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Hey Mamas, welcome to another episode of Mom, Slow Down! Whether you’re a child of divorced parents, or you’ve gone through a divorce yourself, the ‘Big D’ is likely to have touched your life in some shape or form. Here to share her wisdom on navigating this tricky time is Wendy Sterling, top divorce media personality, international divorce coach, life transition specialist and founder of the Divorce Rehab, where she helps newly divorced men and women who are having trouble moving forward to find joy, self worth, and freedom. Wendy tells the story of her own divorce, and the pivotal experience of discovering life coaching, before training to become a coach herself. Wendy shares some powerful tips to build strong relationships, and tells us how one of the gifts of the work she has done on herself has been being able to empower her kids. She gets candid about how she knew it was time to divorce her husband, and offers us a new definition for intimacy, before offering up the pearl of wisdom that two happy homes are far better for kids than one full of turmoil and negative energy. We touch on the difference between parallel parenting and co-parenting, and how Wendy has moved from one to the other with her ex-husband. There are many elements of healing, and application is the most important thing. We hope you join us for this and many more amazing insights today. 

Key Points From This Episode:

• Wendy weighs in on the state of divorce following the pandemic, which is up 34%.
• Why she believes it is so high: people couldn’t run away from their problems anymore.
• How divorce is messy but it can also be a most empowering experience.
• The pivotal experience of discovering life coaching and training to become a coach.
• How her decision to get divorced accompanied her choice to start her business.
• Divorce Rehab, her five step proprietary program where she helps women recover from the emotions of their divorce so that they can start creating the life that they choose.
• How every sign she missed along the way to her divorce came down to communication.
• Advice for listeners: listen to your gut, really communicate, and be curious.
• One of the gifts of the work she has done on herself: being able to empower her kids.
• The first thing she discusses with clients considering divorce: how are you showing up?
• A definition of intimacy that goes beyond the physical: it starts with communication.
• Why two happy homes are better for kids than one full of turmoil and negative energy.
• How to begin to help your children through divorce into co-parenting.
• The parallel parenting approach that Wendy and her ex-husband took when they were first divorced and how it saved her emotional and mental pain.
• Reframing her divorce as something that happened for her, not to her. 
• What it means to create what you think and why everything starts with your mindset.

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

 Wendy Sterling
Wendy Sterling on Facebook
Wendy Sterling on Instagram
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Trauma is described as an emotional response to a terrible event. Today’s guest, Dr. Paula Madrid, is a forensic and clinical psychologist, and an expert in the field of trauma. She shares how witnessing trauma growing up in Columbia has given her greater empathy and resilience, before giving us her definition of trauma, and explains how significant behavioral changes through therapy can lead to changes in brain functioning. We discuss the differences between processing trauma from a disaster versus an abuse, and why interpersonal trauma comes with unique challenges. Dr. Madrid weighs in on the complex case of the American gymnast’s assault case and touches on how everyday traumatic situations can lead to PTSD without there being a specific traumatic event. She walks us through the three steps of trauma treatment, and introduces us to the concept of post-traumatic growth. We hope you join us to hear a wealth of wisdom from this expert in the field today. 

Key Points From This Episode:

