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Your Iconic Image : It's a Match! Treating Your Business Like Dating


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Emily Zimmermann and my business is called Grace Communications

The founder and CEO of Grace Communications, Emily Zimmermann, has over 15 years of experience leading marketing, public relations, event planning, and business development efforts for companies all over the United States. She has a demonstrated history of success with helping develop new companies and departments as well as extensive event planning and social media experience. She also has been responsible for public relations efforts in top markets all over the country such as Chicago, St. Louis, Minneapolis, and Charlotte. Her passion for marketing and helping businesses grow is what led her to form Grace Communications

Emily also has a passion for speaking and educating others in fun, unique ways. Her It's A Match Workshops use the same fundamentals that are successful in dating, to help in the business realm. She has a variety of experience with public speaking including hosting fashion shows, events, live television segments, grand openings, conferences, and virtual training sessions.

www.gracecommunicationsagency.com

www.marlanasemenza.com

Audio : Ariza Music Productions

Transcription : Vision In Word

Marlana  

Now founder and CEO of Grace Communications, Emily Zimmerman has over 15 years of experience leading marketing public relations and business development efforts for companies all over the United States. Her It's A Match workshops is the same fundamentals that are successful in dating to help businesses grow. Welcome, Emily.

Emily  

I'm so excited to be here. Thank you for having me on.

Marlana  

So, I'm really intrigued by this handling business like dating. So first, tell us what you see some of the similarities as being?

Emily  

I think there are unlimited similarities, honestly, this all came about because it was a way that I would kind of cope with the hardships of being an entrepreneur, it was how I would laugh about things. And I would find myself thinking like, this is like, when I used to be dating like this, or implying to me of how I felt before I got married, like, you know, and there were a lot of ups and downs, a lot of awkward situations. A lot of just, you know, are you a good fit? Are you not a good fit? Are you a match? Are you not a match. So, it was kind of one of those things where it was like a coping mechanism for me to change my mindset and look at it almost like a game or like something fun, when things would happen that were uncomfortable as a business owner. But some of the similarities, I think, right off the bat that most people are going to be like, Yeah, I can relate to that. 

Our rejection is a big one. So, as you know, a female entrepreneur or even just entrepreneur, in general, you don't have to even put gender in there. Rejection is just a constant, you know, you just have to be prepared for that. And I always feel like that if you can change your mind set on how you handle rejection, you can do almost anything, because there's that fear of being rejected that so many people have, it's the same in the dating realm. You feel like, one of the things that holds people back, I think, from putting themselves out there, and finding the one or whatever is, is rejection. And it's so easy to take it personally and to feel like, I'm just never going to find that right match, I'm never going to have never been a boyfriend, I'm never going to get married, or I'm never going to find that client, the clients that I want, you know, it's so similar.

I think for me, you know, I still allow myself to be sad if I get rejected, because I think that you're not a robot. So, you need to be able to let the feelings out. So, I have this role where I can have a day where I can cry, I could be depressed, I can just let it all out for one day. And then I have to, I have to just figure out how to grow from that. And I think it's the same with dating, you know, when you feel like you're all of a sudden rejected. And if it's kind of one sided, especially, it's it can feel just like this huge blow to your ego into your identity. So, I think it's important to change that mindset and be like, Yes, I'm sad about it, but what can I learn from this? How can I grow? And what is this opening up for me?

Marlana  

You know, because two things came to mind as you were saying that the first one was just like, you know, in both cases, you don't want to be all things to all people and there are people that you just like you don't want to be married to, you don't want to be in a business relationship with either. And the other thing too is, what I found is when a client eliminates themselves that's actually not a bad thing. Just like when a dating prospect eliminates themselves you could have launched a real bullet

Emily  

Oh yeah, definitely. I'm sure you have, and I think that's the healthier way of looking at it. It's not what you lost. It's what's opened up for you now. So I know for me in March of this year, I had a very difficult season in my business life where I had one of my long term clients just very suddenly decided not to work with my agency anymore and you feel rejected, you're like, all the weekends, all that needs other things you've given up to make that relationship work the same way you feel if you're in a long term relationship, and all of a sudden, they break up with you like via text or something, you're like all that time, like, it meant nothing. But that's not the reality of it, the reality of it is, for some reason, you're not aligned with them anymore, it's not working for them, or it's not working for you. So, it's time to break up, and you have to accept that, then think about all the things that are positive about it. 

