Your Next Chapter - step into the next version of you

This is an exciting episode for me, celebrating a significant personal milestone and launching a new Podcast Series! I’ve completed my book, “Your Next Chapter – Ditch your doubt, own your worth, and build the business you really want” and it’s available for pre-order on my website here. This episode walks you through the adventure and also signifies a return to podcasting with the “Under the Radar – ordinary women doing extraordinary things” series. I trust you’ll enjoy the next 8 episodes highlighting the projects, plans and next chapter journeys and experiences of a fabulous group of women just like you.

Show Notes

My book notes journal says 2018, and yet I only just finished by manuscript in September 2020. Sometimes our goals and plans are waylaid by circumstance, but if it’s important enough to you, you’ll always return and manage to hit the mark.

Imposter Syndrome and the Comparison Trap, two tools of the trade that your Inner Critic engages to keep you safe and small in your Familiar Zone, were challenges that almost prevented me from writing at all. I had to face these head on, many times to keep moving forward.

What helped?

The idea that I am a contributor, not the expert. I buy loads of books on the same subject, learn something new each time, and appreciate the different perspectives. My own book will be no different.

I had a huge brain dump session with a colleague who had written a book before – we got all my ideas out of my head and onto a whiteboard. I could then appreciate that perhaps I did have enough content and experience to write a book!  It also helped enormously to have a visual model – The Next Chapter Change Model, my own IP, that I could base the book around.

If you have a BIG endeavour you’re working towards, I highly recommend adopting the principles I followed -  setting trifecta, smart and HEART goals to focus your progress.
HEART stands for harmonious, engaging, aspirational, refreshing, and transformative. The idea is to blend your goals so they address both sides of the achievement coin, and to ensure that you create an environment that supports the likelihood of achieving these goals. I used a blend of SMART and HEART trifecta goals to write this book, to help to create and manage my own ‘expectation environment’.

SMART trifecta goal: To write a 35,000-word (acceptable), 40,000-word (stretch) or 50,000-word (unicorn) book that is ready for release by the end of 2020.

HEART goal: To write a book that provides inspiration and encouragement to women and to enjoy the process by working with an author coach who can encourage, inspire and assist you to write the best book I can; creating a working environment that makes me feel good whenever I sit down to write; and recognising and appreciating both my progress as a writer and the progress of the book by rewarding myself when I reach each chapter milestone.

I did not travel alone in this uncharted territory – I hired a coach. My author coach, Candice Davis

has been an amazing and consistent source of support, stretching my writing and helping me navigate doubt and comparison to writers whose work I admire so much… she kept reminding this is book #1 and that no book begins brilliantly – editing is the key.

I set up a routine – 6am up, short meditation, then

“We’ve been taught that thin = happy” says Leanne, “and that fads work and there is some perfect or right way to eat”. The trouble is none of this is true! Restriction is not sustainable. A punishment mindset is not sustainable. What is sustainable is trusting ourselves, following our instincts, eating for the joy and love of food!”

It’s a relief to chat with Leanne, a health and wellbeing coach for women who is based in Melbourne and encourages women to redefine wellness, what it actually means for you to be a Well Woman. This is a conversation that will get you thinking, moving and eating!

 

Show Notes

 

• It’s time to design your own Wellness Map – a set of ideas that fit you personally instead of you generically.

 

• What ways of moving bring you joy? Do that. What feels nourishing to eat for you? Eat that. What role will fun play in your life? Enjoy that!

 

• How you can lean into trusting yourself and your instincts and choices? By listening to your body and doing what it tells you! It does speak to you, regularly, it’s just that we’ve been programmed not to listen to what it has to say

 

• Try not to label yourself as a “stress eater” or a “comfort eater” – you might find yourself living up to the label

 

• Check in with your someone to help find your blind spots (mine was how the “go hard or go home” value I’d inherited was leading to significant self-sabotage in the health arena)

 

• Spring clean those beliefs! Ask yourself, is it true? Is it mine? Where did it come from?
  