• An introduction to today’s guest, forensic and clinical psychologist, Dr. Paula Madrid.
• How witnessing trauma growing up has given her greater empathy and resilience.
• Her memories of growing up in Columbia and being near difficult situations.
• Dr. Madrid gives us her definition for trauma.
• Why it is important to be mindful and respectful of the differences between our experiences.
• How trauma impacts all aspects of the body including sleep, respiration, and dermatology.
• The significant changes that people make as a result of therapy and how that can create changes in the brain chemistry.
• Self-esteem and the impact that trauma can have on this.
• The everyday traumatic situations that can lead to PTSD without a specific traumatic event.
• How there are differences between trauma following abuse versus disasters.
• Why interpersonal trauma is an extremely difficult to process situation and comes with guilt.
• Dr. Madrid weighs in on the complex case of the American gymnast’s assault case.
• How perpetrators create isolation and shame that leaves people feeling alone.
• The impact of chronic abuse that makes a person feel helplessness.
• Why PTSD and trauma can not be diagnosed without avoidance.
• The constant struggle between the need to feel safe and the memories.
• Risk and resiliency factors that predict who is and isn’t going to do well in recovery.
• What she learned working at a clinic with people who experienced trauma. 
• Stage one of treatment: stability, safety, and coping.
• Stage two: traumatic processing.
• Stage three: integrating your trauma by talking, sharing, and teaching people about it.
• The post-traumatic growth that occurs in most people.
• How avoidance is so common in therapy situations.
• Why many people stay in areas and situations where they experienced trauma: opportunity, belonging, denial. 
• How there is always denial in trauma and what the brain does to resolve cognitive dissonance.
• The best starting point for dealing with trauma: ask your primary care physician for a recommendation.

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

Dr. Paula Madrid
Dr. Paula Madrid on LinkedIn

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Many of us may not be aware of the immense impact that the energy of our homes have on our overall wellbeing. Triggers can arise from the smallest pile of bills to large unpacked boxes left behind closed doors. We have a real treat on the show today as we are joined by Carrie Leskowitz, author of OM for the hOMe. Carrie is a certified life coach and award winning designer with more than 20 years of experience transforming both spaces and lives. As founder of Carrie Leskowitz Interiors, she helps clients nurture the holistic connections between their homes and their physical, emotional, and spiritual health through self-exploration and reinvention. Her beautifully curated homes focus on the mind-body connection to promote overall wellbeing and an abundant life. As many of us have spent more time in our homes than ever before, Carrie is here to give us the tips on how to clean up our spaces and our minds. Stay tuned as we dive into what it means to create the energy in your home, strategies for identifying your red flags, and how design your home to serve you better. 

Key Points From This Episode:

• Understanding why homes carry their own energy. 
• What inspired Carrie to create OM for the hOMe and what it is based upon.
• The changes Carrie implemented in her own home as she went on her healing journey.
• How Carrie identified small triggers in her home and how to overcome them.
• Why a cluttered house can be a representation or reflection of something deeper.
• Learning to go inward in order to become more self-aware.
• Red flags in your home that can be an indication of areas that need self-work.
• How the pandemic has shifted the mindset of how we design our homes.
• Small strategies to create a more positive environment in your home space.
• Using the psychology of color to create moods through paint.
• Ways to incorporate new trends if you love them without it being a big expense.
• Implementing small tweaks to make your house feel “new”.
• The importance of creating an uplifting home that is safe, complete, and whole.
• The most inspiring home transformation that Carrie has been a part of.
• Understanding which plants work best for the feng shui in your home.
• What dinner time looks like at Carrie’s home and their family traditions.

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

Carrie Leskowitz on Twitter

Carrie Leskowitz on Instagram

Carrie Leskowitz Interiors

OM for the hOMe

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During this episode, we hear from board certified OBGYN, leading women’s sexual healthcare provider, founder and CEO of HerMD, about the mind body connection required for women to have good sex. Dr. Javaid has a positive outlook and believes that we are on the verge of a sexual healthcare revolution, and that we have to be mindful about the way we talk about sex in our households. We touch on the impact of growing up in a conservative household on getting in tune with your sexual self, and explore the positive and negative impact the pandemic has had on our sex lives. Lastly, Dr. Javaid talks about HerMD and the work that she does to empower and heal women there. Join us to learn more!
 
