10% Happier with Dan Harris

Why "how am I feeling?" isn't always the right question, why resilience doesn't mean what you think it means, and how rituals can steady you.

Dr. Suzan Song is a Harvard- and Stanford-trained psychiatrist, humanitarian researcher, and adviser. For more than two decades, she has dedicated her work to building resilience in individuals and communities affected by adversity. She has a private practice in Washington D.C., is a professor of psychiatry at George Washington University, and is a sought-after speaker on the science of healing. Her new book is Why We Suffer and How We Heal: Using Narrative, Ritual, and Purpose to Flourish Through Life's Challenges.

In this episode we talk about:

• How a violent attack on her father shaped her life's work
• Why we recreate the painful situations we swore we'd avoid
• Why chasing stability causes so much of our suffering
• Three tools for hard times: narrative, ritual, and purpose
• How to spot and rewrite the scripts running our lives
• How people heal in countries with almost no therapists
• Why validation has to come before asking someone to change
• Why purpose is about being needed, not achieving more
• Why she thinks we've gotten "resilience" all wrong

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Additional Resources:

• Run, Run Pure Beauty

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Buddhist advice on taking care of yourself so you can take care of the world, including what to do with your outrage, and why looking for the good on purpose isn't denial.

The news is painful right now. And for most of us, the options we reach for — doom-scrolling, rage-posting, or unplugging entirely — don't actually help. Meditation teacher and bestselling author Sharon Salzberg joins Dan to take live questions from the 10% with Dan Harris community on how to find solid ground when the world feels like it's on fire.

In this conversation, Sharon Salzberg and Dan Harris discuss:

• How to feel your anger without being consumed by it — and why that distinction matters
• What's usually hiding underneath the anger: grief, fear, and sadness
• Why action is the antidote to despair — and what actually counts as action
• How civil rights movement leaders sustained their effort in the face of uncertainty
• How to handle guilt about not doing enough
• Why "look for the helpers" is more than a platitude
• Whether meditation can possibly be relevant in a full-blown poly-crisis — Sharon's answer may surprise you
• Sharon Salzberg is one of the most influential meditation teachers in the Western world. She has been teaching for over four decades and is a co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society in Barre, Massachusetts. She is the author of many books, including Lovingkindness and Real Happiness. Find more of her guided meditations in the 10% with Dan Harris app.

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Buddhist advice on the feeling of "I'm not enough," the voice that says "if I don't do it, no one will," and tolerating uncertainty without impatience.

Santacitta Bhikkhuni trained as a nun in England & Asia, primarily in the lineage of Ajahn Chah and has also received teachings in the Shechen lineage of Tibetan Buddhism. She is committed to Gaia as a living being and resides at Aloka Earth Room, currently in San Rafael, California. She recently co-authored the book What Are You Waiting For? A Conversation about Buddhism between Two Old Friends. You can find more of Ayya's teachings in audio & video format, as well as ongoing events in-person & online.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why self-improvement might be the wrong goal entirely
• The upside of having your heart broken
• Why patience isn't just for old ladies
• How to actually tolerate uncertainty
• The difference between reacting and responding
• What waiting in line can teach you
• The devotional practice missing from Western Buddhism
• What it means to become part of the Earth's immune system

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Winter is coming. The author of Wintering on weathering the cold, dark seasons, literally and otherwise, with rituals, cold-water swimming, reading in the middle of the night, and a lesson from a hibernating dormouse.

Katherine May is the New York Times bestselling author of Wintering: The Power of Rest and Retreat in Difficult Times. She is an internationally renowned writer, podcaster and speaker whose work touches on nature, spirituality, slow living, and neurodivergence; her podcast is The Clearing. Katherine lives by the sea in Whitstable, UK, with her husband, son, and pets.

In this episode we talk about:

• What "wintering" means, and why hard seasons aren't personal failures
• How trees and a hibernating dormouse model surviving the cold
• Katherine's year of cascading disasters while writing Wintering
• The difference between control and agency when the world feels overwhelming
• How fear spreads online like rabbits fleeing danger signals
• Why rest isn't selfish, and how caregivers are denied it
• Rejecting performative rest, ice-bath bros, and biohacked cold-water swimming
• Simple rituals, "first and second sleep," and reading through insomnia

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Plus: surviving cancer twice, what three divorces taught him, and being a Baptist who owns a bourbon company.