For me with that client it was sad, because I was like, Oh, I'm gonna miss some of these things. But then I was like, I don't have to be on call on weekends anymore. You know, like, I don't have to do this. 20 Extra more hours that I can get, you know, all these other, you know, so you got to think about, like, all the winds of the breakup. And I think that's the same with dating, too. And I wish that I had more of that kind of mindset when I was dating, because I think I would have bounced back a lot quicker. Right. In that season of life.

Marlana  

So, we have the rejection piece of it. But what about the people that, let's say, are just bad daters in general, how do you go from being a bad business data to a good business data?

Emily  

I think it’s; you have to be painfully self-aware. Because a lot of have similarities between being good at dating or being good at a business dating is about knowing yourself enough to know how, what works for you in relationships. So, like you said, you're not going to be the right fit for everybody. Not everyone's a match for you. But if you know, maybe what triggers you, you know what I mean, like, there might be some personalities that are triggers, I know, I've discovered that. And I can tell pretty much immediately meeting someone, I'm like, this isn't gonna work, we're not going to get, we're not gonna have good chemistry, we're not going to align together. So, knowing that is helpful, but then also knowing what is good for you like, what is a complementary relationship or personality for you. And once you know that I think you can master almost any connection, because you'll know when to walk away, and you'll know when to move forward more. So, I think it's more about that self-awareness. It's not about really everybody else. It's more about you.

Marlana  

So, Is it snowing? Kind of, you know, what are our absolute? Yes, it's an absolute nose? Our

Emily  

I think so. I mean, one of the things that we do sometimes with It's A Match workshops, as we talked about, like love languages, and kind of personality tests, that sort of thing. And it's funny, because you can take the whole love language thing, and that can be translated into business to

Marlana  

do that for us.

Emily  

Yeah, yeah. So, you know, what, you know what? Your love language, not yours? Yours is? Yeah, so I'm really into spending time with people, quality time, that's huge for me. So, when you know that it's something that you can use to strengthen relationships. So once someone knows that about me, they're like, Okay, well, then one on one time would be really important, right? Like, not being on your phone, you know, while we're in the middle of a meeting, or giving me that quality time. And that's how I connect with people. 

The same thing if I was trying to connect with a potential client. And I mean, I don't know how we'd get that, first of all, before we even work together, but let's just say we somehow discovered that about each other. I think that's where you would know, okay, I'm gonna, I'm gonna go that extra step, and make sure I'm giving them that really personal kind of connection. If they're somebody that maybe likes gifts, you know, like, that's another one. And that doesn't mean you're materialistic. Maybe you just really enjoy giving and receiving gifts. That's a really easily translatable in the business realm. Because, you know, you can kind of personalize that don't just give them the Grace Communications logo pin. Unless they're a writer, then maybe that would make sense like a journal, but figuring out what makes them tick, and how you can kind of go above and beyond to personalize it. So, I think that's the gist of all of that when we talk about personality. tests are love languages are any of that, I think it's going beyond just the surface. And it's trying to connect with people on a level that you're not just a blurry face in the crowd. So, I think that's a huge problem with a lot of the dating and a lot of the business dating in our day and age. Honestly.

Marlana  

it's interesting to me, because part of my brain kick into, there must be certain ways, let's say when you take on a client to be able to, without asking them, What are your love languages? To find out things like how they want to be communicated to or various things that you can put into place? I would think so you know, how to handle the relationship better.

Emily  

Yeah, I think that's where like onboarding and having kind of, like certain routines in place before and after you sign with a client, whatever makes the most sense with your, your business model. But I think you having like, certain discovery questions, and I know we do that, but like exactly one of them is What's your preferred way of communicating? I think asking people what they don't like, Joe hate to be negative. But it's interesting, when you ask that you can kind of here about what they do like, as well. And some people are, it's easier for them to tell what they don't like. 

But I think that that's also showing again, that personal touch, like we care about you, you're not just another number, you're not just another client, we really want to invest in your future. It's the same with dating when you think about people that have charm. So that's one of the topics we talk about this charm. And you think about that, and most people that have charm, you think it's like this undefinable thing, it's not necessarily most of the time they make you feel like the only person in the world, they have that, that capacity, and you're just like, I am so amazing, you feel amazing, after you talk to them, you can do that for people with pay attention to them and learning certain things about them, and making it about them and not about you. That's the biggest thing, even if it's you're faking it, just make them feel like the only person in the world.

