It's a cyberpunk trip through the Internet with Keanu Reeves as he portrays Johnny Mnemonic, a hard-drive installed brain courier guy who has to deliver the cure for Chronic Internetitis Addiction to a group of resistance fighters trying to free our minds from evil corporate influence.....or something?

The primary problem with this film is that it makes no a lick of sense. Johnny's motivations are contradictory to his actions. The "bad guys" do things to stop Johnny from making his delivers when it seems that they are the only people that would want to hire him in the first place. Everyone seems to be just doing things to do things. Really if everyone just lets Johnny deliver his digital goods, then its in everyone's best interests. Lastly, the whole idea is that Johnny has to deliver 320GB in person with the data stored in his brain. Today, we do that by uploading the data to the cloud and no brain courier is ever needed. It's a terribly inaccurate vision of the future.

The good news is that its a total blast of badness that is a true gem to watch. It's impossibly stupid, horribly ridiculous, and laugh a minute fun. The action sequences are super dumb and combined with the "going into the Internet" scenes make for a ton of laughs and good riffing with friends. There's never a dull moment in this film and makes for a great viewing experience. Get out your VCRs, put this in, travel into the future and then be ready to try to figure out what the hell just happened with some friends.

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Brought to you by Johnny Pneumatic. Keanu Reeves and Rosmand Pike gets trapped in an annoying steampunk world and gets his armed replaced with a drill (just go with it).

Its time for us to finally see what the Internet looks like from the inside with 1995's Johnny Mnemonic, starring Keanu Reeves and Dina Meyer, with fun appearances of Dolph Lundgren, Henry Rollins, Udo Kier and Ice-T doesn't screw it up!

Its the story of a virgin teaming up with a very loose woman on the hunt of an ugly car. It stars Mark Hamill and Annie Potts and its called Corvette Summer. Its possibly the greatest love story told in a bad movie and is one step away from actually being a good movie. But an ugly car, poor production values, and plot holes keep it from getting there.

So Mark Hamill plays a recent high school grad, named Kenny who is a mechanical wizard, but a socially awkward virgin. Kenny has rebuilt a Corvette Stingray as part of his high school shop class. The car gets stolen on its first day out and Kenny is heart-broken. He gets a tip that the car is in Vegas so Kenny goes in search of it. Along the way, he meets a "hooker in training" named Vanessa (Annie Potts) who helps him out by letting him live in her van and search for the car.

On the whole, this film is so close to being a sleeper for good movies. If we'd seen a little more adult content (such as when Vanessa gets beat up by a "john") and less kiddie elements (such as the car being so over the top and the score), it may still be talked about by good movie people today. Instead its an almost good film that is stuck in bad movie land, to which we say "Thank you".

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Presented by Corellian Corvette Summer, the story of a moisture farmer and a Twilek with a heart of gold that gets his CR90 Corvette stolen. If only he'd made it to Tashi Station...

Justin delivers his favorite romantic bad movie with Mark Hamill and Annie Potts and the buttest Corvette ever. Its Corvette Summer from 1978. It's the story of a socially awkward virgin on the hunt of a stolen ugly car, along the way falling for a hooker in training. 

The very first Razzie winner gets an in depth look and wow, is it bad. It truly is worse than Xanadu (which we feel is quite the achievement). Its a fake biopic of how the Village People became successful but has no basis of reality. And we should mention that its super gay (not that there's anything wrong with that).

The film builds a universe that is not something we want to have anything to do with. People don't have jobs, people just come in and out of people's homes, random people off the street get pulled into parties without wanting to come to and people have NO concept of how anything works in real life. New York is built to be Camelot from Monty Python's Quest for the Holy Grail (Never mind, let's not go to Camelot. Ti's a silly place.) We would not like to go there.

