I don't need to wait anymore.

I used to believe that circumstances must be aligned and set in a certain way for me to be the kind of person I want to be.

"I can't relax until this is resolved"

"I can't be loving towards others if they are not towards me."

"I can't be the leader I want to be until I have more knowledge, better structure or more support."

That outside-in approach to change is so common it's like a virus.

I will BE the kind of leader I want to be, only when I HAVE the right set up and then I will finally be able to DO what I really want to do.

Or

I will work (DO) with clients who I really love when I HAVE them showing up in my business, so that I can finally BE happy and fulfilled in my business.

The problem with this approach is that I would always be waiting for things to change, depending on the right circumstances to happen. It felt like an endless "getting there" game.

One of the insights I had and was reminded of this last weekend when I spent 3 full days with 50 incredible leaders who are committed to transforming people's lives is that:

You can BE that person you wish today.

It's by being loving first in the face of criticism that others catch on to that and relax within themselves.

It's by seeing others as resourceful first that they can start recognising that in themselves.

It's by giving first that I create an opportunity to receive.

If you are in a job transition or thinking of circumstances going a certain way for you to BE who you want, I invite you to be that person now and let the people, places and circumstances catch on to the new you.

The search for freedom will never end.

Whether it is by letting go of your job, your relationships or your current way of living, that elusive feeling of freedom will always be a momentary thought, just like the experience of limitation.

True freedom, however, is not something we get. It's already here.

If you get tired of pursuing this fleeting feeling of freedom, let me know. Meanwhile, I recorded this podcast episode exploring exactly that for you.

Be blessed,

Felipe

Music by ⁠JujuGroove

What would it be like to actually experience the same work or relationships you've had for years, as if for the first time?

There's a whole new world that becomes available when we show up to a situation with no preconceived notions about what that will be like, when the "I know" gets put to the side and we engage with the world with a fresh new set of eyes.

Let's explore that together.

Be blessed,

Felipe

I was recently having a really great conversation with a former client about taking action only when they feel good beforehand.

This is actually a great recipe for inaction.

If I needed to make sure I'd feel good before doing something, I'd never have important conversations with people, I'd rarely go to the gym and I'd likely play video games and watch Netflix all day - although I found even that doesn't feel good after a while.

When I am not should-ing myself about doing something, when I am not shaming myself for not taking action and when I am not believing I always need to feel good...action is a wonderful experiment.

Meaning, filled with wonder.

There's a curiosity that arises when I come to terms with the fact that my belief of how I will feel in the future is always a made-up interpretation and never what will actually happen.

That there's a world of thoughts and feelings and then there's a world of experimentation.

None of which needs to rely on one another.

And when I don't feel good and I choose to not take action, that's ok as well. As soon as I see this distinction more clearly, I am back into the wonder of action-taking.

Every single time when someone whom I am speaking to sees this distinction in a deeper way for themselves, they have a "Holy Sh*t" moment because most of what was getting in the way of action simply falls away.

If you'd like to explore this for you, send me a PM.

Much love,

Felipe

Being on the fence is one of the most familiar places to be for many people.

I notice my tendency as well to set up a cosy home for myself up there and watch all my reasonings and justifications on both sides of that fence while I drink a warm cup of tea on top of it.

While I am on the fence, my ability to impact life is substantially diminished.

I am analysing my reasons, justifications, rationalisations, excuses and opinions. I am not going for anything.

And there's nothing wrong with that. It's just very useful to see that our ability to impact life comes through choice and action, rather than analysing what actions to take.

Whether it is about picking a career from hundreds of options available or starting/not starting a business or even taking out the trash or not, there are two modes that we can operate from:

Deciding or Choosing.

With one I am on the fence, with another, I jumped down.

Again, nothing right or wrong, better or worse here. But a very important thing to be aware of if your commitment is to impact your life and play full out.

Much love,

Felipe

- Wanting to do a new project AND not having enough time for more.

- Wanting to relax/slow down AND get more done.

- Failing over and over again AND being happy.

- Doing something hard AND being kind to yourself.

There's a quote I once heard years ago that ever since stuck with me:

"The most successful people are the ones who are able to hold multiple opposing truths at the same time"

Recently I've been more and more inclined to live in the sweet spot between contradictions and asking myself "What if it's possible to have both?"

