According to a narcissist you have to earn their love, their love language is to buy gifts. You can replace gifts, but you can’t replace this person. Their love is fake and requires you to follow their rules or they will discard you. You never once belonged to them or existed. It’s called hard life, in which the body gets stuck in flight or fight mode and eventually gets stuck. Once the individual learns to leave, the body will go into shock, but eventually will learn to rewire itself for the better good of the individual.