X & Y On The Fly - Dating Podcast | Love | Sex | Relationships

Who knew a funny video featuring two cockatoos would lead to a full-on discussion of one of the most devastating--and common--ways we do mess up our chances in dating and relationships? I'm talking, of course, about trying too hard. Do men, especially so-called 'nice guys', do this more than women? If so, why is that? Can it really be as simple as because men do EVERYTHING to impress chicks? But what are the ways that women tend to try too hard? Why do people think this works to attract people, when the weird psychological effect is the exact opposite? Instead of pushing people away, how can we PULL them in magnetically? And what's the difference between needy approval seeking as opposed to simply being too damn perky, upbeat, enthusiastic or optimistic? Why do people persist in trying too hard, even when they already realize they're 'pushing it uphill' and their efforts are doomed to failure? And what's up with men's tendency to try logicking women into liking us? Women often say they 'want a man to pursue them', but how is that different than chasing in desperation? Of course, no discussion such as this would be complete without straight talk on when to actually give up. Catch show notes, free downloads and a chance to talk to us free for 25-minutes about turning your life around for the better...all when you visit https://scotandemily.com/podcast

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The content in this show is NEVER generated by AI. We discovered it can't handle a joke a long time ago. Meanwhile, we'll keep the practical, actionable ideas coming as well as the entertaining part...all for free. If you love what you hear, please rate the show on the service you subscribed to it on (takes one second) and leave us a review. As we say here in Texas, we appreciate you!

It's the foundation of every good solid relationship. With it, you and your significant other are set for years of blissful happiness together. Without it, you're likely doomed to failure. We're talking about trust, of course. Emily and I have enjoyed a trusting relationship with each other for nearly sixteen years now, and she finally sat down with me for a deep dive into all aspects of what that trust looks like. What causes men and women to lack (or lose) trust for each other? How do established mindsets wreak destruction on a nascent relationship before it even has a chance? Should two people trust each other at the beginning blindly, or is that earned over time? What is a reasonable amount of suspicion versus simply being paranoid? What do you do when lack of trust becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy? And how can we shake that nagging feeling of unwillingness to trust again after getting hurt over and over...isn't that kind of like not trusting oneself to begin with? And what about the strain that long-distance relationships put on trust? Do pre-nuptial agreements automatically betray lack of trust right from the beginning? How much does communication really have to do with all of this? Why does Emily enthusiastically support my in-field outings with you guys to practice meeting women? And for the big finale, we cover the three cornerstones of a good, solid trusting relationship that's built to last. So what about you? Are you in a relationship where trust is lacking, and want to either build it up or get it back? Would you like to get into a healthy relationship but find it hard to trust again? Let's get on the phone together and talk about it. Get on our calendar at https://www.scotandemily.com/podcast

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We'll keep the solid, actionable content coming...all for free. If you love what you hear, please give us a 'thumbs up' by rating the show (takes one second) and leaving us a review. As they say here in Texas, we appreciate you!

In 1968, Tammy Wynette released probably her most famous single, which caused immediate outrage from the Women's Movement. But Wynette countered by saying 'stand by your man' simply meant accepting one's husband despite his faults. But still, by today's standards the song might evoke even more vitriolic outrage. Yet, a recent Facebook post brought up how men are always taught how to treat a woman, but teaching women how to treat a man would be anachronistic at best, sexist or even patriarchal oppression at worst. So what's up with that? Are women just teaching their daughters how to stay away from men? Do the so-called 'red pill' guys and #MGTOW have a point when they decry the double standard? Well, Emily and I throw all of this on the table, along with the sandwich she just made me (kidding). But there's a lot to talk about here. I mean, obviously both women AND men should stand by each other in a relationship, right? But not everyone deserves what they want here. When does loyalty turn into being a doormat? And what happens when men don't WANT to be 'treated', and just want to be left alone to do stuff themselves? Can't people in relationships just do right by each other, and like it? I mean, if we don't stand together we'll inevitably grow apart...right? Go to https://scotandemily.com/podcast, where you can schedule a free 25-minute call with us to talk about your future, and getting you into the right relationship.

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The content in this show is NEVER generated by AI. We discovered it can't handle a joke a long time ago. Meanwhile, we'll keep the practical, actionable ideas coming as well as the entertaining part...all for free. If you love what you hear, please rate the show on the service you subscribed to it on (takes one second) and leave us a review. As we say here in Texas, we appreciate you!

2020 has finally drawn to a close and it's time to address 2021. What will the 'new normal' look like insofar as dating and relationships go? How soon until we can actually get there? What unexpected surprises might be in store for all of us, whether we're currently in a relationship or looking forward to getting into one? What can be observed from past pandemics and applied to the current dating situation? What are the perhaps untold truths about how men and women have been relating together all along for the last nine months? And what about some real-world strategies for making damn skippy sure 2021 is far better than 2020? How much of that is really within our control, anyway? Are we really going to be doomed to endless suggestions for 'Zoom dating'? Where can our source of optimism come from in a world where many believe it's as bad as it gets and won't get better anytime soon? Well, if you're going to favor an optimistic viewpoint, you're going to need a plan to bounce back. You don't have to go it alone. Go to https://scotandemily.com/podcast and start the year off right by scheduling a free 25-minute call with us to set that plan in motion.