 Key Points From This Episode:

• Why the mind body connection is so important for women to have good sex.
• Why Dr. Javaid believes that women are becoming more comfortable having sex with themselves.
• Why Dr. Javaid thinks that we are on the verge of a sexual healthcare revolution. 
• How a lot of people who grow up in conservative households have a harder time getting in tune with their sexual self.
• Why we have to be very mindful about the way we talk about sex in our households.
• How the pandemic has impacted our sex lives while we are over scheduled.
• The positive impact that the pandemic has had on realizing the importance of sexual health.
• HerMD and the work that Dr. Javaid does there. 

Tweetables:

“I definitely think that we are on the verge of a sexual healthcare revolution. It’s just a matter of more of us offering this kind of education to patients.” — @SomiJavaid [0:05:13]

“A lot of people who grow up in conservative households have a harder time getting in tune with their sexual self.” — @SomiJavaid [0:06:22]

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

 Dr. Somi Javaid on Twitter
Dr. Somi Javaid on LinkedIn
Dr. Somi Javaid on Facebook
HerMD on Instagram
HerMD on Facebook
HerMD on Twitter
Ohnut
Dame
Sexual Medicine Society

ISSWSH
HerMD

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Female sexual wellness expert, Dr. Somi Javaid, is here to share her insights on the multitude of myths around female sexual disorder today. Tune in to hear the difference between desire and libido, and arousal, how female sexual arousal disorder is distinct from problems with libido and desire. We touch on painful sex, and the plentiful solutions available to treat sexual dysfunction on all levels. During this episode, we talk about the importance of being self-aware to track changes and communicate with your doctor, and why the number one thing we have to do is to get rid of the stigma and shame. We hope you join us to hear more! 

Key Points From This Episode:

• The difference between desire and libido, and arousal. 
• How female sexual arousal disorder is distinct from problems with libido and desire.
• Mind and body as critical as causes and treatment of problems with arousal. 
• The multitude of treatment options available and how you just have to be creative.
• How over 80% of her treatments are seeing other practitioners in order to get better.
• Painful sex and the three areas it can hurt: externally, within the vaginal canal, and deep in your pelvis or abdomen.
• Fibroids, ovarian cysts, scarring from endometriosis and more as the causes for pain.
• How our organs are meant to move during intercourse and the pain it causes if they don’t.
• Hormonal imbalances and how they create thin tissue that can be treated various ways.
• Skin disorders that can also impact sexual function and the options that are available to treat this.
• The importance of being self-aware to track changes and communicate with your doctor.
• Why the number one thing we have to do is get rid of the stigma and shame.

Tweetables:

“Female sexual arousal disorder is very distinct. We talk about libido as the intent, or the desire, so arousal is the next part of what’s happening. It’s both emotional and physical.” — @somijavaid [0:03:20]

“There are a lot of treatment options, you just have to be creative about where to find them.” — @somijavaid [0:05:22]
 
“That is the number one thing we have to do is just get rid of the stigma and shame. I mean the human population keeps perpetuating because someone keeps having sex right? We’re all a product of sex.” — @somijavaid [0:11:45]

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

 Dr. Somi Javaid on Twitter
Dr. Somi Javaid on LinkedIn
Dr. Somi Javaid on Facebook
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On this episode, we welcome back Dr. Somi Javaid, a board certified OBGYN and leading women’s healthcare provider. As we continue the conversation, we delve into the often elusive female orgasm, and the huge number of stoppage points that can inhibit orgasm. We talk about the problems with orgasm, including complete absence, interval to orgasm, intensity, and dissociative orgasm. The clitoris is the only organ in the human body that is solely dedicated to pleasure, and less than 25% of women can orgasm from traditional, penetrative sex. We explore why the kinds of orgasms you can have are to do with anatomy, and not skill, and delve into the difference between clitoral and internal orgasms. Next, we unpack some of the different forms of treatment available to improve sexual function. We hope you join us for another informative episode!
 
