Your nEXt Chapter with Dr. Nicole | Healing From Divorce and Traumatic Life Transitions

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When betrayal shatters the life you thought you would have, faith can become the one thing that reminds you your story isn't over.

In this solo episode of Your Next Chapter, I share the seven spiritual practices that carried me through emotional abuse, betrayal, divorce, and rebuilding my life after a 28-year marriage. When everything I knew changed, my faith became an anchor that helped me find peace, strength, and hope again. 

Sometimes healing begins with the small things we return to every day. And even when life looks nothing like we imagined, our hardest chapters don’t have to be the end of our story.

Topics Covered:

00:00:00 – Episode snippet

00:02:23 – Getting personal about faith

00:07:27 – #1: Growing through God’s Word

00:10:29 – Sponsor: First Light Home Care of Bowie

00:11:55 – Finding strength in Scripture

00:16:40 – Peace in Psalm 23

00:19:39 – Trusting God through uncertainty

00:27:03 – #2: Choosing a Scripture-based word of the year

00:35:03 – #3: Having a gratitude journal

00:37:31 – #4: Reading devotionals

00:41:15 – #5: Strength through church community

00:43:38 – #6: Building a relationship with God through prayer

00:46:57 – #7: Sharing your testimony

00:50:24 – Seven spiritual practices recap

00:51:23 – Your Next Chapter Live! (event)

Key Takeaways:

“What He has in store for you is so much better than what you have now.”

“God sometimes will allow you to be in spaces and places where the very people who harmed you will see God's blessings on you.”

“My timing is my timing, but God's timing is perfect timing.”

“Even when things are difficult, there's always something to be thankful for.”

“Don't allow the enemy to keep your mouth closed, your testimony may be just the thing that somebody needs to keep going.”

✨Season 5 Sponsor: 

Our Season 5 sponsor is FirstLight Home Care of Bowie. They are a Black-woman owned non-medical home care agency serving families throughout Prince George’s County, MD since 2017. They offer specialized in-home care for individuals navigating: Dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease, Parkinson’s Disease, Stroke Recovery, and Diabetes. Please visit their website or call 301-778-1988 for more information.

Join us for Your nEXt Chapter Live! Sunday 11/8 at 1 pm in the DMV 🎉

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/your-next-chapter-live-tickets-2000830768690

Join our email list to stay up to date: bit.ly/joinYNC

☕ Support the podcast here: Buy Me a Coffee 

About Your Host

Dr. Nicole is a pediatrician, the owner of a successful healthcare consulting company, a riveting keynote and TEDx speaker, and the mom of two beautiful young adult daughters. From the outside, she appeared to have it all. But in 2023 she faced the most difficult challenge of her life- ending a 28-year marriage and navigating heartbreak, deception, and loss. Dr. Nicole is committed to creating a safe space where other women who have experienced a “divine disruption” can heal, recover, and THRIVE!

Connect with Dr. Nicole:

Linktree: https://linktr.ee/yournextchap

Your nEXt Chapter podcast explores the challenges and triumphs women face as they reclaim joy, reimagine the future, and redefine their identity after divorce and other unexpected life transitions. Join Dr. Nicole as she shares insights from her journey as a high-achieving professional woman navigating divorce while walking in her Christian faith.

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

What if the thing that interrupted your plans was actually the thing making room for a life you would have never chosen for yourself?

In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Kiarra King, an OB-GYN who experienced an unexpected career disruption at 39 weeks pregnant. What began as losing her job became the space she needed to rethink how she wanted to work, live, and use her skills.

We talk about trusting God when the future makes no sense, realizing that the skills we built in one chapter can carry us into another, and letting go of the version of success we were taught to pursue. Dr. Kiara also shares what it means to get radically aligned with who you are becoming instead of who everyone else expects you to be.

Sometimes the door that closes isn't the end of the story. It may be the reason you finally start writing a different one.

