Denis has entered his villain era, and it all begins with a truly cursed London flat viewing: broken boiler, space heaters, two families living inside, crying babies, building works overhead, bin-level carpets, and a handwritten note confirming a building-wide cockroach infestation. Nineteen. Hundred. Pounds.

Meanwhile, Mark has been back home in County Clare doing gigs, touring storm damage with his parents, debating gas vs electric cookers, and reminiscing about the glory days of shifting 20 people in Queens nightclub. Very wholesome stuff.

Plus:

• the new Boyzone documentary
• shifting your friends out of boredom
• whether Denis is secretly (or openly) a prick
• and why Irish parents love bringing you on a tour of sheds blown away in storms.

Follow for more queer/straight romance, London chaos, and weekly emotional damage.

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