A Jaded Gay

In previous episodes, we explored the history of gay representation in TV and film, touching on stereotypes and the challenges faced by queer creators. One major roadblock has been the "Bury Your Gays" trope, which limits authentic representation by perpetuating harmful narratives that often depict LGBTQ+ characters as tragic or expendable, rather than allowing for diverse, fully realized stories.

In this episode, we’re diving into the origins of the "Bury Your Gays" trope, examining its ongoing presence in media, and discussing how creators can shift away from it to foster more authentic and meaningful LGBTQ+ representation in the future.

Related Episodes:

• Listen to Episode 06. Gay Panic Defense
• Listen to Episode 07. The History of Gay Representation in TV & Film
• Listen to Episode 28. Gay Horror
• Listen to Episode 80. Queer Haunts: Happy Halloween (with Ralph Anthony)
• Listen to Episode 97. Diversifying Queer Horror Cinema (with Jose Nateras)
• Listen to Episode 108. Celebrate Queer Joy

Additional Resources:

• Bury Your Gays
• Vasquez Always Dies
• Ever Wondered How to Kill Off a Queer Character Without Falling into the 'Bury Your Gays' Trope?
• Hollywood's "Bury Your Gays" Trope Explained: History & Controversy
• Depraved Homosexual
• 15 Recent, Especially Brutal, Examples of the Bury Your Gays Trope
• Supernatural: Castiel Sacrifices Himself to Save Dean From Death
• It Chapter Two: Adrian Mellon Death Scene

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In previous episodes, we've explored how queer themes have been woven into horror for over 250 years, mirroring experiences of otherness, fear, and survival—common realities for those facing societal marginalization. Today, the horror genre has transcended traditional media channels, expanding its reach through platforms like YouTube and podcasts, where creators can explore these themes in fresh, innovative ways.

In this episode, Bobby Torrez, a horror YouTuber and podcaster, joins us to discuss the ins and outs of his horror reviews, navigate stereotypes and tropes in horror, and discuss how queer horror can push boundaries to become even more inclusive.

Related Episodes:

• Listen to Episode 28. Gay Horror
• Listen to Episode 80. Queer Haunts: Happy Halloween (with Ralph Anthony)
• Listen to Episode 97. Diversifying Queer Horror Cinema (with Jose Nateras)

Additional Resources:

• Follow Bobby Torrez on Instagram
• Follow Bobby Torrez on Twitter
• Subscribe to Bobby Likes It Spooky
• Tune in to People Under the Scares
• Tune in to Scream Kingz Podcast

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Coming out is a deeply personal and pivotal moment for LGBTQ+ individuals, encompassing the courageous act of sharing their authentic identity with others, fostering self-acceptance, and seeking understanding and validation.

In this episode, I reflect on my coming out journey from a decade ago, sharing the funny, cringey, and self-discovery that have shaped me along the way.

Related Episodes:

• Listen to Episode 77. Coming Out
• Listen to Episode 99. Coming Out Later in Life (with Kevin O’ Connor)

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Presidential administrations significantly influence the well-being of the LGBTQ+ community through their policies on civil rights, healthcare, and anti-discrimination protections, which can either advance or hinder equality and acceptance. Additionally, an administration's public stance on LGBTQ+ issues sets a national tone, impacting societal attitudes and the lived experiences of LGBTQ+ individuals.

In this episode, we’re reviewing the Trump administration's stance on LGBTQ+ rights from 2017 to 2021, examining the impact of its actions on civil rights, healthcare access, and protections for the LGBTQ+ community.

Related Episodes:

• Listen to Episode 03. Surviving Another Pandemic
• Listen to Episode 27. Matthew Shepard
• Listen to Episode 112. Project 2025

Additional Resources:

• GLAAD's Trump Accountability Tracker
• Trump in 1999: "I Am Very Pro-Choice"
• The Advocate Interview with Donald Trump
• Donald Trump’s More Accepting Views on Gay Issues Set Him Apart in G.O.P.
• "It’s Not My Thing": A History of Trump’s Shifting Relationship with the LGBT Community
• Donald Trump Congratulated Elton John on His Civil Partnership in 2005
• Donald Trump Says He’s Against Gay Marriage
• Does Donald Trump Support Civil Unions or Not?
• Gay Conservatives Bring Trump and the Party to CPAC
• Donald Trump Has Words for Transgender Miss Universe Contestant
• Donald Trump Comes Out Against North Carolina's HB2
• LGBT Groups Blast Trump for Voicing Support for HB2 in Raleigh
• Read Donald Trump’s Speech on the Orlando Shooting
• Trump Has Appointed 216 New Federal Judges and it Could Be 230 By Election Day
• A Third of Trump's Court Nominees have Anti-LGBTQ History, Report Finds

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In numerous episodes, we’ve learned that gay men are more likely to struggle with mental health issues due to the trauma experienced from growing up in a society that often stigmatizes their identity. Despite these challenges, we must heal from trauma so we can lead fulfilling lives and make a difference for the LGBTQ+ community, fostering both personal well-being and collective resilience.

In this episode, Dr. Jason Durant, a prominent gay psychologist, joins us to discuss how his own journey has shaped his empathetic and insightful approach to therapy, how he addresses common mental health struggles gay men face, and his new book, which offers valuable guidance and support for gay men navigating their mental health journeys.

Related Episodes:

• Listen to Episode 11. Overcoming Internalized Homophobia
• Listen to Episode 26. Gay & Anxious
• Listen to Episode 42. Are You Emotionally Unavailable?