 Key Points From This Episode:

• How, if we knew everything that was involved in having an orgasm, it’s amazing that any of us ever reach it.
• The huge number of stoppage points that could be causing a lack of orgasm.
• Problems with orgasm: absence, interval to orgasm, intensity, and dissociative orgasm.
• How problems with orgasm are a lot more common than we think. 
• How the clitoris is the only organ in the human body that is solely dedicated to pleasure.
• The difference between clitoral and internal orgasms.
• How less than 25% of women can orgasm from traditional penetrative sex. 
• Why this is often because the clitoris is positioned closer to the vaginal opening.
• How the kinds of orgasm you can have is to do with anatomy and not skill.
• Why some of it is to do with self exploration and the rest a healthcare provider can help with.
• Treatments and medications that can assist the clitoris in reaching orgasm. 
• The importance of understanding what feels good to you.
• Pelvic floor physical therapy as a tool for improving orgasm.

Tweetables:

“If we knew everything that was involved in having an orgasm, it’s amazing that any of us ever reach it.” — @SomiJavaid [0:02:41]
 
“We have to have normal skin, brain, central and peripheral nervous systems, and you have to have good functioning levels of neural transmitters, so there are a lot of stoppage points where women will say, why am I not orgasming, and we have to figure out what’s causing it.” — @SomiJavaid [0:03:18]
 
“It’s a lot more common than we think, a lot of women struggle with orgasm.” — @SomiJavaid [0:04:56]
 
“The clitoris is the only organ in humans that is solely dedicated to pleasure. It also has the greatest concentration of nerve endings of any other organ.” — @SomiJavaid [0:05:37]

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

 Dr. Somi Javaid on Twitter
Dr. Somi Javaid on LinkedIn
Dr. Somi Javaid on Facebook
HerMD

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Sometimes it seems like everyone in the world is having better, more satisfying, spine tingling sex than you are. But today’s guest, a board certified OBGYN, leading women’s sexual healthcare provider, founder and CEO of HerMD, is here to help you unravel the web of questions around sexual health. On this episode, you will get a glimpse into some of the women’s stories Dr. Javaid has heard, and you’ll learn how, when you’re practicing doorknob medicine, you can’t really advocate for anyone. You’ll also hear what hypoactive sexual desire disorder, how it is under-diagnosed, and when a loss of libido is cause for concern. It can be hard to go from mom brain to closing the bedroom door and becoming somebody’s lover, but there is reassurance, because it’s totally normal to be too tired when you first have kids. Finding the right healthcare provider is absolutely key, and Dr. Javaid points us in the direction of some great resources to help us do so. There is hope, if you’re struggling with sexual function! We hope you join us today to hear more. 

Key Points From This Episode:

• An introduction to Dr. Somi Javaid and why she entered the world of female healthcare.
• A glimpse into some of the stories she was hearing from her female patients.
• How, when you’re practicing doorknob medicine, you can’t really advocate for anyone.
• The provider bias that exists even though women outnumber men in the healthcare industry.
• Why it is hard to talk about sexual dysfunction and how medicine alienates women.
• When there is a cause for concern with libido: when your loss of desire is not a direct result of a life change or a health condition, and it is bothering you for more than six months.
• HSDD: Hypoactive sexual desire disorder, and how it is under-diagnosed. 
• How there is reassurance, because it’s normal to be too tired when you have young kids.
• Why it is hard to go from mom brain to being somebody’s lover as a woman.
• Working on the relationship as the most important part of nourishing your sexual dynamic.
• One of the outcomes she tracks: mutually satisfying sexual experiences.
• Why Dr. Javaid considers masturbation to be a sexually satisfying experience. 
• The pink pill that works on neuroreceptors in the brain in natural ways. 
• How the FSFI is used to measure if patients are getting better.
• The non-hormonal injectable that can be used on demand to improve libido.
• How there is no testosterone-only medication that has been approved by the FDA.
• The topical forms that testosterone can be administered to women.
• How to find a provider: through the Sexual Medicine Society and ISSWSH.
• Why finding the right provider is absolutely key. 

