Join Ashlee and Jennifer in a conversation about experiences and support for kids of first responders. They take their professional knowledge to help with the hardest job, being a parent with the added pressures of a high stress job.

It's a message of support with tips on how to meet the needs of your family while still wearing the badge. This experience coming from 2 mental health professionals that were raised by first responders, so we get it. And we hope to create a community for others that do too.

Welcome to when the call hits home. We're so excited to have you here and excited for you to get to know us.

I think it's time for us to introduce ourselves. Right? Like, this is our first episode, and we're really getting into it. So my name is Ashlee Gethner. I'm Jennifer Woosley. And, honestly, we just are here to tell you a little bit about what we do and how this all came about. So first, I am, I guess, doctor Ashlee Gethner, but you won't really hear me say that again because I'm not one to say it often. But I am a doctor of social work and a licensed clinical social worker. I own my own private practice in Kenosha, Wisconsin, and I specialize in working with first responders.

And for me, my passion for first responders came about because I grew up in a first responder's family. So, my dad did 29 years as a police officer. And, honestly, I didn't realize how different my life was. And, Jennifer, I don't know. I think you're you're gonna attest to this a little bit.

We'll definitely talk about it.

But I didn't realize how different my life was growing up in a first responders family until I was put in the position as I got older to connect with others such as Jennifer and learn about it.

Yes. And I actually also work in the mental health field. I'm a licensed professional clinical counselor. I've been practicing for 16 years, and I've worked in many settings from community mental health to an army base where they say they keep all the gold. I feel very, very fortunate that I love and enjoy my work. In some of my different experiences and working different places, I got the opportunity to work as a military family life counselor offering support to service members that serve. And then, Ashlee, do you wanna just talk about a little bit more about how we met and where this came about, especially since you did so much of your research and doctorate about, serving first responders?

Yes. It was actually I mean, it's a fun story. Right? It's here. It really launched us into all this. So I had started my dissertation, and I was in my doctorate program. And I decided that it was time to write this dissertation.

I don't know how you

did it. Definition of insanity. And, I went down. I got connected to a seminar, and I went down to Observe in which I actually ran into you. And over time, I got invited back. Right? So it's a a 3 day seminar in which we work with first responders, police, and dispatch, but it's mental health oriented. And so there's therapists there. And I was able to observe and then lucky enough to join the team.

And while I was down there, I met Jennifer and finally started to connect when she told me that her dad was a police officer too. And I think I don't know. What do

you think? I definitely think that was such a turning point. So, obviously, being a mental health provider, you're wearing your own kinda hat with it, and it comes with knowledge and information, and, you better be a really good listener. That's really important. I had gone to the seminar a little bit before Ashlee and had a time to kinda serve. And, you know, I was talking to Ashlee about what a lightning bolt moment that was for me. Again, I've been serving different populations. I'd worked at a domestic violence shelter. I'd worked with children in care.

And I kinda just, a fluke, got invited to the seminar, and I remember just feeling like, oh my goodness. This is where I'm supposed to be Yeah. In terms of just the ability to serve those that serve. And you'll probably hear me say that a lot, but I do think it's incredible for people that serve their community, to save people's lives. Like, they need people to back them up and serve them. And so I think in that and feeling such a calling was incredible, and Ashlee and I got to just kinda chat and, I guess, have several meals together over those 3 days.

Yeah.

And talking about a little bit what our experiences was like because I think we are the only mental health providers at this specific seminar that are, children of first responders. Obviously, their spouses and other people that have, actually, their own personal experiences as EMT and police officers that evolve into counseling and social workers. But, yeah, we just really talked about and connected over what it meant to grow up in that home and know I don't know, again, what your experience was. I know for me, the value system of growing up, it was about service to others.

Yeah.

There might be some generational stuff there, you know, in terms of I had other grandparents that were teachers and all this kinda and military members in my family. So it was always about service, and then, obviously, having a police officer's dad was about service to your community and kinda being a part of something bigger, which I think is a wonderful thing.

Yeah. And it's so funny because I remember the very first PCIS I went to. I totally was like, oh my gosh. You went and presented. And I was like, this woman is incredible. Like, she knows exactly what she's talking about. Not only that, but she's doing my dream job. Like, she's here.

She's serving. She's, you know, helping these first responders, and that's all I wanted to do. And it's funny how you said, like, going there kind of ignited your career into being like, yes. I know I want it at some capacity also helped first responders. And for me, with writing my dissertation and with being invited there, now being a part of it, it was something that I felt like was that turning point in my career where I was like, there's nothing else, like, I want to do. Like, I have to help first responders.

Well, I think it's funny that I blew your mind when, again, you told us all about you being a doctor. So you're actually the brains

of Okay.

You're the brains of the operation. But I do I mean, are you comfortable to talk a little bit, I guess, in detail about your doctor in terms of what your research is about and really, I guess, talk a little bit more about your expertise and why you know, what we wanna bring to people that listen to when the call hits home.