Topics Covered:

00:00:00 – Episode snippet

00:02:57 – Welcoming our guest, Dr. Kiarra King

00:04:30 – When career plans change

00:07:29 – Living beyond work

00:12:17 – Sponsor: First Light Home Care of Bowie

00:14:20 – Trusting God in uncertainty

00:18:02 – Asking for help

00:22:03 – Detaching from expectations

00:24:23 – Skills are transferrable

00:26:45 – Remembering what you’ve overcome

00:29:33 – Transferring resilience

00:33:51 – Get radically aligned with who you are

00:38:02 – Letting go of the plan

00:40:41 – Giving yourself permission

00:42:29 – One word: “Start”

00:43:08 – Connect with Dr. Kiarra King

Key Takeaways:

“Building resilience and fortitude means we can transfer that strength to whatever area of our life seems uncertain.”

“If God did it for them, he can do it for me.”

“Faith can look like reaching out to people that are willing to uplift you in moments of need.”"Share how you overcame, because you don't know what your story means to somebody else.”

“The life I'm living is so much better than the one that I was trying to desperately hold on to.”

✨Season 5 Sponsor: 

Our Season 5 sponsor is FirstLight Home Care of Bowie. They are a Black-woman owned non-medical home care agency serving families throughout Prince George’s County, MD since 2017. They offer specialized in-home care for individuals navigating: Dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease, Parkinson’s Disease, Stroke Recovery, and Diabetes. Please visit their website or call 301-778-1988 for more information.

Join us for Your nEXt Chapter Live! Sunday 11/8 at 1 pm in the DMV 🎉

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/your-next-chapter-live-tickets-2000830768690

Join our email list to stay up to date: bit.ly/joinYNC

☕ Support the podcast here: Buy Me a Coffee 

About the Guest

Dr. Kiarra King, M.D. is a Chicago-based board-certified OB-GYN, women’s health expert, speaker, and digital content creator. She is passionate about empowering women through education, relatable conversations, and wellness-focused content. Beyond medicine, Dr. King shares insights on fashion, lifestyle, purpose, and creating a life that reflects who you are becoming. 

Connect with Dr. Kiarra

IG: https://www.instagram.com/drkiarraking/

YT: https://www.youtube.com/@drkiarraking

FB: https://www.facebook.com/DrKiarraKing/

About Your Host

Dr. Nicole is a pediatrician, the owner of a successful healthcare consulting company, a riveting keynote and TEDx speaker, and the mom of two beautiful young adult daughters. From the outside, she appeared to have it all. But in 2023 she faced the most difficult challenge of her life- ending a 28-year marriage and navigating heartbreak, deception, and loss. Dr. Nicole is committed to creating a safe space where other women who have experienced a “divine disruption” can heal, recover, and THRIVE!

Connect with Dr. Nicole:

Linktree: https://linktr.ee/yournextchap

Your nEXt Chapter podcast explores the challenges and triumphs women face as they reclaim joy, reimagine the future, and redefine their identity after divorce and other unexpected life transitions. Join Dr. Nicole as she shares insights from her journey as a high-achieving professional woman navigating divorce while walking in her Christian faith.

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

The hardest decision isn't about what it will cost to leave. It's about what it is already costing you to stay. 

In this solo episode, I talk about the hidden costs of staying in situations that no longer serve us, whether it’s a marriage, relationship, job, friendship, or even a version of ourselves. Drawing from my own experience after ending a 28-year marriage, I share how looking at something as an asset or a liability can help us see what it is truly costing us.

This episode isn’t about telling you to stay or leave. It’s about asking honest questions, recognizing what is helping you grow, and considering what may be costing you more than you realize.

Topics Covered:

00:00:00 – Episode snippet

00:02:17 – The cost of staying

00:06:20 – When holding on hurts you

00:08:00 – Cost vs. investment

00:10:14 – Sponsor: First Light Home Care of Bowie

00:11:41 – When a relationship becomes a cost

00:13:30 – Giving more than you receive

00:15:53 – What is staying costing you?

00:17:15 – The hidden costs of staying

00:18:40 – The cost of staying vs. leaving

00:20:40 – Is your situation an asset or a liability?

00:21:10 – Don’t you lose yourself to make things work

00:22:30 – Thinking about a different future

00:23:00 – Your Next Chapter Live event details

Key Takeaways:

“Holding on to something that no longer serves you and to a version of your life that is no longer aligned is a slow, painful death.”

