This is live from NYC Central Park

In this episode of 420 Reasons Why I Quit Drinking Alcohol, I tell the story of being set up with my friend’s brother—a guy who, on the surface, seemed like a good match. But what no one told me, what no one was honest about, was that he was a complete mess.

There were whispers of red flags, but no one waved them in front of me. Everyone stayed quiet. I was left to discover the truth on my own—slowly, painfully—as I tried to convince myself that this could be something real.

Looking back, I realize how often I ended up in situations like this—messy, unfiltered, avoidable—because I was so used to numbing out with alcohol. I didn’t trust my intuition. I ignored my gut. And I surrounded myself with people who didn’t want to rock the boat by being honest. I thought I was chasing love and connection, but I was actually attracting chaos because I hadn’t yet learned how to choose peace.

When we’re drinking, we tend to attract what we reflect—unresolved hurt, inner chaos, and confusion. And sometimes, the people around us enable it by staying silent. They mean well, but the silence is damaging.

Here’s the message: You deserve honesty. You deserve people who speak up when something’s off. And most importantly, you deserve to trust yourself enough to walk away when your gut says no—even if no one else will say it for you.

Alcohol muted my voice and dulled my instincts. Sobriety gave both back.

Ask yourself: Are you surrounding yourself with people who protect your peace—or just preserve your comfort?

✨ Reflection & Message:

In this episode of 420 Reasons Why I Quit Drinking Alcohol, I share a moment that started with the best of intentions—a weekend date out of town—and took a sharp left turn thanks to alcohol, impulse, and an old flame.

My date had to duck out for a bit to attend his kid’s soccer game, and instead of tagging along or giving him space respectfully, I took a detour—right into an unexpected reunion with an old friend I’d once crushed on. One drink turned into too many, and suddenly I wasn’t just catching up—I was deep in the party, ignoring the person I was actually there to see.

I never made it back to reconnect with my date that night.

The next morning? Embarrassed, hungover, and full of regret. I had to lie, grovel, and basically beg my way back to his house to retrieve my car—and my dignity.

This episode reminds me how often I let alcohol make the decisions for me—pulling me off track from what I said I wanted. It was like I was constantly chasing the next thrill, while quietly blowing up the bridges I was trying to build.

When you drink, priorities shift, boundaries blur, and before you know it, you're standing in the wreckage of yet another “almost” moment—apologizing for a version of yourself that doesn’t line up with who you really want to be.

So here’s the message:
Alcohol is a detour dressed as a good time. If you find yourself constantly veering off course, ask yourself: Is this really me—or just the version of me that shows up when I’m drinking?

You don’t have to keep eating crow. You can choose a path that aligns with your values—and that starts with clarity.

 Reflection & Message:

For years, I felt anxious if I didn’t have weekend plans. The fear didn’t start on Friday — it started on Monday. I wasn’t just worried about being bored; I was afraid of being alone with myself.

Drinking became my escape from that discomfort — from the silence, the stillness, and the version of me I didn’t want to face. I filled my life with busyness and social events, not for joy, but to avoid the anxiety that came with being home, sober, and still.

Now, after quitting alcohol, I’ve learned to sit with myself. I’ve grown to enjoy solitude and no longer feel the panic of an empty calendar. In fact, sometimes I have to remind myself not to cancel plans — because peace no longer feels like loneliness. It feels like freedom.

If this hits home, take a moment to ask yourself: what are you really running from? You might find that what you fear in stillness is actually where your healing begins.
✨ Share this with someone who needs to hear it, or message me if you’re in that place — you’re not alone.

In this episode of 420 Reasons Why I Quit Drinking Alcohol, I take you back to a wild summer in Ludington—where our garage turned into the hottest underground party spot in town. What started as a simple three-stall garage at our grandma’s house quickly transformed into a nightly destination: music, darts, a pool table, and enough booze to keep the party going until dawn.

Every night, we swore we wouldn’t do it again. But like clockwork, we’d leave the bar and head right back home to keep the night alive. It felt like freedom—but in truth, we were robbing ourselves of rest, clarity, and connection to who we really were.

Now, with a clearer mind, I realize we weren’t just throwing parties—we were running from ourselves. We thought we were “living life to the fullest,” but really, we were stealing time and energy from our future selves.

Reflection & Message:
Sometimes the biggest lie we tell ourselves is, “Just one more night.” But every night spent escaping was one less night truly lived. The garage parties might have been full of people and noise, but I look back now and see how empty they really were.

