Living Two Lives — Hollywood Fame & Hidden Cult Control | Part 1

“You can’t be human here.”

In Part 1 of this raw and revelatory conversation, One Tree Hill star Bethany Joy Lenz opens up about the decade she spent inside a high-control religious group — all while filming a hit TV show and hiding a double life.

We talk about:
- The slow creep of coercive control masked as faith
- The emotional and spiritual suppression that comes with people-pleasing
- The inner split of being both artist and captive
- How spiritual language is used to dominate
- What it feels like to finally scream, “Fck God, Fck Jesus, Fck everything”* — and why that moment was sacred

This isn’t just an interview. It’s a conversation between two people who’ve lived inside systems that punished authenticity and praised obedience. What emerged is a vulnerable, unfiltered exchange about waking up, falling apart, and coming home to yourself.

👉 Part 2 drops next week, where we go even deeper into Joy’s escape, motherhood, financial exploitation, and her journey to rebuild trust and voice.

📚 Buy the Book
📖 Dinner for Vampires: Life on a Cult TV Show (While Also in an Actual Cult!) by Bethany Joy Lenz

Follow Bethany Joy Lenz →https://www.instagram.com/msbethanyjoylenz/

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The views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything.

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This episode contains candid discussion about narcissistic abuse, psychopathy, high-control systems, workplace trauma, and cult dynamics. Please listen with care.

What if the charming, high-achieving leader at your company—or in your government—isn’t just a narcissist… but a full-blown corporate psychopath? In this revealing episode, I sit down with Dr. Cynthia Mathieu, a psychologist and professor who studies “dark leadership”—the presence of psychopathic traits in organizational power structures.

Together, we dive into:

• How to spot a psychopath in the boardroom
• Why some HR departments miss the real danger
• The emotional cost for those caught in toxic systems
• What happens when we glamorize these traits in media
• And yes—what it was like to unknowingly study psychopathy… under a cult leader

If you’ve ever questioned your gut about a leader’s intentions or felt gaslit in a workplace, this conversation will help name what others try to deny.

Dr. Mathieu is the author of Dark Personalities in the Workplace → [Link to book]

More about her work: https://cynthiamathieu.com/en/

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The views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything.

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Guest: Jacob Skidmore (@TheNamelessNarcissist)

Jacob Skidmore has been diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder. He’s one of the very few who talks about it—openly, unfiltered, and without a script.

In this raw and revealing conversation, we dive into the unsettling inner world of NPD: the chronic emptiness, the relentless need for admiration, the calculated personas, and the aching desire to be understood?

This is not a redemption arc. It’s a glimpse into a mind built to perform… and a human being trying to make sense of it.

⚠️ Content Warnings

This episode contains raw discussion of:

• Narcissistic personality disorder and manipulation
• Emotional detachment and masking
• Childhood trauma and psychological abuse
• Vindictiveness and self-loathing

If you’re a survivor of narcissistic abuse, please listen with care.

Support the show

The views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything.

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicente
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In this episode, Mark Vicente unpacks the concept of self-sealing systems — those airtight ideological loops used in cults, extreme religious groups, and even political tribes to block out dissent and lock members deeper into belief. Drawing from his own lived experience in NXIVM (aka ESP), Mark explains how these systems use circular logic, linguistic reframing, and fear-based conditioning to keep followers compliant and questioning outsiders.

He explores:

• The emotional traps of “being at cause”
• The psychological architecture of films like The Village
• How certain keywords trigger shame, dismissal, or moral superiority
• The chilling trend of algorithmic censorship around trauma-related crimes
• Why courage means examining your own side — not just pointing fingers at “them”

This one might ruffle some feathers. But if no one’s pissed off… is he even doing his job?

Support the show

The views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything.

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicente
Website: www.markvicente.com
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In this expletive laden and unfiltered solo episode, Mark Vicente dives deep into the subtle, insidious ways abusive individuals and systems exploit our longing to grow, reflect, and “be better.” He explores the psychological unraveling that happens when introspection is hijacked to suppress personal agency.

Drawing from his lived experience in NXIVM, Mark unpacks how coercive groups often encourage relentless self-examination not to empower, but to disable. The more you question yourself, the less you question them. He shares how terms like “narcissism on a spectrum” and “interdependence” are weaponized to gaslight dissent and justify control—especially over sensitive, self-aware individuals.