“The distinction between a cost and an investment lies in the anticipated future value.”

“If you are in a relationship where the value is depreciating and not appreciating, then there is a cost to staying.”

✨Season 5 Sponsor: 

Our Season 5 sponsor is FirstLight Home Care of Bowie. They are a Black-woman owned non-medical home care agency serving families throughout Prince George’s County, MD since 2017. They offer specialized in-home care for individuals navigating: Dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease, Parkinson’s Disease, Stroke Recovery, and Diabetes. Please visit their website or call 301-778-1988 for more information.

Join us for Your nEXt Chapter Live! Sunday 11/8 at 1 pm in the DMV 🎉

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/your-next-chapter-live-tickets-2000830768690

Join our email list to stay up to date: bit.ly/joinYNC

☕ Support the podcast here: Buy Me a Coffee 

About Your Host

Dr. Nicole is a pediatrician, the owner of a successful healthcare consulting company, a riveting keynote and TEDx speaker, and the mom of two beautiful young adult daughters. From the outside, she appeared to have it all. But in 2023 she faced the most difficult challenge of her life- ending a 28-year marriage and navigating heartbreak, deception, and loss. Dr. Nicole is committed to creating a safe space where other women who have experienced a “divine disruption” can heal, recover, and THRIVE!

Connect with Dr. Nicole:

Linktree: https://linktr.ee/yournextchap

Your nEXt Chapter podcast explores the challenges and triumphs women face as they reclaim joy, reimagine the future, and redefine their identity after divorce and other unexpected life transitions. Join Dr. Nicole as she shares insights from her journey as a high-achieving professional woman navigating divorce while walking in her Christian faith.

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

Sometimes, you can spend so much of your life being there for everyone else that you forget what it feels like to be fully present with yourself.

In this episode, I sit down with Bri Clay, a Board-certified sexologist and certified sensual shadow work practitioner, for a conversation about reconnecting with the parts of ourselves we may have quieted, neglected, or lost along the way. We talk about what happens when we begin to question the messages we have carried about our bodies, our desires, and what we are allowed to want. 

Because sometimes your next chapter is not about becoming someone new. It is about finding your way back to the woman who was there all along.

Topics Covered:

00:00:00 – Episode snippet

00:01:10 – Your Next Chapter Live event!

00:02:50 – Introducing our guest, Bri Clay

00:05:05 – Unlearning shame around pleasure

00:08:47 – Gender double standards around sexuality 

00:11:10 – Sponsor: First Light Home Care of Bowie

00:14:23 – What is sexology?

00:18:08 – Cultural messages about pleasure

00:21:05 – Slowing down to receive pleasure

00:26:51 – Reconnecting through self-care

00:28:50 – Seeing your body without criticism

00:38:58 – Rebuilding intimacy in marriage

00:41:24 – Discovering what you like now

00:42:40 – Building emotional safety in intimacy

00:46:24 – Reclaiming sensuality after divorce

00:48:50 – Knowing when you’re ready to date

00:51:10 – One word: “Reclaim”

00:52:18 – Connect with Bri Clay

Episode Mentioned:

Episode 40: Me, Myself and I: How to Date Yourself After Divorce

Episode 80: The Real Reason It's Hard for You to Receive

Key Takeaways:

“You have to write your own pleasure script because it’s not always about sex. Pleasure is what brings you joy.”

“Give yourself grace. Look at yourself, compliment yourself, embrace yourself.”

“Be your biggest cheerleader. Nobody should love your body more than you love your body.”

✨Season 5 Sponsor: 

Our Season 5 sponsor is FirstLight Home Care of Bowie. They are a Black-woman owned non-medical home care agency serving families throughout Prince George’s County, MD since 2017. They offer specialized in-home care for individuals navigating: Dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease, Parkinson’s Disease, Stroke Recovery, and Diabetes. Please visit their website or call 301-778-1988 for more information.Join us for Your nEXt Chapter Live! Sunday 11/8 at 1 pm in the DMV 🎉

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/your-next-chapter-live-tickets-2000830768690

Join our email list to stay up to date: bit.ly/joinYNC

☕ Support the podcast here: Buy Me a Coffee 

About the Guest

Bri Clay is the founder of Life After Divorce LLC, a certified life coach, American Board Certified Sexologist, and sensual shadow work practitioner. Drawing from her own experience after a 25-year marriage, she helps women rebuild with confidence, reconnect with themselves, and create fulfilling new chapters after divorce or significant relationship endings. 