Marlana  

You know, and that's an interesting point, too, because the about page that everybody has on their webs. And so many times people go on and on and on and on and on about them. But really, you’re about page isn't about you, your business isn't about you, it's about how you can serve other people, and what you can do for them, and how you can make them shine and all those kinds of things. And I think it's kind of if you're having a conversation with somebody, or if you're in a relationship with someone, and all you do is talk about you, where's that gonna go?

Emily  

And especially if you're in a business where your client serving, you can't. And that's a huge mistake if you do make it all about you. It's kind of like, well, what are you going to do for me, like this is the Emily show you don't I mean, like it needs to be about the client. So. But that's fine to see these huge parallels with dating because I can think of several dates in the past where I didn't ever want to talk to that guy again. Because it he talked nonstop about himself. I don't even know if they knew my name like. Nobody wants to be around somebody like that. It's just off putting. And I think sometimes we can do that when we're nervous. So, I don't think you're always like a jerk. When you do that. I think sometimes you just come off wrong. And that's where like the first impression thing we talked about that sometimes it's matched as well. They kind of go hand in hand with like charm and chemistry and some of that because sometimes things can happen and you're off, you have an off day or an off moment, and you can make just a terrible first impression. 

There was the study, it said it takes like eight positive encounters after one negative first impression to build trust. And I was like, I think it was from Harvard. Don't quote me. But I read that, and I was like, Oh my gosh, that's probably true. Because if you think about it, and you meet someone and they do make a bad first impression, you just kind of like it would take a lot to overcome that. So, it makes it even more important that you do everything you can to make a great impression when you first meet people.

Marlana  

What are some tips that you can give us that will help us make a good first impression?

Emily  

Move! I think it's kind of like well does should do that, but smiling, you know, being like, positive body 

language, don't be like closed off doing some research on who you're meeting with. So, you know, what 

they like, what they don't like, don't be fake, like, don't pretend like I'm a marathon runner, just who they are, and then they're gonna find out no, you're lying. So, don't lie to make up a whole story but try to find commonalities with that person so you can bond with them. That's truthful. 

I will say that because it's like, we've all been there too, with people we've dated not to go back to that where you're like, so that was not true. They said that just, so smiling, you know, figure out what kind of welcome You know, there's certain cultural barriers to like, do you shake hands like that sort of thing. And also, I think being on time, there's certain things like that making sure you're on time, how you present yourself, not that it's the fashion show, but dress appropriately, if you're going to a very expensive fancy restaurant, don't show up in your athleisure. On the same token, though, if you're doing like a hike, or I don't know, something more informal, don't show up in a business. You know, just try to make sure you're being appropriate for the situation. 

I think the other thing with that, the biggest thing is the same thing, as chose we talked about its charm, it's not just about you, you can make a great impression. And honestly, they may want to work with you, and you barely even talked about yourself, I've had that happen, where I'll get off the discovery call with a potential client. And I didn't even get to, like sell myself at all, like, I don't know, if they're even gonna want to work with me. And it's surprising how much it doesn't matter. Those are some of the things you think matter, don't, it's more, you made it about them and they got what they needed from it. Right? So, it's kind of figuring that out beforehand, and not being fake, but also being a little strategic with how you present yourself.

Marlana  

Okay, so let's say they've decided they're going to enter into this relationship with us. It also would make sense to me that because when we first enter into a romantic relationship, our best foot forward and yes, we spent a lot of time putting in the effort to date them. And then as the relationship progresses, we put in a little less effort and a little less effort, because it becomes familiar and routine. So, what are your thoughts to on continuing to date your client, so to speak,

Emily  

I think that's where relationship routines are important. So, you know, just like you do like a date night or something with your significant other, having maybe like for what we do with our long-term clients, or in long term relationships with, we have set like weekly or monthly, or biweekly meetings, we figure out what works best for them. But we make sure that we have that time set aside. So that we can connect with them. If you can't meet in person, virtual, like doing a zoom call, I think is still better than doing just your phone call at all times. But I do think there's something to be said with in person as well. Especially if there's someone who It sounds weird, but like physical touch is one of the love languages, it's physical touch. 

People are not just about hugs and stuff, it's the physical environment. So being in their physical environment might be really important to that person. And I'm sure you know, some people who are really, really into like face-to-face stuff. It would be interesting; that might be one of their top love languages. Where are they, they don't feel connected, and unless they can see you, like, you know, even zoom, it doesn't cut it for them in the long run. So figuring out how to make that space to connect, I think is really, really important so that they're like, Okay, I...

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Your Iconic ImageBy Marlana Semenza

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