Tweetables:

“The stories I was hearing were heartbreaking, whether someone had survived cancer and was struggling with their desire, or they had to have a hysterectomy, or they were just young and on birth control and sex really hurt.” — @SomiJavaid [0:03:48]

“When you’re practicing doorknob medicine, you have your hand on the door because you’ve got eight patients waiting, you can’t listen to anyone, you can’t advocate for them.” — @SomiJavaid [0:04:02]

“Women are still underrepresented in two out of every three clinical trials. Women, we’re different, we present differently. There’s inherent provider bias. ” —

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Healing Yourself to Heal the World with Akshaya Chinapa Reddy

 As moms, we often have to wear many different hats, but few of us excel at wearing all of them like today’s guest does! Akshaya Chinapa Reddy is a life coach, a mom, a rebel, a soul-seeker, and a compassionate human who helps high-functioning women develop a healthy mindset so that they can grow and transform in all areas of their lives. On today’s episode, she shares five intentional practices with us and explains why she believes that our mindsets are at the core of everything, and that an empowered woman can change the world through doing the necessary work. We discuss the power of ritual, and Akshaya shares some of the tools she uses in her own daily routine, including yoga, meditation, journaling, and crystals. A powerful message she shares with us today is the importance of connecting with your dream, no matter how wild and impossible it seems. You’ll also hear why believing you are worthy is the first step, and how, when you live your purpose, you allow for the healing of the whole world. We hope you join us to hear from this insightful and inspiring person today!

Key Points From This Episode:

• Why our mindsets are at the core of everything that we think, believe, and end up doing.
• Why a mindset of scarcity in terms of financial abundance shows up as not enough.
• Incremental change as a powerful tool to change perspective through reframing.
• How Akshaya has seen the mind get in the way, despite good intentions to change.
• How to look at what you are dealing with while realizing you are not your thoughts.
• Why Akshaya believes that living is, at its core, growing, shifting, and changing.
• How an empowered woman can change the world through doing the necessary work.
• What brought about the shift to embrace feeling and show emotion.
• Akshaya’s experience of healing, finding her truest self, and realizing this was something she could offer other women.
• How our kids can be our greatest teachers and reveal where we need to heal. 
• Why she believes in having rituals, which include a consistent wake up time, a nighttime routine, and not looking at her phone.
• How Akshaya uses crystals to set intentions and counter the belief that she is not worthy.
• The power of yoga to keep her mind in shape and the effect that has on her body.
• The importance of connecting with your dream, no matter how wild and impossible it seems.
• Why believing that you are worthy is the first step.
• How you allow for the healing of the whole world when you live your purpose.
• The importance of believing that your purpose is just as worthy as the next person’s.

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

Akshaya Chinapa Reddy on LinkedIn
Akshaya Chinapa Reddy on Instagram
Akshaya Chinapa Email
Akshaya Chinapa

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Money Matters with Joyce Marter

Many of us attach our worth to our financial status instead of realizing that we are innately worthy and deserving. Here today to discuss all things mindset, self worth, and mental wealth is licensed clinical professional counselor and expert in self esteem, mindfulness, and career development, Joyce Marter. Tune in to hear how Joyce discovered that, as clients progressed in therapy, they started making more money, and how she came to apply the same inner work to her own business. She considers money issues to be a part of the human condition, in the same way as mental health issues are par for the course for all of us. We touch on the difference between the male and female approach to negotiating fair pay and talk about the reasons people are reluctant to enter into financial conversations. Joyce recently wrote a book, which includes 12 mindsets that lead to holistic success, including mental wellness, physical health, connected relationships, and financial prosperity. To learn more about Joyce’s story of financial and personal triumph, tune in today!