  
• A core of self-worth is important for you to prioritise self-care

 

 

Leanne Vandeligt

 

Leanne Vandeligt is not your everyday personal trainer or coach, with 30 years of experience helping women to feel better, to like how the feel and look.  One thing she knows is that women are amazing, strong capable, but they don’t always feel like that.

She knows and understands the struggles women have around mindset and teaches women to feel happy first, so they are more likely to eat well, move their body be more motivated to take care of themselves. 

Samantha has been a performer her whole life – “I sang for 50 cents at weddings and a dollar at funerals from when I was a little girl. I sang backup for MC Hammer and with Joan Sutherland at the Australia Opera. I’ve led shows and developed my own. I’ve always been happiest on a stage but I’ve also been stuck in “people pleaser and approval” mode and that’s taken its toll. It even lead me to dropping the dream of being a performer for the “sensible” career option of accounting on the behest of my family.

Over the years Sam invested so much time and energy checking, testing, showing different pieces of herself to different groups to fit in and be seen in the way she felt she needed to be. It was exhausting. And when this is your focus, you begin to lose track of who you really are. But Sam has now interrupted this cycle. She chose to shift her gaze, to weave all the pieces of her into a whole. She began to approve of herself and appreciating where she’d come from, so she would never need to fit in anywhere again.

She has proactively created a new stage for her life, one where confidence and charisma intersect. She truly belongs and it’s extraordinary.

Show Notes

You can break free of the conditioning of your past and chose a new path forward

Firmly reject the “don’t be too big for your boots” judgments that might be levelled at you. Choose to shine.

Confidence is not ego. It’s about how you feel within yourself.

Charisma is about your ability to influence and there are 4 types – Kindness (Dalai Lama), Visionary (Steve Jobs) Focused (Oprah) and Authority (Churchill)

How do you tap into Charisma when you’re just not feeling it? Mindfulness, deep breathing, visualisation and a clear focus on those you want to help be the best they can be. Imagine yourself pulling on your coat of charisma!

Perfectionism can paralyse you – perfect is the enemy of good. Let it go and embrace spontaneity (this was a core understanding that came from Sam’s “365 Days of Facebook Live when she had to quieten her internal dialogue, put aside the spreadsheet of carefully planned content went out the window and replace it with authenticity).

Have the courage to discover that all you need in inside of you – you just need to take a small risk, unlock yourself for that confidence to begin to flow…because what you focus on grows

 

Samantha Leith

Samantha Leith is a Woman on A Mission.  A successful performer, entrepreneur and single mum.  She is an inspiring business owner, having taken her business from nada to major in only a few years, as a Business Strategist, Lifestyle Enthusiast, Coach and Speaker. Samantha started her working life as a professional singer, then got side tracked down the ‘safer more practical’ business roads.  She’s gone from Sales Manager, to Financial Controller, to owning her own online retail store, to hand holding business coach, musical theatre Producer and her true love - a  blend of speaking and coaching.

Samantha shares her message on how everyone can have the business (or job) and life of their dreams. 

Most of the people she works with are already achieving in business and life and are now ready to go to Unleash their Extraordinary. They connect well because she brings a balance of creativity and practicality along with the ability to hold people accountable and get stuff done.

Conference organisers book her to speak as Samantha guarantees to Entertain, Educate and Empower every time she takes to the stage by being expressive, emotionally intelligent, energetic, generous and inspiring.

Some of the areas she speaks, coaches and run workshops include:

• Creativity and use of music to connect and engage
• Business Growth Coaching for Entrepreneurs
• Presentation Skills for Executives
• Goal setting, achievement and accountability
• Communicating with Confidence and Charis

We’re feeling the shift. It’s time for a return, or is that actually a start, of what many have referred to as “the new normal”.  Borders are reopening. Gatherings are starting again. We’re remerging from one of the most unexpected and challenging times for business owners and individuals and you may be asking yourself, is it “business as usual? Do I simply market in the same ways I was before?”.