The episode also takes aim at the modern digital landscape, where platforms like YouTube reward hysteria, obedience, and superficiality while shadowbanning nuanced, divergent voices. Mark wrestles with a painful dilemma: should he tailor his messaging to appease the algorithm gods—or remain steadfastly authentic and risk invisibility?

This is a reflection on the price of truth, the cost of being “too sensitive,” and the mind games that keep good people doubting themselves while abusers thrive.

Themes Explored:

 • Weaponized introspection & the psychology of disempowerment
 • Narcissistic abuse vs. healthy self-assertion
 • False narratives around “everyone’s a narcissist”
 • Coercive control in high-control groups
 • The trap of endless personal responsibility
 • Digital censorship, shadow-banning & algorithmic obedience
 • The tension between authenticity and visibility in online spaces

Support the show

The views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything.

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicente
Website: www.markvicente.com
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What happens when truth becomes your only option for survival?

In this unfiltered, emotionally honest conversation, filmmaker and whistleblower Mark Vicente sits down with Josh Connolly—a resilience coach and breathwork facilitator who’s spent over a decade helping people reconnect with their inner truth after trauma. Josh talks about growing up in a dysfunctional home, breaking out of addictive roles, and how society at large mirrors the same toxic family dynamics we try to escape.

They also dig into:
 • How addiction isn’t just about substances, but about escaping ourselves
 • The lie of spiritual bypassing and “you chose this” narratives
 • Why the ones telling the truth are often scapegoated
 • Building community without falling into cult dynamics
 • Rage, sadness, inner child work, and the daily choice to stay alive

If you’ve ever questioned your reality—or been told you’re “too sensitive”—this one’s for you.

📚 Josh’s Book:
It’s Them, Not You – How to Break Free from Toxic Parents and Reclaim Your Story
Available now: https://www.joshconnolly.co.uk

🌀 Connect with Josh:
Instagram: @joshconnolly_
Website: https://www.joshconnolly.co.uk

Support the show

The views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything.

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicente
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In this powerful and revealing episode, filmmaker Mark Vicente sits down with Dr. Karen Mitchell, founder of the Kalmor Institute and the author of one of the most groundbreaking PhD theses ever written on dark personalities.

https://kalmor.com.au/
https://x.com/karenmitchell__

Karen shares the results of decades of research and direct experience, unveiling a chilling but deeply important truth: narcissists, psychopaths, Machiavellians, cult leaders, toxic executives, and coercive controllers may all be subsets of one single high-level predator—what she calls the Persistent Predatory Personality (PPP).

Together, Mark and Karen explore:
- How these individuals operate in corporate, medical, religious, and legal systems
- Why many are high-functioning, charming, and completely hidden
- How academia and the justice system often enable or overlook this abuse
- Why “the mask” of empathy is often just a calculated act
- The emotional, mental, and reputational devastation experienced by targets
- Red flags to look out for—and why reporting often makes things worse before it gets better
- The tragic impact on children, families, and even democracy

This is not just a conversation about abuse. It’s a call to wake up to the patterns, the tactics, and the systems that allow this behavior to thrive. If you’ve ever dealt with narcissistic abuse, manipulation, or invisible harm—this episode is essential.

Key Topics:
- The truth behind the “Dark Triad” and the “Dark Tetrad”
- Why most research has been looking in the wrong place
- The danger of self-reporting studies when studying liars
- Coercive control: from domestic violence to cult dynamics
- Why dark personalities are attracted to power, law, medicine, and even charity work
- The difference between true predators and trauma survivors who mimic similar behaviors
- Why our society is desperately under-equipped to deal with these people

Support the show

The views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything.

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicente
Website: www.markvicente.com
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In this solo episode, filmmaker and truth-seeker Mark Vicente shares what’s been stirring in his mind—from the deeply personal to the culturally explosive.

He starts with an exploration of dignity—what it is, why it matters, and how it’s the missing ingredient in many conversations about boundaries and self-respect. Through stories and personal insight, he dives into the internal work required to reclaim one’s worth, especially after experiences of coercive control, narcissistic abuse, or cult entanglement.

Mark also challenges the idea that we can simply "move on" from trauma. Drawing from his conversations with cult survivors, he shares why unprocessed pain never truly stays buried—and how it inevitably seeps into our relationships, our bodies, and our choices if left unhealed.