Connect with Bri:

Web: https://yourlifeafterdivorce.com/ 

YT: https://www.youtube.com/@briharperclay451

About Your Host

Dr. Nicole is a pediatrician, the owner of a successful healthcare consulting company, a riveting keynote and TEDx speaker, and the mom of two beautiful young adult daughters. From the outside, she appeared to have it all. But in 2023 she faced the most difficult challenge of her life- ending a 28-year marriage and navigating heartbreak, deception, and loss. Dr. Nicole is committed to creating a safe space where other women who have experienced a “divine disruption” can heal, recover, and THRIVE!

Connect with Dr. Nicole:

Linktree: https://linktr.ee/yournextchap

Your nEXt Chapter podcast explores the challenges and triumphs women face as they reclaim joy, reimagine the future, and redefine their identity after divorce and other unexpected life transitions. Join Dr. Nicole as she shares insights from her journey as a high-achieving professional woman navigating divorce while walking in her Christian faith.

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

Dating after divorce is not just about finding someone new. It is also about learning not to lose yourself again. 

In this solo episode, I share five things I have learned from dating after divorce and what this season has taught me about myself. From recognizing inconsistency and trusting my instincts to doing my due diligence and becoming unapologetic about my needs and boundaries, I reflect on what it means to date with greater clarity and intention.

Together, we explore what it means to stop giving endless chances, believe people when they show you who they are, and choose discernment over attachment. 

After spending years learning how to stay, I am learning that sometimes the next chapter is about knowing when to walk away.

Topics Covered:

00:00:00 – Episode snippet

00:02:01 – Five lessons from dating after divorce

00:04:44 – Rediscovering myself before dating

00:06:30 – Lesson 1: 60 is not the new 40

00:09:56 – Sponsor: First Light Home Care of Bowie

00:12:47 – Thinking about long-term compatibility

00:17:44 – Lesson 2: GIFs are code for low effort

00:20:33 – Lesson 3: Third dates are overrated

00:22:26 – Being capable of necessary endings

00:23:19 – Lesson 4: A little “Magnum PI” energy

00:27:07 – Lesson 5: It’s OK to be “high maintenance”

00:29:22 – Protecting my boundaries

00:30:44 – Why inconsistency is a deal breaker

00:32:36 – Believe them when they show you who they are

00:34:25 – Taking a pause from dating apps

00:35:16 – Being happy while waiting

00:37:16 – Your Next Chapter Live event!

Key Takeaways:

“I believe that God is going to allow me to meet that person when the timing is right.”

“I am capable of amicably saying goodbye and of necessary endings. I am capable of centering myself and my needs and speaking up for myself.”

✨Season 5 Sponsor: 

Our Season 5 sponsor is FirstLight Home Care of Bowie. They are a Black-woman owned non-medical home care agency serving families throughout Prince George’s County, MD since 2017. They offer specialized in-home care for individuals navigating: Dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease, Parkinson’s Disease, Stroke Recovery, and Diabetes. Please visit their website or call 301-778-1988 for more information.

Join us for Your nEXt Chapter Live! Sunday 11/8 at 1 pm in the DMV 🎉

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/your-next-chapter-live-tickets-2000830768690

Join our email list to stay up to date: bit.ly/joinYNC

☕ Support the podcast here: Buy Me a Coffee 

About Your Host

Dr. Nicole is a pediatrician, the owner of a successful healthcare consulting company, a riveting keynote and TEDx speaker, and the mom of two beautiful young adult daughters. From the outside, she appeared to have it all. But in 2023 she faced the most difficult challenge of her life- ending a 28-year marriage and navigating heartbreak, deception, and loss. Dr. Nicole is committed to creating a safe space where other women who have experienced a “divine disruption” can heal, recover, and THRIVE!