Terry Bradshaw is one of America's best-loved sports figures. As quarterback for the Pittsburgh Steelers, the Hall of Famer led his team to four Super Bowl victories. Since retiring from football, Bradshaw has become a celebrated sportscaster, actor, and entrepreneur. "Pappy" Bradshaw and his wife Tammy live in Texas near daughters Rachel, Lacey, and Erin, and their families. His new book is Looking for Terry: A Memoir.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why Terry spent years not knowing he had clinical depression
• The day he broke down sobbing on the field mid-game
• Why men resist asking for help, and what they do instead
• How his wife naming his depression "Roy" makes it more manageable
• His lifelong struggle to win his mother's approval
• What three divorces taught him about himself and marriage
• Squaring his Christian faith with owning a bourbon company
• Surviving two cancers in one year
• Loving life at 78

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This episode is sponsored by: Planet Visionaries: In partnership with The Rolex Perpetual Planet Initiative, listen to or watch Planet Visionaries wherever you get your podcasts.

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We live as if we'll live forever, then die as if we've never lived. A Zen nun and MD on the daily practices that break that pattern.

Sister Dang Nghiem, MD, has a new book called Live Beautifully, Die Beautifully: Field Notes from the Edge of Impermanence. Sister D was born in 1968 in Vietnam during the Tet Offensive, the daughter of a Vietnamese mother and an American soldier. She lost her mother at the age of twelve and immigrated to the United States at the age of seventeen with her brother. Living in various foster homes, she learned English and went on to earn a medical degree from the University of California – San Francisco. After suffering further tragedy and loss, she quit her practice as a doctor to travel to Plum Village monastery in France, founded by Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh, where she was ordained a nun in 2000.

Sister D is the author of a memoir, Healing: A Woman's Journey from Doctor to Nun (2010); Mindfulness as Medicine: A Story of Healing and Spirit (2015); Flowers in the Dark: Reclaiming Your Power to Heal from Trauma with Mindfulness (2021); and The River In Me: Verses of Transformation, Collected Poems (2024).

In this episode we talk about:

• The Buddha's Five Daily Remembrances, and why you'd want to practice them
• Why our denial of aging and death causes far more suffering than aging or death
• How thanking your changing body can turn dread into gratitude
• Thich Nhat Hanh's wisdom of "the non-toothache moment" and hidden everyday happiness
• Treating despair and negative self-talk as small deaths we can release
• Why it's natural to fear death, and how to fear it less
• Why grief has no finish line, and the cost of rushing through it

Related Episodes:

• Buddhist Strategies for Reducing Everyday Addictions
• Your Negative, Ruminating Mind: Here's Your Way Out
• This Episode Will Make You Stronger

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Additional Resources:

This episode is sponsored by: Tin Can: Go to tincan.com/HAPPIER to get $10 off your first order.

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Plus: how to actually change a habit, how to get distance from negative thoughts, why the spark fades, and whether what doesn't kill you really makes you stronger.

Jonathan Haidt is a social psychologist at New York University's Stern School of Business and the #1 New York Times bestselling author of The Anxious Generation.

He is also the author of the recently re-released The Happiness Hypothesis, and of The New York Times bestsellers The Righteous Mind, and The Coddling of the American Mind (with Greg Lukianoff). He has given four TED talks and been named a TIME100 Health leader.

In this episode we talk about:

• A two-word Stoic mantra that keeps you from suffering twice
• Why willpower alone won't change your habits, and what will
• Tricks for getting distance from negative thoughts
• Why the spark fades, and what actually makes love last
• Whether Buddhist non-attachment can be squared with loving your family
• The growing bipartisan backlash against smartphones, social media and AI
• Whether what doesn't kill you really makes you stronger
• Why ancient wisdom matters more in an age of uncertainty

Related Episodes:

• Jonathan Haidt's first appearance on the show

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Additional Resources:

This episode is sponsored by: QUO: Try QUO for free PLUS get 20% off your first 6 months when you go to quo.com/HAPPIER.