 

Kellie O’Brien and I got together to chat about the emerging trends were seeing in the market and with our own clients and would like to share our observations to add to yours. 

 

Show Notes

 

• Many businesses adapted their way of being, identifying new opportunities, pivoting to online – are there changes you’ll be making?

 

• Some business owners (like me) have, on reflection, found they were previously “addicted to busy” and are now deciding on a new approach

 

• Consistent strategy and captivating storytelling are still in style, and always will be

 

• The most important action you can take is to listen to your clients and what they’ve been experiencing – focus on being interested, not interesting
  
  Develop full cycle relationship marketing – clearly considered and value adding steps from first connection to your offer of service

 

• Trends we are seeing include personalisation, blended working arrangements, and increased acceptance and comfortability with online delivery

 

 

 

Kellie O’Brien

Kellie O’Brien is a Wollongong author, speaker and consultant who specialises in online marketing and social media for consultants, service professionals and small business owners who feel they're simply throwing darts at a marketing map.

Kellie empowers business owners to purposefully use storytelling, strategy and systems to build online marketing pathways that consistently move your ideal clients from discovering who you are online through to investing with you.

With 16 years as a journalist, 5 years owning a PR agency and now as an online marketing consultant, Kellie lives and breathes story and strategy. 

http://www.kellieobrien.com.au

You will probably have heard about the Know, Like and Trust factor, the KLT in business. All three of these things are incredibly important. But I have found there is something even more important and it needs to come first. This is the Seen, Heard and Understood factor, the SHU, if you like. I believe this is the most important thing you can focus on. It’s about getting off you and getting more into the shoes of these people that you're here to serve. And the magic is, when you focus on providing value, transparency and authenticity when you focus on being interested rather than on being interesting, when the members of your community do feel seen, heard and understood, they tend to like and trust you!

This episode unpacks this approach more for you.

Show Notes

The SHU Factor is enhanced by:

 

• Narrowing your focus to deepen your impact – when you focus on a particular slice of the market, you are better equipped to meet them where they are at, developing a deeper understanding of what they are experiencing

 

• Practicing active listening and deep questions – listen more than you talk, reflect and check for understanding

 

• Revisit your why – reconnect with the who and why you are doing what you do

 

• Check the copy and messaging on your website, ensuring you avoid the “Three Little Pigs” syndrome of it’s all about “me, me, me”. Swap this out for inclusive, inviting and empathetic messaging instead.

 

• Seek deeper, leisurely conversations with people in your audience - coffee dates, as I call them. Explore “what would be most useful for you”?. Take notes, check understanding, utilise their language in your copy.

All great change begins when you’re thinking is challenged – COVID 19 is a great unknown, it’s provided a non-optional pause for great slices of the world and for many of us this space has allowed contemplation – what might change as we move forward again?

My own musing was significantly expanded when I was introduced to an essay by Charles Eisenstein, a graduate of Yale University with degrees in economics and philosophy (a most unusual combination, so it’s perhaps not surprising that his writing is both ground-breaking and thought-provoking in many ways).

You can read The Coronation Essay here ( https://charleseisenstein.org/essays/the-coronation/) .

Charles is also a social philosopher focusing on themes of human cultural evolution, economics and consciousness, and the author of many books including Climate a new story and Sacred Economics, The More Beautiful world our hearts know is possible.

My good friend, author and Purpose Proponent, Carolyn Tate, was also an enthusiast reader and when we were comparing notes, we knew there was a deeper conversation to be had.

And so here it is… we hope it inspires you to have a conversation about what changes are now waiting for you in Your Next Chapter too. 

“You’re an active creator”, Angela Philp tells us. “You can take the circumstances facing you and shape them for yourself”. Self-Leadership is the key – what’s the seemingly impossible you want to make possible?

