multi-million dollar consulting firm by the age of 24. After more than a decade subconsciously living for the approval of her Dad, she gained the courage to write her own rules and is now  loving life as a recording artist in LA. She’s your go-to for straight-shooting advice and inspiration. 

Here's the thing - you're not living in a 90's rom-com where you'd be stuck playing the role of a funny sidekick. This is real life. You're the main character. Women Rewriting the Rules is going to help you take control, re-write your story, "mute" the haters, and start fulfilling your wildest (and totally realistic) dreams.

We’ll show you how to redefine your happiness and make big things happen, no matter who says it’s not possible. If you’re ready to get out of your head, stop worrying so much, and be fully present in the moment while strategically going after your goals–stick around. We’re your people.