Wonderfully Done: Wholesome Sex and Dating Advice

By wonderfullydoneSociety & Culture Health & Fitness Relationships Sexuality

Wonderfully Done: Wholesome Sex and Dating Advice episodes

March 23, 2021Unicorn Hunting: Am I the baddie? (Babysode)
Saddle up cuties - today we’re talking about Unicorns! 🦄
Babysodes break away from our usual format, and explore something that tickles our fancy - such as an interview, discussing a particular topic of interest, or playing games.
In this episode we discuss:
Unicorns - what are they?
Unicorn culture - the good, the bad & the ugly
Tips for being a good, respectful ‘unicorn hunter’
Tips for a safer, better unicorn experience
How to be them, and find them!
Content and tools mentioned in this episode:
Book Recommendation:
The Ethical Slut
English non-fiction book by Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy
This is often suggested as a first read for Polyamory
Take with a grain of salt
Dating apps through the lens of seeking threesomes:
Feeld app
Used to be called Thrinder
Kink and sexual encounter focused
You can connect your profile with your partners
People are pretty upfront with their specific sexual or kink related desires, which can make screening a little easier!
OkCupid
More common to see non-monogamy & queerness explicitly on profiles
Robust information on profiles
You can connect your profile with your partners
Tinder
Largest pool of selection, but less clear who is open to different lifestyles or their openness to it
Since a recent update, you can connect your profile with your partners
Connect with us!
Our website: www.wonderfullydone.show
Facebook: Wonderfully Done
Twitter: @donewonderfully

Listen on Spotify!

Support the show!
Leave us a review wherever you listen
Join our newsletter here
Ask an anonymous question here

Lots of love,
Lauren and Vix 💋
39 min
March 01, 2021Sex Toy Joy and Prioritising Pleasure with Nikki Darling
Hello, sweet angels! Today we’re here with none other than Nikki Darling, Australia's first gender-free sexual health and pleasure purveyors. We LOVE this online adult store, and jumped at the chance to interview the amazing owner - a fellow Lauren!

We’ve been blessed with a cheeky little discount code for our listeners - just enter WonderfullyDone at checkout for 10% off your first Nikki Darling order! 😍

Our fabulous conversation includes:
Insights into the daily life of running a sexual pleasure and health store
Inclusive practice and communication around sex toys
Trends in 2020 and predictions for 2021 (aka ‘the TikTok effect’)
The challenges of growing a sexual brand in an increasingly sex-negative world
Collecting and curating vintage and modern sex toys
Recommendations for sexy resources and learning
And so much more!

Mentioned in this episode:
Glyde Sheer Latex Dams
FC2 Internal Condoms

Carol Queen, Ph D
Louise Bourchier MPH
Tristan Taormino
Cyndi Darnell (The Atlas of Erotic Anatomy and Arousal)
Betty Dodson

Go forth and follow Nikki Darling!
Twitter
Instagram
Website

Connect with us!
Our website: www.wonderfullydone.show
Facebook: Wonderfully Done
Twitter: @donewonderfully

Listen on Spotify!

Support the show!
Leave us a review wherever you listen
Join our newsletter here
Ask an anonymous question here

Lots of love,
Lauren and Vix 💋
44 min
February 07, 2021Valentine's Day: Trash or Treasure?
The season of LOVE has begun as we march towards February 14th, Valentine's Day! With our deep fascination in all things dating and sex, we’d be remiss if we didn’t share some robust chats about this polarising holiday!

Babysodes break away from our usual format, and explore something specific that tickles our fancy - such as an interview, discussing a particular topic of interest, or playing games.

In this episode we discuss:
A brief history on the origins of Valentine's Day
Figuring out how to give good gifts to please your sweetie(s)
Navigating one person liking Valentine's while the other hates it
Why Valentine's Day shouldn't be the only day you’re extra romantic with partner(s)
Creative date ideas to break away from the classic ‘dinner and drinks’ combo
Our very own Valentine's Day plans!

We’re absolutely big sluts for Valentine’s and would LOVE to hear your thoughts about it! Please especially feel free to share your best Valentine’s OR your plans for this year here!

