Forgive Yourself

82: Why Your Brain Sabotages the Growth You're Seeking (And How to Work With It)


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"Your whole being is saying nope, nope, nope, not right now." Sound familiar? This solo episode dives into something we all experience - that moment when we know change would be good for us, but we find ourselves resisting it anyway.


Resistance isn't failure or brokenness. It's often a sign you're on the right track; your system just hasn't caught up yet. After noticing this pattern with clients, friends, and colleagues lately, I felt called to explore why we resist the very growth we're seeking.


I break down three core reasons resistance shows up in our lives. First, growth threatens our familiar identity - even when our old self isn't happy, it's what we know. I share the story of a client who'd been the family "fixer" for decades and felt deep unease when setting boundaries because she didn't know who she'd be without that role.


Second, change disrupts our sense of safety and control. Our survival brain screams "danger" at the unknown, even when our conscious mind wants the change. I get vulnerable about staying in unfulfilling situations because "the pain I knew felt safer than the uncertainty of change."


Third, growth forces us to face discomfort we've been avoiding - grief, anger, shame, hurt. I share how my own resistance to forgiveness work was actually protection from decades of suppressed emotions.


Each reason comes with a gentle reframe to help you move forward with self-compassion rather than self-judgment. Because resistance isn't a stop sign - it's a signal that your system is adjusting.


Resources:

Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/


Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60

  

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Forgive YourselfBy Brenda Reiss

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