The Recalibration

#64 Being Misunderstood Might Mean You’re On the Right Track


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If others don’t see who you’re becoming, it doesn’t mean you’re off track. In this episode, we explore why feeling misunderstood might be the strongest evidence you’re walking in integrity.

You’ve made the shift. You’ve shown up differently. You’ve honored the internal clarity you didn’t used to have — but others aren’t seeing it yet. They still reference who you used to be. And somewhere inside, you wonder: Am I doing this wrong if no one recognizes it yet?

This episode of Identity-Level Recalibration helps reframe that doubt. Julie Holly explores what happens when your identity shifts faster than the story others hold about you — and how that dissonance, while painful, might actually confirm your alignment.

You’ll learn about the social reflection loop, how your nervous system reacts to being perceived through an outdated lens, and why holding your new identity — even without external validation — is part of becoming. Through Julie’s personal experience and a fresh founder story featuring Jim McKelvey (Square), you’ll walk away with language for what you’re living through — and a micro-recalibration to help you lead through it.

🔍 In This Episode, We Cover:

  • Why feeling misunderstood doesn’t mean you’re off path
  • What ILR calls the social reflection loop
  • How your nervous system interprets identity dissonance as threat
  • Julie’s real-life shift out of real estate and into ILR
  • Jim McKelvey’s story of vision, misjudgment, and category creation
  • How to resist the urge to return to being “digestible”
  • Why impact doesn’t require recognition — just obedience

🧭 Today’s Micro-Recalibration:

Ask yourself:

  • Where have I been waiting to be seen before I act?
  • Where have I toned down my clarity to preserve connection?

Anchor this:
“Misunderstood doesn’t mean misaligned.”

If you lead — in your business, home, or creative work — model what it looks like to stay steady while others recalibrate to your clarity. You’re not here to prove. You’re here to walk in integrity.

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The RecalibrationBy Julie Holly

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