I currently don't have space for new clients in my 1-1 practice and yet someone just signed up for a package in a way that works perfectly with my calendar.

I've been having more and more on my plate and yet I am more at ease than ever.

I recognised a belief in me that "I am not a reader" and yet I am reading/listening to more books than years ago.

In my opinion, one of the characteristics of great leaders is this ability to hold multiple perspectives at the same time, even seemingly opposing ones, and give themselves mental space to reflect on what else is possible.

But that's not normal. What is normal is to create rigid rules on how things should be and that only the naive would dream of something that doesn't seem possible...yet, all inventions and great ideas are created in the unknown space of possibility.

Right now there might be things you want in your life that don't seem possible, maybe for lack of time, money or because you don't know how or because you think you might not be capable of handling the consequences of creating that.

On one hand, we can continue to do "business as usual" and wait for circumstances to perfectly align in order to move forward with what we want to create.

On the other hand, we can give ourselves permission to reflect and ask ourselves: "Given this obstacle, what would still be possible?"

I've been really enjoying living more into this question rather than into the "yeah, but" excuses my mind creates.

Much love,

Felipe

I used to believe the harder I thought about a subject I thought I needed to fix, the faster I would get a good solution.

This can't be further from the truth.

In my experience, insights, great ideas and solutions only come when the mind is spacious enough. Mental busyness hinders any possibility we have for fresh new perspectives.

I especially believed I needed to think a lot to solve relationship problems and "get to the bottom of things", but that fast-paced thinking only exacerbated the problem and had me feeling stuck.

Curiosity, reflective thinking and contemplation are the qualities of a fertile mental soil for fresh new ideas and insights.

And as a possibility, the situations in your life which you believe you need to think hard to deal with will feel a lot easier to navigate in a slowed pace of mind. Test it out!

Much love,

Felipe

The way people usually approach for a better work life balance is by taking an honest look at where they are putting their time and attention throughout the day and then prioritising the things they've been putting to the side. That can be useful. It's very logical and intellectual and what usually comes out of it is to compartmentalise our lives and change our environment to make sure there's enough time for everything. It's a good starting point, but we can go deeper...

It's possible to get to the point where we are able to recreate work and any aspect of our lives anew at any moment. Work and play can become one in the same, so this quote by James A. Michener can be an embodied expression of ourselves:

"The master in the art of living makes little distinction between his work and his play, his labor and his leisure, his mind and his body, his information and his recreation, his love and his religion. He hardly knows which is which. He simply pursues his vision of excellence at whatever he does, leaving others to decide whether he is working or playing. To him he's always doing both."

Much love, Felipe

Music by ⁠⁠JujuGroove

Someone tells you “I’ll meet you at 17h” and they show up 15 minutes later without telling you they were going to be late beforehand. Would you continue to rely on their word in the future?

Probably not so much. And eventually, if they continue to be out of integrity with their word, the relationship would start to break apart because you’d see that their promises have no validity.

Having integrity with our word simply makes things work effectively.

It doesn’t have to be a moral thing or a virtue or something filled with judgments, guilt, shame and blame. Integrity is simply something that is whole, complete and in perfect condition to work.

And if I have integrity with my word, I see my word and my actions as one undivided unit - as a power to create anything into being. And when I can’t keep my promises, I can still honour my word by telling myself or someone else about it and recreating a new promise.

Justifications, explanations, guilt or shame don’t need to be involved.

Keeping our word has been shown to increase performance and morale at work and in life. Not being aware of this power of creating through language leaves a lot of potential on the table.

In this episode, we'll explore this topic of integrity in a deeper way and look at the importance of it for leadership.

Much love, Felipe

Music by ⁠JujuGroove

It's very easy to think of goals as a place to get to and head down to the hustle of doing whatever it takes to get there. But, for what? What am I trying to "get" or experience when I get "there"?

In this episode, I am slowing down the pace to help us take a closer look at the whole reason why we would strive for anything in the first place and look at goals as a place to come from within ourselves. The result of that is we get to naturally enjoy the process along the way and play full out, which in turn gives us a greater chance to achieve what we want because we are not so afraid of what might happen if we don't get it.

As always, if you have any questions, comments, positive or negative criticisms, please send your message to [email protected]. I'd be happy to continue the conversation with you.

Much love, Felipe