Sure. I mean so I guess I would love to reference that when I say the title of my dissertation, I think it puts people off a little bit. And I never want someone to like, this has nothing to do political at all. That is not my purpose of my dissertation. That was not my driving force, but my dissertation was on the civil unrest and how it impacted active law enforcement officers. And the real reason why I picked that was because I was in my master's program when a bigger event did unfold and kind of quickly realized right then and there that, like, being a child of a first responder is not always a very positive thing in this world.

Right.

And I kinda I'm a be honest, a a little vulnerable episode 1, so y'all better protect me here. I kinda felt really small. Like, oh my god. They're all talking about my dad. Like, you're talking really bad about my dad, and and it scared it scared me, but then it was a big motivator for me to be like, well, let me figure out more. Mhmm. And so I set out on this path to just really hear their stories and how going through civil unrest events impacted not just them, but their families as well. Mhmm.

And, you know, being able to explore that opportunity with these officers and get these firsthand narratives from them about what it was like for them and their families was truly life changing. And I think for me, that's when I was like, oh my gosh. Like, we do talk a lot about officers, and we do talk a lot about their spouses, which is a 100% needed. But most of them were giving me details about their children and how bad they were hurting. Yeah. And I was like, I felt that too. Mhmm. Right? Like, your kid felt that.

I remember feeling that.

Right.

I remember that. And, actually, it was while we were working together, we were sitting in the back talking during a break, and you had a gosh. I I'm gonna be honest here. I think it was it was something more along the lines of something our fathers would say or how we would kinda get disciplined in which all of a sudden this light bulb went off in my head, and I looked at you and I remember going, oh my gosh. You went through that too? Like, I didn't think anybody else understood what it was like Right. To go through that, and it was because you were a child of a first responder as well. Right? So, like, everything that I have worked for in my doctorates degree and then just kind of landed in my lap was like, we don't get talked about enough in a career that

We don't. I'm not I will say what a first responder kid response of being in something where you're uncomfortable and and feel small, which I hate that that was your experience. But let me take that and let me empower myself and let me do something about that. I do feel like a lot of the first responder that I have the honor of working with or have experienced just in general in this world are all about looking for problem solving, looking for solutions, which I think is an incredible thing. But I think that acknowledgment about what our roles are in a family with a parent with a really high stress job Yeah. With a lot of shift work, unfortunately, having to kinda see people on their worst bad days, the impact that that has on a family, but, specifically, we're really here to talk about kids. And as Ashlee and I have grown and talked about, you know, gosh, this dream project, Really thinking about to not just for first responders who are parents right now and ways to coach and be there and and reflect on things and using our expertise as mental health professionals, but also wanting to reach out and create a community. And, Ashlee, you are so great about this to say, well, we want first responder kids that are over 18 too.

Like, any place where it's just like you can be seen and supported and knowing that your family is great. All families have their stuff. But, hey, maybe there's some skills, some things that we can learn more about that can be really helpful.

Yeah. Absolutely. And I I think that our listeners, right, like, our audience is going to be engaged because we want guest speakers on here, and we want, like, first responders of all sorts, firefighter children, ZMTs, everybody, like, to come forward and and join us in this journey. Right. And we can learn from each other and talk to each other and connect on what what it was like similar wise, but then also talk about maybe some of those differences that we saw too. Because I know for us, right, like, I can connect with you and say, hey. Oh my gosh. That was so true.

But when I talk to a firefighter's child, right, I'm like, oh, that's different. That's a little bit of a different world.

Yeah. How so hard is it not seeing your your parent for 48 hours? And, you know, when you're little, you don't know what a minute is. So how do you determine time and a parent's home, a parent's gone, a parent's home, a parent's gone, or, you know, dispatching as well. I think I've shared this in the class that I taught. I don't know if I shared it in a while, but I'll never forget, you know, being in my dad's car and hearing the dispatcher's voices on the radio, and they were just kind of, like, a part of us. You know? Like, they were such familiar voices, and and I know we've talked about with dispatchers we worked in, how they feel really kinda unseen and not included at times. CF. So all those things we wanna incorporate and feel and really, most importantly, that you're heard, supported, and understood here as you listen to us kinda talk about these things.

Yeah. Absolutely. Well, this is kinda how we all start like, we started this huge project. Right? Like, we both realized, man, we have a lot in common, but yet different maybe from general population in terms of kids and what you know, how they grow. And then we went on this little journey together of, like, but how do we how do we focus in on this then?

We definitely see a need. Like, well, how do we capture that need? How do we help and support that need? I didn't interrupt.

Oh, well, no. I'm glad you did because I honestly was like, I'm not sure how. And so I remember you were like, hey. You listen to podcasts. Like, we listen to podcasts. What about this journey of starting 1? And and so you know what? Why don't I hand this mic to you? Because I'm telling you. The podcast here is expert. Oh, the expert on podcast.

So tell tell him why. Tell him why we decided to do the podcast.

I definitely am on all the podcasts that I can enjoy. And listen. There's lots out there. So we are really excited that you're listening to ours for sure. But I definitely believe in the power of podcasts. I also think they are so much more conducive to our lives and lifestyle