Ask yourself: Are you chasing fun—or avoiding something deeper? True freedom doesn’t come from late nights and hangovers—it comes from facing your truth and finding peace with it.

Podcast Summary:

In this episode of 420 Reasons Why I Quit Drinking, I share a story from a road trip that should’ve been a celebration—my BFF’s graduation. But instead of feeling present and proud, alcohol took the front seat… and I found myself slipping into the back seat, both literally and emotionally.

It was one of those moments when you think you don’t have a care in the world—windows down, music up, drinks flowing—but really, you should care. You should care about where you're going, how you’re showing up, and who you’re becoming. But alcohol doesn’t want you to care—it wants control.

That road trip revealed more than just a few poor decisions. It exposed how easily I handed over the wheel—how alcohol took over my sense of judgment, direction, and even my understanding of right and wrong.

Reflection & Message:
So here’s the question I want you to sit with: Who or what is in the driver’s seat of your life?
Are you choosing the direction—or is alcohol steering you off course?

This episode is a wake-up call wrapped in a story—because sometimes, you don’t realize how far off track you’ve gotten until you finally stop and look around. It’s never too late to take back the wheel

In this episode of 420 Reasons Why I Quit Drinking, I share awild and unforgettable story from my Ludington days. Running my family’srestaurant meant I rarely got a break—but one weekend, I finally made it toChicago for a girls’ night out with my high school friends. And when wepartied, we really partied—like there was no tomorrow.

After shutting downtheir go-to bar, Four Farthings, we moved the party to an apartment on LakeShore Drive. The drinks kept flowing, the smoke was thick, and the night turnedinto a haze of chaos. I was the first to pass out on the living room floor—partystill raging around me.

But what happenednext shocked everyone. At sunrise, instead of being greeted with coffee, I wasmet with a giant pile of nose candy and a line ready to go. Groggy and feelinglike hell, I looked up and said, "You wantme to join you? Well, F**K YEAH—here goes it!" And I dove straightinto the pile.

The room wentsilent. The girls screamed in horror and disbelief. They were pissed—andrightfully so. That moment just added fuel to the fire of shame andself-loathing I already felt. My brain felt like a pile of mush, I felt like apile of shit, and eventually, we all ended up sprawled out in piles on a frontlawn in the suburbs.

This episode isabout more than just a wild night—it’s about waking up, literally andspiritually, to what my life had become… and finally deciding it was time tochange.

In this episode of 420 Reasons Why I Quit Drinking, I recount a Cinco de Mayo celebration that took a dark and unforgettable turn. What began as a joyful brunch with my best friends—who came to visit me and their daughter nearby—spiraled into a full-blown blackout.

From shots of Jägermeister (aka “liquid heroin”) to falling off barstools and waking up with no idea how we got home or where we even were, this wasn’t just a party gone wild—it was a moment that left me shaken and hollow.

This story isn't just about what happened—it's about the why behind it. Why did I think that level of chaos was fun? Why did I keep calling this connection and celebration when it was really disconnection and escape?

In this reflection, I share how moments like this helped wake me up to the truth: that blackouts weren’t funny, they were warnings. And healing began when I finally started listening.

In this episode of 420 Reasons Why I Quit Drinking, I explore the fear of not having enough—that anxious urge to over-prepare, especially when it comes to alcohol. I share a memory from a friend’s wedding, where we packed our own roadies and backup booze, just in case. And good thing (or so we thought), because there was only one bottle of wine per table of eight—barely enough for one of us, let alone the whole group.

That moment made me reflect on a deeper pattern. Even now, I catch myself doing the same thing—overpacking my car for work trips, bringing way more than I need, driven by that old fear of what if I don’t have enough?

This episode is about recognizing those lingering mindsets, how they show up in unexpected ways, and how choosing trust over fear has opened the door to true freedom and peace.

It’s truly remarkable to be here, celebrating the start of Season 4 of 420 Reasons Why I Quit Drinking. I’m filled with deep gratitude for all of you who continue to listen, support, and walk this journey with me.

In this season, I continue to share the raw truth—my stories of drinking, partying, and living a life I eventually realized I no longer wanted. By opening up about my past, my secrets, and the lessons I’ve learned, I’ve found healing, transformation, and a new way of living.

Through God's light and guidance, I’m now fully awake, choosing to live my best life for the rest of my life. I’ve come to truly understand the impact alcohol and weed had on my mind, my spirit, and my potential—and what freedom looks like on the other side.

Thank you for coming back week after week. Your support makes all of this possible. I love you all! Let’s keep growing, healing, and living vibrantly—together. 🌟