Additional Resources:

• Learn More About Dr. Jason Durant
• Follow Dr. Jason Durant on Instagram
• Buy Boy From the North Country: A Queer Therapist Looks Back at Overcoming Trauma With Mindfulness

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Since the 1890s, the term queer was initially used as a derogatory slur against gay men until it was later reclaimed by the LGBTQ+ community as a symbol of empowerment and inclusivity. Today, it’s used non-offensively as an inclusive term that embraces a wide spectrum of sexual orientations and gender identities within the community.

In this episode, we're taking a look into the etymology of the word queer, tracing its origins as a slur, and examining the pivotal moments and motivations behind the LGBTQ+ community's powerful reclamation of the term.

Related Episodes:

• Listen to Bonus 12. Spooky Storytime
• Listen to Episode 03. Surviving Another Pandemic
• Listen to Episode 23. Let's Talk About the F Word
• Listen to Episode 51. ACT UP: Silence = Death

Additional Resources:

• Queer (Etymology)
• Queer (Definition)
• How the Word ‘Queer’ was Adopted by the LGBTQ Community
• Marquess of Queensberry
• ‘Queer’ History: A History of Queer
• Oscar Wilde Trial
• Reviled, Reclaimed and Respected: The History of the Word 'Queer'
• Come Out!

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In recent years, several states have enacted bans on queer books, citing unsubstantiated claims ranging from content deemed inappropriate to concerns about age-appropriateness. These bans have restricted access to diverse and affirming literature for the LGBTQ+ community, leading to feelings of erasure and marginalization, and hindered the representation and visibility of queer identities, which is crucial for fostering understanding and acceptance.

In this episode, Alexander Rigby, a New York Times Bestselling Editor at Penguin Random House and curator of the publisher’s LGBTQ+ Network, joins us to discuss the impacts of queer book bans on LGBTQ+ people, how Penguin Random House is continuing to promote queer voices, and ways the LGBTQ+ community can support queer authors and push back against unjust book bans.

Related Episodes:

• Listen to Episode 95. Take a Page from #GayBookstagram (with Rod Lujano)
• Listen to Episode 101. Sci-Fi: The Future is Queer (with TQ Sims)

Additional Resources:

• Learn More About Alexander Rigby
• Follow Alexander on Instagram
• Follow Penguin Random House LGBTQ+ Network on Instagram
• Check Out Pride in Your Words
• Follow Penguin Random House on Instagram

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Heterosexism is a system of attitudes, biases, and discrimination that privileges heterosexuality and marginalizes and oppresses LGBTQ+ people. This pervasive bias can lead to significant negative impacts on LGBTQ+ individuals, including increased rates of mental health issues, social isolation, and barriers to accessing healthcare and other essential services.

In this episode, we’re delving into the concept of heterosexism, exploring how it manifests in various aspects of society, the trauma it can inflict on LGBTQ+ individuals, and strategies for overcoming this pervasive bias.

Related Episodes:

• Listen to Episode 39. We Are Family: Part 1 (with Michelle Loveless)
• Listen to Episode 59. Say Bye Bye Bye to Bi Erasure (with Sam McClain)
• Listen to Episode 63. The Stonewall Riots
• Listen to Episode 69. That's So Gay (You Really Shouldn't Say That)

Additional Resources:

• Homophobia Definition
• George Weinberg
• Heterosexism (Definition)
• The Stonewall Riots: Coming Out in the Streets
• Heroes of Stonewall: Craig Rodwell
• Beyond “Homophobia”: Thinking About Sexual Prejudice and Stigma in the Twenty-First Century
• Prejudice, Social Stress, and Mental Health in Lesbian, Gay, and Bisexual Populations: Conceptual Issues and Research Evidence
• The Context of Anti-Gay Violence
• Homophobia: A Weapon of Sexism
• Heterosexism & Homophobia
• Heterosexist Microaggressions, Student Academic Experience and Perception of Campus Climate: Findings From an Italian Higher Education Context
• Microaggressions in Everyday Life: Race, Gender, and Sexual Orientation
• How Heterosexism Can Be Traumatic
• How to Combat Heterosexism

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In previous episodes, we explored pop culture’s resonance with the LGBTQ+ community, serving as both a reflection of societal changes and a source of representation and validation. Pop icons in music, film, television, and other media often highlight diverse narratives and characters that resonate with the experiences and identities of LGBTQ+ people while advocating for equal rights and visibility.

In this episode, Carmine Davis, singer and host of The Carmine Davis Show, joins us to discuss his relationship with pop culture, icons who have inspired his career, and how inclusive pop culture can be a positive force of change for the LGBTQ+ community.

Related Episodes:

• Listen to Episode 04. Pop Icons and Their Gay Emotional Appeal

Additional Resources:

• Learn More About Carmine Davis
• Follow Carmine Davis on Instagram
• Tune in to The Carmine Davis Show
• Stream All Friendship is Romantic
• Book Carmine Davis on Cameo

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Art has been a vital form of expression for queer people, providing a powerful platform to explore, celebrate, and communicate their identities, experiences, and struggles in a world where their voices are often marginalized.

In this episode, Jacoby Nordberg joins us to discuss his experiences as a queer artist, exploring how art serves as a profound medium for expressing his identity and the broader impact of art in empowering and giving voice to the LGBTQ+ community.

Additional Resources:

• Learn More About Jacoby Nordberg
• Follow Jacoby on Instagram
• Follow Jacoby on TikTok
• Check Out Jacoby’s Portfolio

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