Planet Visionaries: In partnership with The Rolex Perpetual Planet Initiative, listen to or watch Planet Visionaries wherever you get your podcasts.

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Plan for the worst without spiraling, catch trouble early, and turn bad news into fuel.

Dr. Raj Panjabi, MD is the author of Safer: A Playbook—Turning Fear into Action and Crisis into Community. He served as Senior Director for Global Health Security and Biodefense at the White House National Security Council (2022-2023) where he co-led the largest vaccination campaign in history against COVID-19 and U.S. responses to other public health crises, including mpox, influenza and Ebola.

A Harvard Medical School physician, Dr. Panjabi is the co-founder and former CEO of Last Mile Health, which has trained thousands of community health workers to bring care to communities beyond the reach of any health system. One of TIME's 100 Most Influential People in the World and TIME's 50 Most Influential People in Healthcare, twice named to the FORTUNE World's 50 Greatest Leaders list, and to FORBES 250 Most Successful Immigrants, Raj has received the TED Prize, Clinton Global Citizen Award, and World Economic Forum's Social Entrepreneur of the Year award.

In this episode we talk about:

• Why denial is hardwired: the evolutionary roots of normalcy bias
• How pre-mortems and Stoic "premeditation of evils" calm the nervous system
• Setting triggers in advance to avoid both overreacting and underreacting
• Missing his infant daughter's heart failure, and what it taught him
• Fleeing Liberia's civil war
• The three circles of community
• Curiosity over control: asking "what's in the way?" instead of blaming
• Holding your purpose tightly and your plans loosely, especially in a disrupted economy
• Why to embrace uncertainty, and how to come out of it stronger

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This episode is sponsored by: Planet Visionaries: In partnership with The Rolex Perpetual Planet Initiative, listen to or watch Planet Visionaries wherever you get your podcasts.

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Why it's OK to go to bed angry, be awkward, and not like your coworkers. Plus, the three kinds of friends you need and the one-line script that makes hard feedback land.

Adam Grant is an organizational psychologist at the Wharton School, where he has been the top-rated professor for seven straight years. His new book is Vibe: The Secrets of Strong Connections in a Lonely World.

Adam's books have sold millions of copies, he's one of TED's most popular speakers, and his podcast Re:Thinking has over 100 million downloads. He's been recognized as the world's second-most influential management thinker and one of Fortune's 40 Under 40.

In this episode we talk about:

• The four kinds of relationships, and which ones most people are missing
• How to stop replaying awkward conversations in your head
• Why men struggle to make friends
• Turning a pal into a companion, including the haunted house trick
• How to give feedback without putting people on the defensive
• Why "agree to disagree" keeps relationships from handling friction
• Why it's OK to go to bed angry
• Why great teams don't require liking your coworkers or daily office time

Related Episodes:

• Adam Grant on Perfectionism and Procrastination
• Adam Grant on the Science of Potential and Achievement
• Adam Grant on Languishing

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Additional Resources:

• Hidden Potential
• Think Again
• Originals
• Give and Take

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Plus: the only two things you really take with you when you leave a job, why following a great boss beats chasing a hot company, and why she thinks "I've missed the boat" on AI is a lie.

Molly Graham is the host of TED's WorkLife podcast, co-founder of the leadership communities Glue Club and the Guild, and writer of Lessons on Substack.

In this episode we talk about:

• What a flock of starlings can teach you about your career
• Why not having a long-term plan might be your secret advantage
• How to navigate your career when you don't have a map
• Why joy at work might not be a luxury after all
• The simple calendar exercise that reveals what's quietly draining you
• Why being great at something doesn't mean you should keep doing it
• The career currency most of us chronically undervalue
• Why you should follow people instead of rocket ships
• How to spot a "LinkedIn crush" before it steers your next move
• The kind of fear that's actually a green light
• Why your calendar is a war zone of unfortunate yeses
• Molly's antidote to the doom narrative around AI at work
• Why it's not too late to get comfortable with AI

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This episode is sponsored by: BetterHelp: BetterHelp works with more than 125 health plan networks, and eligible members have an average copay of just $23 per session with insurance. Visit betterhelp.com/happier to explore your payment options.

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