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Share #242: How Embodying “Breathtaking Generosity” Unlocked $13M & How You Can Build Rich Relationships To Fuel Your Life & Business… w/ Selena Soo
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#242: How Embodying “Breathtaking Generosity” Unlocked $13M & How You Can Build Rich Relationships To Fuel Your Life & Business… w/ Selena Soo
Back in college, I took a $2,000 prize from a business plan competition in Sweden and made what seemed like a bold move at the time…
I invested all of it into an online course called Zero to Launch by Ramit Sethi.
One of the star students featured in the program?
Selena Soo.
Even then, I was blown away by her track record — so it was kind of a funny and full circle moment when my friend Jhana Li introduced me to her to bring her on the podcast to talk about her new book Rich Relationships.
Over the past 10 years, Selena has generated over $13M in revenue, built 400+ affiliate and referral partnerships, and helped thousands of entrepreneurs land features in places like Oprah Magazine, Forbes, and The Drew Barrymore Show.
But here’s what impressed me most:
Her intentional way of approaching relationships.
In this episode, we dive into some seriously transformational stuff, including:
- 💸 The “Generosity Fund” — a brilliant idea that redefines ROI in relationships and might make you rethink your Facebook ads budget
- 🔎 How to identify your unconscious patterns that may have lead to unhealthy relationships — and how to rewrite them
- 🫶 Selena’s “GIVE” Framework — how to make clear, generous asks that actually inspire people to want to support you
We also talk about the Six Circles of Connection — her mental model for protecting your energy and getting clear on which relationships to invest in and how.
If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed trying to “network,” unsure how to ask for support, or drained by lopsided relationships…
This episode will rewire how you think about connection.
00:00 - Introduction to Beyond Curious and today's guest, Selena Soo
Brandon Fong introduces the show and highlights Selena Soo's impactful work. He shares a personal full-circle story about discovering Selena through Ramit Sethi’s course and announces the main themes of today’s episode: the generosity fund, the GIVE framework, healing unhealthy patterns, and Selena’s six circles of connection model.
00:05:24 - Selena shares a story of her mother’s fearless curiosity and social grace
Selena recounts a touching story about her mother making an unexpected connection with a punk couple at a sushi bar in NYC. The anecdote illustrates the value of curiosity and presence in creating rich relationships, setting the stage for defining what those relationships look like.
00:10:22 - The serendipitous moment Selena met Ramit Sethi
Selena shares how spotting Ramit Sethi on the street led to a transformative mentorship. She describes going above and beyond by offering five hours of feedback instead of five minutes—an act of "breathtaking generosity" that became a pillar in her success and philosophy.
00:15:22 - What is a “rich relationship”? Selena defines her core concept
Selena outlines her definition: a relationship that enriches your life through abundance, alignment with your goals, and inspiration to become your best self. Brandon and Selena unpack the depth-over-width mindset for nurturing meaningful connections.
00:18:01 - Introducing Selena’s “Six Circles of Connection” framework
Selena dives into her popular model for managing relationship energy: Circle 1 (innermost) through Circle 6 (unconnected). She explains how to apply this model to prioritize and categorize relationships for personal and professional growth.
00:26:28 - How Selena uses a “Top 40 List” to stay in touch with key connections
Brandon asks how Selena operationalizes her relationships. Selena describes maintaining a dynamic list of 40 people to nurture throughout the year with a monthly “nurturing appointment” to stay connected and intentionally generous.
00:30:41 - The “Generosity Fund”: A new way to think about your relationship budget
Selena introduces her standout concept of the generosity fund—repurposing a budget traditionally used for marketing or Facebook ads into deepening relationships through acts of generosity. Brandon shares how he applied this idea by gifting his executive assistant’s time.
00:36:09 - How a $200 gift turned into $18,000 in value
Selena recounts using her generosity fund to purchase coaching sessions from a money coach and gifting them to friends. One recipient saved $1,500/month as a result—a real-life case of triple-win generosity.
00:41:05 - “Relaxed abundance”: Giving without attachment
Selena explains her philosophy of giving freely and fully without expecting immediate return. She contrasts this with transactional giving and encourages building energetically aligned relationships.
00:44:02 - Why people don’t receive support—and how to change that
Selena identifies three main reasons why people don’t receive help: lack of clarity, weak relationships, and difficulty asking. She walks through each with practical examples and reflections.
00:47:53 - The GIVE Framework for making impactful requests
Selena reveals her GIVE formula: Gratitude, Inspire, Very specific, Easy out. She models how she used it to raise $100,000 in book sales by asking supporters to buy in bulk with clarity and warmth.
00:52:42 - Recognizing and escaping toxic relationships
Brandon invites Selena to share a painful story of an emotionally and financially abusive romantic relationship. Selena vulnerably discusses how it evolved, how she escaped, and the critical lessons she learned about maintaining integrity in relationships.
00:58:55 - Uncovering unconscious patterns through a journaling exercise
Selena outlines a journaling exercise to identify patterns in past unhealthy relationships. She describes how analyzing what attracted you and what turned toxic can help stop repeated mistakes and build healthier future relationships.