Connect with Dr. Nicole:

Linktree: https://linktr.ee/yournextchap

Your nEXt Chapter podcast explores the challenges and triumphs women face as they reclaim joy, reimagine the future, and redefine their identity after divorce and other unexpected life transitions. Join Dr. Nicole as she shares insights from her journey as a high-achieving professional woman navigating divorce while walking in her Christian faith.

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

Grief isn't something you simply get over. It's something you learn to carry while making room for love, healing, and the parts of yourself you may have lost along the way.

In this episode, I sat down with Dr. Shanda McManus, physician and author of Brother Epistles, to talk about grief, loss, and what happens when we don't give ourselves permission to feel. She shares the deeply personal story of losing her brother, Monir, and how years of suppressed grief eventually led her to face her pain and reconnect with her own humanity.

Together, we explore what it means to stop being “the strong one,” allow yourself to grieve, carry both grief and love, and rediscover the things that nourish your soul.

Topics Covered:

00:00:00 – Episode snippet

00:01:40 – Introducing our guest, Dr. Shanda McManus 

00:03:18 – Being “the strong one”

00:06:07 – Giving yourself permission to feel

00:08:13 – Breaking the silence around grief

00:09:56 – Sponsor: First Light Home Care of Bowie

00:11:28 – Learning to carry grief

00:13:07 – Making room for love and grief

00:18:14 – Remembering Monir beyond his death

00:21:35 – How medicine discourages vulnerability

00:25:20 – Filling your empathy tank

00:27:08 – Nourishing your soul through creativity

00:32:05 – How writing became part of healing

00:35:10 – Creating Brother Epistles

00:37:29 – Allowing yourself to grieve

00:41:14 – One word: Allow

00:42:08 – Connect with Dr. Shanda

Key Takeaways:

“It is human to feel, it's human to be sad, it's human to grieve.” - Dr. Shanda McManus

“Grief is never over. You're not getting over it, and you don't have to but you need to learn how to carry it.” - Dr. Shanda McManus

✨Season 5 Sponsor: 

Our Season 5 sponsor is FirstLight Home Care of Bowie. They are a Black-woman owned non-medical home care agency serving families throughout Prince George’s County, MD since 2017. They offer specialized in-home care for individuals navigating: Dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease, Parkinson’s Disease, Stroke Recovery, and Diabetes. Please visit their website or call 301-778-1988 for more information.

Get your ticket to Your nEXt Chapter Live!

Join our email list to stay up to date: bit.ly/joinYNC

☕ Support the podcast here: Buy Me a Coffee 

About Our Guests

Dr. Shanda McManus, MD is a family medicine physician, writer, and Assistant Professor of Clinical Medicine at Hackensack Meridian School of Medicine. She has practiced medicine for over 20 years and is passionate about Narrative Medicine and the power of storytelling in healthcare. She is the author of Brother Epistles, a memoir honoring her late brother and exploring grief, race, memory, and medicine. 

Connect with Shanda
Web: https://www.shandamcmanus.com/

IG: https://www.instagram.com/shandaMDwrites

FB: https://www.facebook.com/shanda.mcmanus

About Your Host

Dr. Nicole is a pediatrician, the owner of a successful healthcare consulting company, a riveting keynote and TEDx speaker, and the mom of two beautiful young adult daughters. From the outside, she appeared to have it all. But in 2023 she faced the most difficult challenge of her life- ending a 28-year marriage and navigating heartbreak, deception, and loss. Dr. Nicole is committed to creating a safe space where other women who have experienced a “divine disruption” can heal, recover, and THRIVE!

Connect with Dr. Nicole:

Linktree: https://linktr.ee/yournextchap

Your nEXt Chapter podcast explores the challenges and triumphs women face as they reclaim joy, reimagine the future, and redefine their identity after divorce and other unexpected life transitions. Join Dr. Nicole as she shares insights from her journey as a high-achieving professional woman navigating divorce while walking in her Christian faith.

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

Living on autopilot can make it easy to keep moving forward without stopping to ask if you're still headed in the right direction. 