Ps. If you have a friend you think might enjoy our show, please share it with them - it would mean a lot to us!

Connect with us!
Our website: www.wonderfullydone.show
Facebook: Wonderfully Done
Twitter: @donewonderfully

Listen on Spotify!

Support the show!
Leave us a review wherever you listen
Join our newsletter here
Ask an anonymous question here

Lots of love,
Lauren and Vix 💋
1 hr 11 min
February 01, 2021Sex and Drag - A Conversation with Connie
Why hello there, lovely listeners! We’re here to bless your ears with the dulcet tones of Queen Olivia Lucretia-Bourgeois Connie St Redfern III (a.k.a Connie), one of New Zealand's 10 most Iconic Drag Queens!
Lauren sat down for an interview with this marvelous friend of the show, and discussed topics including:
Having sex in drag: yay or nay?
Generational differences in the culture and scene
Intersections between drag, gender and sexual identity
Inclusivity and experiences as a nonbinary ‘genderfuck’ bearded drag queen
Transferring knowledge and education before and after the internet
And so much more!
Content warning: This interview includes discussions of homophobia, and a mention of catcalling and assault.

Go forth and follow them!
Twitter - @queenoliviastr
Website - https://thequeenolivia.com/

Listen to more of Connie’s wonderful life adventures and subscribe to Small Stories in a Big Country.

Mentioned in this episode:
The Bombay Bombshell teaches drag dance classes at Pump Dance Studios
Rainbow Story Times - Celebrating diversity and rainbow families, with stories read in the library by Wellington’s Kings and Queens!

Connect with us!
Our website: www.wonderfullydone.show
Facebook: Wonderfully Done
Twitter: @donewonderfully

Listen on Spotify!

Support the show!
Leave us a review wherever you listen
Join our newsletter here ❤️
Ask an anonymous question here ❤️

Lots of love,
Lauren and Vix 💋
52 min
January 18, 2021Flirting, Libido and Sexting
Prepare for cheerful chaos and hard love - we’re back with another round of Seven Minutes in Heaven!

In these special episodes we answer at least four listener questions, but each question only gets seven minutes. A quickie, if you will. ;)

The topics we cover in this episode include:
Online sexting buds disappearing
Check-ins on flirt welcomeness
Long-term mismatched libido
Challenges with flirting on the spectrum

Creators mentioned in this episode:

Article Recommendation:
Sexual Currency
Article by Swell - from Dame Wellness Dot Come
What is Sexual Currency? The article describe it as:
‘ Anytime we hug, kiss, rub, squeeze, and nuzzle into a romantic partner, there is an erotic charge. This comes from the sexual relationship that exists between couples.. Sexual currency is a little different from physical affection. It is sexually charged touch that has erotic meaning.’
Loved this article it’s a great reminder that keeping a saucy fire going in our relationships is work, FUN WORK, that we can make lots of little investments into
Could be particularly helpful to anyone experiencing low libido in their relationship

Instagram Post Recommendation:
Topic: Relationships with different neurotypes
Stevie Writes shares neat things on kink, non-monogamy, Autism, sexuality and gender on their Instagram
Really wow concept to see specified and to really sit and consider how this affects our perceptions coming together in communications and our experience of our reality
The idea that our realities are all different - our perception is not reality - it is a version of it
Especially loved this:
‘'Getting comfortable with the ideas that difference can be met with curiosity and not condemnation is powerful work'

Instagram Recommendation:
@thefatsextherapist
Amazing trauma-informed sex therapist
Spoke on an Instagram Live about having a maz (masturbate) on top of your bedcovers while naked, rather than covering yourself up, staying clothed etc. By seeing ourselves in a slightly more embodied way, we can create micro-moments of body acceptance and appreciation. We challenge our dear listeners to give this a try!

Resource Recommendation:
YearCompass
A great reflection tool to help me let go of a hard year, and set me up for the new one
We are both filling this out this year (Lauren has done hers already ofc)

Connect with us!
Our Website: www.wonderfullydone.show
Facebook: Wonderfully Done
Twitter: @donewonderfully

Listen on Spotify!