A dynamo of energy, fierce focus and commitment, Angela has found her passion and focus in life – “I believe that women need to make have 50% of the decision making capacity in this world”. To further that vison, Angela supports and challenges high achieving women with similarly big visions to take action on their dreams.

She is remarkable. And our conversation will energise and inspire you into your own new possible.

Show Notes

• Remember who you are – not the conditioned self, not the should and rights and wrongs
• There is always an inkling of an idea inside of you – be still and search for it
• I’ve found my soapbox – gender equality and equal leadership – what’s yours?
• Women are not a niche!
• I tempered my voice in the past – “Maybe I might not be liked” quietened me. Not anymore. The cost of keeping quiet is too high.
• Use your mistakes as springboards
• I cannot separate my work from who I am – each fuels the other
• When we’re focused on what we might lose from taking action, we miss what we may gain
• Follow your joy
• When you’re on a growth edge when you’re heart led, that’s when fear shows up. And that’s when you can choose to can meet it with courage.
• Say YES to your gifts and put them at the centre of your life and work. Your life’s work.
• Take a stand for something I your life that’s bigger than you, that you’d like to defend. Imagine, if I lived my life standing for that, how would my life be different?
• To change one’s life is a decision

How the world can change in a very short period of time! I’ve been absent from the Podcast for the past 3 weeks as I was feeling a little discombobulated. I did not want to “add to the noise” online, I wanted to contribute to the conversation instead. So, I allowed myself for these last 10 days or so, just to feel the feels” before I was ready to share with you again. I’ve now gathered some initial thoughts and would love to share the concepts of conscious choices in times of change with you.

Show Notes

• We need to allow our emotions, all of our emotions. IN the Recover Movement we all this “feel, deal, heal”. Whatever comes up for us, we need to experience it to move through to the other side. There's nothing to be gained by pushing it down, or avoiding our emotions or anything like that, because they will come back and demand to be hear!
• Whatever feelings you've been experiencing, I hope you can move yourself this space where you can simply allow yourself to feel them because none of them are wrong.
• Brene Brown talks about the FF T's - the effing first time, and this is certainly a FFT for most of us. There isn't a rulebook, there's nothing that we can turn to that says, “here’s the way to handle this”. So all we can do is “Google inside”, I guess, to work out what this new normal means to us.
• If you are a solo micro small business owner, what does it mean for your business going forward? What do you need to do now, next and later?
• I believe as we move through and out of this situation, we're going to be connecting even more deeply to meaning and purpose going forward in response to the recognition of how deeply important connection to other people is, how deeply important being of service to others is, and how deeply important adding value to the world is.
• It’s time to be a Lighthouse and an Anchor for your clients, to be, as my colleague and friend Donna Brown says, a refuge for your clients, a safe space to be away from the turmoil.
• Many brands have tended to rely on fear to sell and position themselves, using FOMO (fear of missing out) to close sales. This never really was appropriate but now it’s not at all!
• It’s really important for our economy to stay as a river and not a pond and we can contribute by continuing to invest in different ways. A pond that has no movement becomes stagnant, becomes a swamp. We do not want that for our businesses or for other people's businesses as well. A river may not be possible right now, perhaps think of it as a stream. What small investments can you still make to keep things moving?
• It’s not business as usual, we’re not moving full speed ahead with all the same messaging and activities as we had before this pandemic. That doesn't feel right. But neither does hiding. So pause and ask yourself, what does Conscious Visibility look like for you? And then do that.
• Now consider Conscious Observation - the power of example. What are other people doing in your space or in the business world at the moment? What makes you go aha, there's an idea, how might that work for me? This is about looking for inspiration.
• And now look at Conscious Connection. How can you collaborate and co create with other people at the moment?
• And finally, Conscious Kindness. Wherever possible, work with kindness, kindness to yourself, and kindness to others wherever possible. In any given situation that you're facing that is difficult, or that is threatening or that is scary or, or unusual, uncertain, pause and ask yourself, what would love to do in this situation? What would love do?