Then things take a turn: he unpacks recent archaeological discoveries beneath the Pyramid of Khafre using SAR (Synthetic Aperture Radar) scans—findings that seem to confirm the theories long ridiculed as "conspiracies." He calls out the mainstream resistance to new truths, especially when they disrupt long-held narratives.

This leads into a passionate reflection on shadowbanning, censorship, and algorithmic suppression—including what appears to be a deliberate silencing of a previous podcast episode featuring a Black female guest whose voice, ironically, challenges the very systems that claim to protect marginalized voices.

Lastly, Mark questions what we even mean when we say “the world.” Is it the real world—or the carefully filtered version we’ve been fed through screens, algorithms, and corporate media?

This episode is messy, real, and deeply human. It’s not about having answers—it’s about asking better questions.

If you’ve ever felt like the world’s gone mad, this one’s for you.

Support the show

The views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything.

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicente
Website: www.markvicente.com
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7
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In this deeply insightful and unfiltered conversation, I speak with return guest Africa Brooke. Africa is a writer, speaker, and thought leader known for her work on self-censorship, self-sabotage, and personal transformation. The discussion explores the tension between speaking one’s truth and navigating societal pressures, tribalism, and ideological conformity. Africa and I challenge listeners to reflect on their beliefs, fears, and the cost of authenticity in today’s world. This episode is a must-listen for anyone grappling with the tension between personal expression and societal expectations. If you've ever felt stifled, censored, or conflicted about speaking your truth, this conversation will give you the tools and reflections to navigate it with greater confidence.

Previous WTF podcast episode with Africa: Brave Expression in the Age of Intolerance

My appearance on Africa's podcast "Beyond the Self" Releasing Cult Like thinking & Rigid Identities w/ Mark Vicente

https://africabrooke.com/

Africa's Book: The Third Perspective: Brave Expression in The Age of Intolerance

An open letter: why I'm leaving the cult of wokeness by Africa Brooke

Key Topics Discussed

• The Power & Cost of Speaking Out
  • Mark shares his journey as a whistleblower and observer of cult-like behaviors across societal structures.
  • Africa discusses self-censorship and how people suppress their true thoughts out of fear of social rejection.
• Navigating Identity & Ideological Tribes
  • Why people are pressured to "pick a side" and the dangers of binary thinking.
  • Africa’s perspective on her book The Third Perspective: Brave Expression in the Age of Intolerance and the importance of embracing nuance.
• Personal Freedom vs. Social Acceptance
  • Mark explores his past struggles with needing external validation for his beliefs.
  • How childhood experiences shape our willingness to express ourselves fully.
• The Role of Specificity in Truth-Telling
  • The challenge of being specific in criticism without triggering ideological resistance.
  • Discussing controversial figures and how society justifies actions based on perceived "good vs. evil" narratives.
• Tribalism & Cognitive Dissonance
  • Why humans instinctively form groups and resist opposing viewpoints.
  • How past societal and political manipulations have exploited this human tendency.

Support the show

The views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything.

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicente
Website: www.markvicente.com
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In this eye-opening episode of WTF is on My Mind?!, I sit down with Coach Liliya Labonte, a specialist in narcissistic abuse and healing, to uncover a rarely discussed topic: the female narcissist. Unlike their male counterparts, female narcissists operate in uniquely insidious ways, leaving many victims questioning their reality.

Together, we explore:
✔️ The key differences between male and female narcissists
✔️ The subtle (and not-so-subtle) signs to watch for
✔️ How to protect yourself and begin the healing process

🚨 Warning: This conversation delves into emotional abuse and manipulation. Proceed with care.

https://www.liliyalabonte.com/
https://www.youtube.com/@UChO_r7A2cXqZ8A3NmIp7wyA
https://www.instagram.com/coachliliya/?hl=en
https://www.tiktok.com/@coachliliya?lang=en

Support the show

The views and opinions expressed on WTF is on my Mind?! do not necessarily reflect the official policy or position of the podcast or Mark Vicente. Any content provided by guests are of their opinion and are not intended to malign any religion, group, club, organization, business individual, anyone or anything.

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/MarkVicente
Website: www.markvicente.com
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@markvicente7
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