Support the show!
Leave us a review wherever you listen
Join our newsletter here
Ask an anonymous question here

Lots of love,
Lauren and Vix
58 min
January 03, 2021Fat Body Admiration and Negotiating FWBs
Woah there, it’s the first Wonderfully Done episode of 2021!

The topics we cover in this episode includes:
Showing appreciation for fat bodies without being a creepy-creep
Discussing the ‘curvy wife guy’ internet moment
Shame around appearance preferences
Feelings around dating and sexuality as a fat woman
Expressing desire respectfully
How to approach a pal with a friends-with-benefits proposal (without being decimated from embarrassment!)

Creators mentioned in this episode:

Podcast Episode Recommendation:
Are we allowed to have sex in space? Feat. Dr Shawna Pandya, Yvette Gonzalez and Dr Alex Layendecker
TW: Sexual Assault approx after the 20 minute mark
Episode of The Future of Sex Podcast interviewing three experts in space travel and sexuality
Discussed lots of topics like:
None of the space agencies out there are sharing data or research on sex or masturbation!
What effects would space have on bodies, fluids and the mechanics of actually having sex?
Listen to this episode on Spotify here

Toy Recommendation:
Lelo Sona 2
Clit sucking toy, can also be used on nipples, or you know, EXPLORE ;)
Has a really neat range of sucking patterns
Step up from the Satisfyer Pro 2
Be warned, some of the patterns are pretty intense!

Show Recommendation:
The Untamed
Homoromantic Chinese fantasy drama on Netflix
Warring family clans, centering around two men who have a great obsession and fascination with each other
Excessively pretty men and gorgeous interiors!
Reminds Lauren that context sets the intensity - she’ll read really explicit fanfic, but then watching this where everything is really understated, just the smallest stuff is like GASP!
A relaxing, visually pleasing and slow watch
57 min
December 15, 2020Gift Giving, Long Distance Desires and Monster Fucking
A big hello to you, our dearest sex nerds and romance sweeties!

The topics we cover in this episode include:
Guilt around feeling the need to reciprocate the gift giving of a partner
Ideas for how to keep a long distance relationship feeling fresh and spicy in these pandemic times where travel is off the cards
What monsters we would like to fuck the very MOST

Creators mentioned in this episode:

Podcast Recommendation:
Why Won't You Date Me?
Hosted by comedy genius Nicole Byer
You may know Nicole from hosting ‘Nailed It’ on Netflix
Her podcast is an entertaining exploration of why she is single, love, life, and sex

Podcast Episode Recommendation:
‘Advice from a Dating Coach - Damona Hoffman by Why Won’t You Date Me?’
A juicy episode packed full of social analysis, vulnerability and concrete suggestions around dating in today’s world
Listen on Spotify

Connect with us!
Our website: www.wonderfullydone.show
Twitter: @donewonderfully
Listen on Spotify!

Support the show!
Leave us a review wherever you listen!
Join our newsletter here

Lots of love,
Lauren and Vix
1 hr 9 min
November 30, 2020Straight-Passing Bi Anxiety & Opening Up (Or Not)
Happy Season Two, sweet beans! By popular request, we’re launching the season with more chats about bisexuality and non-monogamy. Hooray!

The topics we cover in this episode:
Chatting through common fears for bisexual/pansexuals such as:
The possibility of ‘uncontrollable desire’ in a straight-passing relationship
Lack of experience anxiety
Internalised biphobia
The tricky dance of one partner wanting to be polyamorous, and the other partner feeling uncertain about opening up the relationship.

Creators mentioned in this episode:

Book Recommendation:
Pleasure Activism: The Politics of Feeling Good
Written by by Adrienne Maree Brown
A book exploring the power of pleasure in our lives, as a tool for self love and healing, social justice and so much more.