Key Points From This Episode:

• Joyce’s observation that, as clients progressed in therapy, they started making more money.
• What she discovered as the reason: they were always working on their underlying self worth, which improved assertiveness, confidence and negotiation.
• How your money mindsets shapes your financial reality; thoughts dictate behaviors.
• Why Joyce believes that money issues are part of the human condition, like mental health. 
• The scarcity mindset she was raised with due to her father’s financial anxiety.
• Which aspects of clinical training she applied to help herself and her business.
• Joyce’s observation that male employees have consistently higher expectations.
• Reasons for people’s reluctance to talk about finances: their worth is tied up in their status.
• Some of the problems that can arise when there is an income gap within a couple.
• What motivated her to write The Financial Mindset Fix.
• The 12 mindsets in the book that lead to holistic success, which include mental wellness, physical health, connected relationships, and financial prosperity.
• Why awareness is so important: it leads to giving you a choice.
• Mindfulness as a tool for rooting yourself in the present moment in order to find peace.
• How the pandemic has caused a mental and financial health crisis and the solution to this.
• Being a receiver as a skillset we need to work on, especially as women.
• The lesson Joyce learnt which led to her welcoming a great love into her life.

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

 The Financial Mindset Fix

Joyce Marter

Joyce Marter on Twitter

Joyce Marter on Facebook

Joyce Marter on LinkedIn
Joyce Marter on Instagram
Joyce Marter on YouTube
Urban Balance

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Yoga is multifaceted, and each of us has a unique experience and perspective to share. Today, we welcome Lara Heimann, an international yoga pioneer and physical therapist focused on evolving the practice of yoga to empower movement and balance among a modern lifestyle of technology and sedentariness. She is redefining the practice of yoga through her LYT method, emphasizing smart alignment, functional movement, and spiritual wellness and, in today’s episode, you’ll hear how Lara found yoga by accident and instantly fell in love. You’ll also hear how she integrated education about the body into her yoga teaching practice, which daily habits we bring onto the mat, and why she found it so exciting to explore different methods of movement through yoga. Lara unpacks how the LYT method is the meeting place between physical therapy and yoga and hones in on perseverance and flow. You’ll also be introduced to her beliefs around teaching well and inviting people in to experience their own power, and we touch on the power of moving in a variety of different ways and the energy we leak if we don’t strengthen our cores, plus so much more. We hope you will join us!

Key Points From This Episode:

• An introduction to today’s guest, Lara Heimann.
• How Lara found yoga by accident through her involvement in fitness and movement. 
• Her first experience at a free yoga class called Power Yoga and how she fell in love.
• The first yoga class she taught at a gym, which she called ‘flexible strength’.
• How she integrated education about the body into her yoga teaching practice.
• Which daily habits we bring to the mat and how we can reinforce rather than change them.
• Why she found it so exciting to explore different methods of movement through yoga. 
• The escape from binary thinking that yoga classes present.
• What yoga asks instead of binary performance-related questions.
• How Lara continues to redefine her yoga practice through having an open mind.
• Her belief that yoga’s power is in the impact of attention and awareness on mind and body.
• Why you can’t expect kindness from others if you don’t embody it yourself.
• The LYT method and how it hones in on perseverance and flow as a fusion between physical therapy and yoga.
• How Lara incorporates a reset into the beginning of every class.
• What it means to broaden your perspective on being a healthy, wholesome human.
• Lara’s beliefs around teaching well and inviting people in to experience their own power.
• Why we lose an opportunity to strengthen our scapula stabilizers if we don’t get on all fours.
• How you reshape your posture when you are not moving in a variety of ways.
• The energy that you leak if you do not strengthen your core.
• Balance as a spectrum rather than a point.
• The 600 classes listed on the LYT website and the virtual studio where you can practice.
• How the ‘why’ behind yoga is a very important piece of your practice.
• How redefining yoga is about having an inquiring mind and paying attention.
• The aliveness that being in flow state can bring to your life.

Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:

Lara Heimann on Instagram

LYT Yoga
LYT Yoga on Facebook
Redefining Yoga

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