In this episode, I reflect on the years I spent on autopilot in my 28-year marriage and in my 17-year medical career, and how easy it is to keep moving forward because you're busy, comfortable, responsible, or simply used to the way things are. I share what it looked like for me to finally slow down, pay attention, and recognize that the plans I had made years ago didn't necessarily reflect who I was becoming.

This episode isn't about making sudden changes. It's about checking in with yourself, noticing what no longer fits, and being intentional about the direction you're taking.

Because sometimes the first step toward your next chapter is simply asking: If I were choosing this life today, would I still choose it?

Topics Covered:

 00:00:00 – Episode snippet

00:01:16 – Would you choose this life today?

00:02:34 – What does autopilot really mean?

00:06:51 – Autopilot in marriage

00:08:18 – How busyness keeps us on autopilot

00:10:06 – Season 5 Sponsor: First Light Home Care of Bowie 

00:12:49 – Autopilot in your career

00:14:16 – Listening to God’s direction

00:17:31 – When turbulence becomes unavoidable

00:19:23 – This isn't about quitting

00:21:23 – The cost of living on autopilot

00:23:40 – Check your instruments

00:26:18 – Take the wheel

00:27:23 – Map a new course

00:28:04 – Redesign your next chapter

Key Takeaways:

“Is this the life you would choose on purpose today if you are choosing it with fresh eyes?”

“If you think that it's scary to map out a new course, know that it's scarier to live a life that you're not supposed to live.”

✨Season 5 Sponsor: 

Our Season 5 sponsor is FirstLight Home Care of Bowie. They are a Black-woman owned non-medical home care agency serving families throughout Prince George’s County, MD since 2017. They offer specialized in-home care for individuals navigating: Dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease, Parkinson’s Disease, Stroke Recovery, and Diabetes. Please visit their website or call 301-778-1988 for more information.

Join our email list to stay up to date: bit.ly/joinYNC

☕ Support the podcast here: Buy Me a Coffee 

About Your Host

Dr. Nicole is a pediatrician, the owner of a successful healthcare consulting company, a riveting keynote and TEDx speaker, and the mom of two beautiful young adult daughters. From the outside, she appeared to have it all. But in 2023 she faced the most difficult challenge of her life- ending a 28-year marriage and navigating heartbreak, deception, and loss. Dr. Nicole is committed to creating a safe space where other women who have experienced a “divine disruption” can heal, recover, and THRIVE!

Connect with Dr. Nicole:

Linktree: https://linktr.ee/yournextchap

Your nEXt Chapter podcast explores the challenges and triumphs women face as they reclaim joy, reimagine the future, and redefine their identity after divorce and other unexpected life transitions. Join Dr. Nicole as she shares insights from her journey as a high-achieving professional woman navigating divorce while walking in her Christian faith.

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

Rebuilding isn't about going back to who you were. It's about discovering who you are becoming and having the courage to imagine what's possible next.

In this episode, I sat down with Hillary Livingston Giddings and Bethany Pace, co-creators of Sincerely Divorced, a global support community dedicated to breaking the stigma and isolation that often follows divorce. They share how their own experiences with divorce led them to build a community rooted in connection, vulnerability, and hope.

Together, we explore what it means to reframe divorce, let go of the version of yourself you thought you had to be, listen to your own voice again, and rebuild a life that actually aligns with who you are now.

Topics Covered:

 00:00:00 – Episode snippet

 00:01:48 – Introducing Hillary Livingston Giddings and Bethany Pace

 00:03:37 – The origin story of Sincerely Divorced

 00:05:06 – Showing up is enough

 00:08:06 – Healing through handwritten encouragement

 00:13:54 – Reframing divorce for high-achieving women

 00:16:38 – Letting life experience become your teacher

 00:20:25 – Pay attention to your voice

 00:21:17 – Let go of who you thought you were

 00:23:37 – Rebuilding after divorce

 00:24:11 – The courage it takes to rebuild

 00:30:34 – Healing the trauma of family court

 00:36:32 – Dating, unlearning, and discovering yourself after divorce

 00:43:19 – Creating a life that actually fits you

 00:47:00 – One word of Hillary: Brazen

 00:48:09 – One word of Bethany: Imagine

 00:49:09 – Embracing the Whimsy

 00:49:31 – Connect with Sincerely Divorced

Key Takeaways:

“Reframing shifts the view from what I didn't do or the target I did miss to what is next.” - Bethany Pace

“Show me a divorced woman and I'll show you the most courageous, most amazing, beautiful, strong person in the world.” – Dr. Nicole

“Pay attention to your voice and look for ways to hear yourself.” — Hillary Giddings

✨Season 5 Sponsor: 

Our Season 5 sponsor is FirstLight Home Care of Bowie. They are a Black-woman owned non-medical home care agency serving families throughout Prince George’s County, MD since 2017. They offer specialized in-home care for individuals navigating: Dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease, Parkinson’s Disease, Stroke Recovery, and Diabetes. Please visit their website or call 301-778-1988 for more information.

Join our email list to stay up to date: bit.ly/joinYNC

☕ Support the podcast here: Buy Me a Coffee 

About Our Guests

Hillary Livingston Giddings, M.S. and Bethany Pace, M.Ed. are the creators and co-founders of Sincerely, Divorced, a vibrant online and in-person community dedicated to reframing an often-shamed shared experience. Through compassionate advice, humor, research, and education on positive reframing, they help people navigate adversity, rebuild their lives, and find hope after divorce and other major life transitions.

Connect with Sincerely, Divorced
Website: https://sincerelydivorced.com/

About Your Host

Dr. Nicole is a pediatrician, the owner of a successful healthcare consulting company, a riveting keynote and TEDx speaker, and the mom of two beautiful young adult daughters. From the outside, she appeared to have it all. But in 2023 she faced the most difficult challenge of her life- ending a 28-year marriage and navigating heartbreak, deception, and loss. Dr. Nicole is committed to creating a safe space where other women who have experienced a “divine disruption” can heal, recover, and THRIVE!

Connect with Dr. Nicole:

Linktree: https://linktr.ee/yournextchap

Your nEXt Chapter podcast explores the challenges and triumphs women face as they reclaim joy, reimagine the future, and redefine their identity after divorce and other unexpected life transitions. Join Dr. Nicole as she shares insights from her journey as a high-achieving professional woman navigating divorce while walking in her Christian faith.

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

Staying in an unhealthy relationship is not always as simple as knowing you should leave.

In this episode, Dr. Nicole shares why she stayed in an emotionally abusive and toxic marriage for almost 30 years. We explore the reasons that can keep women in these relationships, including hoping things will change, feeling responsible for fixing or saving their partner, unhealthy attachment, trauma bonding, religion, finances, children, and not recognizing the abuse for what it is.

Together, we look at how these patterns can become normalized over time and why even high-achieving women can find themselves questioning what they are experiencing.

This episode is a reminder that understanding why you stayed can be an important part of understanding what you need next.

Topics Covered:

00:00:00 – Episode snippet

00:02:45 – Understanding emotional abuse

00:05:18 – The 10 reasons why women stay

00:07:31 – Reason #1: Things are not always bad

00:12:09 – Reason #2: Hoping things will change

00:14:54 – Reason #3: Love vs. unhealthy attachment

00:19:11 – Reason #4: Trauma bonding

00:26:20 – Reason #5: The desire to fix or save

00:30:56 – Reason #6: Religion keeps you stuck

00:34:46 – Reason #7: Financial barriers

00:36:53 – Reason #8: Children and family ties

00:39:23 – Reason #9: Feelings of unworthiness

00:41:20 – Reason #10: Lack of awareness

00:44:38 – Normalizing unhealthy behavior

00:45:39 – Recognizing the signs in yourself or others

00:47:24 – Your Next Chapter Live Is Coming 

Key Takeaways:

“The trauma bond is an unhealthy bond with an abusive person that leaves you searching for the next fix.” 

“You are made to feel that you are both responsible for their bad behavior and that you are the only person that can fix it.”

“It's not just that I thought I was the fixer, I was conditioned to be the fixer.”

“There is a level of unworthiness that allows us to stay. We stay because we don't even feel that we deserve more.”