A few choice quotes:
“Your no makes the way for your yes. Boundaries create the container within which your yes is authentic. Being able to say no makes yes a choice.”
“Ultimately, love for the self is the deepest pleasure we deny ourselves. I work daily to be courageous enough to indulge in the purest pleasure of self-love.”
“We have been raised to fear the yes within ourselves, our deepest cravings. But, once recognized, those which do not enhance our future lose their power and can be altered. The fear of our desires keeps them suspect and indiscriminately powerful, for to suppress any truth is to give it strength beyond endurance. The fear that we cannot grow beyond whatever distortions we may find within ourselves keeps us docile and loyal and obedient, externally defined, and leads us to accept many facets of our oppression as women.”

Book Recommendation:
Opening Up - A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships
Written by Tristan Taormino
Explores the real-life benefits and challenges of many styles of open relationships. Includes tips on dealing with jealousy, negotiating boundaries, communication etc.

Book Recommendation:
The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities
Written by Dossie Easton and Janet Hardy
Despite the first edition hitting the world in 1997, this book remains a go-to for those wanting to learn more about the world of open relationships with ourselves and others

Lots of love,
Lauren and Vix
1 hr 4 min
October 26, 2020Seven Minutes in Heaven: Quickfire Questions
Wonderfully Done is a wholesome show about sex, communication and loving yourself!

Sweet listeners! This is the final episode of Season One of Wonderfully Done! Wow! Seriously, thank you for being with us and sharing in this space. We thought we’d do something fun and fresh before taking a little season break!

In this episode, we revisit a game from our highschool days: Seven Minutes in Heaven. In our version, we’re answering four of your questions, but each question only gets seven minutes! This episode is chaos in the funnest of ways, and we absolutely plan for a round two!

The topics we cover are:
How to be a total baddie, and the key to our personal confidence
How to open the door to chatting about sex and relationships with your pals, and encouraging sex positive culture in groups
How to recover after an unreturned affection from someone in the workplace
Defining intimacy in the context of our relationships - ie. physical, emotional, etc

Creators Mentioned in this episode:
Book Recommendation: ‘Sex and Social Media’
Written by Katrin Tiidenberg (Tallinn University, Estonia) and Emily van der Nagel (Monash University, Australia)
A juicy book exploring the intersection of sex & social media
Lauren and Vix were both participants in the research for this book
Buy your own copy of the book here: https://bit.ly/3gtMIHK
Book Recommendation: ‘Love 2.0’ by Barbara L. Fredrickson
It’s all about ‘Creating Happiness and Health in Moments of Connection’
Really good, accessible, not too long! The idea that Love is made in moments and is frequent but recurring. Not a destination but a habit etc
Website: https://www.positivityresonance.com/
Artist Recommendation: Exotic Cancer
A wicked awesome illustrator and stripper who is also based in Melbourne Australia! We adore her work!!!
Website: https://exoticcancer.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/exotic.cancer/

If you have a burning question or a topic you would like to hear our thoughts on, we would love to hear it!

Slide into our DMs with your questions @donewonderfully on Twitter, or slip us an anonymous message at curiouscat.qa/wonderfullydone!
56 min
October 19, 2020Season Two Question Callout!
Y’all seemed to enjoy Season One, so we’re making a Second Season, babes!

Frankly, we’ve been beyond delighted with the response to Wonderfully Done. When we set out to make this show, we had no idea we would receive such beautiful and heartfelt messages from our listeners.

For a brand spanking new season to be really fantastic, we need a bunch of new questions. This is where you come in!

In Season 2 we want to dig deeper into lots of juicy topics like:
Pegging
Crushes
Kink exploration
Communication challenges
Body acceptance

But you can ask us about ANYTHING!

Questions are always read anonymously
Short or long, anything goes!

If you’ve wanted to send a topic and have felt nervous, we encourage you to be brave! We would love nothing more than to chat through your curious thoughts, feelings and questions.

How to share a question?
Email us at [email protected]
DM @donewonderfully on Twitter
Curious Cat - https://curiouscat.qa/WonderfullyDone

BEWARE: WET FEELINGS AHEAD
We really want to take a moment to say how grateful we are for each and every one of you, whether you’ve listened to one episode, or every one we’ve made.
4 min

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Wonderfully Done: Wholesome Sex and Dating Advice

Wonderfully Done: Wholesome Sex and Dating Advice episodes

About Wonderfully Done: Wholesome Sex and Dating Advice