ChaseLife with Kelly

182: Does Dating Actually Suck? Finding Love After Chaos with Dating Coach Illana Dunn


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In this episode, Kelly dives into the messy and magical world of modern dating with Ilana Dunn. From becoming Hinge's unexpected social media voice to launching Dating Sucks, Ilana opens up about heartbreak, self-worth, friendship breakups, and letting go of the "what if" with an ex. This conversation is real, grounding, and a reminder we all need because the moment you choose yourself, everything about love begins to change.

[3:20] My Hinge Story

"I ended up being the only person they interviewed for the role and overnight I became the face of hinge on social media."

[7:16] The Start of Dating Sucks

"So I just wrote down "dating is hard", like as a temporary name, and I had a meeting with my project management team… And I was just like, "dating sucks." They responded: "I like it, we're gonna do that."

[11:24] The Side Effects of Love

"There's no magic pill to cure a broken heart as amazing as modern medicine is."

[20:01] Non-Negotiable Self

"I value time with myself and I value myself and if somebody doesn't see these things and like them about me, then I don't need that person."

[25:28] Repetition Trap

"You repeat behaviors over and over, and you are responsible for a lot of the pain that you are causing yourself."

[33:38] Unmuting Yourself

"There's nothing wrong with caring or wanting things or having something to say and saying it."

[42:04] The Myth of Instant Chemistry

"Not every 1st date has to be fireworks."

[51:36] Beyond the Bio

"Just give people more of you. What is it like to actually date you? What are the types of places they would go? What are the things they would do? You know, is family in important to you?"

[59:28] No Rings but Still Stings

"Friendship breakups can be more painful than romantic breakups, because it feels like something has to really go wrong for a deep friendship to break apart."

[1:07:06] Tough Times with True Friends

"Life is hard. relationships are hard. But, like, hold your friends close and just be as honest as you can."

[1:14:28] The Unhealthy Anchor

"There's always the what if, you know, with an Ex. You got to see it through, and you got to see that it didn't work. But if you're still hoping, like if they broke up with you and you're trying to stay in their life so that maybe one day they'll change their mind, that's not good."

[1:20:30] Authentic Embrace

"Nothing feels better than being loved for exactly who you are."

Follow Ilana Dunn Solomon on Instagram

@ilanadunn - https://www.instagram.com/ilanadunn?igsh=M2VxY3Vobnc0aHhi

Follow Ilana Dunn Seeing Other People on Instagram

@seeingotherpeople - https://www.instagram.com/seeingotherpeople?igsh=N2sydjJ0dXgzdThn

Connect with Kelly here:

Follow Me on Instagram at @chaselifewithkelly - https://www.instagram.com/chaselifewithkelly/

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Rejection to Redemption - More Details: https://www.chaselifewithkelly.com/rejection-to-redemption

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ChaseLife with KellyBy Kelly Chase

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