Links & Resources:
- Selena Soo’s website
- Selena Soo’s Linkedin Profile
- Selena Soo’s Book: Rich Relationships – Create a Million Dollar Network for Your Business
- Zero to Launch by Ramit Sethi – The course where Brandon first discovered Selena
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By Brandon Fong
5
151151 ratings
Back in college, I took a $2,000 prize from a business plan competition in Sweden and made what seemed like a bold move at the time…
I invested all of it into an online course called Zero to Launch by Ramit Sethi.
One of the star students featured in the program?
Selena Soo.
Even then, I was blown away by her track record — so it was kind of a funny and full circle moment when my friend Jhana Li introduced me to her to bring her on the podcast to talk about her new book Rich Relationships.
Over the past 10 years, Selena has generated over $13M in revenue, built 400+ affiliate and referral partnerships, and helped thousands of entrepreneurs land features in places like Oprah Magazine, Forbes, and The Drew Barrymore Show.
But here’s what impressed me most:
Her intentional way of approaching relationships.
In this episode, we dive into some seriously transformational stuff, including:
- 💸 The “Generosity Fund” — a brilliant idea that redefines ROI in relationships and might make you rethink your Facebook ads budget
- 🔎 How to identify your unconscious patterns that may have lead to unhealthy relationships — and how to rewrite them
- 🫶 Selena’s “GIVE” Framework — how to make clear, generous asks that actually inspire people to want to support you
We also talk about the Six Circles of Connection — her mental model for protecting your energy and getting clear on which relationships to invest in and how.
If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed trying to “network,” unsure how to ask for support, or drained by lopsided relationships…
This episode will rewire how you think about connection.
00:00 - Introduction to Beyond Curious and today's guest, Selena Soo
Brandon Fong introduces the show and highlights Selena Soo's impactful work. He shares a personal full-circle story about discovering Selena through Ramit Sethi’s course and announces the main themes of today’s episode: the generosity fund, the GIVE framework, healing unhealthy patterns, and Selena’s six circles of connection model.
00:05:24 - Selena shares a story of her mother’s fearless curiosity and social grace
Selena recounts a touching story about her mother making an unexpected connection with a punk couple at a sushi bar in NYC. The anecdote illustrates the value of curiosity and presence in creating rich relationships, setting the stage for defining what those relationships look like.
00:10:22 - The serendipitous moment Selena met Ramit Sethi
Selena shares how spotting Ramit Sethi on the street led to a transformative mentorship. She describes going above and beyond by offering five hours of feedback instead of five minutes—an act of "breathtaking generosity" that became a pillar in her success and philosophy.
00:15:22 - What is a “rich relationship”? Selena defines her core concept
Selena outlines her definition: a relationship that enriches your life through abundance, alignment with your goals, and inspiration to become your best self. Brandon and Selena unpack the depth-over-width mindset for nurturing meaningful connections.
00:18:01 - Introducing Selena’s “Six Circles of Connection” framework
Selena dives into her popular model for managing relationship energy: Circle 1 (innermost) through Circle 6 (unconnected). She explains how to apply this model to prioritize and categorize relationships for personal and professional growth.
00:26:28 - How Selena uses a “Top 40 List” to stay in touch with key connections
Brandon asks how Selena operationalizes her relationships. Selena describes maintaining a dynamic list of 40 people to nurture throughout the year with a monthly “nurturing appointment” to stay connected and intentionally generous.
00:30:41 - The “Generosity Fund”: A new way to think about your relationship budget
Selena introduces her standout concept of the generosity fund—repurposing a budget traditionally used for marketing or Facebook ads into deepening relationships through acts of generosity. Brandon shares how he applied this idea by gifting his executive assistant’s time.
00:36:09 - How a $200 gift turned into $18,000 in value
Selena recounts using her generosity fund to purchase coaching sessions from a money coach and gifting them to friends. One recipient saved $1,500/month as a result—a real-life case of triple-win generosity.
00:41:05 - “Relaxed abundance”: Giving without attachment
Selena explains her philosophy of giving freely and fully without expecting immediate return. She contrasts this with transactional giving and encourages building energetically aligned relationships.
00:44:02 - Why people don’t receive support—and how to change that
Selena identifies three main reasons why people don’t receive help: lack of clarity, weak relationships, and difficulty asking. She walks through each with practical examples and reflections.
00:47:53 - The GIVE Framework for making impactful requests
Selena reveals her GIVE formula: Gratitude, Inspire, Very specific, Easy out. She models how she used it to raise $100,000 in book sales by asking supporters to buy in bulk with clarity and warmth.
00:52:42 - Recognizing and escaping toxic relationships
Brandon invites Selena to share a painful story of an emotionally and financially abusive romantic relationship. Selena vulnerably discusses how it evolved, how she escaped, and the critical lessons she learned about maintaining integrity in relationships.
00:58:55 - Uncovering unconscious patterns through a journaling exercise
Selena outlines a journaling exercise to identify patterns in past unhealthy relationships. She describes how analyzing what attracted you and what turned toxic can help stop repeated mistakes and build healthier future relationships.
Links & Resources:
- Selena Soo’s website
- Selena Soo’s Linkedin Profile
- Selena Soo’s Book: Rich Relationships – Create a Million Dollar Network for Your Business
- Zero to Launch by Ramit Sethi – The course where Brandon first discovered Selena
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