=== HELP US SEND THE MESSAGE ===

The content in this show is NEVER generated by AI. We discovered it can't handle a joke a long time ago. Meanwhile, we'll keep the practical, actionable ideas coming as well as the entertaining part...all for free. If you love what you hear, please rate the show on the service you subscribed to it on (takes one second) and leave us a review. As we say here in Texas, we appreciate you!

Last week on The Mountain Top podcast I said out loud that I had never met anyone in a happy relationship who was miserable. That concept is worth a deeper discussion, and who better to have it with than the very woman I'm in a happy relationship with? Now obviously, one can be perfectly happy without being in any relationship at all, for sure. But right out of the gate, Emily floats several more complicated scenarios; asking if someone can be happy despite a miserable relationship, if miserable people necessarily get into equally miserable relationships, or if two people miserable in the same way can somehow contort themselves into their mutually-agreeable form of bliss together. But first things first. We define 'misery' in clear terms, then call out the 'elephant in the room' with regard to whether COVID lockdowns have wrought more relationship misery even among typically happy couples. What about couples who argue constantly, aren't they inherently miserable...or not necessarily? What happens when people who love drama get into relationships...does misery always ensue? Does relationship misery have to be a permanent state, or does it ebb and flow? Can it be cured completely? Can two miserable people alleviate each other's misery by finding love together? What are some practical ways people unwittingly doom their relationships to misery? And the biggest question of all...what twisted mindsets in today's post-modern world are contributing to record rates of relationship misery? Meanwhile, does dorkiness stave off misery? Well, after the dust clears from this crazy episode, the one certainty is that YOU don't want to end up in a miserable relationship yourself. Get a plan to fight back against the miserable statistics by talking to me for free. Just click the red button in the upper right hand corner at https://www.scotandemily.com/podcast

=== HELP US SEND THE MESSAGE ===

The content in this show is NEVER generated by AI. We discovered it can't handle a joke a long time ago. Meanwhile, we'll keep the practical, actionable ideas coming as well as the entertaining part...all for free. If you love what you hear, please rate the show on the service you subscribed to it on (takes one second) and leave us a review. As we say here in Texas, we appreciate you!

Everyone has heard about how men have a feminine side and women a masculine one. How true is that? And if it's the case, how does the concept typically manifest itself? Is it a good thing, or is it something we would be better off minimizing the effects of? And wait a minute...are the traits and behaviors that we somewhat automatically consider masculine or feminine really such, or are they simply human? What if all of this is just a social construct to begin with? But what if it isn't? Then what? Does that change the whole perspective? I mean, if masculinity is 'toxic' as we're led to believe nowadays, why are so many women trying to act like men? What if we all migrated toward the feminine instead? But can't there be such a thing as 'toxic femininity' in that case? After all, is femininity always 'soft' and inherently innocuous? And what of the idea that masculine dominance is sexy to women...how can that be? How come there are tomboys but no such thing as a tomgirl? What do single moms have to do with all of this? Stay tuned for the trait we've never really considered feminine before, but just might be...and we make a solid case for it. But all the while we're the same couple of dorks you know and love, who may or may not have knocked back a couple before hitting 'record' on this episode. Find the right relationship or dramatically improve the one you're already in. It all starts with a phone visit with us, free for 25 minutes. https://www.scotandemily.com/podcast

=== HELP US SEND THE MESSAGE ===

The content in this show is NEVER generated by AI. We discovered it can't handle a joke a long time ago. Meanwhile, we'll keep the practical, actionable ideas coming as well as the entertaining part...all for free. If you love what you hear, please rate the show on the service you subscribed to it on (takes one second) and leave us a review. As we say here in Texas, we appreciate you!

Parenthood is hot, and we can prove it! Curiously enough, however, the first direction we went in was debating the 'dad bod' and 'mom bod' factor. Do men really desire that rail-thin supermodel body, or do many prefer a woman shaped more like she's had a baby or two? In addition to what they look like, how do hot moms really turn guys on? Is how men act and carry themselves as dads even more profound an issue when it comes to turning those hot moms on? And how about 'boy moms'...what's the deal with them, and why are they so cool? How does life experience and parental obligation contribute to a particular affinity between single moms and single dads? When the idealistic 'halo' of childless singlehood fades, is that actually a good thing for a budding relationship? Why do so many dating coaches for men warn against dating single moms? Does that advice apply equally to single dads? Are there actually men and women out there who prefer single parents, even if they don't have any kids themselves? And God help us...what's the deal with 'dad jokes' and the certain women who love them? Find the show notes page at http://www.scotandemily.com/podcast. The program on how to have a great long-term relationship is finally available. Find the men's version at http://www.gettogetherstaytogether.com and the women's version at http://www.scotandemily.com.

