Your Brain on Mom

In this episode of This Is Your Brain on Mom, Wendy and Barry talk about one of the hardest parts of dementia caregiving: the moment your parent still recognizes you, but you no longer fully recognize them.

After their mother’s diagnosis shifted from Alzheimer’s disease to mixed dementia — including Frontotemporal Dementia (FTD) and vascular dementia — they began facing personality changes, emotional outbursts, constant yelling, and the painful reality that dementia affects far more than memory.

The siblings open up about caregiver guilt, hospital life, behavioral changes, and the complicated emotions that come with trying to stay connected to someone who feels different every day.

Raw, funny, heartbreaking, and painfully honest, this episode captures the reality of living with dementia as a family — beyond the movie version people expect.

This Is Your Brain on Mom is a podcast about dementia caregiving, family dynamics, advocacy, humor, and surviving the chaos of caring for a parent with cognitive decline.

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Wait… it’s not Alzheimer’s?

In this episode of This Is Your Brain on Mom, Wendy and Barry unpack a major shift in their mom’s diagnosis—from Alzheimer’s to mixed dementia, including frontal temporal dementia (FTD) and vascular dementia.

And honestly? It explains a lot.

From extreme personality changes to aggression, language issues, and unpredictable behavior, this episode dives into what FTD actually looks like in real life—not just what Google tells you.

Because dementia isn’t one-size-fits-all.

There’s humor (because there has to be), but also the raw truth of what it’s like to watch your parent change in ways no one prepares you for.

If you’ve ever felt like the diagnosis doesn’t quite fit… or like you’re learning as you go in real time—this episode is for you.

🎧 Tune in and learn what mixed dementia really means—and why getting the right diagnosis matters.

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In this episode, Wendy and Barry get brutally honest about the moment everything changes—and the shocking lack of support that follows. Because the truth is: no one hands you a plan. No one tells you what’s dementia, what’s delirium, or what to do next. You’re given a diagnosis… and then you’re shown the door.

Inspired by a powerful post from Dr. Kalisha Bonds Johnson, we unpack the reality so many caregivers face: surviving day by day with no roadmap, no guidance, and no real-time help.

From their mom’s rapid decline following her Alzheimer’s diagnosis to navigating hospital discharges, psychosis, medications, and impossible decisions—this episode dives into the chaos of becoming a caregiver overnight.

This episode is for anyone who has ever thought: “What the hell do I do now?”

🎧 If you’re a caregiver—or love someone who is—you are not alone in this.

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It’s been 16 months… and somehow, we’re right back where we started.

What began as a plan to bring our mom home has turned into an ongoing cycle of hospital visits, medication changes, and uncertainty. In this episode, we share the reality of what happens when dementia care becomes unstable — and the system meant to support you starts to feel like it’s working against you.

After a chaotic holiday in the emergency room, we’re left asking impossible questions:

Where does she go if her care facility doesn’t want her back?
Why are medications constantly being changed when stability is the goal?
And how are caregivers supposed to navigate this with no guidance?

This episode also touches on something not talked about enough:
The lack of direction and support immediately after a dementia diagnosis — and how caregivers are often left to figure everything out alone.

Through humor, honesty, and unfiltered storytelling, we share what it really looks like behind the scenes of caregiving — the frustration, the heartbreak, and the moments that somehow still make you laugh.

If you’re navigating dementia, Alzheimer’s, or complex elder care, this episode will hit home.

You’re not alone in this.

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What are the early signs of frontotemporal dementia (FTD)—and how do you know it’s not just “personality changes”?

In this episode, we’re joined by Beth, host of FTD Navigating the Crap, who shares what it really looked like before her mom’s diagnosis. Not memory loss—but subtle, shocking shifts in behavior. Comments that felt out of character. A tone that didn’t match the woman she had always known.

Beth opens up about those early red flags, the confusion of a possible Alzheimer’s misdiagnosis, and the emotional reality of learning it was actually FTD—a completely different form of dementia.

We also talk about how quickly things progressed—from personality changes to becoming non-verbal and fully dependent—and what it means to navigate that as an only child.

And then there’s the part no one prepares you for:
being diagnosed… and then sent home with no support.

We talk about:

If you’ve ever thought, “this isn’t my mom”—but couldn’t explain why—this episode will hit home.

🎧 Raw, honest, and deeply validating for anyone navigating dementia.

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What happens when dementia isn’t about memory loss?

In this episode of This Is Your Brain on Mom, Wendy and Barry share a raw update on their mom’s condition as her behavior—not her memory—continues to spiral. From yelling and disrobing to falls and confusion, the symptoms are escalating, unpredictable, and impossible to fully explain. With no clear answers, the proposed solution is a transfer to a facility specializing in psychogeriatrics.

As they navigate disorganized care meetings, medication concerns—including the use of Haldol—and rapid physical decline, Wendy and Barry confront the reality of caregiving burnout and a system that often manages behaviors without understanding them.

Honest, chaotic, and unexpectedly funny, this episode captures the tension of recognizing your loved one is still there—even as everything else changes.

🎧 If you’re a caregiver, family member, or healthcare professional, this episode offers an unfiltered look at the complexities of dementia care—especially when the system struggles to keep up.

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What if it’s not Alzheimer’s?

In this powerful and deeply relatable conversation, we sit down with Alma Valencia — sandwich generation caregiver, advocate, and full-time daughter caring for her mother living with Frontal Temporal Dementia (FTD) — to unpack what happens when dementia doesn’t fit the mold.

Before receiving an FTD diagnosis, Alma’s mother was misdiagnosed with depression and alcoholism. The family questioned everything: Was it bipolar disorder? A personality disorder? A midlife crisis? Until the behavioral changes, financial chaos, language shifts, and loss of executive function could no longer be explained away.