The real badness of this film is that they try to, as Sam puts it, "knock the gay off the Village People". The gayness of this movie is the truly fun part of the film but it is so muffled by the stupid story and by trying to make the Village People's characters be straight men. If you went to see this movie wanting to see a film about gay men shaking their asses, then you won't get it. Its so stuffed with characters that truly don't matter to the plot of the film and scenes that don't matter to the plot. Which leads to a too-long film with only about 10 minutes of fun.

This one is close to being a fun time but it just is too damn long with too much dull dialogue and terrible jokes to make it truly fun. The stars of the show are the actual Village People but it's too muddled up with character development and backstories of Jack (Guttenberg), Samantha (Valerie Perrine), and Ron (Jenner). It is required viewing for bad movie fans but don't expect a good time.

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Presented by Behind the Music: The Village People. In this in depth look, we learn about the Village People's little known 7th member, the Homophobe.

Jackie chooses yet another movie with crazy costumes and singin' and dancin'. But will the very first Razzie winner scare her away from making the same mistakes as A Star is Born and Xanadu? Or will a bunch of gay men that can actually sing and dance win over Sam's fear of disco? Check out Can't Stop the Music currently on Netflix and join in on the fun with us.

We go for a ride with Hard Ticket to Hawaii, directed by bad movie hall of fame director, Andy Sidaris. Expect guns, boobs, jokes, ridiculous action sequences, splosions, more boobs, tough guys and gals and don't forget there's a snake in this movie!

It's the first film in the Sidaris collection that features Donna and Taryn, two rad hot chicks who work for The Agency, the super secret government organization that fights crime, drugs, kidnappers and terrorists. This time to duo team up with Rowdy Abilene and a karate guy named Jade to take down a drug dealer in Hawaii. Along the way, they make sure to take their shirts off whenever they feel like it, free a giant mutated snake, face a skate-boarding assassin, and play some deadly Frisbee on the beach.

We love this film and highly recommend it. It's a must see. Make sure to listen to that and also be sure to visi tandysidaris.com and pick up a copy of the Girls, Guns and G-Strings collection (which includes Hard Ticket to Hawaii). Its one of the best DVD collections out there.

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We open this episode with Justin applying for The Agency, the guns, girls and g-strings government group from the Andy Sidaris films.

We take up our second Andy Sidaris film with Hard Ticket to Hawaii. It's a fun film that we all love with busty ladies, fun jokes, crazy assasins, huge explosions and an evil snake. What more could you want?

We also end this episode with a fine interview between Sam and the film's producer, Arlene Sidaris. Make sure to listen to that and also be sure to visit andysidaris.com and pick up a copy of the Girls, Guns and G-Strings collection (which includes Hard Ticket to Hawaii). Its one of the best DVD collections out there. 12 movies for only $9.98?!?!

Brian Bosworth stars this week as Joe Huff/John Stone/All Awesome in Stone Cold with William Forsythe and Lance Henriksen. Its the tale of one tough cop that goes undercover to accomplish absolutely nothing in preventing a biker gang destroying the entire government of Mississippi. Mullets, earrings, giant lizards, exploding choppers, and a ridiculously high body count makes up for one fun ride.

The very funny Ryan Fortier from the "Writing Through Vet School" blog joins us this week to help us make sense of this movie. Ryan is the author of "Paranoia" (available for $2.99) and one of the funniest bad movie reviewers. You can follow Ryan at https://quietthinker1.wordpress.com/ and read his bad movie reviews at https://quietthinker1.wordpress.com/category/bad-movies-2/.

The film is quite action packed and rarely has any slow moments. When things do quiet down in the middle, there's just so head-scratching to try and figure out what the heck this thing is all about that it fills in nicely. The end is absolutely amazing, the beginning is at 11, the Boz fills out the middle quite entertainingly. We loved this movie (except for Jackie) and highly recommend it.

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Take one Brian "The Boz" Bosworth, put him in the role of one tough cop and let him do his own hair and costumes and you've got 1991's Stone Cold directed by stinker staple Craig R. Baxley. It's one of Justin's favorite bad movies so get jacked!