Mentioned Episodes:

• Episode 2: Worthy: Reclaiming Your Joy After Divorce

https://podcasts.apple.com/ph/podcast/worthy-reclaiming-your-joy-after-divorce/id1775311850?i=1000676483085

• Episode 21: Break Every Chain with Patrick Weaver https://podcasts.apple.com/ph/podcast/break-every-chain-the-bible-divorce-and-emotional-abuse/id1775311850?i=1000702502192

Domestic Violence Hotline: Call 800-799-SAFE (7233) or Text ‘START’ to 88788

✨Season 5 Sponsor: 

Our Season 5 sponsor is FirstLight Home Care of Bowie. They are a Black-woman owned non-medical home care agency serving families throughout Prince George’s County, MD since 2017. They offer specialized in-home care for individuals navigating: Dementia and Alzheimer’s Disease, Parkinson’s Disease, Stroke Recovery, and Diabetes. Please visit their website or call 301-778-1988 for more information.

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About Your Host

Dr. Nicole is a pediatrician, the owner of a successful healthcare consulting company, a riveting keynote and TEDx speaker, and the mom of two beautiful young adult daughters. From the outside, she appeared to have it all. But in 2023 she faced the most difficult challenge of her life- ending a 28-year marriage and navigating heartbreak, deception, and loss. Dr. Nicole is committed to creating a safe space where other women who have experienced a “divine disruption” can heal, recover, and THRIVE!

Connect with Dr. Nicole:

Linktree: https://linktr.ee/yournextchap

Your nEXt Chapter podcast explores the challenges and triumphs women face as they reclaim joy, reimagine the future, and redefine their identity after divorce and other unexpected life transitions. Join Dr. Nicole as she shares insights from her journey as a high-achieving professional woman navigating divorce while walking in her Christian faith.

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Receiving can be just as difficult as giving, especially when you've spent years believing you have to earn everything people give you.

In this episode, I share why so many high-achieving women struggle to accept help, compliments, generosity, and support without feeling the need to repay it. We explore how worthiness, childhood conditioning, fear, and scarcity can shape the way we receive, along with practical ways to begin responding differently.

Together, we talk about letting go of the need to constantly reciprocate, building your "receiving muscle," and learning to simply say "thank you" without guilt.

This episode is a reminder that you don't have to earn every good thing that comes your way.

Topics Covered:

00:00:00 – Episode snippet

00:03:46 – The psychology of receiving

00:10:14 – Worthiness and receiving

00:12:46 – The ledger mindset

00:14:23 – The self-sufficiency trap

00:16:33 – Fear of future disappointment

00:18:46 – Having a scarcity mindset

00:20:43 – Fear vs. abundance

00:22:07 – Pause before reacting

00:24:00 – The power of "thank you"

00:25:11 – You are worthy of receiving

00:26:02 – Choosing abundance

00:27:33 – Building your receiving muscle

00:29:20 – Receiving God's blessings

00:31:09 – Closing words

Key Takeaways:

"At the root of having difficulty receiving, there's an issue with worthiness."

"Being self-sufficient can make it very difficult to allow other people to help you."

"You can't pray for abundance and hold on to old beliefs rooted in scarcity."

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☕ Support the podcast here: Buy Me a Coffee 

Episode Sponsors: 

• This episode is sponsored by Your Next Chapter LLC. Need a speaker? Book Dr. Nicole, TEDx and keynote speaker, to speak on life transitions, healing, and growth. Email [email protected] with “Speaker Request” to get started.

About Your Host

Dr. Nicole is a pediatrician, the owner of a successful healthcare consulting company, a riveting keynote and TEDx speaker, and the mom of two beautiful young adult daughters. From the outside, she appeared to have it all. But in 2023 she faced the most difficult challenge of her life- ending a 28-year marriage and navigating heartbreak, deception, and loss. Dr. Nicole is committed to creating a safe space where other women who have experienced a “divine disruption” can heal, recover, and THRIVE!

Connect with Dr. Nicole:

Linktree: https://linktr.ee/yournextchap

Your nEXt Chapter podcast explores the challenges and triumphs women face as they reclaim joy, reimagine the future, and redefine their identity after divorce and other unexpected life transitions. Join Dr. Nicole as she shares insights from her journey as a high-achieving professional woman navigating divorce while walking in her Christian faith.

Support the show