Alma shares raw and sometimes shocking examples of how FTD showed up in her mother’s life — from unpaid rent and parking tickets to elaborate stories, impulsive decisions, and the gradual shrinking of vocabulary. 

We also discuss something many families experience but don’t talk about enough: personality shifts. The sweet church-going mother who never cursed begins using profanity. The filter disappears. Social boundaries fade. Humor becomes a coping mechanism.

If you are:

Caring for a parent with FTD or atypical dementia

Questioning a diagnosis that doesn’t fully make sense

Seeing behavioral symptoms that feel “beyond normal aging”

Navigating language loss or personality changes

Feeling isolated after a dementia diagnosis

This episode is for you.

Because dementia is not one-size-fits-all. And sometimes the hardest part isn’t the memory loss — it’s losing the version of the person you thought you knew.

🎧 Listen now and join the conversation.

Alma shares how caregiving transformed her life — from a fast-paced 20-year career in fashion to embracing caregiving as a vocation. She speaks candidly about building community, creating resources, and ensuring other families don’t feel as alone as she once did.

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When someone you love is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, the grief doesn’t wait for the end. It begins immediately — and it repeats.

In this powerful and deeply honest conversation, we sit down with Ethan, founder of the Memory Miles Project, to talk about caregiving, men’s mental health, anticipatory grief, and why “just stay strong” might be the most unhelpful advice caregivers receive.

After his grandfather was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, Ethan knew he wanted to raise awareness — but not in a way that felt performative or numbers-driven. Instead of running a marathon, he created something deeply personal: outdoor adventure challenges designed to spark real conversations about dementia, grief, and struggling out loud.

Through nighttime hikes in the fog, freezing winter challenges, and open conversations in nature, the Memory Miles Project connects Alzheimer’s awareness with mental health advocacy — creating space for caregivers and families to speak honestly about what this disease really does to the people around the diagnosis.

Ethan shares a moving story about regret, masculinity, and not always saying “I love you” — and the healing that came from realizing it was understood anyway.

If you are caring for a parent, grandparent, spouse, or loved one living with Alzheimer’s or dementia… if you are navigating anticipatory grief… if you’ve ever felt like you don’t have time to take care of your own mental health… this conversation will resonate deeply.

This episode is for caregivers, adult children, spouses, and anyone living in the long goodbye of dementia.

🎧 Listen now and join the conversation.

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What are the early signs of Alzheimer’s and dementia that families often miss? In this deeply personal episode, we sit down with Madeline, a long-distance caregiver whose father was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in 2019, to talk about the subtle red flags, cultural stigma, advocacy battles, and emotional toll of caregiving.

Madeline shares how her father—once the life of the party in Puerto Rico—began isolating, experiencing depression, hallucinations, repetitive shopping behaviors, and personality changes long before an official diagnosis. From navigating long-distance caregiving between Puerto Rico and Seattle, to fighting for earlier neurology appointments, to advocating for proper medication management, this conversation highlights what it really means to become your parent’s caregiver overnight.

Together, we discuss:

Early warning signs of Alzheimer’s that are often dismissed as depression or aging

Long-distance caregiving challenges

Sundowning and behavioral changes

Hallucinations and dementia-related paranoia

How to advocate for faster specialist appointments

The emotional whiplash of an Alzheimer’s diagnosis

Why dignity and purpose matter in memory care

Creative, purpose-driven activities for mid-stage dementia

Madeline’s caregiving approach is both practical and beautiful. By giving her father small handyman tasks, music, dancing, and meaningful daily routines, she preserves his dignity and sense of purpose. Her joyful, viral videos show that connection is still possible—even in memory care.

Follow Madeline’s journey on Instagram: @andy.maddy.alz
Her videos are a powerful reminder that Alzheimer’s is not just loss—it’s also love, adaptation, and advocacy.

This episode is for anyone navigating Alzheimer’s, dementia caregiving, memory care placement, caregiver burnout, or the complicated grief of watching a parent change in real time.

If you’ve ever wondered, “Was that an early sign?” — this conversation will resonate deeply.

🎧 Subscribe, follow, and leave a review to help more caregivers feel less alone.

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What if dementia isn’t a care crisis — but a societal one?

In this powerful episode of This Is Your Brain on Mom, we sit down with Teun Toebes, a Dutch activist and global advocate who made an extraordinary decision at just 21 years old: he moved into a closed dementia ward.

Not as a researcher. Not as a staff member. But as a neighbor.

Born in the south of the Netherlands, Teun first visited a nursing home at 17 and was struck by what he describes as a “surreal nobody’s land” — beautiful people living inside a system that sorted them by their diagnosis. What followed was not a project, but a way of life. He chose to live alongside people with Alzheimer’s and other forms of dementia to understand what life inside long-term care truly feels like.

In this deeply emotional and thought-provoking conversation, we explore:

What it’s really like inside a closed dementia ward

How nursing homes prioritize safety and control over individuality

The stigma surrounding Alzheimer’s and dementia

Why dementia is often framed as a “terminal disease” — and how that language strips humanity

The isolation so many residents face

The impact of intergenerational connection

Why Teun believes dementia is not a healthcare problem — but a societal issue

We also discuss Human Forever, the internationally acclaimed documentary Teun co-created with filmmaker Jonathan de Jong. After traveling to 11 countries, they uncovered a powerful truth: the greatest suffering experienced by people living with dementia often comes not from the diagnosis itself, but from how society treats them.

If you are caring for a parent with Alzheimer’s, supporting someone with early-onset dementia, or questioning how long-term care is structured, this episode will challenge and inspire you.

Dementia does not erase humanity.
Systems can.
But systems can also change.

🎧 Listen now to hear why Teun Toebes believes a better future for people living with dementia starts with all of us.

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