=== HELP US SEND THE MESSAGE ===

The content in this show is NEVER generated by AI. We discovered it can't handle a joke a long time ago. Meanwhile, we'll keep the practical, actionable ideas coming as well as the entertaining part...all for free. If you love what you hear, please rate the show on the service you subscribed to it on (takes one second) and leave us a review. As we say here in Texas, we appreciate you!

This episode may come off as a bit weird up front, as it's the first show we've ever published to BOTH The Mountain Top and X & Y On The Fly feeds. But hey...we figured this is a timely conversation everyone can and should have, and also (more obviously) we're co-hosting this one together. So on with it... In this fast-paced show we talk candidly--and at times controversially--about how dating, relating and even socializing itself have changed in the last decade, and how we ourselves control what the next decade holds. What about online dating, apps and social media? Shouldn't it be easier than ever for men and women to meet, attract each other and build relationships? But instead, men and women appear to have lost touch with how to relate to each other. It's as if we as a human race have gotten better than ever at mere social manipulation, and place a higher value on that than real connection. As a result, are people justified in questioning the value of even pursuing a relationship nowadays? Have people in general become more pessimistic toward the other gender? And wait until you get Emily's take on how the #MeToo movement has influenced dating and relating. But the ultimate question is with regard to what happens going forward. What do we as a society really want from our relationships with each other? Find the show notes page at http://www.scotandemily.com/podcast. The program on how to have a great long-term relationship is finally available. Find the men's version at http://www.gettogetherstaytogether.com and the women's version at http://www.scotandemily.com.

=== HELP US SEND THE MESSAGE ===

The content in this show is NEVER generated by AI. We discovered it can't handle a joke a long time ago. Meanwhile, we'll keep the practical, actionable ideas coming as well as the entertaining part...all for free. If you love what you hear, please rate the show on the service you subscribed to it on (takes one second) and leave us a review. As we say here in Texas, we appreciate you!

This episode may come off as a bit weird up front, as it's the first show we've ever published to BOTH The Mountain Top and X & Y On The Fly feeds. But hey...we figured this is a timely conversation everyone can and should have, and also (more obviously) we're co-hosting this one together. So on with it... In this fast-paced show we talk candidly--and at times controversially--about how dating, relating and even socializing itself have changed in the last decade, and how we ourselves control what the next decade holds. What about online dating, apps and social media? Shouldn't it be easier than ever for men and women to meet, attract each other and build relationships? But instead, men and women appear to have lost touch with how to relate to each other. It's as if we as a human race have gotten better than ever at mere social manipulation, and place a higher value on that than real connection. As a result, are people justified in questioning the value of even pursuing a relationship nowadays? Have people in general become more pessimistic toward the other gender? And wait until you get Emily's take on how the #MeToo movement has influenced dating and relating. But the ultimate question is with regard to what happens going forward. What do we as a society really want from our relationships with each other? Find the show notes page at http://www.scotandemily.com/podcast. The program on how to have a great long-term relationship is finally available. Find the men's version at http://www.gettogetherstaytogether.com and the women's version at http://www.scotandemily.com.

=== HELP US SEND THE MESSAGE ===

The content in this show is NEVER generated by AI. We discovered it can't handle a joke a long time ago. Meanwhile, we'll keep the practical, actionable ideas coming as well as the entertaining part...all for free. If you love what you hear, please rate the show on the service you subscribed to it on (takes one second) and leave us a review. As we say here in Texas, we appreciate you!

First and foremost, you can find the OPPOSITE conversation on how women talk about men when they're not around over on episode 134 of The Mountain Top Podcast. It's a barnburner just like this one. In THIS episode, however, we talk about drunk confessions, what goes on during men-only excursions, how men treat their 'henpecked' or 'p-whipped' friends, and how they talk about their own girlfriends as opposed to each other's girlfriends. We also cover how men's demeanor in general changes outside of 'mixed company', the surprising and brutally-honest differences between how boys and mature men talk about women, and how men handle the problem of women who are easily offended. You're also in for a breakdown of how accurate cinematic portrayals of men-only conversations are, and how Clint Eastwood got it right in Gran Torino. Find the show notes page at http://www.scotandemily.com/podcast. The brand new program on how to have a great long-term relationship is finally available. Find the men's version at http://www.gettogetherstaytogether.com and the women's version at http://www.scotandemily.com.

=== HELP US SEND THE MESSAGE ===

We'll keep the solid, actionable content coming...all for free. If you love what you hear, please give us a 'thumbs up' by rating the show (takes one second) and leaving us a review. As they say here in Texas, we appreciate you!