The discussion continues in the Your Next Chapter Community - come and join us!

In this episode, we explore how you might be self-sabotaging yourself by asking the wrong questions. 

Your brain is a meaning-seeking machine and so when you pose questions, it will happily supply answers to you. If the questions you ask create disempowering answers, they become roadblocks that can keep you stuck in discontent and results that are far from delightful!

Once you recognise this tendency, you can change it, asking better quality questions that are expansive and supportive and help you to move around self-sabotage and into growth.

Show Notes

The first step towards asking better questions is to recognise that you have a result in your business and life that is not what you desire. This self-awareness opens the door to change.

Underneath the result is a behaviour, and that action, of lack of action, is created by your feelings. The questions you ask yourself can be empowering and expansive, leading to positive feelings and actions or they can be disempowering and reductive, creating roadblocks that you may not even be aware of.

Debbie Ford summed this up perfectly - "Questions supply you with the wisdom you need to make what was previously unconscious, conscious so that you can choose with all the power that comes from being fully aware."

If you've recognised the need for change, let''s start with the conversations you have with yourself! Try flipping your questions:

• "Why is this so hard" becomes "How can I make this easier?"
• "Why can't I work this out" becomes "What do I need to be able to tackle this?"
• "Why can't I show up consistently online" becomes "How can I make showing up online more enjoyable for me?"

Now that you're opening up to more positive questions and answers, make and commit to the decision to change and then take a single action today in the new direction to get the ball rolling.

The key example in today's episode focused on my client who wants to be more visible online for her business growth, but there is an endless selection of possibilities that you can develop better questions, and choices, for.

I love the ten questions that Debbie Ford poses, and here they are for you:

1. Will this choice propel me toward an inspiring future or will it keep me stuck in the past?
2. Will this choice bring me long-term fulfilment or will it bring me short-term gratification?
3. Am I standing in my power or am I trying to please another?
4. Am I looking for what’s right or am I looking for what’s wrong?
5. Will this choice add to my life force or will it rob me of my energy?
6. Will I use this situation as a catalyst to grow and evolve or will I use it to beat myself up?
7. Does this choice empower me or does it disempower me?
8. Is this an act of self-love or is it an act of self-sabotage?
9. Is this an act of faith or is it an act of fear?
10. Am I choosing from my divinity or am I choosing from my humanity?

The discussion continues in the Your Next Chapter Community - come and join us!

Deciding what to charge for your services can sometimes create confusion and tension! In this episode, I walk you through some of the key considerations when setting your prices to make the experience a little easier.

Whilst there is no magic formula to reach an answer, as each business is so very personal, there is guidance to help you make a decision and there is always opportunity to change your pricing when you’ve had feedback from your market.

Show Notes

• Pricing decisions should not be made in isolation – there are several factors that exert influence over your price points
• Don't be afraid of competition – it’s actually a good thing as it shows you that there is a market for whatever it is that you're offering.
• Where do you want to be positioned in the marketplace? Are you going to be really accessible, set in the middle portion of the market or sit way up high?
• Create a positioning matrix to map the market – investment level/price on one axis and level of service on the other. Place yourself and other key service providers/alternatives to your brand on the matrix for clarity on your own relative positioning
• Once you have made your positioning decision, ensure congruence across all of your marketing that reinforces that positioning
• Consider your own Financial goals when setting your pricing
• Do not make a financial decision for your clients – ensure your own money mindset does not get in the way of your being well compensated for the value you add to the world
• Where does this products or service sit in your Offer Staircase? How will you price it relative to what else you provide to the market?
• Have you created a clear Value Proposition? Your offer needs to Resonate, Differentiate and Validate to be strong
• Check your testimonials for key areas of similar feedback to help establish your “uniqueness”
• The Sweet Spot of pricing sits between the Resentment Point (where you are cranky about how much you are doing for what you are being paid) and the Snap Point (where you are so terrified by the price you’ve set that you can’t think straight)